Kirby has just swallowed you, what power did he gain?

Kirby has just swallowed you, what power did he gain?

The ability to not care.

I.T. Kirby.

Unlimited sexual energy.

An inexplicable attraction to Dedede.

bad breath

the sleep one
good night anons

ability to replay crash 2 and deus ex countless times

Are you me?

Crippling depression and suicidal thoughts.

itt hundreds of replies involving depression/self loathing

finally

A cute and loving girlfriend, the respect and unconditional friendship of tens of peers, a stable and gratifying job and a fruitful academic career in a field he enjoys very much.

UFO because I'm a pretty random dude xD

hey fuck you dude

The ability to cum twice in one minute

...

...

Could be, fatty.

the ability to inhale things and gain their powers poyo

Autism

The ability to get up from sitting criss-cross-applesauce without using hands.

...

political views outside the acceptable frame.

No bully

incapacity

It's a compliment.

major depressive disorder

Being self conscious about everything

A crippling addiction to lolis

The ability to locate pidgeons

you walk like a virgin and you dont clean up.good enough after jacking it. you smell like semen haha

An addiction to lolis

What does Lolicon Kirby even look like?

The same, it's easier to get close to lolis when you're a cute pink puff

Hmmmm

First, Kirby can't even sit that way can he?
Second, can't everyone do this?

not if you're a fat

The power to be a worthless pile of procrastinating shit.

The ability to jerk off three times in a row

The power to kill himself

s-stop pls

cringe

An extreme amount of apathy and antisocial behavior.

no bully

Degeneration

Crippling depression.

cow print bikini fetish

The ability to have good anal without mud pits.

The ability to fap 3 to 4 times a day

The ability to stuff an infinite amount of corn cobs up the butthole.

Sauce me up senpai

I'm wearing a Subway uniform, so Kirby can finally make sandwiches.

Also intense hatred.

Penguindou

The power of a mediocre lifter. Enjoy your lmao 2.2xBW deadlift, 1.8xBW squat and 1.4xBW bench.

People will generally like him for some reason but he won't know why.

This one

Being excellent in all walks of life

Feel it every moment

Probably some form of autism

He now want to kill himself on a daily basis.

I jacked off for 5+ hours straight once

He gained the power of always going back to playing the same games that he's familiar with, even though he wants to play so much more.

the ability to take 2 cocks into my anus at the same time

diabeetus

Clarification of a misconception regarding the lore of Kirby
Kirby doesn't get a power that's directly 1:1 with yours
Kirby only gets the copy ability closest in association.
If Kirby swallowed a Pikachu, he wouldn't turn into "Pikachu Kirby" (except in Smash Bros but that's not canon) he'd just be Plasma or Spark Kirby because it'd be the closest thing to it.
Thank you for reading

edgy political views isn't exactly specific