Be 17

>Be 17
>Depressed as fuck
>No gf, no friends, no dreams, family treats me like shit
>Consider seppuku
>Almost get caught, scared as fuck
>Go to psychologist
>Gives me pills and send me on my way
>Pills don't help
>Go to psychologist again
>"lol how about more of da same pills btw give me money"
>fast forward to 21st birthday
>feeling even worse
>tried to get over it and "man the fuck up"
>hahaha no
>start looking for new psychologist
>go for the span of two months, he says he's studying me to get a clear diagnosis
>he ends up recommending meditation (?) and homeopathy (???)
>I payed him a lot of money for this bullshit
>Give up
>Try to seppuku
>Get helium for balloons
>Send message to only friend to go look for my corpse
>2 am, she works so I'm possitive she wil only read it around 7 am
>Get everything ready
>Then notice
>Motherfucking valve has to be constantly pressed
>Fuck
>Try to do it anyway
>Only lose consciousness
>Wake up at 7 am
>Calls from fucking everyone
>Fuck
>cue a bunch of people talking about what to do to fix my life
>No honest answer
>Same bullshit all the time
>People come from far and wide to claim the shit I've tried and heard about already is what will fix my entire life
>feel even worse
>desperate at this point
>post on Sup Forums, /adv/, Reddit, even fucking FB
>"go to a psycologist"
>no real choice so I go to one
>get pills again
>pills make me feel apathetic
>complain to psycologist
>"how about some more pills"
>nottudesushittoagen.jpg
>go to yet another psychologist
>same pills than doctor 1
>nottudesushittoagen.jpg

I fucking dare you to tell me suicide is not my only option. I don't want to kill myself but what choice do I have, crying in bed to sleep for the rest of my life? Fuck that. It's not like I have a choice or something. I don't want to do it Sup Forums, but I can't keep on suffering anymore. Fuck life, I'm getting a shotgun or something.

The world is your oyster. Crack that bitch open and suck some juice out.

I don't know. I only read about 6 lines and I started to hate you a little.

>trying to hill yourself with helium

just jump off a fucking building idiot. Also, killing yourself is some weak shit. You're also a moron for thinking going to one of those fake ass niggas would help. Just go do whatever the fuck you want at this point. If you're going to kill yourself anyway, why not? Go on a trip, do something you've always wanted, or you know..literally fucking anything. Once you do that and you still want to kill yourself jump off a cliff or something.

Go travel around the world.

smoke crack

Fear hell

Same fucking shit again. Travel the world, enjoy life, do drugs, etc. I don't know why I even bother. Wait I do know, I'm desperate. But seriously if you're only going to paste some tumblr level advise , please don't fucking bother.

...

Hey OP.

Buy some concrete and encase your left foot in it.

Drive to a river.

Go swimming.
Have fun!

Fix your attitude, that's all I can say, you can say "muh depression" well I've been there before, all it takes is you telling yourself that you're the one causing all of these problems. If you can't get past your shitty edgy attitude then honestly just go ahead and do a backflip

Well if you're going to hill yourself, then I recommend using propane sold by Strickland Propane.

So you made it from 17 to 21 feeling the way you do. Did you ever think about that? You should be proud.

I was exactly where you are and now I'm almost 30, with a wife and a son.

Is life any easier? Fuck no it's harder. I decided not to give up.

Proud of ruining my every chance of happiness? Proud of dropping out of college because I can't look at myself in the mirror in the morning? Proud of living in trash, with a gigantic scholarship debt and no way to pay it?

Fuck you

Wtf is the actual problem? Is it that you claim you do not have any friends?

you can still make a life for yourself, you should be proud. clean your shit up, and everyone's in debt kid

Only you can change your perspective on where you are in life right now

That, plus a giant debt, no real dreams left (I long ago realized that I am incapable of doing the stuff I like to do aka music) and an overall shit life with nothing worth living it and no sign of anything changing on the long run

Kek'd

First off. Where in the world are you?

Well I don't think alot is going to change, but hey... At least your teeth aren't rotting and you're not addicted to various kinds of drugs like some people I know...
Why wasn't music working out the way you hoped it would?

Where are you from OP?

>At least your teeth aren't rotting
Forgot that one, t-thanks

And I just can't compose music. I sit down to try to work on it and it just doesn't comes together. Last time I found myself with a month to do whatever the hell I wanted. I used that month writing music I ended with 30 seconds of stuff that I kinda liked.

Try to work as much as you can(physical work is better than sitting in an office) this way you dont have time to think about your life. And another positive effect is that you get money and if u dont need that judt send it to me

man the fuck up

If you had really given up on life you wouldn't be sitting in front of a computer asking the Internet for advice or to convince you to not kill yourself. If you really were trying to kill yourself you would have gotten some fucking tape to keep that button pressed down. The only reason you are on the Internet asking Sup Forums of all places for advice, is because you still have a bit of hope, even if it is the smallest little shred of hope. You still have hope. So yeah, all anyone can say to you is the same shit you always hear. "Man the fuck up, Get over it, it'll get worse before it gets better, it's not your fault, go travel the world." That is literally the only thing anyone else can tell you. If you need convincing, ask yourself, and I mean REALLY ask yourself. Think deep. And good luck in you future.

Wait it out my friend, I have been through some VERY severe depression myself and attempted suicide twice, nowadays I'm glad as fuck that both attempts failed though. It really doesn't feel like it, but depression really CAN end, and most likely will. You're only 17, it's possible we only live once, so don't throw the rest of your life away just because of "what if". What if not?! Trust me, I've been at rock fucking bottom but it was STILL worth it in the end. It most likely will get better user, I'd say hang in there.

Also if you got calls from "fucking everyone" when you attempted suicide doesn't that mean you have loads of friends? Loved ones? People who don't want to see you go?

>You're only 17
Did you even fucking read it?

>be 17

>fast forward to 21st birthday

Life sucks, it's unfair. Get over it. You want to kill yourself? Go ahead; I've no problem with people killing themselves. Just don't go spouting bullshit saying it's your only option.

Suidice is for faggots who can't endure pain.

Also I still want to add to what I said that for a lot of people including me the KEY was to do things constantly, even if it's work or some other boring shit like that, as long as it doesn't heavily cause more depression and it keeps you occupied, do it. The reason why is because when you're doing nothing you get time to think about shit and you automatically get depressed. When you're doing something and can only concentrate on what you're doing instead of your worries and problems, that's good. This MAY be your "honest answer" that you're looking for, but I can't guarantee that it is.

Oh right, my bad. Well in that case he's only 21, still very young.

>don't fix shit, just pretend nothing happens and the pain will go away :^)

Hey, it's better to ignore the problems if you can't fix them. Of course attempt to fix them, but if you can't at the moment, then your best course of action really is to try and ignore them for the time being. Happiness is VERY important.

if you want to die happy! go out and do some crazy shit and just kill yourself after! i would probably: go outside naked dance kiss a random hot ass slap a bitch and pull the trigger

you should try and start a clothing line and get it to be sold in zumiez alongside obey and diamond supply, you could probably make a lot of money

what a selfish and lowlife faggot.

you never volunteered a minute of your time have you? if you cant make your life good enough to stay alive, then at least live for others. make yourself useful to society.

i dont mean make money and donate to charities or work at a soup kitchen. all those assholes live off of others sympathy to get something for nothing. no one wants to work anymore.

if you can learn a useful and basic skill, there is your job and your oppurtunity to interact with strangers and make friends.

instead you sit on your pimple ass and hope for something better without even working for it.

dont wait. create.

or just kill yourself with a lot of heroin. you will die in your sleep by respiratory surpression. no pain.

Well hey man there's a lot of shit in life that gets thrown at you, you can't just sit down otherwise you'll drown in shit, you gotta just keep walking man and one day you'll find the source of that shit and end it's flow, and then it'll stop. What I'm really trying to say is that one day you'll find your purpose, and from purpose comes happines, and that day may not come soon but it will, you just gotta push and keep going man :)

OP, as someone who is going through therapy currently. It seems as though you don't want help?

You get angry when people come with ideas, you get angry when you get anti-depressants, you get angry when your psychologist asks you to try meditation.

What are you expecting that they would do? You have some problems that need fixing, anti-depressants will at least give you a slight help in that you won't be out for the day. Meditation could very well help you, are you scared to be seen as effeminate if you do it or something? Self-reflecting is awesome and basically the only way to getting better. You obviously don't want to try anything and you need to change that attitude before you can get better.

This pretty much.

I've read, that people who consume a microdosage of LSD (25 microgramm) every 3-4 days should be more active and also more happy.

Probably, it will make you more relaxed and social, and the social part is the most important: You're probably just depressed because you let your social life float away. Or how about smoking weed? Try either the LSD-microdosing shit or smoke daily a little amount of dank ass weed. Both will make you more social.

I have tried antidepresants already, and I can tell you from a lot of personal experience that they don't do shit.

I had to skip a lot of shit to make sure someone would read this, but antidepressants are not the only thing I've tried. I've tried meditation, yoga, exercise, self improvement, etc. Nothing of that works.

If I seem angry with people that "try to help" is because they always say the same crap they always do, take drugs, man the fuck up, etc etc. No one gives an honest opinion except for the people that insult me. And I know they are right.

I have social skills. The problem is that I can't find people that are worth sharing your life with. Most of the people I meet end on being some sort of asshole. I can't find people I can actually trust and enjoy their company.

>ignores meditation
You sound like a whiny bitch.

How about therapy? You need to talk about your problems. No one is depressed for no reason, if you are, it's chemical and that can be fixed. If you don't know the reason, then you need therapy all the more.

Continue to do yoga and meditation, it helps with dopamine levels and give you energy. Ask for therapy, ask for an investigation of your condition. It won't get better by itself.

As for people around you, sit down and talk to them. Make them understand how you feel when they say shit like that, if they don't understand, ditch their asses. You don't need people bringing vitriol into your life.

OP you're telling me you're too dumb to tape down the valve on the helium? Too bad you didn't succeed in offing yourself and good luck Succeeding in the future I hope you pull it off

Is there an actual reason why you're depressed? Antidepressants make you reliant btw

please take yourself out before some ham beast allows your genes into the pool

can't you get your only friend to throw some pussy your way? I mean if not her's then someone she knows? It sounds like all you need is to get laid.

>How about therapy?
Honestly, I have no idea of what that is. I've asked in my country and no one knows of any option but psychologists.
>Continue to do yoga and meditation
I meditate sometimes. It's temporal but it helps. Yoga is tiresome and I have no money for classes anymore.
>As for people around you, sit down and talk to them.
Done that, didn't work. I gave up and simply kicked most of them from my life.

Suicide is worse than where you are at now. You get punished by having your soul stuck in limbo where ever you commit it, for the duration of what would have been your normal life span.

Watch the movie "Ghost" with Demi Moore and Richard Gere. There's a guy that's stuck on a subway car. I lived in a house where there was a suicide ghost.

The single worse thing for depression in the USA is poor diet, a lot of stuff is downright toxic. Try to improve your diet and get out and enjoy nature. Go to the beach, go for a hike.

I don't talk with her anymore. Also that's not what I want. I'd like someone I could cuddle with, someone to love, someone who would love me. Otherwise I would just fuck any random drunk bitch in any random party.

If you knew how many people feel the same way.. It's life man, you're gonna have to cry yourself to sleep some days.. You're gonna be miserable for the most of your life but as far as I know the days where you're happy make up for it. Everything feels gray and nothing really makes things better currently, right? - Well it might last for quite some time until things change - They might happen on their own but it goes faster if you work for it a bit.. Find one good friend, stick to him (dont kill yourself and find a girl as a friend... you'll just fall in love, be more depressed & probably kill yourself)... Do stuff together, build a friendship probably! I think your problem is that you don't have anyone "on your own level" to talk with.. You probably see the other people in your life as some sort of burden because they "don't understand the pain" herp derp.

Hey dude you game? Like pc or ps4? Can't recommend shit to you because i don't know you and that means any advice would be empty and meaningless. If you game im up for like playing something, might help you chill.

Okey, I know how this will sound. But stay with me. A psychologist does a thing that is called therapy, there's a bunch of types. But it boils down to one thing, talking. The psychologist will ask you questions, you will answer them. They will understand what is wrong with you and force you to talk about things that hurt.. a lot. It's unpleasant while you do it, but you will feel like a million bucks afterwards.
I was super skeptic towards it at first "talking about it won't help", but it does. saying the things out loud help you get over it. You might get to do some tasks like write a letter or something and that shit helps. My dad died last year and he abused me. I thought about confronting him constantly and how much I hated him, so my psychologist said that I should write a letter where I wrote things like "I want to forgive you for..". It sounded ridiculous, but I don't even think about him anymore.

>28 don't really like life, don't really want to participate
>Make plans for suicide at age 30
>People are not comfortable with me sharing my thoughts on the subject.
>Girls don't like my lack of "ambition"
>Lose hope on Love
>Try to think of doing profound things to give the end of my life the meaning that the rest of life lacked.
>Hatch grand schemes to sequester loans and money to those that were worth a shit in short lifetime.
>Consider trying to change the things that make me upset.
>Too lazy, not worth the effort.
>Seek enlightenment. Read Bible Cover to Cover.
>Have profound experience alone in a car relating to answered prayers.
>Realize it was Cognitive bias, and also a false doctrine having not proclaimed Christ.
>Abandon it.
>Very sad, people can't understand me, try to find new ways to communicate, friends and family get scared, demand that I see a shrink.
>Shrink helps a little bit something about confidentiality.
>Head back to a more normal and balanced me but nothing really changes.
>Stuck, not really wanting to progress or participate, not really wanting to entirely cease.
>Realize that this must be limbo.
>Realize that taking action is no more noble than not taking action. The coin can be flipped either way.
>Suffering is a result of societal pressure, the perceived notions of what you should have in life give the impression that you are failing when in fact, it's your life with which to do as you please.
>Suicide is no less valid and option than World Leader.
>One could even argue that a World Leader is vain.

I only play old 1 player stuff, snes rpgs and such. Thanks anyway.

You should try ketamine

That's kinda like what my second psychologist did, but in the end he just was a literal scammer. He often looked unsure of what to do and didn't even knew basic stuff about his own tests, I bet he googled them I have no idea if there is a way to ask for a psychologist to use that method, but in public services in my country you only get like 20 mins once a month

Oh boo hoo my life is so hard im so depressed mommy never gave me enough kisses and daddy was always working wahh

Shut the fuck up and either actually kill yourself or go do something. Read a book, get a hair cut, go to the gym, quit bitching about how fucking sad you are on the internet. No one gives a fuck.

This. You've got literally nothing to lose, OP.

You deserve death. You pathetic excuse of a man. I want you to kill yourself. Bow and kowtow to some lowlife fuck on the internet. Do it you little bitch. Do exactly as I know you will.

How do you know he was a scammer? Because you could be the first case like this in a very long time? Just because he isn't perfect doesn't mean that he can't help you.

Therapy is one of the few things that will help you. Ask for a new psychologist then, and again and again and again until you get one that works for you. This shit won't go away by itself, it will only get worse.

I don't really think this to be entirely true, time is limited, and while you can pursue whatever you please weather or not it's ultimately a waste of time in the greater scheme of things will always be held in question.

Ketamine is mint, its getting legalised just wait for it then op. I found comfort in completely submerging my self in rts games.

go to africa and explore the world my friend. you'll get good memoried and fun adventures over there. also you can rob people until youre rich

OP I understand your frustrations more than anyone in this thread. Just keep going, for other people's sake. Life will pass faster than you know. We will be dead before you know it.

When your thoughts race and your chest aches... look around you.

Sorry if this doesn't make sense. I've been drinking.

It was beyond not being perfect. He was downright inept in many ways. He didn't had tact for anything he said, and never made me feel any kind of progress. He outright discussed against me about some basic chemistry stuff that I know to be true (he claimed lemon juice plus bicarbonate could help my regulate my pH if it was too acid) and seriously, he tried to sell me fucking homeopathic meds.

you should deffo kill yourself you whiney faggot

>When your thoughts race and your chest aches... look around you.

This thread just reached new levels of gay

Travelling saved my life. even if you can't go far, go somewhere new. New people and places WILL change your perspective. I promise.

>I fucking dare you to tell me suicide is not my only option

always have another option
Option1: Death
Option2: Dubs

checkem faggot

But that wasn't therapy then? Where do you live, that can't be a real psychologist? for real though, you need to find a therapist/psychologist to help you. From what I gather, you don't really want to kill yourself, you want it all to stop, and that's fine. That's good, but you need help. I have been in your position and getting REAL help changed my life.

>
>I only play old 1 player stuff, snes rpgs and such. Thanks anyway.

Shame dude. Well if you want i could offer some contact deets on like kik or w/e. I'm relatively chill so you can moan and rant all you please. Just sounds like you need someone to listen so you can sort out that mess in your head.

If not well no worries. Just find a person who has common interests and just talk to them. Sometimes just chillin and talking about random shite tends to make the world a little less crap.

dude, what medication are you on?

this is your plan:

first and foremost, fix your diet, only healty food, good carbos, good protein, vegetables and fruits, no sweets, no cakes, no candys, no mac crap, then

Chemicals needed

-low dose multivitamin everyday
-curcumin, Longvida brand (look for appropriate dosage) or BCM-95 extract (1000 mg a day), it has MAOI properties AND increases your BDNF, which is basically the mechanism of action of antidepressants, and the reason why they take 4 weeks to have an effect
-bacopa monnieri (i'm taking Planetary Herbals)
-maybe NSI-189 if you can get your hands on it (be sure it's third party tested)

Activities needed

- anaerobic exercise, you can do it at home, just start with some crunches, pushups and free squats (without barbell). Do it EVERYDAY, just half an hour will be enough for a start. You will feel like you can't make the first times, but be consistent, it's fundamental.

- moterfucking CARDIOOOOOO, start with 10 minutes a day, be consistent, increases BDNF and it's simply just as effective as an antidepressant.

You will feel better in a month, in 3 you will be smiling all the time, in 6 you will be laughing and thinking "i wanna live so bad"

source

I have took drugs, gone crazy and depressed, gone through all the medication stuff (antipsychotis, antidepressants), isolated myself, took drugs again, gone crazy and depressed again, medication again, end up alone and drained out, now i started goin to the gym and i did 10 min of cardio this morning, boy it felt like coming alive again

I would like to whole heartedly say, please do kill yourself. We have enough whiney edgelords in this world. If it is some genetic psychological problem better to nip that shit in the bud before you have some snot nosed offspring. Don't be a pussy this time, set yourself on fire, blow yourself up, shotty to the face, just something to make sure we don't see you back next week.

What do you call real help?

I've been to lots of psychologists. I've been treated with a lot of difefrent... angles, for lack of a better word. It's obvious that psychology itself its unable to help me. It's more than a coincidence.

Spit yo' game talk your shit grab your gat call your clique. Squeeze your clip hit the right one, pass that weed you got to light one, all these niggas you got to fight one, all these hoes got to like one

For me exercise and eating healthy only helped in the short run. I'm glad I still eat healthy ever since and at least I'm on a healthy weight now. I know it helps for some people so thanks.

Cognitive behavioural therapy is the only real cure for depression and anxiety you fucking autist. But I'm sure you are to much of a lazy special snow flake for it to work for you.

Are you a psychologist? There's that defeatist attitude again, that need to change if you're gonna get better. You are definitely not alone in feeling this way and people that are worse off than you have gotten help. Just because you don't think it will work, doesn't make it so. Real help is someone that sits you down, comes up with a plan to help you, figure out WHY you're depressed and then make you talk about it. Getting laid once won't help you, doing drugs won't help you, figuring out WHY you're depressed and getting over that will help.

Go travel around the world. There's a thing called couchsurfing where you can stay at someones house 1 night for free. You meet people and see many beautifull things. You can also stay at some places if you want and work there to stay for a while.
It will help you find yourself again.

Here is what you do:

Stop looking for a meaning in everything, life doesn't have a meaning and just do shit that makes you happy. Read a book, play guitar.

While you are doing that, force yourself to go for a run, running or excercising in general is a good way to increase dopamine, adrenaline and burn some calories and sugar.

Change your mindset, this is hard. Instead of asking why bad shit happens to you, or sob because it happened, here's what you do:

Whenever you get angry, ask yourself why it happened thr way it happened, not just to hou but in general. Relate the fuck out of that event, take a step back, and see the whole picture.

Once you are able to do this, go another step further. Analyze everything you come across, you'll find that things you perceive are bad are relatively not that bad.

Once you have achieved this mindset, go to the last step, which is dont giving a fuck. Oh something bad happened? It happened because of this and thia, it has affected this and this also. And i dont care and move on

This way you get in shape, learn to not care and be happier in general

Might sound gay because it rhymed unintentionally. But everyone here is in Sup Forums mode so it's hard to talk about things like depression and suicide without being called faggot. Because feelings are ultra gay and should be avoided because manly. At least I tried putting words together at all instead of telling him to kill himself like everyone else. But I spose it doesn't matter because it's b. Should get back to telling faggots to check em.

...

you need to be constantly exercising, it has to be like a life philosophy, not a cure, it will keep you in a good mental and physical state, it's essential, everybody should do it, you expecially

> Want to kill himself
> use helium
> i can't die /b

pathetic

That's not the point you little bitch. Death is no longer an obstacle. Go buy a pocket pistol in case things go to shit and you really do need to end it, then go do something. No one can really tell you what, just do something you wouldn't normally do.

Broscience: The Post

"Honest opinion"?? Like wtf do you expect people to say? You sound like you're waiting for ome kind of miracle advice that will instantly heal you, but that's not the way it works, man. Meditation, yoga, excercise, drugs, work etc. are the universally proven ways of overcoming shit states of mind, but it is UP TO YOU to overcome it, no one will do it for you. YOU only can learn how to manipulate your mental energy (=attention), which you seem like you have absolutely no control over. If you utterly realize that only YOU are the creator of your fate, only YOU can turn your life around ANYTIME, if you have debt then go work some physical work somewhere - it'll take your mind off things, you'll meet new people and get you in shape (possibly).
You ask for help but refuse every help you get. Now it's only up to YOU, no faggots on Sup Forums can help you

this may seem dumb buttt, anime got me over my depression. find some good anime like clannad after story or your lie in april. gather all the things in life you find intersting and search a anime for it. just tryin to help out

You don't even suceed to hero go jump from a cliff or buy a gun faggot.

clearly you're just a fuckin attention seeking bitch, I fuckin know your type as well, turn down any advice from anyone because you tried things once and they didn't work out, I mean to completely disregard meditation....I hope that wasn't because you associate it with religion! anyway my point is, you're a pathetic "want every answer handed to me" "feel sorry for my white privileged problems" "self/google diagnosed" piece of shit. kill yo self

Everyone in this thread is a little bitch, fucking just kill yourself op

get out me hive

Either become a christian and make connections in church meet good people who will help you
Or
Sh00t a skool

I'm starting to think OP is just a really boring guy and this whole thread, like his life, is a cry for attentiin because he doesn't have the ability to command it in any other way.

He claims he's 'tried it all' but he's probably only dipped his toe in waters and retracted when he doesn't see instant results.

OPs failed attempt at suicide was unconcious sabotage, he doesnt really want to die. He just wants acceptance but is blockading himself constanlty on building the basic foundations of a better life. Problems like debt sit there with loathing but no action to fixing it.

OP, I have diagnosed you with Millenial Syndrome.

OP here. Since no one has bothered to give me any REAL advice with this thread hitting page 5, I will be killing myself in a couple days time.