Tell Sup Forums your family secret. Is your uncle a pedo? Does your grandma have a gambling problem...

Tell Sup Forums your family secret. Is your uncle a pedo? Does your grandma have a gambling problem? Is your dad having an affair? Your brother in jail for murder?

Secrets that the whole family knows about but no one ever talks about it.

I'm the only one who knows apart from my dad's parents.

>Dad used to be a player back in the old county
>When his parents would go to church or funerals he'd bring home bitches to fuck
>Neighbor would rat him out
>He got his ass whooped when they got back

Mom's having an affair

I'm the only one in the family who knows

How did you find out?

My family secret is that i go on Sup Forums

my dad knows where Jimmy Hoffa is buried.

Me too. Sucks ass

>Be me
>Start talking to and old chieldhood friend
>"Gimme a Massage" she says
>Ending up having wild sex
>Never say no to a massage.

My aunt was abducted, raped and left naked in NY when she was 15. My father was shot in the face (lived). My uncle was killed for getting involved with mafia and went missing for 10 years only to be dug up behind a mall three years ago. One of my cousins is a serial killer in jail for life. Another has been hospitalized multiple times for eating disorders. My mom actually believes my family is cursed. Another one of my cousins died in a car accident at 14 (no he wasn't driving). My other uncle is a mechanic and had a car fall on him (lived). My sister was killed after being abducted at 10. It's Sup Forums so I don't expect you to take me on my word for all this but if I provide proof it puts my identity at risk. Believe more or not you asked for my family story so here it is.

>dad was a coke dealer
>mom is an addict
>pedo uncle who no one speaks too
>dads mother commited suicide with a toaster in the bathtub 2 days after i was born
>dad knocked up moms sister so my half sister is also my cousin
>moms father committed suicide with a car in the garage when i was 5
>moms mother committed suicide with an oxy overdose when i was 9
>3 uncles in jail for attempting to rob a bank
family reunions are weird as fuck

How many people did your cousin kill?

Not entirely sure my family never went into that much detail just told me he was in jail for life.

Did they catch your sisters murderer?

my grandma was 9 when she married my grandfather who was 40. He had already been married before but his old wife died. anyway she was always sort of in love with him and i never realized how creepy it must have seemed until i realized how young 9 years old was. she also had her first kid at age 12 and 9 more kids after that

Found out about 3 years ago when I picked up the other line (we still have a house phone). Heard her talking to some guy, and well yeah. Saw deleted texts after that, followed her after work, etc

It honestly hurt to see that my mom would do such a thing when I found out

No they stopped looking after a while. I was young so I didn't follow the case.

My Uncle killed himself in very suspicious circumstances. I think he must have been a pedo, but no-one in the family will talk about it.

>dad apparently was a stud, got my mom and some other chick pregnant at the same time, probably why I've never met him
>grandpas side of family apparently had lots of incest between cousins and brothers and sisters
>also supposedly owned plantation back in the day on grandpas side (this was Georgia)
>one of my second cousins was a webcam model, amateur pornstar, and a stripper
>one of my other second cousins was molested be her father for years

>my grandmas sister lost my grandma, her daughter, her husband and her little dog all within a year
Also this ones not a secret, just really shitty

Was your dad called Muhammed?

My 60 y/o dad is dating my 30 y/o cousin (on my mothers side) Just found out she was adopted but she grew up with me as a cousin. Nearly drove my mom insane.

I'm a sex addict and it's always felt like it wasn't my fault...didnt have sex till I was 16, loved drugs more than pussy...then I found out my grandma on my dad's side was a whore and my great grandma on my mom's side was too....seems retarded but I feel like it's somehow the reason for my debauchery

Did you ever engage her services or is she no longer working?

My mom has a feminine penis

my uncle is gay
i looked at his search history and found gay porn
i plan on fucking him at chistmas bc im bi

Why did they commit suicide?

Also mostly empty, apparently.

uncle - that was married into the family

I'm the only male in my family on my fathers side that hasn't an hero'd. Grandfather, father, brother, nephew. Very scary

My dad smokes pot. Exciting I know.

been on 4 chan for 5 minutes


what is an hero'd

grandma on my dads side was on a ton of psych meds and depressed, grandpa on my moms side lost every dime he had on the stock market and his company went under within 2 weeks of each other, he couldnt deal and would leave everyday and pretend to go to work so he didnt have to tell my grandma they were poor, and she OD'd because she couldnt handle being poor after being fairly wealthy her entire life

U have my sympathies

Calling bs on that shit

Had a benign tumor in my colon that made it to where I wasn't toilet trained till I was 16ish after it was removed whole family knew but ignored it until it became serious

nah, all of my uncles had a ton of kids, 3 aunts.. one of which had 13 kids who now have 2-3 year olds. its just a fucked up array of people left

U got that right. Massage is code word

Have you considered going on Google scholar to look up the case?

When my mother dies I felt nothing.

jacob?

My aunt's husband is a DEA officer.
He stole some LSD from lock up and he and my aunt dropped it and went to a concert.

I hope your uncle goes to jail and gets raped for his hypocrisy.

committed suicide
Now gtfo summerfag

I used to have a twin brother but he died as a fetus

Pretty sure uncle 1 is a porn addict, I have no proof just a suspision. Uncle 2 is an alcoholic in a divorce and uncle three is dieing from colon cancer due to lifelong smoking. Uncle 1 also dumpster dives at retail stores to find thrown out overstock, he saves a ton of money doing that shit.

I've never heard of that. Might look into it. My family hates him so much they never even told me his first name so I'd have to ask but sounds like it could shed so light.

My sister is a drug dealer

get evidence and blackmail her into fucking you

This

no. this is my grandad. and he died pretty young in his 60s from a heart attack after his son(my uncle) died in an accident when he was 18.
My grandma always told good stories about him though and it never seemed rapey or weird. They built a house together, bought a lot of farmland and became huge aristocrats

How long do you think you got left to live?

You should probably tell your dad. I wouldn't want to be living a lie of a marraige

It was my father's grandmother who hid the horseradish in my grand uncle's cake

English?

Idk my dad and uncle made it out fine. Hopefully I can too. It's gonna be a long road if my family tree is any insight as for what's to come.

he is my dads brother
no wife or girlfriend

They really do that? Thought it was a myth. Thought they send it to discounters. Is this for food?

> father conned ~$25,000 from about 5 people then when we found out he skipped the country.

>Mother is a drug dealer. Mostly to other upperclass families in the area but she REALLY doesn't look it. She looks more like Chloe Mortez but 39&w/wrinkles

> youngest brother drinks all the liqueur in cabinet and replaces it with nontoxic cleaning agents and water. Mother thinks they just taste odd or aged badly (not big on alcohol)

> oldest brother constantly cuts. Depressed af on the inside happy and calm straight B student on the outside. Long talks together confides a lot of his truffles with me.

>Sister was A grade up until 7th grade day one in high school closet whore. Sucking and fucking her way to the top of her classes both students and teachers. Found out shes Done 5 classes in her year level 1 bellow and 3 above. Half the school has fucked my sister and like 1/4 of the staff according to what her grades are like. I know shes definitely blown 3 teachers and maybe 5 more.

Be me only one in family C to B student shit social life no drugs straight edge. Normal fag aside from gore addition online.

I don't want to fuck her

i molested almost every cousin in my family on both sides, it was great

>and they were also muslim

Black mail the teachers who fucked your sister to get good grades.

No plenty of places throw food away, they're scared of sending it to food banks and getting sued. You know, cause of all the high-priced lawyers hobo's have.

I had a lumpy wumpy in my poopy place that made me not able to poopy woopy until i was 16

so youre letting your bro kill your mom. Must feel nice.

My great aunt gouged the eyes out of black people for years. Another great aunt went bat shit crazy, locked herself in her room and ate her fingers.

My dad is a guinea pig for the philippine government. He's the scapegoat that most politicians use to corrupt money

Ayy Muslim friend !

My aunt is addicted to painkilllers and has posted on backpage as an escort and for sensual massages before.
I'm not sure if my family knows - they know about her addiction (and various treatment) but i haven't talked about the rest with anyone, including my aunt.
The last time I saw her on backpage was about six months ago. I'm sure she posts other places and likely recently, but it's not like i've been searching around very hard either.

She's a very nice woman but has had a lot of chances to un-fuck up her life, so it sort of sucks.

My dad has a mental illness, my mother is one of the stupidest persons I know and I'm graduating from medical school in a few months.
I hate my family and pretty much, myself

RE: non-toxic
non.
non-toxic

Ask your uncle for tips and make a new thread about dumpster diving. I want to learn, this sounds lucrative

...

funny my uncle IS a pedo

We have a long history of severe mental illness. Several suicides. One was my brother.

We don't mention him.

My nanna is addicted to prescription painkillers from her back injury, and so is her husband, because why not.
My grandma is addicted to gambling, and attempts suicide every few months on average.
May aunty is autistic, and her brother accidentally got her raped, and now she doesn't trust anyone.

My mum killed herself when I was 16, and my dad has been an alcoholic ever since

>wow this imported swiss blue Wendyx wine is fabulous, the after taste accents the citrusy burn you feel from the fermented oranges and the bléché

grandpa fancy local lawyer and politician sexually abused his daughter my mom. they all venerate him despite knowing.

My family secret is that long ago in a galaxy far far away I put everything in whole wide world inside your mother's pussy.

My dads a drunk, my mom suffers from an extreme case of country side sickness. She was a gold digger and i was born before they got married. She is a pathological liar and will say anything to get peoples approval and humilate someone along the way. She thinks she is a classy lady but underneath all her pretty clothes there is a big pile of shit and envy. Nobody in my family even believes her anymore, last year she stole 100k from my dad and spent like 40 on clothes and the rest just "vanished" and keep in mind we live in a cheap af country.

WHo are you

my grandmother recieved electroshock therapy when my dad was 4 years old. when she got anesthesia induced dementia a couple years ago, she kept asking us to not let them give her "that" surgery, which probably meant a lobotomy.

Your mom probably knows about it too

You sound like my untold half of the story, save for the pretty clothes . My mother's so dumb she cam barely wipe her own ass. Dad's schizophrenic and has severe cognitive impairment

Last week tonight, huh?

Uncle got murdered for being a rich fuck and owning a diamond mine in South Africa.

>Uncle pedo (married into family), tho not confirmed pedo
>Aunt ran daycare
>Herd rumors he was taking pictures of the boys (He is disabled, not mentally)
>Aunt shut down daycare, seemingly on a whim
>Aunt talks deep to my mother, says "There's a place in heaven. Even for people like Uncle."
>He always creeped me out as a kid.
>Never did anything to me except try to bully me. Didn't work.

I've got a drug addict cousin whose mom is completely enabling him and actively sabotages attempts from the rest of the family to help him. Literally took him in and took him to sign up for rehab and all was looking good til she showed up and handed him $200. He literally made a call and disappeared for three days before showing up back at her home. I think she is snorting half of what he brings home.

My grandma has a very private property and she willingly harbors my uncle, who has warrants for god knows how many crimes and is producing and using illegal substances in broad daylight there. Ironically, my uncle thinks the above is a scumbag and wants nothing to do with him.

My mother is schizo.

My brother and his girlfriend are the equivalent of crazy cat people, but with multiple species and have zero sense of responsibility to any of them once they get the animal home.

My dad left my mom after giving things a shot for a long time but eventually my family was the straw that broke the camels back, not my mothers mental illness.

I am severely depressed.

no my grandpa was jewish, and my grandma christian. but middle eastern area

>Tell Sup Forums your family secret. Is your uncle a pedo? Does your grandma have a gambling problem? Is your dad having an affair? Your brother in jail for murder?
>Secrets that the whole family knows about but no one ever talks about it.
I do really want to suck a cock and make someone cum on my mouth. My family is extremely homophobic

My stepdaughter is a slut. Everyone knows but pretends they don't.

Chuckled

My uncle was a high school art teacher, and he fucked one of his students. He's divorced from my aunt now. Nobody ever talks about it in the family. It was so hard on my dad, he's the only responsible one in the family and really cares about all his brothers, it's been awful watching him be in pain about my uncle being such an evil person.

I think I do have a pedo uncle. We had a birthday party at our house for my little brother and my uncle got drunk as shit. He kept staring at an 11 year old girl's ass. To be fair she did have a fat ass for her age, she looked like she was 16 from behind. Anyway, whole family noticed and started talking shit about him.

How old is she?

My mom's ex husband was some sort of teacher (never met him they got divorced long before I was born). Heard he fucked a student, got fired, and is now addicted to crack.

Posted this not too long ago but
I was around 3 or so and me a relative would play with each other's dick and ass when we were alone at night. It was nothing sexual really idk why we did it but we did. As we got older 8 or so we would kiss and play with our dicks together. It eventually led up to us sucking each other's dicks and putting our dicks in each other's ass. It stopped when we were about 10, idk why. I can never get it out of my head either.

I take it in the ass all the time

>Dads an alcoholic and haven't seen him since I was 15
>Moms addicted to gambling and in denial
>Grandma smokes 3 packs a day and has had 3 face lifts
>Grandpa was dishonorably discharged from military and became a biker

This is an actual picture of my Uncle

19 now. Been a slut since she was 13. Very fucked up kid. Not really my problem so I just ignore it and get on with my life.