Be me 22

>be me 22
>haven't had sex or been with a girl for 18 months
>mostly due to the realization that most girls are shit and isn't worth the trouble
>also got fat since I stopped trying to meet girls
>not lonely or anything tho
>have good friends
>work at a supermarket
>me and female colleague are changing the garbage disposal container
>she climbs halfway down the container to reach some lever
>shitmanidonnu
>she really short tho
>she grabs my hand not to fall in
>mfw insta boner at point of contact
>wtf.png

tfw I realize how long it's been since a girl willingly touched me.

Any more pathetic losers out there?

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>Virgin
>19
>Just got gf.
>Every time we've tried to fuck I couldn't get it up.
>Kill me.

just don't make it into some huge deal, sex is nothing special really. Is she a virgin to?

Girl I've liked since I was 12 (I'm 21 now, she's three months older) who I thought has been giving me signs for years rejected me when I asked her out for drinks second semester of college. Haven't really chased any girls since.

No, she's not a virgin. I feel bad though because she really really really wants to have sex. I'm indifferent on the matter, I don't really care about sex that much. But I do want to make her happy.

Me and my first gf had trouble having sex at first when we were 15. She was too tight and I was afraid of hurting her. Just give it time tho and eventually it will work.

Well are you at least making her happy in other ways then? It's not all about the love stick you know

>virgin
>19
>basement dweller with no social life

rank in cs?

What you dont even want to smash your gf? You just want to make her happy? Wow okay srsly everyday i wake up I wanna smash.

Obviously I'm making her happy in other ways or else she wouldn't still be with me. She'd been raped and abused in the past, I've been there for her and she loves me. She also makes me feel loved and happy. Not to mention that when I ate her out she had her first orgasm ever. I just feel bad knowing that I can't give her what she wants.

Do you fap regularly?

N/A

>lost my vcard at 22
>only had sex with three women
>had sex with each of said women thousands of times

I never went out of my way for sex and just wait till the girl comes to me, dry spells of 2 to 3 years inbetween each girl. Didnt really care.

literally me, except that I'm 21

and she's such a goddamn cutie too.
I've fingered her to orgasm every time, but I'm afraid that she will leave me over this

>She'd been raped and abused in the past

user, run.

Man why don't you faggits want sex fuck is the animal kingdom fucked up or something come on do you guys need to take viagra or somethin?

Once every few days. Currently haven't fapped in 3 days. Tried to have sex yesterday.

most girls don't know what they want guy. Also not sure about the rape bit, usually a warning sign.

Way too much investment for short term reward.

Come on man your gf can love you and you can still fuck her brains out.

Got laid at 15 and I'm GE kek

Most men like you are a looser to begin with. Nothing in life is easy, including pussy. If you don't work towards getting some ass then you will always be that guy that doesn't get any. So stop feeling sorry for your self and go get laid.

Haha I got laid when i was 19 but im still happy cause I beat my older bro by 2 years

Try going for a couple of weeks.
Don't be afraid to cum too soon, tell her you probably won't last long. Turns out women don't mind it, if it doesn't happen every time.

I know, I know. But she doesn't seem to be off the deep end.

Good luck my Sup Forumsro.

Stop fapping and buy boner pills at hodji convenient stores or gas stations. They're just as good as cialas.

Well sex only gets better the more you do it with someone. Me and my first gf fucked way over 1000 times the 2-3 years we were together and that shit was cash. Never really gone out of my way either to get sex but managed to stumble onto a bunch of girls who wanted the D and holy shit it's not even close to as good when you do it once or twice with someone.

fuck one girl 1k times > fuck 1k girls one time

I wasn't in any rush. I wasn't even looking to get laid at 15, it wasn't a concern at all. I just got lucky in a party.
Been fucking ever since though.

Y'all guys should just stop wacking off for at least 5 days and tell me you can't have sex after that.

>But she doesn't seem to be off the deep end.

This is because you are still young and stupid, youll learn soon enough. Sorry user, every guy goes through it at least twice.

Will try.

If getting laid was as easy as breathing and walking, you would still find a reason not to do it. You're just a lazy fuck.

did we ask for your opinion cuntface?

Sure, problem for me is though, I don't really enjoy any part of it except for the orgasm. Maybe it's the condoms or my gf just doesn't put enough effort into it. But pumping, handjobs and blowjobs mostly feel bland or uncomfortable.
> tell your gf what you like
I like to be done in a short amount of time so I can focus on other things. Now bringing her to orgasm, I happily spent time on that, cause she seems to enjoy it a lot.

pictureswap.herokuapp.com

From talking here and to my friends, Ive heard the same from allot of people. I think it also helps the women are attractive, its not like im fucked two whales and a midget or anything.

Plus after awhile you get them to do anything basically and vice versa. Never experienced a dead fish.

Man you sound super duper beta pick it up man or you'll soon be cooking for her apolgising to her and being a little bitch.

Probably, although some people might argue it's about efficiency.

Exactly man these faggits dont even want sex like are they gay?

I'm quite conservative, and just calculated chance of finding woman i would like to be with.
there would be less than 3k of them in my whole country.
It's kind of, like, not too much if miracle don't happen.

Is the fact that I think like above enough to get me to pathetic train?

Potential cuck here

He probably is a cuck dont even give him the benefit of the doubt.

> cooking
Way too late for that insult mate, I enjoyed cooking long before I enjoyed sex.

Have you started practicing how to prep a bull?

Dude its not an insult its a serious problem. My brother was a little bitch and he ended up giving his entire life savings to some bitch who ended up dumping him anyways. Don't think that just cause you worked so hard for someone they gonna magically pay you off in the end. People invenstments dont work. Stick to money srs.

My gf is pretty fun, sex whenever I want. I still cheat on her with her friend.

No. But since most of you don't have enough testosterone in you to go find and conquer some pussy, I figured I'd lay my cock on the table to see who would be the first to jump on it. Congratulations. Now kindly remove my schlong from your mouth so that I can sashay to another thread.

Have tried have sex with her three times on three seperate timesand I haven't mastuebated since two days before. After that my balls hurt like shit and I had to fap. Cam like never before in my live.
I'm pretty sure it's psychological :^(

Two days wow fuck that's so long. FUck me

80% of sex is psychological. Get some viagra, seriously. Go to the doctor and tell him your issue. Then the bones will come.

Nope, never even heard mention anything in that direction, on the contrary. I fucked more people than she has during our relationship.
Still seems like a lot of effort, not too mention I have to deal with people like you guys for not having sex the right way.
You guys are funny.
That's weird, I must be dreaming about all the new shit she bought for us once she started work.
> inb4 I'm still a student, so no I don't pay for all her shit

All together 5 days and after 3 make-out Sessions and a lot of cockteasing I was pent up as fuck

Well ofc you have to find the person attractive. But what really made it gr8 for me and my first gf was that we were not afraid of being nasty/dirty. We weren't prude at all. We just loved to fucked and found different ways to do it as enjoyable as possible. She had no problem getting my spunk all over her body and I had no problem fucking her on her period etc. Now when i think back it was kinda nasty, but that was what made it good to us.

Most girl I've been with after her have all had some things they dislike about sex which ruins the whole thing. Some people don't like oral, some don't even like handjobs. My second gf was rubbish, she didn't want anything else than my funk junk inside her. She didn't want me to finger her or have any foreplay what so ever. She just wanted to feel grownup and tell her friends she was having sex. She didn't even try to enjoy it.

So basically morale of the story is that if you find someone who loves to fuck you she's a keeper. I'd rather have a girl with no common interests but with whom I can finnish simultaneously with after 5 min than someone who don't enjoy sex.

Wow Okay all it takes is a kiss and my woody is up and dandy

Smoke some weed before sex. That will get you relaxes enought so you can get a boner. Trust me.

lol I'm not the biggest fan of blowjobs either but I still have gotten more bj's and more pussy than you will in your pathetic life guy.

So you'd rather spent 95% of your time with someone you dislike, just because she can bring you to orgasm in the remaining 5%?
I wonder how long your relationship will last.

No mangalang there's a lot of spunk going on in my junk matey

>calculating possibilities of meeting a girl
the autism, gee

...

25 y.o hasn't had sex in 3 years 8 months due to heartbreak and lack of will.

Meet amazing and seksi girl hit it off fool around heavily and she severs connection after 2nd time hanging out.

Mfw all the girls I'm attracted to are either true bipolar, recovering heroin addict or of a similar ilk

It's tough out here being a codependent hopelessromantic fag

Thanks b

>26
>Single
>Shit minimum wage job
>Have not had any serious relationships since 2008

...

So you're either 14 or some twat who believes getting blowjobs and having ONS makes you good at fucking?

also
>If you let sex (aka women) have that much power over your life then you're a cuck

That's what everyone says when they're not getting any.

Got any more to this erotic fiction?

Seriously, don't stop now it was just getting good.

Also describe her.

>20
>Virgin, not kissless tho
>Best friends ex girlfriend introduces me to one of her best friends
>She's 2 years older than me
>Never asked about prior relationships, est~ 3-4
>Date her for a while
>After about 4 dates I finally spend the night at her house
>Make out, she says I taste sweet, feels good
>Suck tit for first time, love it
>Date some more
>Finally fuck, we're 5 months in
>Blows me awake every morning
>Start talking a little less for some reason
>Realize I hadn't seen her in almost nearly 2 weeks
>Whatever
>2 months later I figure it's done
>Best friends ex hates me because she says I broke her heart
>Wuuuuuuuuuuuuut
>Best friends ex fucked two of our friends
>Shouldn't have been a cunt to my best friend, bitch

NOTE: Apparently, girls don't like it when you fuck em for 3 months straight and don't talk to them ever again.

You all have no idea what it's like to be a loser and not have sex. Try both of those PLUS have little control over the good money you make.

I'm married.

Good perspective. Girls and guys with weird hangups (lile oral or period etc) are a waste of time.

since when did I say I would dislike the person? I said "someone with no common interests", that doesn't necessarily mean dislike in any way. My first gf was some hippie girl with weird ass hobbies, and I was playing in a band etc. We liked each other tho. What I'm saying is that I'd rather have fucking as a common interest than both liking Sup Forums or some stupid shit like that.

lol, get on my level scrub. 8 years since a girl willingly touched me

Killing unborn children on your sheets doesn't really count guy.

Willingly
Wow ok

ouch

Lulz, trying to shame a man for preparing food for his loved ones, did you even try?

it's all about daring to breathe deep while you do it, i can bet thousands that you are breathing only into your chest. get that diaphragm working and "breathe into your balls" and you will be diamonds.

>inb4 rapist
it's just too much dicking around for me, i see bitches mirin and wanting to grind in clubs tho + shy af

Well since I acted like you are when I was 14 and didn't get any I would beg the differ. If you had real good sex with someone you don't give two fucks about some stupid ass pussy hunt.

>A good girl is worth a thousand bitches
Kanye, da lyrical genius

Man dont be tryna go to the gamma level matey

I can verify this, also she will be more into it if she smoked some weed.

Just don't obliterate yourself

Guys don't count, this is a thread about a heterosexual issue.

She's like really short, like 150 cm, blonde and skinny. She's one of those girls where you can't tell her age. She could be 17 or she could be 38. Kinda freaky.

Can greentext some good stories in another thread later. Have loads of good crazy stories

Man all these faggits need to go to the gym and lift weights. Nobody gets problems like these after lifting weights srs.

chicken dinner?

...

I bet you think earning a decent amount of money to provide for your family and making sure your kids are raised right is cuckish to?

Nice try kid.

actually had some bj's from guys as well, also given a few.
>not gay

Whats ouch about it? Sex is fun, and already 'dirty'. If your afraid of a little period blood or the taste of vagina your probably not worth dealing with. Goes in reverse as well.

Sounds like my year 12 science teacher Tess Richardson, she was 22 years old and smoking hot. First time I ever got anything lower than a B in science.

Man now you're just mixing milk with water dud. I just said you're a bitch because you being a bitch. Nothing wrong about cooking food but there is a line. And that line has been crossed.

The most vivid and intimate sex dreams I have are about the love I had in high school. I haven't been with anyone besides her and I am nearly 24 now.. I don't know what it could mean

Again, guys don't count.
Sex from a dude is like water from the sea.

>lurk more b4 posting guy

This isn't the school yard, noone is impressed mate, on yer bike.

Not 14, but 44 with years of experience. One thing I've learned is that you don't sit around bitching about what you don't have or have lost, you get up, keep moving to the next. Coming to this site to look a porn should inspire most of you to want to go out and get laid but instead you're you would rather complain about your of pussy getting.

...

...

Buy viagra from a dealer. Or get some supplements that promote libido. There's some out there

well this is going nowhere, just like your pointless efforts of getting that pussy.

Wise sage.