Retarded super power thread go

retarded super power thread go

ultra fast aging

acid tears

Communicate with fruit.

you can seduce hats

invisible handwriting

cant increase the strength of your muscles but your bones become adversely weaker

can

Change skin colour but only slightly

the power to liquify your forehead

Laughing gas farts.

Make a gf appear out of thin air

The ability to make 650,000 of Hillary Clinton's emails appear out of a sex crime investigation into her top aide's soon to be ex-husband.

summon a lamp, once

Able to speak to cats. Though the little fuckers can't understand a word because... cats.

Have slightly better than average smelling

The ability to turn invisible except your genitals

invisible handwriting

Invincible to really rare diseases

Can change into any criminal on the top 10 most wanted list.

On Sup Forums a really rare disease would be HIV since neckbeards never get laid.

>That's a useful superpower for a neckbeard

Can spontaneously decay parts of only your own body

So you could commit ANY crime you want and someone else gets the criminal charges?

HOW IS THAT A USELESS POWER???

mfw I've had a superpower all along whoa.png

Depression

Classic:
Being immune to the 7th bullet hitting you in succession.

Can't change back though.

peel fruit with your mind, but only when it's unripe

Can I get plastic surgery after with the millions I get robbing banks for a few days?

>implying you have the know how to aquire millions and get away with it

what would be the fucking point in changing into a wanted criminal then???

The power to heat up any ketchup within 10 feet radius