ITT: your last happy day

ITT: your last happy day.

And I'm talking about a full day. waking up and being happy before remembering who/what you are doesn't count.

What is this "Happy" you speak of?

you just had to remind me of how miserable i am huh op

Too far back to remember. As long as I've been socially conscious, I've known life was going to be hell.

today! slept in, gonna have a quick fap, then going out looking for a new place since my lease is almost up. hope you feel better :)

pro-tip: quit being a lazy degenerate if you want to be happy you fucking faggot, work harder pussy

I was a young boy. I didn't realize my mother was a psychopath, I had no idea how heartless the seemingly most innocent people can truly be. I had no concept how horrible everything can hurt. I had no understanding that loneliness actually a real thing and couldn't possibly comprehend why someone could feel completely alone around a group of people close to them. I hadn't yet been molested and I wasn't facing death in my dreams every night. I didn't know PTSD was even a thing and thought a flashback was something involving a light not a horrific memory of a time I had almost died. I miss being happy. I miss it so much... But all I can do is keep pretending I'm happy with who I have become.

ITT: people who should kill themselves but aren't even good enough for that

>work harder
These kind of people aren't happy most of the time.

About 9 years ago.
Was driving home from work around 10ish listening to the radio. Didn't have a care in the world. Just remember dozing off then waking up. Was told I was in a collision with a tractor trailer. Lost my right leg and was in coma for 4 months.

Last sunday. Being bipolar owns

post pic of your stump

I think the last time was about 4 days before I was born.

my last 'happy' day was when i realised i wanted to kill somebody, not create a scene or have a collection, just feel a feeling of drowning a persons last breaths, hmmm it makes me soo fucking horny.

huh, worked for me!

I was borderline anorexic, addicted to the internet/video games (still kinda am) and addicted to sugar. Was going through a 12 pack of soda ever 1.5 days and smoking over a pack a day. Lived for free with my childhood friend turned drug dealer so had no real ambition or intention on making money. He got arrested and I had to go out on my own.

Went on the job hunt and found a decent manual labor job in 2 days. Lived in my car and off my credit card i never used prior until my first few paychecks, got my own apt. Cut the sugar out of my diet, limited my internet/video game use while not at work. Work forced me to adopt a healthy sleep schedule, another big contributing factor to my depression.

2 years later and I've quit my manual labor job, started working for myself making more money.

What brought me here? I was lazy whiney sack of shit. I felt sorry for myself constantly. Treated my body like shit. Hard work. It was a lot of hard work. To quit the shitty diet, cigarettes, quit wasting my days away racking up pointless video game clout. It was really hard. Really hard work.

So yeah, work hard faggot. No one is gonna hold your hand. Life sucks and only the strong survive. I thought I was doomed because I was just a depressed person, but then I busted my ass, worked hard.

Worked for me.

You might see some results if you quit crying on the internet about how hard "hard work" is and stop throwing it to the side thinking all your problems are gonna be solved by you sitting on your ass with your brain that you put under absolute minimal strain rots away.

...

Probably some time around a few months ago. But it could have been last week too. I have a hard time remembering anything that happened past a day ago without pictures. It also feels as if yesterday could have been ages ago.

I don't give two fucks about your life story, bro. I just said some people aren't happy even with hard work paying off.

January 13, 1990

I had forgotten that feeling, all until last June...

I really don't know what happened, but one day, out of nowhere, I woke up with energy. I was hungry, and was looking forward for the day.
I went to work in the factory, and I was making jokes with people and I was constantly smiling.

They REALLY thought I was on some drugs, and some of them asked me what was going on. I just said I drank coffee.

Then I came home, it was still sunny outside so I wanted to go run outside, in the park, so I put my sport short and shoes. When I came out, it hit me so HARD...

I actually noticed how everything was bright. I could actually see the grass, the sky the flowers clearly... because with depression, it all appears so grey.

I was really shocked, believe me. I didn't even think that feeling was remotely possible, because I haven,t felt it for more than 10 years. I remember telling myself "so that's what it feels like to be normal" jesus fucking christ!

I could also notice the warm wind caress my skin (I know this sentence sounds really gay, but that's EXACTLY how it felt) and the air was just fresher.

When I started running, I was surprised to see that it was WAY WAY less "painful" than all the previous times. It was flowing like butter, because I my mind was full of positive thoughts.

Now, the positive thoughts came naturally, I didn't force them on myself. I was just thinking about what to jokes to say to the co-workers... what to tell them to impress them... how I could improve myself... which books to read to start my own business... and stuff like that.

All was positive. It REALLY felt weird. And the best, is that I had so much energy... like I was on some drugs or something. I didn't feel tired at all, and I was looking to do stuff. Read, laugh, study, etc.

The day after, unfortunately, it was gone... I was back to the old depression, with no motivation, no appetite, no energy, etc. At least that one day reminded me of what it feels like to be normal.

everyday. i honestly cant remember the last time i was sad. most of the time im feeling great, some of the time im just ok.

June 3rd 2016

The day before my birth.

Greentext?

Hahah i like

Continued here, because I lacked words.

So the day before, I tried to remember what I ate and what I did to trigger that feeling of happiness...

I remember that I drank some no-name Diet soda and also some Magnesium effervescent tablet the day before.But I have don't things other days too, without any effect.

So I went online, and read that sweeteners can affect your brain and that Magnesium can affect depression or something like that. But even if it did, why didn't I feel the effects the last 10-20 times I had drunk these things?

I have no idea.

But, I can tell you one thing...

I have literally no good memories since I was 13 (I'm now 23, and 24 in a few months) The only good memories I remember are before 13 when I got depression... then there's NOTHING.

There's only that one day I wrote about above. That's it. No other good memories.

The brain only saves the GOOD MEMORIES... so if you're depressed, it just wipes out most of the stuff, because it doesn't trigger any positive response in the brain.

Sad shit.