How do I get away with murder

How do I get away with murder.

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youtube.com/watch?v=iSYCh0NuBuY
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Easy you don't do it

kill yourself

I can see you didn't understand the question,

Not interested in suicide.

Keep a get out of jail free card in your wallet and you'll be a-ok user

Please be serious.

>how do i get away with murder

Easy, don't get caught

Easy you don't do it

No I understand, I meant hire someone else to do it

Its all about witnesses so remeber to close your eyes while youre commiting it, if no one sees, it didnt happen.

I mean ways to not get caught.

I want to be the one that murders.

Please be more serious.

easy, dont get caught

Alibi with no motive or Witnesses and somehow you have to figure out how to dispose of a body (harder than you would think) in such a way it'll never be found. Oh and don't go posting shit on the internet

kill a heroin user

...

OP is an edgy faggot

Easy.
Murder yourself.

run for president as a democrat

kek beat me to it

There's a loophole you can use in the Yellowstone National Park, look it up

Fuck off, feds

Do (k)not about ¿t.

Kill someone that wouldn't be missed.
A junky, hooker, bum, ETC.
It may not be your thing, but follow this song and you can pretty much get away with it.

youtube.com/watch?v=iSYCh0NuBuY

sciencealert.com/here-s-how-you-could-get-away-with-murder-in-yellowstone-s-zone-of-death

Funny

Well it is easiest to get away with murders of people you have no connection to. Go across the country find a bum in a back ally way kill them and then return home. Easy.

But you know the number one way not to get caught killing someone? DON'T POST IT ON FUCKING Sup Forums YOU BASIC BITCH!

Yeah im looking more for ways to actual dispose of the body and such.

Give your victim cyanide masked as Tylenol and go to the store and switch out a few bottles. I heard it worked before.

Not really edgy, just dont wanna go to jail.

Thats suicide, not what I want to do.

Stab someone to death with an icicle. Murder weapon melts. problem solved.

Thank you, will do.

Thank you, but I dont want to kill someone worthless.

Don't wanna kill someone worthless. Also thousands say they will kill someone and dont, I'm not planning on doing it anytime soon.

too impersonal, thanks though.

haha, I've thought if it before.

Then you're probably gonna get caught.

If you have someone in mind then you probably have motive and will get caught. The only way to really get away with it is if you do someone you have no connection to

Become a hiker, go hiking on a good tral, mabe 50+ miles. Don't tell anybody your going. and then if you find someone els on that trail....
Offer them a cup of coffe or trail mix and make a friend that shares the same hobby as you.

i would pay a homeless who doesnt care for going to jail also he must be an alcoholic or drug addicted

Find a hooker in a sketchy neighborhood. Fuck her bareback, as to aquire aids. Then seduce your victim. Bareback victim. They will die a slow and painful death. Then you will die as well being the faggot as you are.

Fucking ruthless

it depends. if you have a reason to kill someone. they slept with your wife, you boss sucks, bla bla. it's pretty easy for people to figure out, who did what.
it's lack of motive that serial killers get away with. if there was no reason for you to be there. and no one knows who you are, how the fuck are they going to suspect you.
next is the obvious. no witnesses. kill your mark in seclusion.

you really don't have to worry about body disposal too much, just don't leave DNA fucking every where, you're honstly more at risk lugging a body around.
never buy tools of trade with anything else than cash. and dispose of everything, whatever clothes, shoes, anything gloves mask, hat and weapons should be properly disposed of, not in a bin, but burned, schredded, tossed in a massive lake, and should never be left in your vehicle or taken to your home, place of business.

should I continue?

sure

take you're time and find a nice secluded woods. use maps, and scope out the area to make sure it's no where some ones gonna stuble on.
try not to make a messy kill. line you're trunk with thick contrator plastic, tape, ect, name of the game is not to get any DNA in your vehicle. wrap the person accordingly. you'll want to remove the teeth and any identifying factors, wallets, rings, well jewlry of any kind.
but a wagon, one with those terria wheels and grated side. it's not perfect but it's the best least suspicious way to transport the body from car to dig site.
find you spot secluded at least a ten minute walk from civilisation.
lay out a tarp to shovel dirt onto. it will take several hours, dig it at least 5 feet, it doesn't have to be wide just about a 3 foot circle, big enough for you to dig into.

now this is important. fill the body's oraficses with yogurt. the natural bacteria of yogurt will cause the body to decompose at an exponetial rate, so as long as it's not found In a week and a half you'll be good. stuff the body in, roll the tarp to push the dirt back in, scatter the left over dirt, pack the soil, cover the dog site with brush and leafs.
now take their teeth, what ever you wore while digging including shoes, and toss them in the middle of a large lake. thuroghly clean and dispose of the wagon, shovels.