>be me >work for a temp agency from time to time doing IT shit >Get an email about a job >$20/hr to install ram >that is literally the job description >fuck yes >get call 2 days ago for briefing on job >apparently the previous ram tech had a family emergency and couldn't finish, so I'm finishing up for her >holy shit females can install ram? >she didn't finish 9 computers and they need me to do it the next day >lol guess they can't >OkSureIGuess.wav >This shouldn't be too hard >Turns out I'm upgrading all Target computers to 16 gb of ram
Cont?
David Torres
nah
Samuel Lewis
No thanks.
Robert Butler
Do it faggot
Logan King
Brendan?
Michael Stewart
no
Jayden Hughes
Ok I won't
Noah Lee
eh okay
Jaxon Wood
eh why not
Landon Torres
continue brendan.
Matthew Jenkins
just go on mdfk
Carson Scott
brendan got spooked
Asher Jenkins
RIP Brendan.
Jaxson Barnes
Ok cool
>get to Target >no idea what I'm doing >ask to talk to manager >manager hands me a box with about 80 ram sticks in it >gives me a list of all the computers/registers I need to upgrade >didn't read any of the procedures I was supposed to the day before >walk up to first register >realize I forgot to read procedure on how to open the fucking thing so I can get to the ram part inside >ohfuck.jpg >see no screws >no levers >It's just a solid box >start panicking >oh wait I have the schematics on my phone >phone is dead >fuck >it's been 30 minutes >need to look busy >stare intently at register to give the appearance that I'm studying it while waiting for phone to charge >grab screwdriver >there's about a 3 inch opening between the register and the back of the wall it's resting against >take screwdriver and insert it into hole >start banging screwdriver on inside of hole >target employees look at me funny but don't say anything >they think i'm hacking the mainframe
cont
Kayden Torres
Brendan lives!
Caleb Thompson
yeah
Wyatt Wilson
Kek
Matthew Murphy
Keep going OP
Cooper Allen
Getting interesting. Continue user
Easton Wilson
> previous ram tech Loving this keep going op
Thomas Fisher
Hacking the mainframe... well I guess technically you are.
Jackson Diaz
what a load of shit. target would not sell you that much ram at once, they limit it to like 8 sticks.
Jace Hughes
Type faster Brendan.
Adam Adams
Are you dumb?
Mason Russell
Kek
John Perez
Double kek
Nicholas Rodriguez
>>start banging screwdriver on inside of hole not that kind of ram, OP
Dylan Johnson
Brendan is my autistic room mate
>phone finally charges and I can see the schematics to the registers >figure out how to open the shit >holy shit is it obnoxious >The motherboard is actually another smaller box that slides out of the bigger box >The wires inside are literally moms spaghetti >with dust as the sauce >in order to remove the smaller box, you have to remove all the wires on the inside >There is about 3 inches of clearance so you have to do it blind >It's annoying but doable >all except the fucking VGA cable >Little screws that keep them connected to the monitor have not been moved in probably years >rusted shut >They are fucking IMPOSSIBLE to turn via hand >There is not enough space to use a screwdriver >Use the flat part of my phone charger to turn the shit >it was the most autistic thing I've ever done
cont
Juan Gomez
I don't think you understand what autism is
But keep going
James Martinez
People just use autism as a slang word for retarded now.
Jason Robinson
A slang word for another slang word that's edgy
Caleb Ward
Well that's autistic.
Aiden Murphy
>Get all computers on my list done after about 5 hours >Call my team >"Hey all the computers are done, can i go home" >"My system is telling me that some computers aren't done" >"Which ones?" >Proceeds to list every computer that I just worked on >"Sir, I'm sure I upgraded the ram in each of those machines" >"Well reboot it, and upload a picture of the BIOS showing that all 16 gigs are on the system" >"Ok" >Goes back to first register >Realize I never checked the ram on any of the computers after upgrading >open the first register bios >it still says 4 gigs >wtf >Check ram sticks >They are definitely installed >wtf is going on >do some digging >realize the ram I was given was the previous ram tech's OLD ram >Also realize that the office gave me the list of computers that were done, not ones that I needed to do >I just undid every computer that the previous tech did and it took me 5 hours
cont
Alexander Phillips
Oh shit retarded is an actual word, wtf is wrong with me
Aiden Mitchell
no shit
Jonathan Howard
retarded isn't slang. it's an out-of-date medical term.
Jeremiah Brooks
slang is slang for shortened language
Nicholas Gonzalez
yikes holy shit that is fucking impressive. Do you have relatives who work for Exxon Mobil or BP?
Connor Sanders
I just realized that, how embarrassing
Jackson Sullivan
Yeah it's been a long day
Carter Ramirez
I would have just quietly walked out and moved towns.
Luke Howard
I don't think you understand what autism is
But keep going
Jesus, dude come on...
Xavier Barnes
At least OP is typing fast I'm vested.
Aiden Nelson
Out of date? since when? Doesn't it pretty much just mean "Slow of the mind"
Benjamin Green
It triggers normalfags.
Ethan Ward
Nice job fuckhead Now what?
Daniel Miller
Yeah it's an actual word, I always thought was slang. Turns out to actually be an adjective.
Wyatt Reed
Fleedle!! XD cont OP
Gabriel Baker
just gonna point out the last 4 digits
Daniel Mitchell
This turned out to be somewhat interesting.
Owen Bailey
What is normal?
Brandon Gray
I hope OP is still here, I like this story
Bentley Cox
Hurry op, my dick is getting soft
Liam Perez
Me too user, me too...
Christopher Sanchez
these days it's being gay, having blue hair, hating white people (especially males), and being a cuck
Owen Watson
that seems pretty excessive considering they probably just use them to keep records and shit. Also that shouldn't be too much of a job to install it in the PCs, I could probably finish one upgrade in under five minutes as long as the cases aren't a pain in the ass to get into then maybe 10-15 minutes Really they should just upgrade to SSDs, I did where I work and the PCs boot up and access local files at least 3X as fast as a HDD
Henry Brown
>Begin redoing all the computers >Don't mention to company that I'm retarded >Continue working all all the computers >Get them done much quicker this time because I know how to do it now >Finish in 2 hours tops >Call office >"Hey I'm done now, ran into a couple technical difficulties but I managed to overcome them" >"Ok" >He checks his system >"I'm still seeing some computers undone, looks like you have some more" >"Which ones? I did every one on the list." >Proceeds to list every register in the entire store. >I contemplate suicide >I want you to picture target >I want you to think of all the computers you see in that fucking store >I had to do all of them >I was supposed to leave 3 hours ago
cont
Evan Garcia
In the end somebody walks a dinosaur. You're a retarded
Charles Bailey
> After 5 hours of undoing the work, I was tired as fuck >Ask the chief If I can go home now. I'm not even asking to pay for my work anymore >He said: "no. suck my hairy balls you little sissy faggot" >So i got on my knees and start to suck him off real slow >He started to breath heavy >I grabbed his cock and started to suck on in too >Chief then put out of his pocket 20$ and slapped me with it
cont
Nolan Lee
>I was supposed to leave 3 hours ago
$20 is $20
Jason Edwards
Just look on Facebook, your local grocery store, etc.
Christopher Ward
I don't think you understand what autism is
But keep going
Jesus, dude come on...
Dude you're being paid right? Unless this is below your usual earnings I'd say be happy to be working
Jonathan Cook
>Faggot detected >Not OP
Gavin Turner
Picture every computer in Target... like 8. At least where I'm from.
Andrew Parker
Post your fantasies somewhere else
Jeremiah Morris
not MY op!
Evan Anderson
This post gave me a little electric tingly feeling. Spooky stuff ya goober.
Cameron Smith
I don't even know how to respond to that
Zachary Hughes
fucking summerfag
Blake Cox
Why did it give you such a feeling?
Ayden Nelson
>The wires inside are literally moms spaghetti >with dust as the sauce so like this?
Jonathan Mitchell
>I was supposed to leave 3 hours ago >Work shit temp job >Cry about working classic millennial
Blake King
Fuck you satan I am of age to be on here
Brandon Walker
Working to live is better than living to work wouldn't you agree?
Aiden Evans
Because i know what you mean. There is a normal state out there, however relative the word normal is. And sometimes i peek at it, and spooks me that i dont live there.
Liam Torres
Don't know about him but I agree.
William Richardson
user learned about porn from google images
Jaxon Cruz
just hang yourself
Carter Watson
Do you think the inside my Xbox one console looks like that? I bought it back in 2013 or so, never cleaned it
Thomas Bailey
Wtf are you on about?
Cameron Peterson
probably so
Jordan Adams
Cum on it and eat the dust.
Wyatt Taylor
why the fuck did they ask you to do it if you had no idea how to do it? Don't you have an IT department for that? If not they need to hire/contract one out because if everyonee did their own IT work nothing will get done.
Brody Phillips
sorry, but that's not my box
Eli Garcia
but tomorrow is another surprise
Josiah Jones
Jesus Christ
Jaxon Robinson
they gave him instructions to follow in this part of the story
Xavier Wilson
Is actually a true story. Gonna warn you now, there's no big ending, just more shit
>Continue working on computers >I'm determined to get this shit done >Starting to get really sweaty in my button down in the warm environment >quickly realize I forgot to put on deodorant this morning >fuck >grab deodorant from store >put that shit on in the bathroom >move on to the electronics department computers >somewhat happy I can talk to other computer nerds >see one guy back there >slightly older guy back there (mid 30's maybe) >talk with him about the job >the difficulty of it >why the company wants 16gb of ram on store computers in the first place, etc >the guy is great. >we make nerd jokes and talk nerd shit >At one point I say >"Yeah man, I'm opening these computers up and most of them are older than me" >He looks me dead in the eye >"I'm not impressed?" >"W. . .what?" >" 'These computers are older than me' . . .I'm not impressed" >Autism kicks into maxidrive >get very defensive >"WELL IT'S TRUE" >suddenly it's very quiet >customers and employees are starting at me >realize I screamed that >silently turn away and go back to my computer
cont
Jack Lewis
>11 y/o >optomist >thinks arguing online will get somewhere
Cooper Davis
Aah, just like the computers out in a warehouse just use some canned air to blow it out and it'll be good to go, just do it outside unless you like pneumoconiosis
Matthew Anderson
>Autism kicks into maxidrive Tampon-level autism.
Tyler Thompson
Sounds like you are having a very autistic day mate. I've had those days before. Shitty autistic sperg tard burger days. Those days are the worst. Cheer up user, and also CONTINUE the story ;)
Chase Martin
...
Carson Long
Yeah but they should have made sure he knew them before working on them. Giving computer hardware (especially RAM) to someone who knows little about pc buildiing/maintenance is like throwing it away. ESD could fry all the chips because he wont ground himself while working on it
Lucas Watson
>those last 2 lines
Ayden Anderson
Lol you are basically a robot Asian who has been set on a manual labor task. Dumb nigger
Anthony Lopez
There is this ancient greek technique where you visualize what positive events will happen but also what negative ones will occur. You then come up with solutions to those possible negative situations. Wish I could find it again, very thought provoking
Jaxson Taylor
ignoring your shitty post... nice 00 dubs
Alexander Miller
What imaginary world do you live in? Have you ever seen the fuckwits working on server hardware under warranty? Dell, Lenovo, HP etc. all pay about $20 a job... That's a job, not per hour, per fucking job. You think they're getting NASA scientists replacing critical parts in servers and shit? Nope its the stoner down the road who will work for peanuts.
Fuck are you even on about cunt you have no fucking clue what you are talking about. Replacing RAM is literally monkey work.