Be me 3 years ago

>be me 3 years ago
>finally give The Velvet Underground and Nico a listen after putting it off for months
>instantly fall in love with Venus In Furs
>Instantly becomes my favorite song
>decide to read up a little on it
>find out it's based on the book Venus In Furs
>order a copy online, pic related
>was still living with parents back then and mother fetched the package and called me a pervert for ordering a "sex book" and threw it away
>waste another 24€ to get another copy delivered to a friend
>read it
>suddenly develop S&M fetish
>can't get off to anything else anymore and I'm a pervert in my mothers eyes since then

thanks Lou

...

Well at least you didn't decide to check out [not naming it, you know the one] if you were going to buy the inspiration for it

>your mom opens your mail

BDSM is the most patrician fetish

yeah she was that kind of cunt
when I told her its against the law she just slapped me

and I bet you enjoyed it you sick sadomasochist fuck

>doesn't understand that BDSM is a catch-all umbrella term to describe several common fetishes and RL activitity designed to satisfy said fetishes

>doesn't understand that he literally just said something like: LGBT is the best sexuality

...

Kek

Snap.

my doctor said I do have mommy issues

Did he just tell you this when giving your balls a fondle for lumps? If my Doctor started telling me I had psychological issues I might question his expertise in the area and ask how he drew those conclusions given our lack of therapy and conversation other than "Is everything else, other than your testicle worry, ok? General health good?" "er y-yes"

By doctor I meant therapist

went there for depression, she asked about my sexual fetishes and she said that sounds like mommy issues

How's therapy working for you?
I should probably try it but then I think nah fuck that lark

especially if I get asked about my sexual fetishes

>errm to have sex

should've asked her if she wanted to be your mommy for the day :^)

Eh it was fine, helped a lot actually

I had troubles merely accepting that I'm depressed since I was still convinced I was just lazy like my mother said

That's most of my problem. I'm fairly certain I'm depressed but if I seek therapy then I'll get diagnosed as such and it's just easier to carry on as.

venus in furs is objectively the best song to put on your tinder

i'll have to try this.

i want those trendy avant girls who have weird fetishes

Nah since another point of the therapy was developing strategies against it
and that was necessary, if you just stay in the eternal depressive circlejerk with yourself, you'll at some point end up borderline lethargic

It's objectively one of the best songs ever period

you're such a cunt

more velvet underground than Loaded