How the hell do I actually get a girlfriend?

How the hell do I actually get a girlfriend?

before replying don't say anything retarded like

>go to da gym
>FiND a hOBBy
>just talk to her durrr

Give me actual useful advice on what to do if someone catches my eye.

Have you tried not being autistic?

You should understand what she likes and stuff,maybe start talking ti her?

Well you don't have to find a gym.
But you do have to get fit and swole. Unless you "plan" to "actually get" a girlfriend involves kidnapping. You need the girl to go with you willingly, and they won't if you're a fatfuck or a wimp.
You're also gonna need a high-paying job, because the other thing women need is money. A lot of it. You don't so much "get" a girlfriend as you hire a prostitute full time for double the cost due to an exclusivity agreement. You just pay for her in dinners and gifts instead of straight up buying sex directly.

>before replying don't give me actual useful adice

well gee OP

just be cool, have something to talk about, smile, don't be too sickly/out of shape
oh, and stay away from americans, they have an ATM for a heart

When you're talking to a girl that you like, ask questions about herself. This works on anyone in fact in getting them to like you. The one topic that people love to talk about is themselves, so abuse that.

Ask them lots of questions about their life and their interests. Oddly enough, it'll make you seem like an interesting person, even though you don't say a damn thing about yourself.

The one who asks the questions in a conversation can control where they want it to go.

...

Just be yourself bro. Worked for me

...

everybody's favorite thing to talk about is themselves, be interested in her and you'll immediately be liked more. also, find a middle ground between needy and acting like you're not interested, either ends of that spectrum are obnoxious.

So what you really mean is for him to be YOURself, not himself.
Because being himself doesn't work, or he'd already have a GF.

Absolutely do not do this, clearly you're an autistic fuck, in fact try the opposite, change everything about yourself, change your hair style, your clothes, your tastes.
Now how to actually get a gf depends on a lot of things, are you in uni, do you have a group of friends that you hang out with, basically how many single girls do you have in your environment, walking up to a chick on the street is firstly desperate secondly won't work

I think this dude gave you excellent advice

This

>get off computer
>go work
>get money
>find an attractive woman
>ask her out

Its not that hard just go for it the worst thing that can happen is that she says no and then you search for another woman

I met my gf online. We shared some mutual interests so we talked about them and our first date was related to those shared interests. You really have to find something to talk about. Something interesting. You have to be someone people want to be with.

Okay OP, here's what you do:

1. Stop giving a fuck about getting a girlfriend. Just socialize with people and eventually someone either notices you or doesn't.
2. Gym does help. Literally every single human being notices what's on the outside first. Looking good helps you get into relations with people. Get over it.
3. Stop trying to get your dream girl. She does not exist. Stop romanticizing the reality.
4. Be yourself. It doesn't give you any more odds of getting a girlfriend, but when you find one she knows you and not some pretentious ass douche. The best relationships consist of two authentic people that can cope with each other and the worst relationships are unhappy couples pretending to be someone they're not, thus making both unhappy.
5. Don't consider getting a girlfriend is some sort of milestone. That just makes you the bitch bride that hits the gym before marriage and eats cake after.
6. If you're talking to people and not getting attention, there's most likely something off about you. Find out what and then determine is it more important to make a change in yourself or just choose to be alone.

I've dated about 10 girls in my life. The longest relationship I had was three and a half years. But if I had been honest to myself in that relationship, I would've left her. Instead I clinged to her and got hurt.

My current status is single and I'm mostly just looking for sex. I love being single. It means I don't have to tolerate anyone else in my apartment while I'm home. It means that I have all the freedom in the world to do whatever I wish without committing to anyone. Why should this be a problem in any way? You just need to stop obsessing over it OP. It's not really that glamorous to be in a relationship anyway. It has it's upsides and downsides and the same goes for being single.

I don't need a GF just for the sake of having one because I know the consequences.

I, like you just want to fuck. Getting a gf is the best way since hookers here are basically nonexistent from what I can tell and bitches universally are too stuck up for a hook up.

Just be yourself bro, girls dig calm confidence. Works for me

The harder I try not to be autistic the more autistic is the outcome

True. I do this but it feels as if every bitch that doesn't look like a retard is always taken. Nearly impossible to find a partner that isn't a disgusting 2/10 shit even then those types are taken lol

have you tried being heterosexual?