Ask a video games tester anything

Ask a video games tester anything.

On a scale of 1-10, how many cocks have you sucked?

Do you like your job? How much technical skill is required, and do you have a degree?

Why is my belly button fluff always blue?

10.1

No technical skill. I work in localisation so you just need to speak a language fluently.

How do you live on $6.00 an hour?

Because you have AIDS

do you test video games?

It's £7.20, but sure. Life is shit, I only work part-time there at the moment.

No shit, Sherlock.

How does it feel to work the most useless dead-end job ever conceived by man

How many video games have you tested

7 and part time. Why even live

How is that being a tester? Your work is proofreading stuff.

Feels good, man. 40hrs a week to come in, get a coffee and boot up my PS4/XB1 is a wonderful thing.

Probably ~15 over 2 years including shitty mobile games.

Sounds awesome.

Basically. Yeah localisation is just proofreading.Jelly, bro?

It is actually a fucking joke.

Jelly of what? Your horrible job that you think is awesome? I'm real jealous.

>on a scale
Nigger you dumb as fuck.

Hmm, I dunno. Jelly of a job that requires basically no effort? You just have to turn up and play computer games for 8 hours every day? Yeah, can't think of one singular reason it might be better than your job. Sorry, *welfare check.

What's the worst ever game you have tested?
I assume you have contact with developers so can you encourage them to charge for dlc or shoot up the office pls.
Are you a jew?

I had Freind who worked for team 17 in the 90's.
I played the worms prototype before it was released.
>hands down worms is the best game ever
Worms 1, the rest are utter shit

Worst game would be FFXV. Glitchy-ass piece of shit. We are in contact with the Devs, but only to enquire about features or alert them to bugs. I am not a Jew. Religion is stupid.

replies but no 'checked'

Worms Armageddon is my fave. Fuck your shitty Worms 1.

Just like every other franchise game over time they go to utter shit

No
>play the first edition
Maybe my age is showing but it's far more superior game play wise

How do you get a job in the field

Worms 1 just felt really beta to me. Unintuitive controls, crappy UI. Worms Armageddon was everything great about previous titles, but just polished,

Dat feel. Our favourite series' are becoming cash cows and there's no getting around it.

How did you get started
Was the equipment you played on funded
How much were you paid
What was the timeframe and what did you look for while testing?

Im still sad about kirby

You are probably correct, nostalgia kicks in tbh.
Sat with Freinds streining our eyes trying land shots on tiny pink targets.
I'm going to have roll a joint and play that rn.
The 3D editions killed the game in my opinion
>timing the ninja rope swings to place a mine or dynamite, fucking priceless kek

Those feels.
Worms 3D was cancer. Killed the series.

1. I applied for the job with a reference from a friend 2 years ago.
2. All the equipment we play on is bought by the company.
3. All localisation testers are paid minimum wage.
4. I've worked here for 2 years and what we largely test is the language used in games - dialogue, menus etc. We correct any spelling/grammatical errors and overflow of text.

Long live Kirby's Dream Course,

F

But you said it was part time. 40 hours a week sounds like a full time thing...

It's not that it's a shit job. You're just a shit person thinking you've got it so made. You do nothing really and earn money for it. Then act like it's the greatest thing. It's pretty pathetic. And I love video games.

I'm on a zero hours contract. Meaning I can be working 40+ hours a week or none at all.

Lel, you triggered hard, bro. I have a better job than you, get over it.

>sexual love video games or just enjoy there company kinda love?

Kirby Robobot was one of the best games I've ever played. It was like my best shroom trip, only better. You're not tripping enough.

Give me more drugs, then.

Why was f-zero the best racing game ever?

Arent we all testers when we buy early access games?

Because you thrive on nostalgic boners

how many dicks do you have to suck to have this job? and how many dicks do you have to suck while testing games?

Come over to my house. I'll get you high.

Many.

Basically. You can check the 200 hours of Rust I've played to that testament.

Legit AF.