What was the worst sex you've ever had?

what was the worst sex you've ever had?

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none.
any love is good love.

never had sex nigga

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Pizza is all good, but that doesn’t mean you can’t discuss the worst pizza you’ve ever had

I once faked an orgasm with my first gf because her vagooter was too loose for me to get off. But we actually broke up because she wanted to get back with her abusive ex. I didn't protest; I was going to dump her anyways.

enjoy being alone for ever faggot

one fucked a fat girl who was a virgin at 22 super dead lay but she was into anal, could not suck dick either.

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You should've beat the shit out of her, stole her phone, and raped her ass.

>on five tabs of acid
>boyfriend at the time asks me if i want to have sex
>sure
>makes absolutely no attempt at foreplay, just goes straight at me and pulls my pants down
>tries putting it in my ass, can't get hard
>he has the idea to take a shower together
>enter bathroom
>get naked together
>he stares at me for what seems like an eternity asking me what i wanted
>trapped in a thought loop regarding him thinking i'm inadequate and disgusting
>break thought loop
>turn on hot water and step in the tub with him
>embrace him face to face under the water
>he keeps asking me what i want
>almost completely unable to articulate myself
>tell him that i want to feel good
>he repeats this line of questioning until i break down and repeatedly tell him that i just want to feel good
>hot water runs out
>towel off
>get back in bed and start crying
>he decides to just leave

simultaneously the worst trip and sex of my life

I once cheated on an ex with some whore girl at school when I was 17. We fucked underneath a highway in a place called graffiti graveyard.

>be 21
>have Sex with a emo girl
>one night stand, tell her lie were I work
>days later my mom calls me up, hey user there was a girl in the shop of a friend of hers and was looking for me
>a day later I recognized that she gave me something to think about...
>go to doc for crab treatment on my sac

Monsters ball lol

He probably realised you were fucked up and didn't like it I guess

with a fat girl, she sat on my face and it wasn't very pleasant.

he was on 3 or 4 hits of acid too

I got blackout drunk as fuck and fucked a really fat chick that was always nice to me. It was fucking disgusting I sort of sobered up a bit halfway through and was extremely disgusted with what i was seeing/smelling. I mean her stomach hung down to her fucking knees she was so fat.

i'll also add that he's never been the type of person to want to please me. only ever cared about getting his own rocks off. i dumped him years ago though.

What was the aftermath tho? Did you two breakup?

As much as you might think guys like fucking drugged up girls most don't. it's like fucking a doll most times

did you at least finish?

My ex.

She’d constantly decide midway through making out that she didn’t want to have sex. I accepted it, fine.

She’d be super picky about everything I did. If I kissed her in a boring way, she’d berate me. If I touched her too lightly or too softly, she’d get mad and sometimes decide she didn’t want to do it anymore. If I fucking SMILED during sex, she’d sometimes think I was making fun of her and start crying (she refused to accept the possibility that maybe I was happy to have sex with her). She had a terrible sense of humor, btw.

If I suggested a position other than missionary, she’d say she wasn’t comfortable with that.

She couldn’t stand to be naked. She’d ask to keep her shirt or bra on, or say we had to have sex under the covers. Afterward she’d always immediately get fully dressed.

She never got anything resembling wet. She was dry, all the time. She made me use lube and would tell me to “hurry up and cum” literally every time because I hurt her no matter how much lube I used.

She said “it’s unladylike and humiliating to have an orgasm. Orgasms are for men.”

Being with her really fucked with my head. I was convinced that she really didn’t want to have sex with me. I tried to talk to her about this numerous times. She always insisted she was extremely attracted to me and wanted to have sex with me. I tried to be understanding and talk with her about what we could do to have better sex, but she always thought I was attacking her - that I was telling her she wasn’t good enough.

The awful sex was just one reason I got the fuck out of that relationship. Then I met New girls. I almost tried The first time I had sex with someone who actually seemed like she wanted to fuck me.

we stayed together for another year or so after that

i was completely willing to get all up on him, suck his dick, anything really. he just wanted to cut straight to sex. i'm not sure if you fully understand the situation, but this guy was a virgin until he met me. and an absolutely terrible lay while sober.

>vagooter
Fine use of the word "vagooter", user.

>Girlfriend wanted to have sex for the first time but kept changing her mind

>3 hours later, finally decides to go through with it

>She wasnt a virgin and was 25 at the time

>We start having sex

>10 minutes in, has an orgasm, decides she doesnt wanna have sex anymore

>mama didnt raise no idiot, so i stop because rape and deal with blue balls

>dump her in the morning when i wake up

Dumb bitch

Does being molested count

beta faggot

fat puerto rican chick from new jersey. I couldn't even stay hard. It was that dark leathery skin between her legs from all the friction she generates when she walks. Fuckin gross. Fat chicks are nasty. But I thought it could be an easy lay, and she was easy. Literally matched with her on tinder, she agrees to come over after a few messages. It was literally the easiest hookup, and at least she gave some mean head. But yeah, not one of my best by far.

>but this guy was a virgin until he met me
Oh nevermind

Alpha as fuck, well done user

the was the only move. well done.

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lemme put things further into perspective: he has only made TWO deliberate attempts to make me cum within the ~2,5 years we were together. and he didn't even want to in the first place during those occasions. completely selfish. i seriously hope he never gets to have sex again.

>neither the gf or I wanted to have sex and we were both super tired
>she insists we should anyways
>oblige her because maybe she will return the favor later
>she's acts incredibly lazy and doesn't bother to try much
>halfway through she goes to the bathroom to pee
>am pretty annoyed at the interruption
>she comes back and just lies motionless on the bed because she doesn't give a fuck
>give her a wtf look and rush to the finish without bothering to please her

btw i have a dick
he even told me one time 'ugh i wish you could just cum from anal'

You should've forced it upon her. It's what she wanted.

Those kind of women acknowledge that a man's pleasure is all that matters, they expect to be used.

Was about to fuck a fat 4/10 out of depression. Turned out she had never once in her life put anything up there. An ant wouldn't fit his dick in her. She proceeded to give me awful head

>btw i have a dick
welp

Oh user. I've got a story for you.

So.

It was last year. Around december. I was 22 and hadn't had sex with a women going on 2 years. I got in touch with a high-school friend (we'll call her M for short) I'm not gonna lie. M is kinda hideous. But I honestly like her *as a friend* and we are still friends today. But back to the story. I call M over to my house to reminisce about the old high-school days and we get to talking and she reveals that she had a crush on me back then. I thought it was sweet because no one had ever really given a shit about me like that before in my life. We got to talking about dating and turns out she was single just like me.
Now keep in mind. I can STILL count the number of sexual experience i've had on my hands so I'm pretty starved for sex at this point I eventually talk her into my bedroom (which wasn't that hard actually) I began taking off her shirt, big mistake, M is kind of a whale. It's fucking horrible my dudes. She's shaped like an obese potato. But I try to focus on the two good things on her body, her breast. I love titties so I just had a feild day with those. She liked it. She wants to return the favor with a bj. I'm down with that of course....until she gets down to it. I'm circumcised ( Please don't start your autistic arguments about uncut vs cut ) and immediately starts out by grabbing my dick and stretching the skin from the tip of my dick to the base and it hurts like hell and she starts sucking. I inch closer because clearly this bitch can't realize I don't have foreskin to pull back and she's killing me. I suffer through her horrible toothy bj for about 4 mintues and decide ok I'll just try to have some fun on my own. Now I've always wanted to eat pussy. Never tried it before then but I just knew I'd be good at it because I'd watched so much lesbian porn in the past. So I tell her to lay back on my bed and she does. p/1

:(

it is possible to cum from anal though

kek i thought you were a girl
maybe he just wasnt into penors

kek

I'll take one p/2 please

>2nd ex gf
>have sex so much to the point I really don't care if we don't have sex some days
>lately she's been trying to force me to cum in her
>lol fuck no
>one day she wants to fuck real bad
>can't, no condoms, and no place since I was at my cousin's home that day
>have money but don't want to go to store near cousin's home because store owners are related to me
>she sends my cousins neighbor (also my friend) to buy condoms for us
>we decided to fuck in this abandoned house next to cousins house
>fucking for past 2 hours but I really didn't feel like having sex that day
>hard but not cumming anytime soon
>she rides me for the rest of the session but I never finish
>she eventually does and offers to finish me but I don't wanna
>she was pissed off that I wasn't into it that day
Yeah that was the worst sex I had

I can already tell where this is going, never ever go down on a fat chick.

This. When you have such a whiny bitch for a gf it can go one of two ways. She calls the cops on you for domestic abuse and rape, or she loves it and becomes your sex slave for life.

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My friend and I double teamed a girl for me to make my virginity. We fucked her for a month maybe 10 times and each time I couldn’t have an orgasm because I couldn’t feel anything from her pussy. I was hard just to know that I was inside of a girl but I eventually broke it off after she told me her true age so she said she would commit sucide if I left her. I left her.

not for me. plus i want to cum from my dick. selfish lover.
see above. selfish lover. did not care about my pleasure. at all. foreplay to him was just a means of making me spread my legs as quickly as possible. as soon as he cums, loses interest. the only time he ever made me cum was when i was having a really bad day before we were officially "together" and i had been crying into his chest for like half an hour. absolutely. only. cared. about. getting. HIS. orgasm.

If my GF was acting like that I'd leave too. No morals in fucking someone who's off their tits.

The only sex I've ever had. Not a lot of wiggle room with this one.

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I met this girl on fetlife who gushed all the time about how kinky and filthy minded she was, and was pretty pumped up to actually hook up with her because of it. She was the single most boring person I've ever interacted with, in bed and out. She had bland non-opinions about every single thing, she wasn't interested in actually doing anything kinky, she wanted to look at bdsm pictures while having totally vanilla sex, she freaked out if anything got near her butt, she was reluctant to give head, and if I ever got even vaguely rough or dominating with her she'd start repeating her safe word over and over (we never talked about a safe word, she just already had that shit kicking around in her head).

I tried to make it work for about two weeks, then finally was just fed up and done. And she fell apart because she thought things were going great between us.

Sucks.

Story has a happy ending, met this really shy conservative girl on okcupid, and she's pretty much down for (and enthusiastic about) absolutely ANYTHING as long as the relationship is committed and she's had a few drinks.

gotta love adventure quest

>not making a man cum
that is the laziest sexual thing ever

yea i mean if i was going to date a guy i'd definitely touch his prenis

I think you’re being glib, but you might have a point.

She told me a few times that I “shouldn’t take no for an answer.” She said “I don’t know what I want, I think you’d know better.” I asked her if she wanted me to force her to have sex, and she said no. So I asked her to explain What she meant... and she shut down and wouldn’t talk about it anymore.

The whole thing made me really uncomfortable if I’m being honest. If a girl is telling me to Ignore consent, she better be a good fucking communicator. Oh yeah, and be mentally stable. I would have to really, really trust her, have a safe word...

Gosh, is she now in europe?! I had the very same hookup!

FetLife?

>foreplay to him was just a means of making me spread my legs as quickly as possible
>spread my legs
But you said you were a guy?

His name was Luigi.
I got fucked every time I played him.

sounds exactly like an ex i had in Texas.

fucking shit i forgot about that game

F for my dude warlic

hopefully i'll find somebody who wants us both to cum our fucking brains out each and every time we fuck.
guys can have missionary sex too. either way, it's just an expression

The last girl I had sex with. I was eating her out one time because she asked me to, I didn't want to, and some little ball of something got in my mouth from her pussy and I have no idea what the fuck it was. I made her get an STD test and she didn't have anything which is the only thing that made me not want to kill myself. I just visibly cringed and gagged thinking about this. She was maybe a 6/10 and that makes it even worse. I wish I never had sex with her.

fucking this piggy. Awful, awful sex, but was high as fuck and she was grinding on me. One of those nights where you're just like "fuck it"

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how uncomfortable must that be, to do missionary as 2 guys?

he didn't even suck your dick?

>be me
>be 17
>have long-term relationship with a chick from class
>physically she has everything i could ever want with minor exceptions, but she was extremely psychotic and toxic
>3 months into the relationship
>both parents work so we usually ditch school for sex
>while fucking accidentally bite her lip
>she instantly stopped and went apeshit
>eventually turned-off because of the argument, got up and dressed
>she took offense for that and it got much more serious and we started fighting for like 30 min straight
>she eventually packed her things and leave

fat girls i've fucked was way better than this shit

She looks like a beached whale I might add and i can't even see her head over her stomach but I don't care, all I want is to finally eat some pussy. So I take off her blanket panties and get ready to dig in.

and then the smell hit me. You can't tell but I had to take a moment to stop typing because of the memories it brought me. It was the worst smell I'd ever experienced in my life. It stung my nose and made me gag. It was like hot garbage and unwashed taint all mixed together. Looking back I realize I have some issues with myself to put myself through this ordeal but that's neither here nor there. Anyway I was faced with a few problems.
1.) The smell obviously
2.) As much as she disgust me at this moment I don't want to hurt her feelings because I actually do care for her.
3.) If I tell her how filthy she is I run the risk of not having sex by telling her.
3.) I was desperate for sex.

So with every ounce of shame I have left in my pathetic being I regret to tell you all that I began to get out that rancid cunt. It was...it was a nightmare. There are no other words. Only that it took a month and paying a high end prostitute to get me to forget about this experience

Moving on. After I put up a good front like I hadn't just scarred myself for life I put on a condom and entered her. It was pretty difficult to get hard after that ordeal but when you are desperate you find a way. And find a way I did. at least in the missionary position I wouldn't have to smell the dumb between her legs. I began thrusting. Again I say, M is a whale. so fucking her was like fucking a bean bag with a gut that rolls up and pushing back at me. So there we are rocking back and forth because there is no way I can lean forward over that gut and still be inside her. and as I'm fucking this thing I'm thinking to myself why would I put myself through this. Why do I always settle for whatever shitty thing comes into my life and jump for a chance at the barest minimal. p/2

Damn. So it was shitty the first night but you were that desperate for pussy that you were hoping to make something out of nothing and kept trying for two weeks? Shitty story with a shitty ending user.

ok, please dont judge me on this


>I was inspired by the deerfucker (dont have the screencap of the orignal thread at hand)
>decided to try roadkill out, just once for the heck of it
>last month i got lucky
>dead doe on roadside
>pick her up in complete darkness, by wrapping her in plastic bags.
>not so easy, cause she is really stiff and cold
>throw her in the trunk
>drive through the woods.
>funny smell in my car.
>arrive on location, open the trunk.
>lift her up
>something drips down from the bag.
>intense stench.
>what the.
>unbag her.
>holy shit.
>the side that was in contact with the road is completely jelly like and hairless.
>maggot everywhere
> she is no longer half-frozen.
>a farting/gurgling noise from her head
>pungent smell erupts from her bloated body after i drop her on the ground.
>notice greasy slime all over my hands, arms and in my trunk.
>i am choking
>never smelled anything like this.
>its like rotten flesh, feces and ammonia.
>i start puking and running to escape the smell.
>collapse after i accidentaly inhale my own vomit
>coughing, choking and vomiting on the ground.
>i am close to passing out, i cant breath
>i try to calm myself down
>i try to breath slowly and controlled, but the memory of the smell alone is enough to make me cough and choke again.
>it takes a few minutes for me to calm down.
>i have to resist the urge to think of the smell, to breath to fast, to even think of what is covering my hands.
>i remove my smelling clothes and just throw them in the next bush.
>i get back into my car only wearing shoes and underware.
>i dont even close my trunk, because the smell in my car is unbearable.
>just drive off, leaving my clothes behind, along with a deer corpse, a box of condoms and a few plastic bags.
>never return.
>to this day i have trouble breathing when thinking about this stuff.

now i just fap to necro-furry-porn like everyone else. roadkill just isnt for me.

lel are you a black guy

Damn did we date the same girl? Same experience user

not uncomfortable at all. cock hits me at a different angle and it's easier to kiss. plus you get to see each other's faces.
he tried. once. he got bored. probably because he felt like he was wasting his time not getting HIS rocks off

I mean I guess I was that night, taking home the fatty.

fuck outta here with your reposts, cuck

As a black dude this gave my sides a trip to mars

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>21 years old
>fucked up on xans in bangkok
>maybe 4am, sitting with a friend and the girl he picked up
>thai woman sits next to me
>she's 42
>"hey"
>"hey user"
>talk to her for one minute, asks if she wants to go to a hotel and have sex
>"sure user"
>goes to hotel with 42 year old thai, workers ask if she's a hooker
>card gets declined
>force her to take me to her place
>she takes me to a shed in the slums of bangkok
>wtf
>she lays out a finding nemo bedsheet on the ground, no bed
>wraps up
>ask her to suck my dick
>"i wont suck your dick unless you lick my pussy user"
>start to go down on her
>pussy looks like a blown up face with afro
>fuck it im horny
>tastes like microwaved tuna
>struggle my way through it, finally gets my dick sucked
>time for some fucking
>wraps up
>fucks her for some time
>about to cum
>cum in her pussy
>condom broke during fucking
>fuckfuckfuck
>leaves at 7am
>all her neighbors saw me and started laughing
>come home to hostel, sleeps until 7pm
>she sends a picture she took of me and tells me she misses me
>mfw i maybe have hiv
>mfw i maybe have a kid in thailand
>mfw everyone calls me nemo from this day forth

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i got kicked very close to my balls and broke a finger, fucking a pony.

had sex out-of-the-blue with a friend I was crushing on for two years. She never seemed to be interested so I didn't think it would happen. Everything was great until the calve cramp came, then she awkwardly decided to stop everything and go to sleep.

>42
I wouldn't worry about the fatherhood thing.

At this point I'm in a full existential crisis and of course my boner dies without me enjoying a single thrust. Didn't help she was barely wet even after sacrificing my dignity going down on her. So after a few more shameful tries I finally pull my limpness out of her and say it's not happening. She is confused and asking whats wrong and I blame it on the condom and not being able to feel anything through it. This seems to work and I just lay down next to her, breathing slightly hard and looking up at the ceiling and wondering what the fuck I had gotten myself into. For some reason she seems like she enjoyed it even though she didn't cum. She told me that she had never actually had an orgasm before so felt that all my suffering was even more in vain but I don't show any signs of regret. I joke and we laugh and play it off all lovey dovey with her. But I quickly excuse myself minutes later to go wash the shame out of my mouth. I come back just as she's all dressed back up and is now on my couch, we watch a little bit of tv and chat some more before she has to go. She's acting all flirtatious with me and I, emotionally and physically exhausted, just go with it. She hints at us doing this again to which I guarantee it will and immediately begin mentally beating myself for even saying that.

Weeks go by with us talking and catching up more and me visiting her house and I'm doing everything to make it seem like I want to have sex with her again but at the same time ensuring it won't happen. I ask for sex at inappropriate times, or when I can tell she's not in the mood, I give excuses for why she can't come over and fuck, and all other sorts of nonsense. until one day I'm over visiting her and I finally have to just say it. It's been about a month since it happened and I just tell her I really care about her as a friend, which I honestly do, but I don't think we should be having sex and it's better off we just be friends. p/3 - final in next part

Im a true wwizerd, still a kisses virgin.

This seemed to work because she too felt like it was a little off for us to be fuck buddies or something. So we both agreed to never touch each others junk again and she, I and a another friend from high school all played Uno together that day.

and since that day I try to forget that it ever happened and vowed to never fuck another fat girl again in my life.

Well there ya go. The worst sexual experience I've ever had and probably will ever have.

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how does your card get declined in thailand...

But then again you went down on an old hooker so, I guess you aren't the brightest out there

so are you still friends with her?

This huge girl from Chicago. I’m a manlet, and she’s about 5’10” 250lbs. I’t didn’t affect the sex much, but I felt like a tiny baby trying to fuck her. For some reason she wanted us to get sloppy drunk beforehand and waited until 3 am to get naked. I was tired as hell but those giant tits kept calling me. Her pussy was dry as the desert to start and I eventually just went limp. I ended up fucking her with a dildo, and she was very polite to blow me to completion. It was a long night but meh I’d actually repeat.

Kek

yeah, we're actually going to see a movie together next week.

... getting caught by my parents, balls deep in our family dog

>plowing cousin who lives far away
>”oh user fuck me from behind”
>flip her around
>go to insert dick and notice brown circle around the ass
>stinks like someone who doesn’t wipe
>”ooohhh user you wanna fuck my ass?”
>gagged and Faked cumming so I could nope the fuck out
>haven’t spoken to her since

google it

Fuck no, I couldn't. I just gave up and then I couldn't fall asleep and just lay there till she left in the morning wallowing in self disgust.

>Vagooter

>thailand
I wouldn't worry about the fatherhood thing

The last few times I had sex with my wife before I left her.
I felt so guilty, disconnected, and dishonest. And cold.

One time I was having sex and the girl looked at me and said "And they makin' Knack 2".

>Huh?

"Now whatcha gon do?"

>Huh?

It was weird.

lol I know this is probably fake but that's funny. Also I need to get a dog.

When you faked said orgasm, did you say, "Oh God, unh, oh God!" and then run outside claiming you left you Gatorade bottle?

I know this feel user. It's almost surreal isn't it? All the passion is gone. It justs feels sad and empty. I hope you're doing ok friend.