It's a "Truman shoves hard boiled eggs up his ass and immediately regrets it after ejaculating" episode

>it's a "Truman shoves hard boiled eggs up his ass and immediately regrets it after ejaculating" episode

>It's an user posts a Truman show thread hoping to get replies, thinking that it's just a movie but he actually has been on a tv show and is being watched by the entire world episode

>it's an user gets depressed after thinking about the eventual heat death of the universe episode

Too real ;_;

i dont get this meme

>it's a "Truman yells while remembering an embarrassing thing that happened to him" episode
That episode really cut deep

>it's a "Truman stares at cute young boy for way too long and risks his work at the daycare" episode

>implying that will happen in our species lifetime

>it's a Truman wakes up early on a Saturday morning and watches bad horror movies he's already seen while drinking the wine he got for his birthday that he was supposed to be saving for a family dinner episode

doesn't he know he's slowly killing himself?

People insert disgusting and embarrassing stuff about themselves that they would be paranoid about the world seeing if they starred in their own voyeuristic tv show like Truman did in the movie The Truman Show, with Jim Carey.

i hate myself for explaining this to you

>it's a Truman explains memes to retards online while sitting at home drinking whiskey on a friday night episode

>it's a Truman is way too depressed and suffering from a brutal case of oneitis to even care about anything and the only "cure" is to keep doing crunches/pushups/dips/yoga until he's exhausted and passes out every night
God I hope this arc ends soon

>oneitis
>not boneitis

>it's a Truman gets catfished by an asian slut and feels infinitely worse than he did only a week before when he had accepted he might be alone forever

devastating

>it's a Truman buys women cosplay and measures his BWH lengths episode

>it's a "Truman masturbates on some rock near the beach and then notices a small but very populated area about 500m away separated from him by sea, almost shit his pants thinking there's someone who notice him and his tiny dick, dresses himself up and runs out of there" episode

good explanation, thanks

>It's a "Truman gets tired of jerking off on his weekdays home while his wife is at work and so he tries jerking the dog off for a change out of sheer boredom and isolation" episode

>It's a "Truman should give up on heterosexual relationships and get on Grindr where there will be no shortage of people for him to fuck who will totally dig his arms and abs. It's not the soft feeling of being with a woman, but it sure beats being completely alone." episode

I don't think Truman is ready for that, I hope he never is, there are way too many women out there

>Its a "Truman wakes up one morning with a day off and masturbates furiously the entire day to arab porn"

>it's a Truman can't stop jacking off to memories of fucking his ex girlfriend
I think Truman wants to move on but for some reason can't

That episode was horrifying! Especially when he tasted it.

Well of course not. The human species will have evolved into something entirely different by that time, hell, even a billion years BEFORE that happens.

>it's a Truman gets drunk and tries to suck his own dick only to pass out in the position with his pants around his ankles as his mom walks in to check on him episode

>whisky

How do you drink it straight up. It's so gross

>It's a Truman has a steady workout program & sticks to it, starts to get muscle mass & cut massive amounts of fat, looking good with his shirt off signs of abs appearing, fast forward a week of booze food & debauchery his body looks disgusting & he just wants to be lazy fuck about & eat

>It's a "Truman is especially horny in middle school and tries to fuck the family golden retriever after school before his parents get home from work but she's too tight and it doesn't fit in no matter how much he tries" episode

Drink it in a shot quickly

Down the hatch

>it's a "Truman's gf out of town and he's stuck in a loop where he cannot force himself to eat for days and cannot sleep until he starts fainting from exhaustion" episode

>Its a "Truman gets in trouble for legitimate accidental nudity at a public park"

>It's a "Truman needs to cut his man card in half because he is an utter failure of a man" episode

Pretend you're in a scene on Deadwood.

This. Do that until you can handle the burn, then learn to sip it.

>It's a why did they even tell Truman there's boats and planes if that's the only way to get out

>its a truman eats 3000 calories worth of candy and to feel some happiness and then gets depressed when he realises how fat he is

>The human species will have evolved into something entirely different by that time

Overly optimistic, we're likely one of many many evolutionary deadends

>it's a Truman drunkenly covers the entire toilet in pizza vomit and cleans it with a half-empty box of tissues, except he forgot to check the top of the seat and it dries into a hard crust overnight causing his roommate to kick him out

>It's a Truman realizes he's done nothing with his life and will do nothing with his life and shitposts on Sup Forums while drinking alcohol.

>episode

>Its a Truman stays up past 2:00 AM shitposting on a Indonesian image forum until his eyes go entirely blood shot.

Did they really have to use close-ups for the whole 5 hours?

>it's a Truman drives past his ex girlfriend's house at 4am again episode

they really got that suicidal aesthetic down

Grindr is literal hell. Women are easy if you have even a modicum of assertiveness. I'm a certifiable beta and I can have a girl any time I want.

>It's a "Truman is incredibly impressed by user's digits and wholeheartedly agrees with his take on women" episode

>It's a Truman hasn't showered in a month and has dried semen covering his enlarged belly and thighs episode

Anyone else notice the similarities between good ol Truman and Bill from King of the Hill?

>its a Truman watches that black mirror webcam masterbation episode and realizes he would rather his mother see a video of him whacking to children than the mommy joi videos he actually regularly busts to episode

I got the worst episode going on right now...
>It's a Truman gets horny and lonely again and begins watching chubby porn and decides to check out backpage and finds a cheap fat 30yr blonde escort who burns coal and is on her way to his house RIGHT NOW, but he couldn't wait much longer and decided to masturbate and as soon as he finished he realized the severity of the situation and he's probably gonna have to PAY a FAT SWEATY OLD LADY WHO SLEEPS WITH BLACK GUYS to sleep with him and there is not an ounce of alcohol around.

Screw this meme, what do, bros? SEND HELP

ABORT

Truman better lock the fucking door and pretend no one's home

you dun fucked up now son

pretend you're not home I guess

>it's "Truman can't even pretend he's not home or tell that somebody pulled off a prank on him" episode

Ask the cops to patrol your street because you saw a suspicious character walking around. Guarantee she'll bounce if she sees the fuzz

You guys don't understand how freaking beta I am, part of me still wants to feel something. I'm only 21. I'm gonna have to go through with this. She should be here soon. Should I take pics?

do it faggot

POST HER PICS

chubby is totally not my thing i swear

Yes of course
>its a select sushi rerun

Kill her, the ratings will be kino tier and the viewer at home, and maybe even Truman himself will finally have something interesting in his life.

Only thing you'll be feeling is a burning in your urethra or a beating from her black boyfriends who rob you after she scopes the place out lol

>Oh no, it's "Truman cannot understand that being a virgin is much better than sex with unsimpathetic person" episode again
They sure do love airing reruns of this shit

At least get a better sounding escort man

>that story of the eye reference
Ayyy

Kek look at this weak liberal piece of shit

>it's a Truman anally masturbates with a makeshift dildo but gets scared when his anus starts swallowing so he frantically tries to grab it but it's too lubed up so he has to poop it out episode

man what a crazy season

...

I was hooked after he started pissing on himself in the shower

>it's a "girl Truman barely knows gets really interested in him and he wonders if it's a joke because somebody actually likes him for him" episode

I will prove you wrong.

She's here. been watching more chubby piorn to get in the mood. will report later. with pics stay posted

i'll be waiting for those pics user

Interesting, I didn't know it was that bad with anons.

Loving these arc were a a girl with a bf is interested in Truman and Truman is really into her and they kissed each others' cheeks, Truman kissed her neck and forehead too, a couple of days ago but they never kissed each other in the lips, and since the semester is over Truman won't see her regularly unless they make plans but he doesn't want to pressure her because he knows she'll lose interest that way. It's funny how the whole situation just sent Truman further down the empty life hole. What's wrong with him.

Oh boy that Truman, gotta love him

Classic Truman