No offense to illumination but this just looks plain fucking stupid

no offense to illumination but this just looks plain fucking stupid

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Illumination is the Ubisoft of animation

I'm gonna see it with my family and some of their friends soon, Secret Life of Pets was shit so I have low expectations for this.

Illumination is a fucking terrible animation company that has absolutely no talent and just got extremely lucky that their fucking obnoxious minions got extremely popular.
Prove me wrong. Pro-tip: You can't.

Despicable Me 2 and Minions both grossed over a billion dollars.and looks like Life of Pets will too

They're doing something right

Illumination films are awful. Every critic who gives them positive reviews is dead to me.

Their products are soulless but still popular?

After sitting through secret life of pets with my daughter, I refuse to see anything else these fuckers make. I had a skull splitting migraine by the time it was over.

yes

Everytime I see the female pig I want to look up some rule 34 of her but I keep forgetting to

Pixar and DreamWorks getting BTFO

Illumination is Disneys only rival right now

back to plebbit

This shit feels like one of those cheap 2006ish animated movies that just came in to capitalize on a fad (like those fairytale movies in the line of Shrek).

Did every animal need to have a visible anus? Was it vital to the plot?

...

>pixar and disney
>rivals
how dense are you

>movies literally only you have seen

>le everything I hate is reddit
Ah, I moss the old days of being in the high school liberal debate team

>high school
>reddit
saying something about yourself there mate

I remember seeing that in theaters, shit was awful but the witch lady was hot.
Also Hoodwinked was annoying as fuck too.

this film looks like Full Sail University told students their final was to make an animal sing a pop song, and then they just took those finals and edited them into a movie

I don't know why but it just seems even less creative and more insulting than the Smurfs 3 or Alvin and the Chipmunks 4.

Amy Schumer has a new movie?

...

Showed Secret Life of Pets to my students as a part of an end of the semester party thing we do here in Korea.The movie the previous semester was Zootopia.

Say what you will about either of these films but Zootopia didn't completely insult my intelligence, and the kids seemed to share the same opinion.

Having seen advertisements for this it looks like a movie that would have come out in 2009. Dated song references, dated premise, just shitting looking.

...

Yo Secret Life of Pets was not bad at all. And Despicable me 1 AND 2 was pure Kino (and I went into it thinking it would be shit because everyone hates on it and minions).

This movie though, no fucking thanks.

cringed when I saw the trailer of this

The movie was ehh saw it with my gf and her stupid friend. The "fun" part of the movie was wasted in the trailer.

I liked the Koala though. Didn't think I would.

The songs were typical and the ending was tied up in a everything works in the end kinda bow.

This is better than any Minions retardation

I saw the trailer and immediately thought of Chicken Little and Barnyard.

>Barnyard
m.youtube.com/watch?v=pZ-oEuWMszs

I have no idea how secret life of pets made profit.
Is it really that easy to make a stupid kids movie?

>LOL OLD ASS SONGS SANG BY ANIMATED ANIMALS WITH FUNNY FUNNY EXPRESSIONS!!!!!!!!!!!

yeah who thought this was a good idea

See? It's Barnyard all over again, except it will never match this pure kino of a scene.

The Jews actually do run Hollywood though and make massive profits off of horrible shit like the OPs thread pic

but no, stay afraid of the Sup Forums-boogeyman

secret life of pets wasn't terrible, but the sausage factory scene was a bit baffling

Really shitty summer for movies this year, also yes to your second question.
My cousin plays movies like this and Home for her kids all the time, it's a decent 90 minute movie that will keep the kids occupied the whole time and give you some time to relax from a parenting perspective.

Why would you make milk the alcohol comparison? Because they're cows I get that but come on.

It was very well marketed. It seemed like it was gonna be interesting and cute. Should've known better from the trailer tho. The plot was garbage, that's why they kept it a secret

Because DUDE WHAT IF ANIMALS COULD TALK LMAO.

!!!

>Minions is the second highest grossing animated film of all time
>Minions made over $1.1 billion

Just what is so appealing about those little fuckers? I don't get it. I know little kids are the main audience, but there have to be some teens/adults buying into this bullshit too.

You'd be surprised what stupid shit normies put up with these days

did any of the actual voice actors sing, aside from the male pig there singing Lady Gaga? From the trailer/ads I've seen, the characters all just lip sync as the movie plays the actual songs

I haven't seen but I'm guessing the plot goes something like this:
>singing competition is a scam or there's something dishonest about it
>all the people who try out think it's earnest
>eventually the secret is found out by the animals trying out
>they're all "what the fuck bro?" and bail
>but somehow they manage to look past the lie and come together to Sing™ (2016) in the end

I forgot who voiced who, But what I remember.

Seth MacFarlane who plays Mike the Mouse sings
The Porcupine rocker girl sings
The two pigs sing
The Elephant girl at the end sings
The Gorilla sings
And thats all I remember

The "Now That's What I Call Music" of film.

>dumb americans love talking CGI animals
>dumb americans love singing competitions

pretty much it

>those small budgets
>those huge returns

I tend to enjoy the tryouts most, and this movie seems to gloss over it by making it obvious which characters will get through

I hope you realize this shitty trend started in the UK

yeah because only americans love illumination entertainment and shitty cgi

>inb4 muh world vs 1 country and ignoring the equal gross of inside out

So did America.

My cousin babysits for this kid who watches an animated Spider-Man movie on Netflix as his sole purpose of entertainment. He's seen it at least fifty times. Kids don't really give a shit if a movie lacks substance and looking back, I don't think I did either.

Inside Out sucked though

I like the idea of a creature that's only purpose is to be subservient to something else.

But It's literally just because they're "cute" and their appeal crosses language boundaries. I have students that have given themselves names like "Kevin" because of minions.

Can confirm, I watched the Sonic OVA and Good Boy! a shitload of times while in the car growing up.

>but there have to be some teens/adults buying into this bullshit too.
These people are the worst. Don't they realise that they're just fast food mascots with a slightly tweaked design?

youtube.com/watch?v=gSZsRfwpqJo

I've watched a kid who would demand the Cars movie be playing at all times while he played with his toys.

my son loves these shits. i don't see the appeal either.

>Realise the only reason people like your bland kids movie is the retarded, yellow jelly beans that make fart noises
>Realise you still make a profit without paying out the ass for some celebrity like Carell

Illumination has coasting down to an art form.

>big name celebrity gets phased out of his own movie franchise by jibbering yellow jellybeans farting
>the state of Carell

Actually surprised by this.

It's all so tiresome.

this literally looks like the most focus grouped movie i've ever seen. there's no artistic intention whatsoever. say what you will about Disney but at least they're willing to make a movie about polynesian demigods and german folk tales

JUST how long until he's licking his wounds with our boy Brendan?

I would have expected this movie to bomb, but people are stupider than I thought, because Secret Life of Pets was a huge hit. Makes me want to puke.

He won't fall that far unless he marries a whore who will divorce him and take everything from him

>And Despicable me 1 AND 2 was pure Kino
I stopped reading right there. They were mediocre at best. The minions were actually the best part, but it's only because the rest of the movies are so bad.

What the fuck happened to Ronald McDonald?

I want to kill every single person in that studio.

I hate how the trailer for this movie practically shows the whole film.