>Be me, about 15 years ago >Work in local convenience store, not a big chain, don't even have a gas pump, just a mom & pop deal >Late shift, stocking drink shelves >Woman walks in, holding adult son's hand >Definite tard shuffle >"Pick out a snack davey." >tard flumps over to snack aisle >picks up bag, throws aside >picks up another bag, same chips, throws aside >itkeepshappening.jpg >consider saying something, think 'fuck it, I'll pick them up after' >picks up what must be seventh or eighth bag at this point >gives it a really good look over >licks the bag >starts shoving it in his mouth like he can taste the pictures >fuckthewat.gif >gets two-thirds of the bag in his mouth before it pops >"Okay, that's the one you get davey." >tardrage.exe >throws the bag on the ground >"DUEANT WAOUNT CHIIEPS" >chips fucking everywhere >starts jumping up and down on all the bags he threw on the floor >Pop Pop Pop >mom looks at tard, looks at me, looks back at tard >I'm guessing not her first tard rodeo >tard goes for more bags >she grabs his hand and rushes out the door >oh hell no >me chasing them out the door >she gets into her son in the tardwagon and screeches out the door >fuckmylife.mp4 >go back in, get broom and start sweeping up huge mess >round the corner, see something >she left her purse >cue shit eating grin (To be continued)
Continued >take purse to back office, wait >20 minutes later, tardwagon comes screeching back in >enter angry tardmom >"YOU STOLE MY PURSE, GIVE IT BACK" >"actually, you left it behind while you were running out without paying for all this" >"I'M CALLING THE COPS!" >"I'm sure they'll be happy to review the security camera footage" >total bluff >it works, all the color drains from her face >she takes a different tack >leans on counter >"Look, maybe we can work something out..." >oh my god, she's not serious >she's serious >fuckingnope.jpg >"Yeah, you pay $100 for the chips and damage and I don't press charges." >she straightens up >"Fine. Give me my purse and I'll pay you." >not falling for it >I go back and pull her card out >"The ATM's right over there" >mixture of anger and defeat >she pulls out the money, I give her the purse >"Fuck you" >"Have a wonderful evening ma'am." >Pocketed $75 that night, whistling the whole time I sweep up chips.
Jace Richardson
How would you facilitate the end of a tard?
Hudson Rodriguez
Sterilization at birth. Much as I may care about my work, they needn't breed.
Kevin Parker
Okay, I'll go >be me >walking around at mall >train ride coming from opposite direction >full of tards with ice cream cones >making stupid "choo choo" noises >one drops his cone >"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" >jumps out of the caboose car, pushes it over, starts eating the cone off the ground >other tards start "REEEE"ing >security comes >they all get kicked out
Connor Sullivan
Or just one in particular? Plenty of ways, but I was thinking more a solution than a giggle.
Wyatt Moore
worst tard you ever had to deal with? I mean like "lowest."
Juan Mitchell
bump
Juan Parker
how much does it pay? >inb4 "Not enough"
Colton Jones
I work with ALL of them, the chip story op posted I've seen happen before. However I'll be fucked if an adult kid under my care gets away with that, I'll have them on the ground by bag 3 being tossed lmao. Not violently, just restrained until he could shut the fuck up about chips. Shame on that mother for not controlling her hellion.
Landon Martinez
Should have asked to rent tards butthole for the night instead
Juan Rodriguez
missed opportunity
Ryan Davis
Fuck all, I make what the fast food slaves are demanding lately. Really isn't enough for how good of service I provide but I'll fix it soon, making sure I get a raise soon.
Zachary Evans
Jesus, I don't know if I could put up with that for $15 an hour. The smell alone.
Levi Sanchez
Tell stories about restraining them!! Does it work? Is it like holding down a hyper dog?
Ethan White
I've always called a group of tards a gaggle, is that the right terminology?
Ian Bennett
I AM the tard story. My sister has downs syndrome and is 2 years younger than me It's rough
You do a good service for the people
Logan Ramirez
Tits?
Angel Price
I got a story >be me at local movie theater >in walks tard with family, looks normal >appearances can be deceiving >they sit down a few rows ahead of me, couple minutes later, previews begin >preview for It 2 >tard apparently scared of clowns >screams at the top of his lungs >parents trying to calm him down >tard is having none of that >grabs popcorn, throws at screen >grabs soda, throws at screen >starts grabbing anything he can get his hands on >usher enters theater >parents still trying to restrain him >tard strength for days >throws parents off, literally fucking pounces on the usher, knocks him on his ass, runs out the theater >parents and usher follow >so do I >tard is wrecking promotional displays all over theater >pushing over candy machines >anything that isn't nailed down is a target >cops arrive >one of them has a tazer >bullseyes tard >tard convulses and eventually goes limp >parents crying >MFW
why did you become a tard wrangler? do you regret it, and why/why not? what are the number one best and worst parts of your job?
Austin Fisher
Here's one that happened about a year ago. You'll never guess where I was: >Am literally surrounded by fucking mongaloids >they all start REEEE'ing together and flail their arms around as if there were hallucinations on the ceiling. >The tards quiet down, and their leader gets up, and starts talking... >"Glar ee to dih lar don hi" >MFW I realize that I'm at church
>be in high school >powerchair tard evades wranglers >runs full speed into me >wtflolsorry >wrangler catches up and gives me dirty looks >this happens three more times >get called into principles office >apparently I'm bullying the whirrtard >almost get suspended because I'm kind of a problem kid >point out to principle that in all my troubles, I never lied to him >point out cameras in every hall >tell him to check them >I don't get suspended or even in trouble >whirrtard runs into me again next week >they baited him with me to see if I was honest >apologies for days, got some grades bumped up >mfw getting bullied by a nearly nonfunctional whirrtard made it so I graduated on time
Guys help I like ceramics but i hate these fucking autists, theres like 2 in fucking wheelchairs that just scream constantly how the fuck are they even alive
>new nurse at group home (tard house). >this one tard fucks this stuffed bunny all the time. >noonetellsher.jpeg >she gets her had covered in moldy rotting tard jizz moving the bunny. >quits
Kevin Lewis
Nah bro, I got witnesses that I got tard bullied. Also why would I lie about getting bullied by a jellobrain?
Lincoln Allen
Find another class time retard. Maybe you're one of them
I could never do that. I have no patience, they would all end up murdered and me in prison.
Jeremiah Watson
why don't you get a better job?
Christopher Long
>be me 15 >buy high powered .22 pellet hand gun >try to to the spinning revolver trick >realize it loaded, Fuck.jpeg >it goes off and shoots me right above the dick burrowing about half an inch under my skin >start beading everywhere, dig at the wound but cant get it out >give up after an hour and put ab band aid on it. >6 years later and its still in me the pellets were made of lead so maybe thats why im retarded
how hard is tard wrangling. could i get hired with no drivers licence ?
Logan Gray
top keks
Brody Howard
Sounds like you were retarded all along.
Hudson Stewart
Nigger tards are like albino everything else. Weird how that works.
Gabriel Jenkins
1/2 >be me >17, ran away from home >had a good sob story so got in with some local program that gives homeless kids a bedroom to sleep in at night as long as they go to school or work >downside is i only had a "home" from 6pm to 10am so every other hour i wasnt at work, i hung out at the mall >eventually notice tardette >30 something years old, acts like a 16 year old weeb girl. walked her puppet dog around and would even have it respond to people >she was real serious about it too. shed pause a conversation to bark and act as if it were genuinely the puppet, and would get upset or scared of people who mistreated it >when she wasnt doing that, shed go around most of the stores every day >repeatedly asked for jobs at some of them, just talked to people at others. some people were polite, some were blatantly uncomfortable >eventually tardette notices that im also always at the mall >bad times ensue >starts off with her ALWAYS tracking me down and sitting with me/following me everywhere all day >literally never stopped talking, always about weird tard shit. either anime n shit she liked, or oversharing about how shes super mentally and physically fucked up because her mom had her as a super young teen, and that it was hidden from her until her twenties so she spent most of her life thinking her grandma was her mom and her mom was only her sister >she loudly discussed all of this with me in a public mall, usually a coffee shop, despite my attempts to quietly just play on my laptop and ditch her >try to be nice to her because shes just a tard and i know shes not torturing me on purpose >she stalks me for months, even finding me when i start going to other farther locations to avoid her
Elijah Scott
2/2 >eventually just try to humor her >unfortunately, this lead to the mistake of going to a tard dance >literally a dance for tards, was set up in some big empty community room at the public rec centre, had a pool/library/etc >she never specified it was a TARD dance, and im probably retarded myself so i didnt put it together >she just asked me to come with her to a dance when i was already at the point of just entertaining her to not be that guy who mistreated some dumb oblivious tard lady >assume itll be like a high school dance but with a family friendly spin and a bunch of normies, mostly imagining white moms and kids >mfw we enter a room full of tards and wranglers with music playing pretty quietly from some cheap plastic speaker. >fortunately nothing too serious happened but i was pretty terrified >there were a couple melt downs, one guy was just walking up to people and really aggressively asking the same pointless question over and over until a wrangler shushed him, then hed just start again. >tardette drags me to this festival of tards, then sits down and explains she cant actually dance or stand too long because of her physical disabilities >spend about an hour sitting on plastic chairs pretending to have an engaging conversation with tardette to avoid interacting with any worse tards >some are barely functional, gurgling and screaming from time to time while they sit off to the side and tard wranglers say nice things to them to make them feel included >some tards are tard dancing which is pretty hilarious, mostly bouncing/bobbing up and down and flailing >the experience is slow and uncomfortable, but eventually its over >hid in the corner with tardette the whole time and leave as soon as i get the opportunity without being a dick >start traveling further and further away from home to avoid tardette, works a little better once i start wasting an hour a day on the bus >shit sucked but at least its years behind me, havent seen her in ages
Zachary Gomez
shoulda fucked her
Daniel Ramirez
It's a common misconception but I have it on good authority that tards come in storms.
Josiah Martinez
wuz tardette fuckable? y u no smash ?
Luis Green
Honestly, the ones like her make me sad because they can kind of function.
The ones that just scream or get aggressive should be euthanized.
John Cook
>be me, in highschool, average sophomore >eating lunch >see tard wranglers wrangling tards toward tard room >one breaks from the tard chain gang >starts running >one wrangler takes off after him, the other two take the rest of the kids back to class >minutes pass, relatively quiet >tard bursts back into lunchroom, completely naked, swinging his pants over his head >"AAAAAOOOOOOAAAAAAOOOOOAAAAAAOOOOO" >thinks he's a fucking cop car maybe >poor bastard wrangler stumbling in after him holding rest of clothes >"no no no put your clothes back on" >tard keeps running circles around the lunchroom >eventually school security tackles the tard >wrangler gets reprimanded in front of half the school >tard gets picked up by parents, still naked and grinning like a subnormal jack-o-lantern >MFW
she was hideous, annoying, and more than twice my age. just being around her made me uncomfortable and upset. if i even considered smashing, id probably get ptsd yeah i always tried to be nice to her cause i felt bad, sucked being nice bit me in the ass though, kinda wish i started hiding farther away sooner cause bad memories, but she claimed i was her best friend and always seemed to want to support and make me happy so i can respect that. sucked cause her presence alone was something i really didnt wanna be around so eventually cut ties anyways, but under the retardation she was a very hurt person just trying to have a friend. tragic, really, but yeah definitely would not have been as patient if she was a screamer. >really scrawny and always hunched over, she had a disability or something with her bones so she kinda hobbled around. her body/movement had a kinda uncanny valley to it cause things were just slightly out of place. had that sort of mouth that was always wide open and you could see all her upper gums/teeth, very long rectangular head, red hair. kinda like if gollum was really long and stretched out, walked with a limp, and dressed up in a wig/in drag
Brandon Smith
>Standing outside Walmart waiting for family >Light up a smoke >As I'm puffing I notice this older woman is walking rather rigidly >Oh, she's tarded >I can feel the vibes coming off her, she's going to talk to me >She starts walking towards me >Fuck! >She looks at me and says "Wow" >Oh god, is she hitting on me? >"You look hot" she says >"Thanks?" I replied >"You're very muscular, huh?" >Fat guy tip: Wear baggy clothing, it hides your rolls >I unzipped my hoodie and pulled my shirt around my fat gut and said "Nah, not really" >"Oh" she replied "You're fat..." >Being called fat by an old tarded lady, my self confidence could not get any lower >"So, you into older women? You have a girlfriend?" she says >"Well... I- uhhhh.." struggling to find words, I mean she's an old tarded lady, I didn't want to make her freak out, but I didn't exactly want a date either >What happened next was nothing short of a miracle >One of her tarded friends runs up to her and starts crying >Old tarded lady turns around to console her friend >mfw walking back into walmart
>be me 12 y/o >this teenage tardette wants to suck my dick >she only has minor gobblin face. body is alright/10 >didn't do it because afraid of getting in trouble >regret not doing it to this day.
Ryder Long
i would of just done it with the lights off
Andrew Wood
I like to call a group of tards “a mustard”
Carson Thompson
When I was in high school I took hairstyling as an option, there was a this retard in my class and she would fucking cry and smash her head on the wall if she couldn’t get a braid right and when it came time for us to start cutting hair I was genuinely concerned at the fact they were gunna give this mongoloid scissors, but instead the teacher cut the hair for her giving her an A and she started making fun of the rest of us non retards learning and getting not A’s and I got mad and told her she will never be a real hair dresser cause she’s a full blown retard and no one in their right mind would let her near their hair that’s why she wasn’t allowed to cut even a maniquins hair. i hated her, she was so loud and would drool all over herself constantly. She would also eat during class and would chew like a cow.
Jason Ward
lmao what was her reaction to you telling her shed never be a hairdresser?
Jace Morales
She cried and called me mean and I got Suspended
Isaiah Morales
That sounds like a reasonable price to pay to put an entitled little shit in their place
