I turn 36 on Friday

I turn 36 on Friday.
I've got a good job, pays me well.
No family, no friends, just my cat.
Partner of 12 years and I separated a year ago.
No meaningful relationships since.
All I have now is work, home, eat, sleep, repeat.
Don't know why I'm posting or what I'm posting.
Just kinda giving up I guess.

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im sorry user but no one cares
i havent left my house in 10 years, but im a pussy so i cant kill myself yet. life doesnt get better so you die or live another 40 years like that

find a hobby that ur passionate about and join a club with like minded people

whether is watching anime thots or firing muskets in reenactment groups, theres prob something for you

and if u dont know what that is, try everything until you do

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How do you deal with the isolation?

Go to Thailand. Change your life.

If you’ve had a ltr in the past you can do it again. Put yourself out there.

Moved out at 19- 29 now. Took 1 week off 10 years ago. Over Time every week (loyal wagecuck that doesnt get sick) I smoke amazing shit everyday, might get laid once a year. Past relationships were mental and financial drains. Just wait for legalized prostitution.

Well, first off OP. Sup Forums is filled with people who are just like you or a lot worse so coming here for advice was a terrible idea. BUT, you can try and get some hobbies or go travelling that would be the obvious first step to finding happiness. At 36 you're still able to do pretty much everything a 20 year old can so go and enjoy what you enjoy most. Maybe find another chick to fuck as well.

Alles wird gut Sascha.

It's gonna bee okay user

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you just have to realize that even people who have a lot of "social life" feel isolated, people always feel alone.
wanting to die even when you have people around you is the same as wanting to die without anyone around

> I turn 36 on Friday.

42yofag here. Welcome to the golden years, user. If you’ve got a car and some money you’ve just entered the young pussy pro-am tournament circuit. Get onto tinder and anything sleazier and you will find yourself swimming in young girls looking to fuck. Find your inner daddy and if you can’t, like me, learn how to act like one and the world is your oyster starting now. Godspeed, user.

Seems like I’m headed down this road, still with my SO but i feel it’s going to end eventually. What caused the separation or what was the “final straw”.

If you have the money you can pick up literally anything. Get into game dev, download some easy engine like construct II, learn how to 3D model, draw, do clay models and post them on instagram, take a fucking course, get out of the house man. Life doesn't have meaning because you're not giving it meaning.

Get into some weird music genre that has a community around it, attend concerts, play with your wardrobe, make yourself interesting. Friends are gonna come with that.

>I've got a good job, pays me well.
That's a plus, at least you're independent and still not living at your moms
>No family, no friends, just my cat.
I can understand how that loneliness can eat at you, I was a hikki/NEET for years without any social interaction but I still had my mom. You still get the required socialization through your work so it's not all over
>Partner of 12 years and I separated a year ago.
Sorry I can't relate to relationships so I have no input on that
>All I have now is work, home, eat, sleep, repeat.
You're trapped in a cycle I'd recommend following advice and meeting people through your interests, perhaps try and make friends through work
>Just kinda giving up I guess.
It's still kinda though isn't it? So you're still hanging on. Look you've had love in the past and that would've provided happiness maybe try and pursue a relationship, like going to events, pubs, social media etc. It could help fill that void.

Best of luck

Relationship of 6 years ended 3 years ago. Had one hook up since.

Femanon here, I just wanna say that any obscure or odd hobby is attractive to girls, and you don't even have to be good to impress "the average person"

The Average Person has not spent any time specializing in anything, if you spend 20 minutes learning something you're already 20 minutes better than TAP.

If you learn about a specific subject that interests you, you're already more well versed in that topic than TAP.

There is so much that you can do that you're not seeing, and any guy that is even better than average at a specific thing, especially if it is within the realm of creativity, is super attractive. It's an icebreaker, it's intriguing, it gives you more personality, a group of likeminded people to bond with, and it gives you something to spend your time with. Do you have anything that interests you?

>tinder

Tinder sucks. Or maybe I don't know how to use it. Seems too simple to me. You swipe, and that's it. Easy to lose pics you like.

> Or maybe I don't know how to use it.

Much, much better success with super likes and I barely bother with girls over 25. “27, works in finance, skis” fucking forget it “18, meme queen, Arkham Asylum” automatic super like.

1yr younger and same birthday as you, user bro. In a slightly better spot, but only just. I'm sorry someone who dedicated that much time to you didn't work out, and yeah, with that much time invested, it's gonna suck for awhile. You'll feel empty, hollow, alone. But eventually you'll move on, it's just a question of when. But as others said, you have to get out and do something before you'll actually meet someone else - and in this day and age, that includes social shit on PCs, you don't necessarily have to leave your house. I found my SO in fucking Second Life of all places almost 10 years ago, still going strong.
Find something YOU like to do and then with luck you'll find someone who also like that, so you have a solid starting foundation to rebuild with. Good luck bro.

I have clinical depression and social anxiety, and one of the things I heard recently from a speaker at a TEDtalk has really helped me gain perspective which I hope to be able to put into practice. He said that depression often comes from being in a negative situation (like you said with your rut you've gotten into). So I would advise getting off of Sup Forums and taking time to introspect and maybe do something unexpected if you can like visiting somewhere new or just trying a new way of living. Either way, godspeed user, I hope you make it.

> I have clinical depression and social anxiety

I’ve had tremendous success with conquering depression by getting a series of six IV ketamine treatments last winter and subsequent boosters every 2-3 months.

I thought ketamine was horse tranquiliser?

Love it when people realize they've already won the game of life, only to find out the game was barely worth it to begin with

Nope.

Welcome to life. At 24 basically experiencing the same shit. I felt more fulfilled with ample drugs and a shitty job than I do now.

> I thought ketamine was horse tranquiliser?

It’s a dissociative hallucinogen that fundamentally and quickly changes human consciousness. My bff is getting her doctorate so she can open a clinic and I’ve been reading mad clinical papers on how effective it is not just for depression, but also PTSD and alcoholism. I think we’re just scratching the surface in terms of potential.

You guys haven't won yet.
If you're unhappy and suffering, you haven't won yet. There's more.

>girls over 25.

I don't think that will work for me. I'm 40+

Jesus, why don't we have an advice board?

Anyway, you need to get laid. Or just start dating. A woman showing interest in you will help you perk up. Leave your house and talk to people.

why not get a young cutie to dress her up and make her an obedient toy to wait for you at home and suck you off when she's not having much to do at college

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Hey, don't underestimate your impact on the world. Even if you just think about your cat. If it wasn't for you, it would likely be dead, or on the street. Buy human companionship when you feel you need it (or want it). You can have a fulfilling life just taking care and loving pets throughout your life. Hang in there, OP.

> I don't think that will work for me. I'm 40+

I’m 42. This is the best time. Don’t go for the 25+ girls. They’re generally looking for relationships. A lot of younger ones will fuck if you take them on a nice date. Is really easy to get younger “sugar babies” to give it up for free as they learn the ropes of prostitution. You’re gold, user.

I'd really rather have a relationship.

Stay strong user

> I'd really rather have a relationship.

Literally last week I would have called you out for utter fucking faggotry, but I met my soulmate on a raunchy hookup site and finally met up with a girl who is incredibly not a catfish after months of enchanting texting, so I get it. Good luck, and know that sometimes you find diamonds in the garbage.

Check'd

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Shit... I always do my best in life when I'm flying solo. Last time i was single and living alone I was ripped physically, excelling like crazy at work, brand new car and motorcycle in the driveway.... loving life. Had to fuck it all up by getting married.

start drinking

Nah cant. Growing anti western sentiments due to the whole US china shitshow

Try charcoal. Its the easiest way out. KYS was never that easy

Find some friends user. It helps. Find like minded individuals. For example maybe hang out in a comic and card store if you like intellectual types. In other words pursue your interests and friends will follow. If you have no interests, that is why you are depressed. You need to sit down and decide what it is you enjoy doing and do that. Pretend suicide isnt an option and you have to make this work... What will you do for fun?

I'm turning 28 soon. I have a good job, 130k, which is pretty good (even in san francisco).

virginal as fuck. never even flirted with a girl, haven't left my house for 3 months for any reason other than to go to the office for work.

VR porn and marijuana might be able to save me. don't even know what to expect in the future. I'm also definitely not getting a girlfriend any time soon, I have no idea what it's even like to socialize. At least I'm not starving, so there's something

Dude, I was in the same sitch as you until I was 40 then got married to a chick who had been divorced for a few years and had kids. There are times I'd give anything to be single again, living on my own with just my dog, playing video games and doing whatever I want whenever I want. Enjoy the SHIT out of these times OP.

I just lost The Game

All of your suffering comes from your desires.
Learn to be ok with what you have, stop constantly wanting more or thinking that having more will make you happy, because it won't. Try to understand that we evolved to have these constant desires for more, better relationships, more money, and so on so the species would survive. We did not evolve to be happy, or to find happiness, and even when good things happen and we are successful the good feelings that come from it are fleeting and do not last. Its just the human condition, you will suffer, you will want better things than you can have, and you will not see what you have now as enough. Recognize this and control it. Eliminate desires and eliminate suffering.

This is pretty much me but I make about 1/5 of that and live in a shithole.

my question to you is; what was your life like leading up to this.

You can always go the gay way.

Give your life to Jesus

Buy a Miata

I'm 38. Decent job. No friends. No pets. Just my computer. Don't have a waifu or GF. No meaningful relationships. All I do is eat, sleep, work repeat.

I can save money. I own my house. I own my car. I can eat whatever I want. Freedom usually comes with loneliness..

Get good at tolerating yourself. Noone else is going to love you if you yourself don't think you are awesome.

3 step program:
Gym. Work out. Just fucking do it.
Hobbies. Train your brain. Just fucking do it.
Community. Interaction breeds creativity. Collaborate and fucking do it. With another human being. Like, penis in the vagina style.

Feeling good ain't rocket science. Stop whining and get going.

money will make a difference. at the risk of angering SJWs on twitter, learn to code.

i went to a remote class (Hack Reactor) and learned JavaScript. 1 year (14 months to be exact) later I'm making 130k. going from a full-blown NEET to this job was pretty crazy. i still find it weird that I have a higher salary than the vast majority of people in the richest country in the world.

just 18 months ago, i would go to HEB at 4 am to get a bucket of ice cream and a box of frozen corndogs just to binge on it back at my place while watching let's plays, and then passing out at 8 am while feeling sick from binging on that shit. I did that every day for over a year when my depression hit particularly hard, and my parents were paying for all of it.

for how long did you study it before you got a job? how much practice per day? just curious

the actual bootcamp class is legitimately all day. if you attend a bootcamp (a good one, at least), you will have no free time for 3 months. it's intense, but doable if you're willing to work hard.

once it was over, I would go through periods of slacking a little, but still, probably 2-3 hours a day practicing coding, writing scripts, watching tutorials, reading random things, doing problems on leetcode, etc. The more exposed myself to programming, the more I slowly connected the dots in my head.

It's a little funny, when I graduated from the bootcamp, I thought, "damn, I know a lot". But after 6 months of learning more and more I realized, "Wow, 6 months ago, I barely knew shit". If you really grind, you can pass a difficult interview (I'm talking google, microsoft, etc.) 6 months after graduation - that's if you honestly grind your ass off everyday.

The problem is getting your foot in the door. even if you're smart enough, if you're new, google/microsoft/apple/twitch/airbnb, etc. will NOT talk to you. big companies don't care about new engineers. You'll very likely have to settle for a small, sloppy, inefficient startup that will likely dissolve within a year. my first job was a 3-month contract gig at a blockchain startup, it was a shit show, and now I'm pretty sure it's dissolved. I also only got that job because I know someone who knows one of the co-founders.

Again, the hardest part is just getting your foot in the door. I had a series of lucky things in that I had just enough experience for a recruiter to contact me on linkedin about the job i work at now. he interviewed me, and I did very well because I grinded (also, admittedly, the interview was not very hard).

Even then, it wasn't over. I initially got a rejection because they went with a more senior candidate. But that senior candidate backed out at the last minute (companies ALWAYS prefer senior candidates), so they contacted me with an offer of 125, negotiated it to 130.

Then go to the Philippines...my buddy has gone 3 or 4 times in the last year...loves it, and has a cute younger gf. Hes 38. Just get out and do something.

thanks for answering, so basically hard work/grinding + a little bit of random luck, maybe I could do this if I actually tried

everything has seasons, you’re just in a drought. There’s always a return, and there’s always something new that comes along. Keep pushing on, broaden your horizons.
There are many people that have families and responsibilities that wish they had the time to do things.
find a hobby, go traveling, invest extra income for retirement.
you have no idea where life will take you, and you’ve got a lot more of it left.
make the most of it OP

buy a doll

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if you're smart, you can 100% do this. even some of the low achievers from my bootcamp have decent jobs. there's a saying from bloomberg, "the harder you work, the luckier you get," and it's 100% true.

that being said, it helps a lot to know people in the industry. I am a friendless neet so I benefited from my brother being in the business before me and knowing people.

hey oldfags, are there some age milestones in life, as in "by the time you are X years old you should've experienced this and that" or is that all just a bunch of bullshit and age doesn't matter that much after you turn 18?

thanks for your answers and for motivating me user, I will be much more serious in my future IT endeavors

not an oldfag, but there's is a limited amount of truth to it. a lot of normies feel that way about sex, I feel that way about working hard.

for example, some people will say, "you have to have had a girlfriend and gotten laid by the time you turn 18". I didn't and normies think it's weird and that I'm pathetic/whatever. But I think pulling a long night at the office and staying until 10:30, working continuously until you feel your brain has shriveled up and you can't process information anymore is kind of a rite of passage into adulthood. There are many normies that don't know what that feels like, or what it feels like to finally flop down on your bed back at your place and think, "I worked HARD today, I EARNED the right to sleep for the night."

depends on your values, I guess

Nicee one..Elon Musky..

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You're definitely going to make it. We're ALL going to make it.

Leads you to a free watch, I dont understand

kill yourself then fag