You come home after work

>you come home after work
>find this on your floor
>what do Sup Forums?

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Sup Forums pass the fuck out of everyone

Pay a homeless man to poop on my chest

anticipate the arrival of a guy with a bowl cut and a cattle stunner sent to kill me

Scan every bill with a blacklight.

I wonder who spilled the kindling on the floor. After cleaning it up, I use some to start a fire in my fireplace.

I am sure you can get that for free

>pay off my car
put the remainder in low fee index funds.

Get killed by the mafia, get chopped up and fed to pigs, and my case will go cold until 5 years later where my finger bone turns up in some mulch.

Thank you. I really hate recaptcha

youtube.com/watch?v=lGEneRIiO1w

Move as fast as I can

hide it all over my house and spend it on video games/guns

know that i cant immediately put it into the bank. i have to avoid taxes. think about using 1200 to start a business like a laundrymat or arcade to filter my money

post pic on Sup Forums askin for ideas

>Thinks $1,200 can start a business like a laundromat

Confirmed underage. Watches YouTube videos online and thinks of starting a laundromat and thinks he can for a measly 1.2k

topkek

i meant to put another 0

double nigger

Wonder who the fuck wants me to kill somebody or if the person who left that stack is coming back.

eat a bowl of eggs

just realized i fucked my math

Call the police

take it and hide it somewhere else before whomever left it there comes back.

Cocaine and hookers

Chuckle to myself as I pick up the petty cash one of my children must have dropped while heading out the door.

checking the house number again

if(housenumber == true)
party>hard
else
take>run

Pay bills, buy new car

Spend them one at a time so there won't be a investigation trail.

scared that some relative has died and left it by will. any other thought is likely to be morally twisted.

realize that this is as close as I will ever get to my fantasy of an orgy with benjamin franklin clones

Find what op. I didnt find shit motherfucker.

Change it to Yuan quickly

wonder who left a digital image of a stack of $100 bills on my floor, and how that's even possible to just have a floating image

and then realize i must be in VR, wake up, and escape the simulation, locking eyes with god himself

First action: DUCK. Hit the floor.
Look for the guy with the gun hoping to get the drop on me. If not in the room,look for signs of breaking an entering by whoever left it. I will expect them to come back.

Check all of them for counterfeiting, marks, etc.
Put somewhere safe.
If no one comes asking about it for about a year, think about declaring it as gambling winnings or something.

>look up
>see a very energetic white guy in a ridiculous looking suit
>hear in a cheesy, over-dramatic voice
>"Congratulations, you're our NEW WINNER!!!"

buy two dollar bill and realize i am homeless

What's that, maybe 10 grand? Grocery money

Quit my job

Count it

If I knew how to launder money, and that's a big if, other means would already be at my disposal.
youtube.com/watch?v=tfvoOEa1OOI

Give it to the TV preacher

immediately wonder if the money has enough weight to be put into a bag and tied to my ankle so that i can kill myself in the river

if not, go hunting around the house for change

I’m going to Vegas

"Well, I guess you could say I feel like a million bucks!"
>laugh track

I notify the cyber police and see if they can back trace it.

The money is dirty and I would assume the guy who left it will be back for it, so I'd hold it for awhile. If they come back, hand it back, expect a fee for holding it, but give it back since people kill others for less, so no questions, just get it out of my life. No one comes back then it's dirty so I spend time cleaning it through various means, maybe spend more time to make it legal (which means taxes) and use it for a big purchase.

Then what if God hands you 50k?

And then he takes his cock out and asks you how bad you need the money while a fat camera guy is recording.

More than that, maybe 30k give or take, I'm not autistic enough to count.

First thing I do is do a post on here and ask what do I do if I find 50k in cash in my house.

That stack is atleast 4x bigger than what a stack of 10grand would look like.
Those are 100s, youd need 100 bills to make 10000, but heres what that amount of paper would look like.

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I fucking hate niggers.

This guy has actually seen 50k in cash.
Here is a comparative set of 600 bills stacked upon one another, look at how much closer the size relates

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scoop it up and hide it in a shoebox

I finally get to make this post, but I won't deliver.

>Well, about 6 months ago I told you faggots I was in line to inherit 50 million dollars from my stillborn cousin who sexually assaulted me at coney island when I was a kid. After a good lengthy amount of legal, signing papers and waiting for shit. It's official. I am one of the richest Mother Fuckers on Sup Forums. A lot of you were begging for shit from the last time, but I may make someone's day right now. Roll quads get $20,000

> (You)
>I fucking hate niggers.
Reverse image search.

How will your finger bone be compared to ur dna

It's all on file with the DMV from the RealID act now.

call the apropriate authorities and hand them over the money

>Make sure its real
>check exchange rate
>have a wank?

Give it to my mistress and tell her to Find the nearest bookie and put 100,000 dollars on a nigger a sold a rock and when I win, then I get shot in the face by my brothers goon. Which leaves a wholly unsatisfying ending to my "critically acclaimed" movie that is garbage

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first thing i do is yell "YACKITY-SCHMACKITY DOO", and then i wonder if anyone heard it

then i deal with the money

Your DNA is on file.
You dont believe me?
When you were born, they took your fingerprint, and pretty much all of the genetic material you were born from, they also took samples of blood to register your blood type, and check for diseases that could end up affecting you later in life.
They keep the file, in this file is your name, a general genetic profile, your blood type, allergies, and risk factors to name a few.
Bone marrow which is located in the center of all bones, is a soft spongy material, it's extremely genetically viable, as Gene's from ancient relatives several hundred thousand years ago were harvested using similar methods.
This makes you extremely identifiable, as long as you're genetically well documented.

>burn it on camera
>masturbate on the ashes
>smirk with my joker make up at the camera
>"Take that, Hitler!" I say, as I destroy the symbol of capitalism, and therefore white supremacy

Put it in my safe

Ive found this much money i turned it in. Large enough that cops couldnt touch without questions coming up. Got it 3months later after posting an ad and everything. Payed off my car and moved out of state.