What Hogwarts house would you be in Sup Forums?

What Hogwarts house would you be in Sup Forums?

I thought Gryffindor had all the fire bush

>gryffindor full of moralfags
>ravenclaw for fedora tippers
>hufflepuff: literal who house
Based Slytherin of course

Rowling's depiction of the Irish was very problematic

slytherin 100%

fuck mudbloods

none because i'm not a libcuck clinton voter from tumblr

Me? I'd sort this thread into the house of "dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises". Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

>slytherin: butthurt edgelords

Slytherin would be the fedora tippers, Ravenclaw was just regular nerds

Hufflepuff with the other losers i guess.

which makes me wonder was hufflepuff made fun of by other hogwarts students like how everyone mocks hufflepuff in real life?

Whichever one has the best smelling farts and is willing to sit on my face

not the same poster but I could totally imagine gryffindor being the moralchumps or chads, ravenclaw would be the fedora-tipping nerds who get really autistic about magic games, and slytherin would be the edgy *teleports behind u* group

YOURE RIGHT ON TIME
YEAH YOURE RIGHT ON TIME

what do farts smell like haha

christ you sound like an insecure faggot

ravenclaw is where all the tumblrites put themselves

it would be insufferable

ravenclaw, I guess

Hufflecuck: bland drones with no personality, basically magic leftovers
Redditclaw: bazinga!! lol, I'm such a nerd xDDDD
Shitleryn: I'm bored of spending daddy's money, let's go lynch some mudbloods
Griffynpoor: what the fuck did you just fucking say about me? fight me right now, punk, not online, I'll fuck you up. you talking to me?

God Bless You desu

>OP's image
>Slytherin>Hufflepuff>Ravenclaw>Gryffindor

Slytherin. I tend towards being an elitist dick.

>scaly, probably aylium, hufflepuff hermoine

slytherin proud

Hufflepuff because you can basically do whatever you want and no one expects anything out of you. If you're Ravenclaw everyone expects you to hit the books everyday and that sucks dicks because you can't have any fun. If you're Slytherin they expect you to be evil so the cops are always watchin' your shit, waitin' for you to fuck up like you are. If you're Gryffindor you're expected to be all balls-to-the-wall no-bullshit alpha jump-through-the-fire kind of a guy. Hufflepuffs don't have to do anything, they can do whatever they want. If I want to be evil, I can be evil, if I want to be a bookworm, I can be a bookworm, if I want to start a dumpster-fire behind the gym I can start a dumpster-fire behind the gym.

That Slytherin and Hufflepuff are objectively best.

>Slytherin
>dirty blonde

Daily Reminder that Ronald Weasley is a Cuck

I'm a pretentious elitist douchebag so probably slytherine.

ravenclaw desu

I went to a private high school and we had to wear that exact slytherin tie 3 days a week

were all the girls rich sluts who hated their daddies?

No, most girls from Tumblr I know know that they're too retarded for Ravenclaw. They belong in Hufflepuff.

>I would then blame the dumpster fire on slytherin, 'cause they always doin' evil shit, and watch them get put on lockdown.

So why exactly was Hermione not put in ravenclaw? She was the smartest student in all of Hogwards.

Hufflepuff is the fucking shit. They were always like "man hufflepuff sucks it's all the rejects from the other houses" but they were about making your way in the world without needing to identify with a personality trait. It's not the smart house, or the brave house, or the cunning house. It's the one that's just a house. Fuck your tumblr personality test result house. I rep yellow till i fucking die cuz they don't sit around jerking off to how great they are.

Rowling was a hack, in early drafts Harry was in a group of four, each from a different house

Something something friends
Something something was already smart

>Hufflepuff probably has the best food, the most chill atmosphere, most likely to do some nice relaxing druggy potions, most likely to attract thick mullato girls with curly hair

Hufflepuff for life, go get fucked up in some dumb wizard tournament for good boy points lol

I mean, everyone mocked Hufflepuff nonstop in the early books. Ron hated the idea of being put in Hufflepuff only slightly less than Slytherin, and everyone called Neville a Hufflepuff to put him down.

Terrible writing since its a children series and for some adults that never grow up like

Her eyes look warmest.

I mean the qualities required for a hogwarts house are dumb anyway, Brave, Smart, Evil and Loyal(?). Can people not be brave and smart at the same time? Or brave and evil?

Pretty sure Rowling just wanted a house for the protagonist, a house of bad guys and then needed 2 other houses to fill space.

Hufflepuff for life.

is harry potter a beta?

based pastaposter

hufflepuff is the special ed section of Hogwarts. Its for retards, fatties and losers only

>Implying I even read the books
>Implying I even read
Look at this fucking "I retook the online quiz until I got Ravenclaw" faggot LOL

you mean harry

>sperging out on an asian and then taking a ginger sloppy seconds
yes, he was

D E A N E D
E
A
N
E
D

This

The best example of the shit writing in this series is how Slytherian is just generic tier evil.

According to few test I've taken it is Ravenclaw.

Feels good.

I don't think you know what bad writing means.

Have you watched the Goblet of Fire? He's as beta as it gets, it's like looking in the mirror; I was amazed how Rowling nailed school social awkwardness.

>hair colors change by what house she's in
Racist.

Also, Ravenclaw is best house.

Unf, Cho Chang. Seriously, best house.

Damn right.

Am I the only one who thought she was really ugly? They could've casted a better asian girl.

what sexual fetish would you to fulfill first if you were a wizard?

USING POLYJUICE POTION WITH YOUR PARTNER

Rape

>Gatsby
>Atlas Shrugged
>Les Miserables
Not even worth checking out the rest of this trash list. The only things that should be at the top are Silver Age comic books.

i always imagined the invisibility cloak would be GOAT

Back to your enclosure Shamu

she's cute in an asian way. honestly a childhood fap right there. i ran out of yellow fever after freshman year tho.

Ravenclaw to be with my wife Luna.

How do people still respond to that copy pasta?

Because she wanted to be in gryffindor.
Which makes the family house traditions a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy, to be honest.

Nah she was definitely attractive, though personally im not into asians. her character was fucking dreadful and pointless though. basically a non character.

similar sort of thing happened with Ginny. which still amazes me how little effort they actually put in for the protagonists romance.

These

Use my wand as a splint on my dick so I can fake being hard

not an argument

same thing with harry. The sorting hat tried to put him in slytherin first thing

The only thing I don't know is what you mean by this.

The sorting of Slytherian house students effectively maps out who's going to be a psychopath or criminal. This is because the sorting hat is imbued with the combined personality of the house members and anyone willing to support wizardly genocide or subjugation of muggles is going to sing to Salazaar's personality and thus send them off to Slytherian where fellow students with the same ideas would only influence and reinforce their beliefs.

The moment Salazaar defected and the myth of the chamber of secrets started to spread the other founders should have basically disbanded his house and purged his personality from the sorting hat.

Instead they kept the house around to constantly accumulate assholes begging for a dark lord to show up and start their race war.

fucking pleb

hufflepuff is fat clumsy retards, right? gotta go with that.

Hufflepuff is the best house and anyone not recognizing that is either retarded or edgy as fuck.

/r/smug hufflepuff pepe

fat retard confirmed. also most likely a faggot

They're also the most bitchy, fickle and clique ridden house.

i'm in Slytherin on Pottermeme

also very much a traditionalist (hate gay marriage and race-mixing)

probably slytherin

how is that in any way appealing?

Better than being surrounded by pretentious assholes and Chads

so you wouldnt fuck an asian girl?

wtf i love ravenclaw now

are you having a difficult time conceptualizing that a user of this site is a fat clumsy retard who also has at least a little self awareness

Why do you hate gay marriage and race-mixing?

Except not every member of Slytherin went evil. they may be more cunning or just shitty people but not all are evil. and some are even decent people.

add to the fact that there are other students who were horrible people and some even went on to become evil despite not being in slytherin also Tom Riddle would have gone on to become Voldemort regardless of which house he was sorted into because he was fucked in the head. the house has nothing to with that, if anything it helps organize the students so you know which ones to keep an eye on.

am i tripping or is ravenclaw the only one smiling a little? also ravenclaw or hufflepuff

Rowling isn't a very effective details oriented writer, she's very solid at general world building. She needed someone to reign in a lot of her stupid ideas. Someone like Slytherin should have been purged Stalin style, and a dispersion of the slytherins would have effectively castrated any sort of racial pride. Yes, parents could raise their kids to be prideful in their family lines, but mommy and daddy aren't there to stop Sam Slytherin from fingering mudblood Helen Hufflepuff Rottencrotch. Which ironically enough, would end up lining with JK Rowling's "no more borders reeee trump" shit.

Which means she doesn't actually give a fuck about the issues, she just wants to look like she cares to sell more money.

Hufflepuff. Think of all the qt's with self esteem issues for being in the shithouse that are prime for a good dickin'.

Hufflepuff.

Sounds like chilly place full of friendly people. Slytherin is everyone for himself, Ravenclaw highly competitive. Gryffindor is cool tho.

Ravenclaw is best house
Followed by Hufflepuff

slytherin

I'd be the Seeker and captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team :^)

almost reported this thread because I thought it was a BLACKED.COM ad

I see it, think it's the passive eyebrows

Pottermore says I'm in Ravenclaw

Not intelligent, just autistic

Has it ever shown anyone unsatisfied with the house they were chosen for? Seems like everyone was all nervous about it but then when it happened everyone got the house they wanted anyway.

Also Dumbledore's nephew, Sirius Black's son, Grindelwald's grandchild, and Voldemort's brother :^)

That would actually be a good scenario to better flesh out the individual houses based on each character's personality but I wouldn't have expected Rowling to be able to pull it off.

Slytherin is full of people who will achieve shit though.
You are hufflepuff.
Just posting here makes anyone hufflepuff.

You should anyways. This board is for adults