Well user, doesn't feel so funny anymore does it?

Well user, doesn't feel so funny anymore does it?

I've borked a lot of women in my days

no complaints here, hilarious movie.

Ten years of wizard powers

no complaints here, hilarious movie.

still 29

...

gonna kill myself at 29 la

I'm too retarded to even get a job

Yeah it does, that's what makes it so great

you can buy a house for $100 in detroit
move there and elance

I'm Australian

Become a monk.

>I'm too retarded to even get a job
Do you know how stupid the average person is? If you're capable of spelling a 3-syllable word like "retarded", you're capable of showing up on time, and you're capable of not stealing from employers, you're already ahead of millions of people in the job market.

it's legal to move to america illegally

>Widescreen presentation
Widescreen is such cancer I wish pan and scan would make a comeback already that actually focuses only on what matters instead of just fojewmko jiyur eyes ij wht information.

>look at image
>What's so hard about it?
>look closer at guys who are her options
>their facial expressions
>yeah, i sympathize with her

Unrealistic movies general?

where in Aus do you live faggot?
there are so many entry level jobs or apprenticeships in construction right now on the east coast it's insane. man up.

I dropped out of high school due to massive amounts of social anxiety and depression

My brain can't function around other people.

I also am unironically probably autistic

He also can't masturbate so yeah it's pretty unrealistic cause if I were Josh Hartnett I' dbe beateiog n off everytdatye uejofiver where my career olis going .

That's okay, most of us here are autistic too

I've had sex plenty of times but it's been like 7 years since I fucked someone who isn't a prostitute. sad desu

Did you have a stroke mid way through your comment?

yo bro

Ah, got it. Well, you do ok interacting with people online, it seems. Perhaps you can figure out how to make money online. I figure that there will be more and more opportunities to do so as time goes on. Me, I'm a software developer and I've managed to find a pretty sweet job in which I can work from home about 99% of the time.

yo

No i just refute to look back on anyr mistakes I makein lfeij.

6 more years to go, bros. im almost there.

24 but more than likely gonna lose it a few weeks the way things are going. The anxiety this has caused me almost makes me regret trying to become a normie.

Who cares. If you're not a welfare babby, you'll likely move away from home for a job at some point, then you can just lie to everyone about it.

Seek medical help

The movie where the man gets rapped and the women still blame him.

>la
Are you from Singapore?

No you're not, moron

I was in my 20s when this movie came out. 40 is now fast approaching and I'm still a virgin. Strangely I'm not too worried about it, just going to keep doing my thing and whatever happens happens. At least I have a lot of money saved up.

Ya la chibai. How you know ah?

I'm not going to have sex ever

You're not going to have a choice, fish

Could have been laid a dozen times over, but every single time I turned them down.

Get on my level.

I'm about 13 months away from being a 30 year old virgin. I'll probably just fuck some well reviewed escort between now and then.

>used to spend every birthday wish on getting laid
>gave up like 8 years ago

why is everybody so old on this board lmao

Fuck two well reviewed escorts at once you rich motherfucker.

Kids don't watch movies, they play video games and hang out on kik

>get on my level

Could have been laid a dozen times over, but every single time I couldnt get it up

no it's pretty funny

>How you know

Jesus you really are retarded.

shut the fuck up faggot

when i shat my pants at school i grabbed my trousers in the air taking them back to class so i can backpack it, while everyone was still in there

Don't let those wagecucks get you down bro. They're just jealous of your freedom.

26 and only done stuff with escorts. Would be completely everyhingless with girls otherwise, not even had a date or attention.

Not if you're white.

taxi driver here dont give up

Its just like the classic movie!

Just fucking get an escort you pathetic pussy

Meh, I never thought it was funny. Even when it first came out and I was in middle school I worried this would be me. Damn, I was way too good at predicting my future.

I lost mine at 25. I started attracting women when I stopped giving a shit and started acting like an ass.

>illegal
>don't even know how and would probably get arrested for being a virgin

Why wait? Just kill yourself now.

How is it with escorts?

>have sex
>can't cum
>have sex again
>can't cum
>have sex again
>can't cum
>have sex AGAIN
>can't cum
>have sex again
>pretend to cum so I don't hurt her feelings
>have sex again
>can't cum

5 different girls and I still can't cum. What is wrong with me

Explains it

you can't cum lmao

you drunk the jew water

you a big fan of death grips?

>dude just don't have a mental illness bro and get a job lmao
fuck off wagie scum

It varies. If you live in a country where it's legal and you look online for ones with many good reviews then you will get a good experience.

I have the opposite problem.
>have s-cum
>hav-cum
>cum then have se-cum

The weirdest thing is they all left me because we were having less sex because I was drinking too much.

>being this retarded

Google your city + "escorts" and you will find a craigslist/backpage dumbass.

Great, that should be enough for a diagnosis!

>call escort
>forget to do prefap cumsies
>she arrives
>8 minute toothy blowjob
>benis in vagina
>cum in 15 seconds
>"that'll be $200 plus tip"

Seek help for those digits.

>that quote on the back
>not attributed to anybody
Lel

You idiot. Just fuck her the day after you get your powers. Best of both worlds brah

Why, were they ugly? Were they assholes? Were they men/women (depending on your orienration)?

no u

It really doesn't matter that much m8
You can't hurry love
No you'll just have to w8

Are you on SSRI's by any chance? Because I couldn't cum when I was with the rare woman I tricked into sleeping with me and I was worried I was gay, but then my life started turning good and I stopped taking them and I haven't had a problem since in that regard. If not SSRI's then you're probably a porn/masturbation addict and your body has been trained to cum in a very specific, solitary way and it's now hard to do with another person present

Hey, I was never laughing. I wanted him to get laid. I want to get laid

it's a game of w8 and b8

>be 22 like me
>still haven't borked women
20s is still gonna be alright, right /r9ktv/?

Who /stillwatingfortheirfairytaleprincess/ here?
Stay pure virginbros.

Nah. I just have this retarded, old school notion of relationships, and I feel it's worthless to fuck for the mere sport of it. It loses its meaning and detracts from the feeling of having sex with someone you actually care about. And I can nut whenever I want - it's cheaper and less hassle than dealing with women.

I'd be lying though if I said I didn't regret a few of them. Instinctively, I do want to fuck everything that moves, and some of them would probably have been a pretty good lay. The ones I regret were not the prettiest of the bunch, either.

He's just drunk, relax

That's a strange way of rationalizing being afraid of losing your virginity

I'm not a pathetic retard who pushing 30 and suicidal because I can't get a job, so I'm good. Go right ahead though.

maybe you're gay and you just don't know it

Don't even have internet friends, not sure how you expect me to meet up with a girl.

You can think what you want.

Here's a notion. Try caring about someone and have sex with them.

Joke's on you, I'm only a 32 year old virgin and my life is in far worse shape than his.

Thanks, Dr. Phil.

this

What companies? I'm interested, live in Gold Coast

Here's your (You).

No, I completely understand. I would never fuck someone I wasn't in love with either.

>It loses its meaning and detracts from the feeling of having sex with someone you actually care about.

How would you know if you're a virgin?

How frequently do you masturbate and how tight is your grip?

I think the producers realized this and put the "Lol I can do that. Yeah but you masturbate" Line in the commercials for it.

Seems raunchy

why is it still called "losing" your virginity while retaining is the form of the action that is frowned upon?
it should be something like "gaining your socially acceptable status against peer pressure" at this point

I've had and can get pussy, I just have no interest in perpetually jumping through flaming hoops for it when I have access to limitless amounts of pornography.