Opinions are like assholes

Neil Patrick Harris wants to fuck them

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No norm thread will die with no replies while I still draw breath. Stay tuned for new NML this monday!

No more dry meat

Is the mangrate a male inhancement pill?

this is one of my favourite jokes and i always pull it out when im drunk and talking to some slut

just replace the punchline with " likes to get fucked in it"

This monday? You fucking with us?

CHICKEN

Why this... is a knick-knack, Paddy Wack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone!

hes a holocaust denier

they always mention STALIN

the maddest of them all

Hold the fort... This guy hated Jews!

It wasn't Ben Matlock. Didn't even look like him. Not a day goes by I don't think about that old man and how much I hate his fucking guts.

Anyone know that weird phil joke or something. He saved up something for marriage? every time I get to the joke, I can't understand Norm, must be me.

This isn't clever though.

No one wants to fuck an opinion. That doesn't even make sense.

Well, I think I'm serving a youthful porpoise.

New NML will only arrive when every fan believes. Or he gambles away his netflix money.

...

ARE YOU SERIOUS?

youtube.com/watch?v=PMt7C3COiVM

With Norms comedy most people hate your comedy because it's unconventional and a few people think you're the funniest guy in the room

wtf i hate comedy now

Is Norm gay? He makes so many gay jokes. He isn't even homophobic.

Damn, I believe now

you know what they say... behind every joke there's a guy in an alley sucking your cock

I'm old enough to remember back to simpler times, when the worst thing that you would hear on the news was :Hijacked jetliners flying into buildings

his book is a worse version of his normal comedy

The audio book.

Yeah, he's already confirmed that he's a deeply closeted gay man.

that's what the ladies say to mr. furley

>Does your insatiable hunger for Nazi shit know no bounds?

The Gilbert episode is GOAT

Olive Oyl, remember how skinny and ugly she was and everyone was trying to fuck her?

Cast irun grilling

She was a leper

Call me an old softly but I'd prefer you call me a distinguished gentleman with flagging erection

and how big ethel would always chase jughead

>I believe that they were sold to the sordid world of underground river sex trafficking

Nooo. Leave Jughead out of this.

I mean this guy was a real JERK

Why would Neil Patrick Harris fuck an opinion?

Why did the idiot throw his clock out the window?

Norm please do the fucking podcast.

CHICKEN

I had a friend who would have sex with a different woman every night. It was unbelievable. Every single night. So I asked him what his secret was. Turns out he was a serial rapist

>I remember when the Harlem shake was a black fella hanging me over a fire escape trying to collect his money
>[Shaking Motions]
>[Adam Laughing

I was talking to Patton Oswault about Cosby. He said the worst thing about the whole thing was the hypocrisy. I didn't agree. I thought it was the raping. It's like yeah Joe, he's a rapist, but at least he ain't a hypocrite about it.

>the state of his head

STEAK

Your dad's still alive, right?

Todd Glass was the worst guest ever.

Agreed but I enjoyed seeing norm make him squirm.

he really was, and they went and wasted two entire episodes on that literal faggot

y he squirm?

Why doesn't norm say who writes the jokes whenever guests ask?

because it wouldn't be funny
obviously it's a group effort, everyone with ideas chips in

Why wasn't Papa Norm ever super famous? He always put out quality work but not too much in quantity and none of it was super successful.

men in prison write them

Yeah, he seemed like an actual moron, never understanding that Norm is a fucking comedian and a raunchy one at times. He's going to say some bizarre shit, and YES TODD, they're JOKES.
Well look at his current situation with the podcast. I imagine he has a lot of control over the thing, clearly he signed nothing to actually enforce him making them. So what we're seeing is Norm's work ethic in action, and it's close to zero.
I think he had to "work hard" (maybe a couple hours a week) on finishing the book because he was contractually obligated to. Then he did, went and did the press circuit, probably was "tired", and then went home to go nearly comatose and Tweet about sports.
Everyone in comedy knows Norm and knows he's a genius. His comedy can fly over some heads because he doesn't always pander to the lowest common denominator, and that's not as marketable as someone who will. That and huge gambling issues meant he was likely seen as untrustworthy by the money men.
Short answer: he's lazy.

Ed McBoy

Might not be that hes lazy but that he lacks confidence and doesnt think he has enough material to be funny constantly.

It's difficult coming up with a bad joke for most people, try coming up with tonnes of good jokes. Incredibley difficult.

Oh come on, at this point in his career? That seems like something that maybe he said to himself after being fired from SNL. "If I didn't work there, I'll never work anywhere," or something. Then every single guest he has on make it obvious, some even directly saying it, that he's a living legend who will forever be one of the greats. Norm has been in comedy for so god damn long it is just who he is. Some jokes he recycles (see: that pretty lousy Netflix special) but part of comedy is simple joke retention, and clearly he has it. Regardless of the situation he always has the best response for whatever happens, either off the cuff or it'll remind him of another joke.
I think this podcast is also his best material. I don't think his stand up is very good, there's something about it that makes me feel Norm doesn't like doing it. The podcast is small, comfy, knows everyone in the room, likely already good friends with the guest. He slays it in every single episode and even if he doesn't believe in himself, someone is always there to remind him that he can basically do no wrong.
Yes, comedy is difficult and nobody bombs more than those that make it. But Norm is almost like Seinfeld where it's just natural for him to be funny at this point, he barely has to try.

All of that can be true and Norm can also be insecure and lack confidence at the same time.

Check his imdb page, he's actually working more than I thought. Which actually just kind of complicates these things for me.
Also there is supposed to be at least one, I think maybe two, already taped episodes that just aren't airing. One is Letterman.
If your confidence theory was right I don't see why he'd be holding out already recorded material and why he'd be doing voice work. Like if you were right that would mean he thinks his voice is funny enough to get laughs but his comedy isn't, which makes no sense.
The guy knows he is funny (and not smug about it like Seinfeld). I just think he's old and lazy.

>not a big norm fan at first
>watch every podcast episode
>WHEN THE FUCK ARE THE NEW EPISODES

Norm loves doing stand-up, so your theory isn't sound. The work ethic criticism also doesn't make sense because he's said on multiple occasions that he rarely takes a day off when it comes to stand-up, he's 100% committed to the craft. The issues that Norm has is his lack of ego, you can tell that he has a real disdain for people who treat comedy purely as a gateway to film and television, he sees it as a form of corruption. The majority of the work Norm does is either stuff that his friends put him in out of respect, or low effort stuff to get a pay check and continue to fund his stand up and gambling addictions.

youtube.com/watch?v=QS18dSe3Zz8

Is she /ourgirl/?

I guess you're right, not a lot of research later and apparently Norm spends most of his time out doing stand up. Though I stand by it that something seems off about it when compared to the podcast and definitely prefer him relaxed rather than rehearsing.
10 months without another podcast is bizarre though, don't you think? I don't see how his ego comes into that. He seems to have fun seeing old friends and making them and Adam laugh.

why does she need to be sitting in that awkward pose? also way to ruin the joke with her shitty delivery

i didnt laugh and it was told more like a monologue, which it was, from an actress

and it was lame how she tried to defend the joke

but id literally cum in any hole she has

Why do you think? Esquire is trying to sell a sexy woman who is also witty?!? Whoa, gotta watch the others, too! Oh whoa they have these in every issue of Esquire?!? I should buy an online subscription so I can keep seeing attractive women who also have good brains!
I can't believe it actually works on people. If I want a "funny joke" I'll watch a comedian, not a a pretty woman who steals someone else's humor.

The Guinness Book of fucking retards.

>A billion dollars? That's more than my dad made in his lifetime.

Andy Richter, the SWEDISH GERMAN

youtube.com/watch?v=-RakHW5530Q

>Jew asks you if you've ever questioned the holocaust on live JASH

What do????

youtube.com/watch?v=XeJvLRM9Otg

9/11

That gift basket bit was fucking brilliant.

>you're not gay!
>you were raped!
>conan walks off stage

Listen Barfyman8962, no you can not rape my mother with a knife!

literally genius.

Andy said "there's nothing funny about being Swedish German" so he took it as a challenge and crafted an inception rape joke on the spot that used that as a laugh line throughout.

youtube.com/watch?v=TdDeaARsI4Y

Why does Sup Forums like norm? His """jokes""" are just attempts a witty nonsequitors that just end up sounding mean and crass. I mean the guy is a real jerk.

>have you heard of the mangrate?
>yes
>you have?!

>He did that and goes "look what Norm did"

what does his hat mean?

KEK
>9999
respect

youtube.com/watch?v=L7K-kaelQEs

I bet the "Board" is spelled B-o-r-e-d.

>unsheathes katana

S P I T E F U L

Doesn't make sense.

larry king was a great guest

some gold plated chains would make a nice retirement gift for a very very good slave

Because they're like assholes

What a terrible name for an airliner, reminds me of that tragedy

This fucking guy is so insecure about his sexuality that he's mad at me because I jizzed on his face

Hey bro, let's kill this honky bitch!

Oh, I didn't even know he was sick.

Opinions are like assholes

This poster loves to get fucked in them

Wait a minute

Hold the phone

Mine's a Dell. I like Adele.

>when I die I want my body donated to science, but more specifically a scientist who was working on bringing dead guys back to life
>comedian is too stupid to get it

>Gay
>Jew
>Stoned

going for the trifecta of the least funny man alive