So what does the ring do besides make you go crazy and turn invisible?

So what does the ring do besides make you go crazy and turn invisible?

It's for the big bad to use. Not anyone else. It makes the big bad his most powerful. That's what the ring is meant for .

makes you a soul nigger

intensifies your orgasms

Lets you enslave 9 kings and turn them into spooky ghost men.

Anyone else saw ass-to-ass from the thumbnail?

Amplifies natural strengths.

Hobbits, already good at evading danger, go invisible.

Fuck you

ESS TOO ESS

bigger cock

You die after 7 days when you watch the videotape

it's like heroin but instead of killing you it makes you live a really long time

Sauron was too stupid to find the Silmarilli, so he created this cheap trinket

This This This This As well as influencing other lving beings and making them bend to your will, which allows you to gain power. Still - its ultimate purpose when wielded by someone who is NOT the Dark Lord, is simply to get back to its master

it gives you power over the wearers of the lesser rings

makes you really really want it.

Gives you a more powerful, longer-lasting erection

I've read the books more than a decade ago, but isn't it implied that if someone who was wise and strong-willed enough possessed the ring, it would give him immense powers, and use it almost just as well as Sauron?

I think it was what Tolkien said if Gandalf have the ring.

>but isn't it implied that if someone who was wise and strong-willed enough possessed the ring, it would give him immense powers, and use it almost just as well as Sauron?
It's implied that even Gandalf, a fucking space wizard, would try to use it for good but would ultimately be corrupted by it, becoming much like Sauron himself.

Yep that too but like () just mentioned, ultimately he'd be corrupted

(when Frodo offers Gandalf the ring)
>'No!' cried Gandalf, springing to his feet. 'With that power I should have power too great and terrible. And over me the Ring would gain a power still greater and more deadly.'
>His eyes flashed and his face was lit as by a fire within. 'Do not tempt me! For I do not wish to become like the Dark Lord himself...'

Potentially but the ring still has the ability to betray that person. And the ring would still be capable of influencing a powerful and willful individual into causing evil through subtle means.

that is not fucking why you go invisible

What was the One Ring's tax policy?

why didnt sauronman just make another ring

You can wear it on your penis

Progressive, most likely.

95% on the lords of coin.

Don't take the ring, Frodo.
Don't take the ring.

>Gandalf as Ring Lord would have been far worse than Sauron. He would have remained `righteous', but `self-righteous'. He would have continued to rule and order things for `good', and the benefit of his subjects according to his wisdom (which was and would have remained great).
I assume it would be a prosperous but heavy handed police state kind of kingdom

Yes. It would be an actual, total dystopia.

That's why there are no tax policies described in LotR: Tolkein was an an-cap and believed in voluntarily giving to the state. Involuntary taxes are an evil and were abolished by Aragorn after the war ended.

its like a metaphor for tyranny, or power in general. No matter who it is, it is fundamentally corrupting.

Power doesn't corrupt in itself, corrupt people abuse power when they have it

thats a cute way to view the world. Ever seen The Wire? Because that might have been dramaticized but it was based on shit that actually happens all the time, good people are forced to do bad things or they'll find themselves no longer in those positions. If you dont make yourself fit the bill, then someone else will. The job changes the person, the person rarely changes the job.

Say that to Obama, the peace-candidate who bombed more of the middle-east than several of his predecessors combined.

Same Obama who campaigned on compassion to immigrants before deporting over a million of them.

Either he was a duplicitous asshole, or a guy who thought he could do no wrong with too much power.

It's original purpose was to rule over all the other rings of power that Sauron helped make. That way the wearers of the rings would be enslaved to Sauron.

It's secondary, unintended function, is it's ability to amplify the natural strength of it's wearer. A hobbit like Frodo would not gain much from wearing it but an already powerful being like Gandalf would become almost invincible. Sauron did not think this would happen when he made the ring. It was a happy accident since the ring amplified even his powers despite the fact he had sacrificed a great portion of it to make the ring.

Kek

That kingdude who cut Sauron's finger off went poof too

basically 99999 for luck stat

and he was a giant superhuman warrior king so if was going to amplify anything it would have been his strength.

This is a reference to Requiem, right? Or is there some other ESS2ESS I'm not aware of?

and you didn't see him for the rest of the movie

>Gandalf would become almost invincible
Nope. Gendalf is not very strong, adding part of Sauron power wouldn't even made him the strongest Maiar.

>Gandalf would become almost invincible (in Middle Earth)
is what I meant.

>tfw nothing would happen if I wore it because I have no strengths

Thumbnail looks like a golden veiny doubleheaded dildo being inside two assholes.
probably just me tho [\spoiler]

Don't say that
>All seems nice and peaceful on Sup Forums
>Suddenly the entire website is overrun with shitposting
>This shitposting is so abhorrent that even the most contrarian assholes are repulsed by its horrors
>Mods don't know what's going on, and Hiroshimoot is panicking
>Turns out some user on Sup Forums found The One Ring, and used it to compliment his greatest strength
>Sup Forums was deleted the next day

What if Aragorn used the ring? I really like thinking about this kinda stuff

Gandalf said the ring would've made him more powerful

Makes Jews greedier.

what if superman used the ring

but sam already got the ring and gave it up

...

Elf woman tells you at the start of the film. Pay attention.

does it makes aragorns tax policy even more inexistent?

My mind went to butt stuff too

Yes, but it would also turn him a slave of Sauron.

What would happen if a Jew put on the ring?


What about a white person?

>Ever seen The Wire?
Stopped reading and opinion discarded.

Wow a shittier anti-life equation. "clap,clap,clap"

I don't think it's that far of a stretch assuming Gandalf would get corrupted since saruman the white got corrupted

Why didn't Gandalf just go get the fires of Mt. Doom before all hell broke loose and bring them to the shire to melt the ring, instead of the other way around?

He could've, say, ridden the eagles into Mt. Doom, even.

Who is the master and who is the slave?
The ring or sauron?

It rules them all or something

The idea is that the ring is the literal will of Sauron and anyone who seeks to use it will become corrupted. The more powerful someone is, the more the ring can influence them. Hobbits make great ring bearers because they're all really simple, so they are better able to resist the draw of the ring.

Saruman was corrupted simply by learning that the ring exists.

could an ogre wear the ring? could my cock? Is the ring one size fits all?

it literally shows the ring shrinking in the first 3 minutes of the movie

the ring is literally a Horcrux, it doesn't matter who tries to use it Sauron's soul is inside of it and will inevitably sooner or later corrupt them

the only reason it took so long to corrupt Bilbo is because of his lazy as fuck introverted nature, which many other Hobbits also share

when you actually give it some thought the species most resistant to the ring's influence were only resistant because they were lazy fucks

i just assumed that was directorial flourish, so even an ant could wear the one ring? If I use a microscope to attach it to a water bear, I could make the ring so microscopic that even Sauron can't handle it

Should have put it up his arse.

I TOLD YOU FAGS
>thats not the ring of power
>Tom Bombadil secretly palmed the real ring and gave the hobbits back a lame Ring of Invisibility +1
>Bombadill used the real ring to GTFO of his space and time
>some say he's still out there, somewhere, still fukcing that whore Blueberry or w/e the fuck

the ring is basically sauron in ring form

>nonexistent

bookfags, how long did Isildur actually last before he died, the movies made it seem like he got killed on his way back home from the war

>Hobbit decency and innocent simple-mindedness is laziness
Tolkien just turned over in his grave.

Who is actually the strongest Maiar?

>bilbo
>lazy

read the hobbit.

if they had any real desires then the ring would have corrupted the shit out of them, but all they ever want to do is eat and read by the hearth

yea he was bitching and moaning up until the end of the journey where he realized he had a good time after all

hobbits by nature are not an adventurous lot

Why did the Black Riders stab Frodo and then run away?
Why were they terrified of Glorfindel?

He did.

didn't they get lit on fire before they ever had a real chance to fight back?

I don't much remember frodo, but in the books the ring makes sam want to turn the entire world into a shire-like garden. Then he realizes that that's the ring, not him, because hobbits aren't crazy like that.

Literally nothing else.

It amplifies your hubris and lends you enough of Sauron's power on Arda to hang yourself with it.
Its a really simple plot device.

I'm assuming you mean Sauron and not Saruman. Sauron could not make another ring because most of his power was embedded in all of the rings with the vast majority of it in the one ring. I think Sauron was also made non-corporeal once he was slain by Isuldur (? can't remember the elf's name who killed Sauron.)

As for Saruman, he is but a mere man, utterly incapable of creating such a powerful item.

Gandalf.

This makes me ask myself again: What is it that makes Americans to special, enormous and dumb sub humans?
Like Cockroaches resist death they resist eduction.

Frodo should have eaten the ring and then pooped it out. That Saruon would have to touch Frodo's poop if he wanted the ring lol.

The rings given to the dwarf lords made them incredibly greedy.

Who cares?
Shit series.
Star Wars is better.

I feel like Sauron wouldn't have a problem with this

That's some serious edge

I thought they saw through the bullshit and hid them

in fact wasn't it a major plot point that only the 9 mortal men succumbed to them?

Makes you the big bad Norman imperial usurper that Saxons like Tolkien despise.

Not of the dwarves, though, if I remember correctly. The rings given to the dwarven kings did not enable Sauron to control them. All the dwarven rings did was make the wearer have an insatiable greed for more gold and money.

what if you gave the ring to a britbong? Would he import muslims faster?

hello gloriously inevitable contrarian Wire post, it took you a while.

>when you don't have the ring on, you are visible but Sauron can't see you
>when you have the ring on, you are invisible, but Sauron can see you

woah, that's amazing you guys.

Americans and their wifes would get B L A C K E D 50 times faster.

thats super deep bruh i bet you'd get a bunch of upvotes on reddit.