King Alfred I'm Bebbanburg

King Alfred I'm Bebbanburg

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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ninjatō
youtu.be/ZMWW31FVCy0?t=1m4s
twitter.com/AnonBabble

Season 3 is going to be GOAT

Hopefully we'll see more qt Aethelfled getting the norse BWC

Literally the worst character on his own show.

>raised by vikings as a slave/favorite pet of the viking king and still acts like a spoiled prince that needs his tendies
>No sense of respect or loyalty to any britton because "muh viking culture"
>Still wants to be a britton king and claim his birthright despite that
>pump and dumps all QT waifus that come his way
>constantly chimping out at anyone that expects anything from him
>Had a blacksmith personally forge him an orc sword so he could feel more unique
Show would be better if he had died and based Leofric was leading the crew. I want this cunt to get the black plague.

>Sword worn on back

But Uhtred isn't nordic, he is a britton LARPing as a norseman.

Too be fair he made that sword so retarded it might not be convenient to carry it on the hip. it looks like he went to the blacksmith and literally just said "UNNNNNGH THICKERRRRR" until he finally handed him a short fat piece of shit with a goddamn glass pommel.

Destinizzzawww

Who keeps rubbing sheep shit on the characters faces?

Same crap in the vikings, who was the historian that vetted this retarded trope

user, these shows take place before the Moors came from Africa and taught all these filthy Europeans how to bathe. they also taught them math and farming techniques. stay woke.

I agree that the show seriously misses Leofric

Dane?

I dont want his wife and kid to die but i really feel like his wife and kid are gonna die

I haven't watched season 2 yet, is Uhtred a gud viking boi who dindu nuffin or has he actually learned some semblance of respect after Leofrics death?

If you're so knowledgable, why don't you tell me how often vikings bathed, because from the sources I can find, it wouldn't be too unusual if the guy has a bit of dirt and grime on his face:

I'd argue he's an even bigger fuck up in season 2, but it bites him in the ass briefly at least

>Between rowing boats and decapitating enemies, Viking men must have stunk to high Valhalla, right? Quite the opposite. Excavations of Viking sites have turned up tweezers, razors, combs and ear cleaners made from animal bones and antlers. Vikings also bathed at least once a week—much more frequently than other Europeans of their day—and enjoyed dips in natural hot springs.

Literally the first result when googling "viking hygene" try to learn how computers work, grandpa.

Is it worth watching only seen the first few episodes but hat was years ago

>Abandons his first wife and child to a life of poverty and debt so he can go raid a village allied with the king he is currently serving
>Willing to kill his only friend instead of owning up to his crimes and is only stopped by a random event
>Later sacrifices his child to a witch and leaves his wife for said witch that killed his baby.
How does he fuck up MORE than that?

i watched the pilot and all the viking characters are homo, should i continue? They made Ubbe a massive faggot

Stop using "grandpa" as an insult, you're implying these faggots could not only get laid but also sustain a job/ career enough to put out non-retarded kids who also get jobs and kids; on Sup Forums? Fuck out of here

It's better than current Vikings so if you watched that then you'll probably enjoy it

he trusts a random thrall that is prophesized to be the new king of northern England, who sells him out for his uncle's support into slavery, and gets another companion killed. That's within the first couple episodes.

DESTINY

The not bathing stereotype of Medieval Europeans is more of a Christian feature but even then it is overblown. People regularly bathed in the Dark Ages especially those places which were colonised by Rome and introduced their bathing culture and built baths.

>Gets proven wrong almost instantly
>Makes an entire post being flustered because he was called "grandpa" on a lebanese cooking forum
Did you forget to take your pills today, Grandpa?

Season 1 Vikings was so good :((((

*Anglo-saxon

And i wasn't talking about Uthred, Aethelqt got NORDED by that one viking warlord whose name i forgot already

What show is dis?

The Last Kingdom

>The Last Kingdom
>animal kingdom
>kingdom


they arent very creative with names nowadays

>generic RPG protagonist #891
Hild is a qt though

ye but if the content is good then who gives a fuck about the name you know

agreed that's 3 show i'm enjoying

>it’s an uhtred seduces and fucks another sweet Briton girl episode

Oh wait, that’s every episode. I love this show, absolutely tops.

it is physically impossible to draw a sword from the back. they will never ever show it happening in a clear shot. no one ever did it in reality

that sword is a fucking travesty, if they care enough to give him a sax then why the fuck is his sword so shit?

Why the FUCK hasn't he got his ancestral seat/fort back yet? He has curried massive amounts of favour with the king, surely by now he should have it back.

they do this everytime in ninjas movies

it's in Northumberland so presumably deep in Dane territory, the Anglo-Saxons didn't reach Northumberland until Aethelred's time.

Well those are really short swords, with a longer sword your arm cant stretch enough to clear the scabbard.

Unless you use one of those open backed meme scabards.

These scabbards really trigger me

>gotta protect your sword from the elements when it's not in use
>hey how about I get rid of 60 - 70% of the cover the scabbard grants and put it on my fucking back where it's vulnerable to everything

Some scabbards aren't fully enclosed so the blade can just slip out sideways, and they can move on the strap so you'd tip it vertical and draw downwards from your shoulder. Usually with greatswords they just pulled the scabbard off and left it in camp since they are actually a hindrance in combat.

>short

katanas are thin not short and probably longer than most one handed swords (70cm)

He kills ubba
Ivar dies
Alfred gets kicked out
His becomes a nun
His kid dies
He kills svein
His Briton waifu gets killed
He fights against the Danes with Alfred and takes back Wessex
I think that's everything

Read the book fags

But those are not katanas are they...

ninjas use katanas last time i checked
not a weeb but whatever it's a sword and they draw it from their back

so it's possible

But they normaly dident.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ninjatō

I'm am Utred, son of Utred, son of Utred, son of Utred, Son of Utred's dog, Son of Utred. You get you idea.

like ninjas movies were known for their accruacy

The costumes in this show make me want to fucking puke, they're so terrible

Better then the costumes on Vikings

BABABINGA?

Anglos are such cucks

>family is murdered and massacred by Danes
>this kid is taken as a slave
>falls in love with Danes
>wants to be one despite them murdering his father

The books are awful though

If you watch you show you would soon realise that the Danes are even bigger cucks than the Saxons

UTHRIC SON OF UTHRIC

> everything is grey or brown shitfilter.
> medieval peasantry were actually very well acquainted with the idea of dyes and paints.

Bebbanburg son of Bebbanburg

giv warriornun gf

retard
youtu.be/ZMWW31FVCy0?t=1m4s

lol

based giv poster

Isn‘t his name Æthœwæoūfrick or some shit and he only becomes Uhtred, son of Uhtred, after Uhtred, son of Uhtred, gets killed and Uhtred, son of presumably Uhtred, renames him Uhtred, son of Uhtred?

>tfw still waiting for Bannerlord

>everyone wears drab colors

I think you might be the retard. Notice how the end 1/3rd of the sword just phases through the top of the sheath.

And he renames his son Uhtred, son of Uhtred after his son Uhtred, son of Uhtred decides to become a priest and angers Uhtred, son of Uhtred.

>Literally the worst character on his own show.

He tends to grow on you like a bad rash with each episode though.

This.

It's based on a series of books called the Saxon Stories by the author who wrote the Sharpe series, The Last Kingdom is just a name of one of the books.