Explain

Dylan White
Dylan White

travelled hundreds of miles across middle earth surviving on nothing but rations of elf bread
still fat
explain

Austin Hill
Austin Hill

it was a movie, not real

Jonathan Barnes
Jonathan Barnes

he had buddy stew with taters

Evan Adams
Evan Adams

Hundred of miles is not that, much elf bread is enough for a few days.

Eli Walker
Eli Walker

He fed on Frodo's cum and poop logs too. You'd know that if you read the books.

Jack Hernandez
Jack Hernandez

Like the majority of overweight people, he probably just had some type of glandular issue or genetics that contribute to him being overweight.

Lincoln Carter
Lincoln Carter

bread makes you fat

Eli Butler
Eli Butler

He was always stuffing his face when Frodo wasn't looking, it was a huge plot point when Gollum caught him. Pay more attention.
Next you're going to tell me you don't know Elessar's tax policy.

Jack Ward
Jack Ward

when you are starving your body breaks down muscle first and then fat

Dylan Collins
Dylan Collins

amazing bait not gonna lie.

Noah Perez
Noah Perez

He forgot to skip the elf's bread

Jayden Myers
Jayden Myers

thanks, was hoping for more (You)s by now though

Adam Cruz
Adam Cruz

could he have asked gandalf to cast a spell to make him thin as a quest reward?

Jordan Harris
Jordan Harris

Why didn't the eagles fly them to Mount Doom?

Joshua Barnes
Joshua Barnes

Why didn't they fly the eagles to Mount Doom?

Eli Gonzalez
Eli Gonzalez

gandalf wasn't a magician

Isaac Mitchell
Isaac Mitchell

fuck you, all the fat people I know have amazing calfs to carry their own weight over the years, which is why he could picked up Frodo, the ring and hiked up Mt Doom

Eli Adams
Eli Adams

BECAUSE THE FLIGHT PLAN HE FILED WITH THE EAGLES LISTS ME, FRODO, SAMWISE HERE BUT ONLY ONE OF YOU. FIRST ONE TO RESIST THE RING GETS TO STAY ON MY EAGLE

Grayson Mitchell
Grayson Mitchell

the eagles would've taken the ring form themselves and be like a super powerful bird demon or some shit to terrorize the realm

Ethan Ortiz
Ethan Ortiz

this, and also the aforementioned glandular issue.

Juan Cook
Juan Cook

They didn't feel like it. Gandalf knew what they were like so he didn't even bother.

Parker Reed
Parker Reed

go back 2 reddit

Easton Smith
Easton Smith

gandalf is a fire wizard, he could've help him burnsome of the fat

Ayden Turner
Ayden Turner

Why didn't Feanor just tell Morgoth to fuck off?

Matthew Young
Matthew Young

He did. He even slammed his door in Morgoth's face.

Brody Ortiz
Brody Ortiz

would have been worth seeing

Nicholas Torres
Nicholas Torres

I've heard quibbles about his policy, what are they? Asking for a friend.

Liam White
Liam White

pfft he's a charlatan. in the whole story the only spells he manages to cast are Hold Portal and Make Magic Fire

Logan Rivera
Logan Rivera

I think they explaind that lembas is really nutritious and they had a fuckton of it. Also soup made of potatoes.

Evan Garcia
Evan Garcia

lived in the wilderness for half a year and traveled hundreds of miles on foot
still fat

Explain.

Ethan Rodriguez
Ethan Rodriguez

hypothyroidism isn't real

Open a book every once in a while.

Adrian Robinson
Adrian Robinson

Someone post the Feanor pasta

Carson Long
Carson Long

t. fatty

Jose Adams
Jose Adams

Flat tax for men. Low taxes for (((elves)))

Nolan Hughes
Nolan Hughes

He had second breakfast and late lunch.

Jaxon Gutierrez
Jaxon Gutierrez

they stole lots of snacks

Nolan Rodriguez
Nolan Rodriguez

that makes you skinny, I have it

Elijah Torres
Elijah Torres

you have HYPERthyroidism then

Levi Hall
Levi Hall

which is just as bad because you'll never be able to get any gains in the gym, no matter how much you eat or lift

t. your local 110lb 5'3 manlet :(

Logan Anderson
Logan Anderson

you mean the minority of fat people, right?

Lucas Ramirez
Lucas Ramirez

Reminder Tolkien was super liberal

Zachary Martinez
Zachary Martinez

They were body on an away game against the 49ers.

Nathaniel White
Nathaniel White

diverse lotr remakes when?

David Cruz
David Cruz

what are the lotr movies for 50 alex

Jacob Gonzalez
Jacob Gonzalez

BREAD MAKES YOU FAT!?!?

Connor Myers
Connor Myers

no way one of those giant eagles could've fit that ring on their talons

Dominic Phillips
Dominic Phillips

Have you seen Sauron's sausage fingers?

And he wore that ring OVER HIS ARMOR, ON THE OUTSIDE OF HIS GAUNTLET

The real shocking part is that somehow it stayed on Frodo's finger without being held in place

Samuel Martin
Samuel Martin

PO
TAY
TOES

John Nelson
John Nelson

BOIL

Thomas Green
Thomas Green

buddy
go away dumb phoneposter

Benjamin Collins
Benjamin Collins

The Ring always fits the bearer, silly

Robert Martinez
Robert Martinez

Because the Nazgul would've crashed the eagles
with no survivors

Michael Kelly
Michael Kelly

muh hormone issues are so severe they violate the laws of thermodynamics

count your calories, fattie

Luke Hernandez
Luke Hernandez

what if the bearer doesn't have fingers?

Ian Cox
Ian Cox

It just needs a limb that's long and uniformly wide enough to put a ring on it.

Angel Allen
Angel Allen

He scored high in Costitution but not in Strenght.

Owen Hernandez
Owen Hernandez

Why didn't they just take the ring across the sea to the Undying Lands so gods more powerful than Sauron could just blow up the ring?

Charles Young
Charles Young

What part of "can only be destroyed from whence it came" do you not understand, nigga?

Carson Allen
Carson Allen

he had big bones

Dominic Taylor
Dominic Taylor

You're telling me gods are less powerful than the fires of Mount Doom?

Is Mount Doom the most powerful entity in the LotR universe?

Hunter Young
Hunter Young

Magic was used to create the ring in the fires of Mount Doom. The fires can destroy it, not because Mount Doom is magic or otherwise special, but because the fire is one of the ring's material components.

Elijah Morgan
Elijah Morgan

they don't want the ring there, the valar are the most incompetent entities in the entire lotr universe, they fuck up at every turn, I don't think they have ever done anything right

if something really has to be fixed eru does it himself, if the ring went to valinor they would find some stupid reason to keep it around and the place would implode

Sebastian Hughes
Sebastian Hughes

One small nibble is supposed to fill your stomach and the Hobbits were taking huge chunks for every meal, the real question is how frodo stayed so thin.

Anthony Reed
Anthony Reed

Next you're going to tell me you don't know Elessar's tax policy.
kek

Anthony Russell
Anthony Russell

Create Flame, Hold Portal.
He casts Light a few times too.

Possibly Prestigidation for firework and smoke effects.

Mason Wilson
Mason Wilson

You're really missing anon's point. Their bait wasn't framed around the idea that such things don't exist.

David Lopez
David Lopez

frodo is a round little shit in the books, he almost had a heart attack crossing the shire to buckland with light baggage

Adrian Kelly
Adrian Kelly

He scored high in Costitution but not in Strenght.
Wisdom too, imo

Ayden Mitchell
Ayden Mitchell

Kek

Isaiah Stewart
Isaiah Stewart

frodo is a round little shit in the books, he almost had a heart attack crossing the shire to buckland with light baggage
The books make the point that he slimmed down a lot in his travels and barely looked hobbit like at all.

The same is said of Bilbo in the hobbit I think.

Jeremiah Stewart
Jeremiah Stewart

That would led to an increase in taxes!

Adrian Diaz
Adrian Diaz

So, OP can't use it then

Gabriel Allen
Gabriel Allen

shurr th LOAD

Connor Cooper
Connor Cooper

Eh, the valar are mostly dumbasses, but Ulmo was a bretty cool guy. Gave Tuor some armor and showed him the way to Gondolin. If it wasn't for that Elrond's dad never would have turned into a star.

Nathaniel Murphy
Nathaniel Murphy

Tale of tales, Tolkien was king.
People disregard the story because "mu celtic mythology, mu language, so we got black and white cheap story"
But he did cook some awesome stuff.

Anthony Scott
Anthony Scott

frodo is a round little shit in the books

He's constantly described as being thinner and taller and fairer than most Hobbits...

Liam Johnson
Liam Johnson

this.

but what the fuck else am i supposed to eat

Camden Smith
Camden Smith

he did actually lose a little weight IIRC

Caleb Hughes
Caleb Hughes

I like based Orome literal viking god more.

Dominic Foster
Dominic Foster

White bread

Jack Powell
Jack Powell

white ppl ruin everything smdh

Jonathan Murphy
Jonathan Murphy

Seeds, nuts, almonds, etc
Non sugary fruit

Josiah Cook
Josiah Cook

carbs, not even once

Charles Gutierrez
Charles Gutierrez

I love this

Caleb Russell
Caleb Russell

I see people complain about losing weight, but shit putting it on when you want it is so much more work. I don't understand how people can get xbox size without making a real effort of it

Cooper Price
Cooper Price

eat more calorie dense food, fried food will make you full in no time but shit like nuts and milk are pretty dense and you can stuff your face no problem

Wyatt Diaz
Wyatt Diaz

actors didn't actually starve themselves
wow hackson

In the book they regularly comment on how much weight they've lost

Evan Ross
Evan Ross

than most hobbits
Hobbits primary activity is eating

Jacob Kelly
Jacob Kelly

This, I weigh 120 pounds and want to put on some weight to get /fit/ but eating more than like 1500 calories a day in healthy foods is a challenge

Asher Ortiz
Asher Ortiz

Eat lots of fat and never exercise

Nathan Sanders
Nathan Sanders

We should shove a power cord up your ass and we'd have infinite energy. It's that simple.

Justin Anderson
Justin Anderson

MAGIC MUST DEFEAT MAGIC

Anthony Reed
Anthony Reed

gods
s
There's only one God in LOTR doofus

Joseph Lewis
Joseph Lewis

order giant pizzas

Daniel Diaz
Daniel Diaz

lotr is based on norse mythology not christian mythology. Eru is the patriarch, the top god, but he's more Zeus than Yahweh, all those guys in the sillmarillion are considered gods or demigods until you get down to beasts and mortals, even wizards are gods. daily reminder that the book never once describes the "maiar" or "valar" as some sort of lesser angel, theyre described like norse gods are, with powers of their own and everything.

Austin Flores
Austin Flores

lotr is based on norse mythology not christian mythology
You're wrong though. Like, actually, demonstrably wrong.
The Lord of the Rings is of course a fundamentally religious and Catholic work; unconsciously so at first, but consciously in the revision.

Jacob Powell
Jacob Powell

genetics of course

Jonathan Perez
Jonathan Perez

LOTR conclusively proves obesity is genetics and no ammount of work and effort can cure it. /fit/fags eternally BTFO.

Jack Taylor
Jack Taylor

I dont see that at all, you'd have to take a microscope and zoom in to the microscopic level to create a point of view so delusional that it selectively forgets every norse influence and only considers christian influence in order to come to such a conclusion. Sure, Eru has a yawheh-like creation story but everything after that is heavily norse: the style and prose read like a norse epic, the world and heaven arent different dimensions but in fact merely separated by actual geography, there are things like Tom that dont fit anywhere in the lore, making you question the reliability of your narrators, not to mention nobody is "religious" in lotr and theres no christian-like worship of Eru on a macro scale, there's individual gods for different aspects of nature and the valar seem to act on their own accord and dont seem like mindless obedient servants like angels do in the bible. You never see an angel in the new testament just chilling out with some elves for a while enjoying the finer things in life and sharing war stories before fucking off back to heaven with whoever wants to come, thats something a norse god would do.

Samuel Rogers
Samuel Rogers

fat
he was bulking faggot
just because you don't have visible abs doesn't mean you don't have functional strength

Evan Gray
Evan Gray

EM
MASH

Samuel Torres
Samuel Torres

Before you came along, we anons were very well thought of.
Indeed?
Never had any memes or did any shitposting.
If you're referring to the incident with Sneed, I was barely involved. All I did was give your board a little nudge.
Whatever you did, you've been officially labeled as a cancer of Sup Forums.

Luke Richardson
Luke Richardson

Good evening little shitposter! What can I do for you? If you're looking for guaranteed replies, we've got some nice cozy faggot-sized threads available, always proud to cater to autistic folk Mr....

Hothead. My name's Hothead.

Brody Foster
Brody Foster

Why didn't the ring fly into Mount Doom

Dylan Wood
Dylan Wood

That's the power of the firendzone

Josiah Wilson
Josiah Wilson

Make 1000 cal shakes

Jordan Sullivan
Jordan Sullivan

The vast majority of hypothyroidism cases only cause a discrepancy of below 10 pounds. 10 pound and over are incredibly rare. Literally 3%~ of hypothyroidism cases.

Lincoln Kelly
Lincoln Kelly

because he has real talent and opinions, as opposed to the rest of the cast who just smoke cigarettes all fucking day. get a clue, normie filth.

Jordan Davis
Jordan Davis

Good

Colton Perry
Colton Perry

I have a friends like you guys. I swear you skellatons have like no appetite. If I didn't work out or run, I would be a skinny fat.

I eat decently healthy too. I'll eat over 1000 cals worth of chicken, beans, rice and veggies for dinner alone, and a glass of wine. I just feel like I'm starving.

I'm not even a giant. I'm only 5:9 165lbs.

For me, trying not to eat too much is a struggle.

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