The Chinks, Peter

>the Chinks, Peter

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>Peter, did I ever tell you about the time I took your Aunt May out for a romantic dinner

>we went to a nice Jewish restaurant, they really do have lovely food

>But I had to seal the exits and fill the place with gas Peter, as you grow you will understand why I did it

>Purify the streets in white, righteous, fire my boy

[Muffled Salil as-sawarim in the distance]

>Remember, Peter. With white power comes white responsibility.

>"Peter... Peter, repeat after me: I am committed to the social, political, and economic liberation of black people."

>Peter, when I was first shipped to Vietnam, my commanding officer told us who the enemy was. They weren't humans, they were gooks, slopes, VC, subhumans whose lives meant nothing. And we treated them like that. I remember this one time we pulled a ninety year old woman from her house and set it on fire. She tried to stop us of course, charged at us and gabbering in her gook speak. We put her down, then tossed the body in the fire. Didn't know why we burned it. I asked my officer what the military value of a straw hut was, and till today I haven't got an answer. And that's the truth Peter. No one knew what we were fighting for. Oh, they said it was against communism but hell, none of is even knew what communism was. At some point we started to wonder why the gooks were charging us with WW1 era rifles, so we could figure out why we were invading by taking the reverse of their goals. And it turns out they were fighting for independence. They did it for a thousand years against the Chinese, five hundred against the Mongols, a hundred against the French and now us. Truman, Eisenhower, LBJ, they all lied. We weren't there to fight for liberty and freedom, we were there because our government is a crooked bloodthirsty cabal of liars who'd rather spend a trillion dollars dropping bombs on rice farmers halfway across the world then spend it on healthcare and education. I was wrong, Pete, don't make my mistakes again.

>With great genes comes great responsibility, responsibility to not mix them with sub-humans like Negroes and Hispanics.

And this movie came out not to long ago..

...

kek

It was a different time

>I'm somewhat of a pedophile myself
Raimi must have been in a dark place at this time in his life

*LOOKS AT CAMERA*

youtube.com/watch?v=lknrWK_rhb4

BETER

>I wanna... act. On stage.
>Really? Well that's perfect. You were awesome in all the school plays.
>Really?
>Yeah. I my jerked my little cock off till it was red raw when you strutted on stage as Cinderella.
>Peter, that was first grade.
>Well, even so...

Yeesh, talk about a different time.

Choked on my food.

...

I didn't expect an actual redpill in a Raimiposting thread, nice

>p-peter crash the planes with no survivors
whoa whoa

Fun fact: Kevin Spacey wrote that line uncredited

>P-Peter, I've....seen things....you wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I've watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser gate. All these....moments....will be lost, like....tears....in the rain. Time....to die.
what did he mean by this?

not funny apply yourself

>Ni-gger

youtube.com/watch?v=SThRvg6cdQI

>T-the jews did 9/11... Don't tell Harry.

Did Raimi cross the line?

>What's your name, kid?
>The Human Holocaust
>Jesus. You could have at least named yourself after something that actually happened

I get that this line was only in the Director's Final Chinese Bootleg Cut, but it seems crazy that we lived in a time where that was okay.

Peter...a fucking r-raghead in a truck ran me over...

Me, sarcastic: "Nice opinion, kiddo."

>Peter... I need you to get rid of my porn collection... Magazines, videos, some security footage I bought on the black market... There are snuff films in there, Pete. If your Aunt May sees all the pictures I took of her feet while she was sleeping... It's all in the box in the basement labelled "Baby Pictures"... Before you ask: yes, there are baby pictures in there, they're just not of you... Actually, they're a part o the collection, but that doesn't matter now... You've gotta do this for me, Pete. You've got to destroy my porn stash... And I mean DESTROY that shit, kid... Seriously, the hentai alone is enough to get a man put away... Hentai is the Japanese word for "pervert", son, and that's what I am... That's what your Uncle Ben is... All the fat globs of semen I've wasted masturbating to bestiality and vore over the years... And I'm a strong ejaculator, Pete... I'm as sterile as a surgery room, but I cum like a geyser every time... I think part of the thrill was always seeing if I could get any of it in my mouth... The first time I did it was a complete accident, but the taste, Pete... The taste was unlike anything I had ever experienced before... I started to crave it... It was like a drug to me... And that's coming from a guy who did a lot of blow in the 90s... Usually off of the ass-cheeks of some coked out hooker who me and the boys would kill for sport later... I actually have some footage of that in my porn collection... Which, again, you REALLY need to get rid of... I cannot overstate the importance of wiping that shit from the face of the Earth... Okay, what else, what else? Oh, you can have the slice of cake from Aunt May's birthday that I've been saving... I mean, I took a bite out of it, but it's not like I have herpes or anything... Wait... Do genitals count? Never mind, I'm dying now... In summation: great power, great responsibility, burn my porn, eat my cake... Bleh...

...

>This Sunday... the postman is going to deliver a package to the house. Don't let your Aunt see it. Dispose of it immediately. It's a realistic latex sex doll in the shape of a 5 year old child. A child, Peter. Yes, I couldn't resist the cunny. I craved and I coveted and I yearned. That wave of unsolved child abductions 10 years ago here in New York? That was me, Pete. Your uncle Ben. But I've changed my ways. I've changed, and you can too. Recently, I felt that evil fire rekindle deep inside me. I feared of relapsing so I ordered the doll to quench those urges without hurting another soul. They are made in the Phillipines by master craftsmen and modeled after real kids. The shipping alone is over 2,000 dollars, Pete. I emptied your college fund for that doll, Peter. Forgive me, Pet-

>Peter Parker: I'm responsible...
>May Parker: For what?
>Peter Parker: For what happened to Uncle Ben...
>May Parker: But, you were at the Klan meeting, swearing to protect the Aryan race.
>Peter Parker: He drove me to the Klan meeting, but I never went in.
>May Parker: What do you mean?
>Peter Parker: [sobbing] I went to the Library where I thought I could learn about Civil Rights and racial equality, because I wanted to impress Mary Jane. It happened so fast... a white man asked for some change and I told him to check his white privilege, then he got robbed by a black... the nigger was running towards me... I could have stopped him, but I didn't want to look racist... I let him go, I let him get away. He wanted a car, he tried to take Uncle Ben's. Uncle Ben said "fuck off nigger"... and then he shot him. Uncle Ben was killed that night for being the only one who stood up for the white race. I held his hand when he died... I've tried to tell you so many times...

It became too indulgent when he started talking about ejaculating in his own mouth

The scene afterwards where Aunt May walked up the stairs and hanged herself with an extension cord was pretty poignant I think.

How could Peter let that happen?

>Uncle Ben said "fuck off nigger"
It's so simple yet so funny

the "in summation" always gets me, this copypasta is classic

beter...

Bravo user

>all my life I've derided minorities and elevated whites above them in my mind
>and now, as I lay dying I have to face the fact that it was a white man who killed me
>actually uncle Ben I think he looked italian
>oh... thank you peter... thank you

kek, this is a slightly worse version of the og copypasta but still funny

>This life, Pete, it ain't easy. It's punishing and it's unforgiving. It is going to test you and it is going to break you. Now, in order to prevent that from happening, you need to be tough, Peter. You need to be strong. You have to get a grip on life. You have to make a fist and clench life by its throat... Now, Peter, I am going to take my pants off, slowly. And you're going to show me just how strong of a grip you can muster.

Lol

What’s te OG one?

...

Fuck, the white man's burden pasta is the best, I don't see it in these threads anymore

seriously, his Vietnam flashbacks were the only unnecessary thing about Spiderman. Otherwise the movie was great

I will give you something to choke on ;)

>You know what? Fuck you. Get the fuck out of my car

everytime

would spiderman even be capable of stopping 9/11?

These always the best threads on Sup Forums

>sneedposting dying
>raimiposting rising from the ashes

My will to live has increased.

Still the best. If someone ever makes a fan edit of the movie this one needs to be in

Just when you thought you've seen it all with a meme, you get one more laugh out of it.

>Don't believe it, Peter
>Don't believe a word of it.
>The Kikes behind the Media have been cooking up White Genocide for years and years
>And now that the water has been brought to a seething boil over the stove, it's time for them to make their next move
>Anything you see and read on tv or the newspaper regarding minorities in a positive light but spinning whites in a negative one, is fake news. Fake news, Fake news, Fake news.
>Say it aloud with me, Peter, together "Fake News"
>Good, remember that, It's fake, all of it. It's all fake Peter
>We were led to believe Hitler was the bad guy. We were led to believe Nazis are the enemy
>We were told Jews were burned to ashes by the thousands on a daily basis, when in reality, it would be impossible to turn thousands of human skeletons into ashes everyday for years
>It doesn't add up Peter, it just doesn't add up
>Now don't get into trouble and enjoy the Library, I'll pick you up at 8.