Why did the best Bond have the worst movies?

Why did the best Bond have the worst movies?

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That's not Timothy Dalton....

Hahaha, good one!

Because he had the best games

License to Kill was some comfy Young Benicio kino

because he wasn't the best bond, he was the blandest bond
goldeneye is kino tho

Does this look like the face of a killer to you?

most of those old movies are actually trash as well

90's meant no cold war which was the entire impetus behind spying and James Bond in general. With the Cold war over I remember there being talks from not only MGM but also just normies in general thinking hat Bond is over, a relic of the past, etc. So the writers had to come up with more fanciful scenarios and cram them full of action to compensate for a lack of real life believably in hopes that the franchise could become known for its' superficial aspects (women, cars, action) instead of hat actually made Bond well, James Bond.

What they tried to do with Daniel Craig, Dalton had already done.

I love listening to him just ramble his lines incoherently. That's not even sarcasm.

Absolutely

This ! The best Bonds got the worst franchises !

I'm looking at you George Lazenbury !

Let's look at the Bond villains by Bond era:

>Connery (only the official ones)
Scientist with great handshake, shark-hunting assassin, gold dealer and enthusiast, SPECTRE's No. 2 NIC, SPECTRE's HNIC (twice)

>Lazenby
SPECTRE's HNIC

>Moore
drug-dealing literal HNIC, assassin and gold/midget enthusiast, hydrophilic megalomaniacal shipping tycoon, same as previous guy but loves space and is a shuttle tycoon, fucking general veers helping Ruskies, fucking dr. arcane helping Ruskies, Nazi Bill Gates

>Dalton
Ruskie bros and Bin Laden's opposition, cop-killing drug smuggler

>Brosnan
ex-MI6 doing a big league bank robbery, megalomaniacal Rupert Murdoch type, cuck terrorist helping his snobby crush get her stock prices up, best korea double agent

>craig
high stakes poker player slash terrorist for SPECTRE, 3rd world political mover and shaker for SPECTRE, ex-MI6 hacker slash all-around badass for SPECTRE, HNIC for SPECTRE

Die Another Day was the only one of his movies that were truly bad. Goldeneye was great and Tomorrow Never Dies and The World is Not Enough was decent too.

>there are people on this world that think craig is the best bond

>tomorrow never dies
>media encourages war to boost profits

I thought it was a silly idea when I was 13. I didn't know how true it was.

>worst movies?
Sorry but I have a blind spot when it comes to Bond movies. I love all of them. And I found the Brosnan era to be particularly entertaining.

Craig ist the best Bond
Everybody else was too soft. Bookmark Bond is a hard cynic man not a dorky playboy

Book Bond*

t. gen-z

I think Dalton was a better Bond but Brosnan was my favourite. Everyone has their own opinions on his films but.
>Goldeneye is better than Casino Royale in introducing Bond to a new era while keeping Bond Bond
>Tomorrow Never Dies isn't as shit as a film that was rushed out that fast could've been
>The World is Not Enough isn't as bad as people make out
>Die Another Day is bad but QOS was even worse

t:brainlet

He's closer to the book Bond in some ways but he strayed further away in others.

in what other ways?

Goldeneye and TWINE were very good Action films and that's what the Bond movies are: Action films.
Except for maybe FRWL, which was a decent spy thriller.

Book Bond was still a bit more suave and was almost borderline autistic with his drink/smoke/suit orders. Craig's seems like this rough thug type that wouldn't know the difference between a Brioni or a Hugo Boss suit

I would go even so far and say that this is one of the best action films of the 80s. For some reason almost nobody mentioned it when it comes to the best action films of this decade.

Goldeneye is great.
Tomorrow Never Dies is massively underrated.
The World Is Not Enough is trashy but fun.
Die Another Day is fucking awful and definitely the worst Bond movie of all time.

So, two good, two bad. Moore and Connery did way more bad movies.

As for the rest of them.
Lazenby's film is kino. If you don't like it you're a fucking pleb. It's the perfect James Bond movie.
Dalton's first movie was merely good but License To Kill was fucking awesome.
Craig's movies are boring. Casino Royale and Skyfall are mostly good though. Quantum Of Solace is bad but not as bad as people think. Haven't seen Spectre.

>imploring tomorrow never dies is bad
consider deleting urself my man

Connery, Dalton and Craig are all above Brosnan.

That mouth though

Is there a more divided fanbase than the Bond one

The capeshit fanbase.

The real question is what movie had the best title opening music?

Casino Royale, View to a Kill and Thunderball in no particular order

OHMSS, Tomorrow Never Dies, and You Only Live Twice are my top 3. Goldeneye and Goldfinger are also pretty sweet. Also Live and Let Die. Craig era songs are the fucking worst tho.

Goldeneye, You only Live Twice, Live and Let Die, Goldfinger and Casino Royale are my top 5. Worst song of all time is Spectre. Fuck that film and fuck Sam Smith, they lure you in with a cool Day of the Dead intro in Mexico City and then the song starts and it's like a pat on the shoulder saying "it's all downhill from here, might as well clear out now".

>Craig era songs are the fucking worst tho.
I can appreciate Skyfall though. It tried to go the Shirley Bassey route after alt-rock bands and Madonna shat the franchise up. It didn't succeed but it was a good attempt.

You're right. I totally forgot about that one. That one is probably my favorite of the 4. Cornells is good, too, but not my cup of tea for a Bond song. The other 2 are horseshit.

youtube.com/watch?v=V-1HaEqDIdw

not the best but jesus christ the chorus keeps repeating in my head everytime I hear it

This was my least favorite of the Brosnan ones. The Garbage and Sheryl Crow songs were surprisingly good and still hold up.

>implying Goldenye was a better game than Everything or Nothing

I forgot to reply but summed it up perfect

It undeniably is

Unironically Skyfall.

and nightfire was better than both of them, what's your point?

mhmm, no, sweetie. Brosnon had 3 terrible films and an above average one in Goldeneye. Dalton had 2 average films.

Good rebuttal faggit.
Goldeneye has aged like absolute shit, yes it's playable and it was revolutionary, but today it's nothing special.
>clunky controls
>one dimensional
Whereas EoN has timeless vehicle segments, an original story, very good third person action that has variety in it, and a fun story.

Fuck you, license to kill is the best bond film

Anybody else think that Quantom of Solace is the all time worst Bond movie? The shit old ones are at least campy.

These with the Spy Who Loved Me being the best of all time.

youtube.com/watch?v=at7xLnfubFY
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Special mention to Licence to Kill.

youtube.com/watch?v=Pw8_LTu07Jo

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>Dalton's first movie was merely good
living daylights is fantastic, fucker

view to a kill. also greatest disparity in quality between the title song and film

I love Living Daylights. The Cello ride is wonderfully camp, the Gibraltar opening is high adrenaline fun. There's that cold war vibe going on, and Necros is a convincing threat. The punch up on the back of the Hercules with the bomb ticking, and the Afghan battle are nice for light-weight Rambo fun. Good score too.

Admittedly the Bond Girl is a little bland, and the primary villains of the Ruskie and the Arms Dealer both fail to make an impression. Still, Dalton's my favourite, because out of all the Bonds, he's the one I could imagine putting a bullet into me without flinching.

True.

Fun fact: Dalton knocked up the same Russian broad who neglected to blow Mel first, before the fucking jacuzzi

TSWLM had the best opening tune, the best opening scene with the ski chase and the best opening credits with all the gymnastic ladies etc. A triple whammy.

>"""timeless vehicle segments"""
>getting the vapours over a dated video game

Mel who?

Until you realise Nobody Does It Better is a song explaining Roger Moore is the world's greatest lover :p I love the opening to The Spy Who Loved Me but that synth new wave OST is fucking dire.

>I love the opening to The Spy Who Loved Me but that synth new wave OST is fucking dire.

The funky take on the Bond theme for the ski chase is amazing.

youtube.com/watch?v=_kyQauA2udc

user, I highly suggest you Google "Mel blown before jacuzzi" and listen to the first audio/video that pops up

Its real fucking close between that and Die Another Day but yeah as you say at least DAD is campy. QoS is just trying to be a knockoff of Robert Towne's Jake Gittes movies with the action of Paul Greengrass' Bourne movies and it fails badly at both.

Walkin was a good villain though.

Goddamn that song is like the Duke of New York's theme mixed with Logan's Run noises laid over the Bond theme.

Question: which Bond girl had the most disappointing tits.
Answer: Barbara Bach

I'm actually trying to think if there are any Bond girls who's tits we've not seen. I hope not.

>which Bond girl had the most disappointing tits
Teri Hatcher?

>Answer: Barbara Bach

Do they really look bad when unleashed? Look pretty good in the film.

Bond is a functional alcoholic with PTSD that the government use as an assassin because he has no family or friends that will ask questions when they need him to disappear.

Connery nailed the alcoholic part. Craig nailed the PTSD part.

Damn, that's really a tough call. Apples and oranges of bad tits.

hmmmmm

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There's an incredible amount of technology available to turn even the smallest, most disappointing A-s into C+ cleavage. Maureen Ponderosa from It's Always Sunny is a great example of what kind of cleavage enhancing technology we have available today.

Natalya Simonova is the best Bond girl of all time.

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The best Bond opening is an opening from a game that was inspired by Bond openings.

jesus christ that's one helluva fight

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Is it just me, or does Lazenby look like young Roger Stone's handsome brother.

She is quite gorgeous.

niggas just need to deal with it.

it definitely has the best bond song imo

I've had fun putting mine in order.

>Goldfinger
Fort Knox, incredible cars, great locations. Marvelous acting.
>You Only Live Twice
Meeting Blofeld, the Volcano battle, the Kobe camera shots
>The Spy Who Loved Me
A great foil for Bond. Amazing sets, Jaws, action pieces. Awesome dialogue and opening.
>The Living Daylights
The Cello Chase, Necros, Hercules Airborne fight, Gibraltar duel. Dalton's mix of Pro Cool Assassin and charmer.
>Her Majesty's Secret Service
George has a solid start. Skiing scenes are awesome. The emotion Lazenby shows in the finale too...
>For Your Eyes Only
Moore doing cold espionage work. Intense mountain climbing, and the cold way he kicks the assassin off the cliff.
>License to Kill
Awesome opening song. Great to see Bond become a psychopath before it becomes par for the course with Daniel Craig
>Casino Royale
Excellently shot parkour chase, and a movie that takes its time and breathes. Plays for suspense and keeps you on edge
>From Russia With Love
The opposite to Casino Royale, this one is long and laborious, but Connery makes it an enjoyable stroll. Nice as it feels like cold war espionage

It can verge on feeling like a television murder mystery film sometimes, but I love it anyway.

>Goldeneye
Great new direction. Fun villains like Sean Bean and Thigh-Lady coupled with good gadgets and an intriguing plot and tank chase make it a winner
>Tomorrow Never Dies
I have a soft spot for Jonathan Pryce's campness. BMW chase + action scene on the boat make this a bit too guns blazing, but as a switch your brain off, I love it about on par with Goldeneye
>Skyfall
Ridiculous nonsensical plot saved by beautiful cinematopgrahy like the silhouette punchup, awesome opening, and Judi Dench's stellar role.
>Live and Let Die
Really fun speedboat chase, Yaphet Koto is a cool villain. Love the blend of supernatural elements. "Names is for tombstones!"
>Thunderball
Beautiful filming locations but slow slow slow. Bond technically rapes a nurse, gets lucky on being in the same hospital as a spectre agent, and the diving scenes are slooooow.
>Man with the Golden Gun
Boring as fuck and daft as hell, but did enjoy the concept. What could have been....
>Dr No
Dated espionage thriller in the Caribbean that has Ursulla Andress make us swoon. Not bad, but cheap and tacky.
>Moonraker
I hate hate hate this movie... cept for Jaws having a happy ending, and Michael Lonsdale's gravitas. Since Day of the Jackal I've loved this actor.

>A great foil for Bond. Amazing sets

Worth it for the submarine set alone. Based Pinewood.

>The World is Not Enough
Boring. Just boring. How do they make a submarine in istanbul boring?
>Octopussy
Great filming locations but the overdose of campness and nonsensical plot are unbearable.
>Quantum of Solace
Bond goes for revenge by blowing up a Bolivian hotel made of nuclear reactors. Oh and Quantum are as easy to identify as Team Rocket. Editing is unbearable.
>Spectre
Depressing as shit, and spoiled by a Blofeld about as intimidating as Tommy Wisseau. Seriously, compare "Cuckoo" to "Cheep Cheep Cheeeeep". His evil plan is to do what Google does anyway. Spy.
>View to a Kill
Duran Duran and epic Walken cannot save a tired and almost paedophilic Moore's final outing.
>Diamonds are Forever
Old man Connery warbles and waddles through Nevada looking for Blofeld in drag. Oh btw, didn't you kill my wife?
>Die Another Day
Surfing CGI aside, one of the best openings ever. DMZ hovercraft gun battle and 007 tortured to Hell. Then it gets utterly utterly crap. I can forgive the solar laser, but Jinx + the Invisible car are enough to make you pop a cyanide pill.

definitely. I think this is why it and you only live twice rank so high on my list.

The sets in some of these movies still floor me. This one in particular.

Quantum of Solace is rightfully rated low, but it has that one amazing scene when Bond is listening in on SPECTRE's secret conversation. Now if only the whole goddamn movie was filled with stuff that good...

Lazenby is the only bond I haven't seen. Am I missing out or is he a meme

I actually liked the opening car chase and thought it was the only time the frantic editing fit the scene. Also liked the opening song but not the accompanying credit sequence.

It goes downhill really fast after that though.

I would kill to visit the 80s for a week

You should definitely watch it. It's actually quit good. Most seem to rank it fairly high on here, too.

I found the biggest problem with QoS was Quantum. They're bigged up as as Mafia Illuminati. Then M's own bodyguard is one of them. Then Bond gets all their photos at the Opera.

So they're awkwardly wrapped up as a tendril of Spectre. But then Spectre are proved to be inept when they're led by Brother From Another Mother Bond, whose modus operandi is to be Steve Jobs.

Not a fan of QoS's opening car chase, but the fight on the scaffolding whilst suspended by a rope was fun.

I would kill you so you couldn't visit the 80s for a week. Also checkd

I maintain that SPECTRE would have been a better movie if it was 30-45 minutes shorter

look at that fucking lighting holy shit. That was a good set.

Richard Gere's one lucky SOB

A little of both. I think the movie suffered from lowered expectations. It was the first time they changed the actor and I guess they decided to lower the budget
Just in case so the action scenes use this sped up shit and a lot of clumsy blue screen work.

As for Lazenby he spends a lot of the movie playing Bond playing a character which is a pity.

She reminds me of Terry from Friday the 13th part 2.

I loved the interiors as well.