Star Trek /Discovery/

Did you clap?

I was hoping the distress call was Prime Lorca ;_;

I shit myself and ejaculated simultaneously. Sweet, sweet /trek bliss.

That is a really cool design for the Enterprise. I'm glad they went with that instead of just making it look like TOS ship.

When Sarek dropped all of the red flags I was expecting something edgy like "VULCAN GOT DOUBLE DESTROYED BY THE ROMULANS!!!". Seeing the Enterprise and hearing the music over the credits made that scene kind of endearing and whimsical.

before i watch the second half of the season tell me if lorca dies for good and/or crouching tiger hidden captain comes back for good

yeah, now it just looks like any generic modern design of the old

should have done it like ENT

You're generic.

That would've been retarded.

so was ent

Of all the things STD has done to the franchise, I think adding greebles to the Enterprise is a really petty thing to obsess over.

It looked so out of place and just amplified the arguments about Enterprise looking more advanced than future ships.

so?

>ugly clunky glowy bits vs sleek minimalistic design
what a bunch of memers

That looks like fucking shit

>Minimalism
A word used by the lazy to pretend they aren't plebs.

it's just a word you fag

So it's 2256-2257 in Discovery, right?
In the Star Trek (2009) film it's 2258 which means Christopher Pike would be the same age as he is in Discovery, which means they would be retarded not to get Bruce Greenwood to play Pike again. He's was the Gil Garcetti on American Crime Story so doing TV shouldn't bother him and he shouldn't be that expensive either.

>a word is just a word
I'd post one of those retarded wojaks you're not worth the effort to find one.

Help out a Trek brainlet here.

What was the reveal of the Enterprise supposed to show? Just a plothook for the next season in what was a pretty lackluster season finale? Was I supposed to be hype about it just being there?

I know fuckall about the different continuities and if this has any implication...

They won't get Greenwood the same way they didn't get the 2009 movie version of Sarek

It's literally "clap because it's the enterprise".
Probably the next episode next season is going to involve the Enterprise, but no one will really give a shit, because it isn't any of the crews we knew.
Pike showing up in what is clearly neither the Prime universe nor the JJverse is basically irrelevant. They might as well have a time travelling Enterprise with the crew from the start of Generations.

>the crew from the start of Generations.
sign me up

Shit, I forgot about that. Greenwood is the only version of Pike I liked, it was one of the best things about J.J Abrams-Trek.

I don't think Pike will actually be in it anyway, it's just cameo shit

Keep in mind, this wouldn't be the same crew.
I mean they could claim it's the same crew, but they can't even follow the continuity they established* in their own show, so it wouldn't really.
*-All the houses coming together at the threat of Kronos, even though they all are stationed in different parts of Klingon space and don't give a shit bout Kronos or their religion according to older episodes.
And that's not even mentioning the two fucking speeches about how creating a religious military dictatorship that crushes all dissidents under its heel on threat of mass extinction is both in line with Starfleet's morals, and is a proud and honourable act on behalf of the Klingon Fundamentalist that they've put up to the task of dishonouring every single Klingon tradition that has ever existed.

The Enterprise really did not look like it was in too much distress.

isn't it kind of dangerous to maneuver your ship toward a friendly ship like that, what if your brakes don't work

Cringeworthy fanwank because they know the show is complete and utter garbage but dumbass general audiences will eat up any horseshit if they can clap at fankwank things they know.

The ship looks nice but it's pure shallow fanwank and basically proves that Discovery is not Prime-time.

Really? Just look at it!
Clearly the Green Hand has been fucking with the hull with its JJVerse Space God playset.
The shame and humility Pike and his crew must feel for allowing their ship to come to such conditions!

>it's a marysue burnham lectures everybody and is right about everything again episode

How does it prove that it isn't the Prime timeline?

To be fair, Discovery Sarek is an upgrade, the 2009 guy was a non-entity.

And Winona Ryder Amanda was probably way unobtainable.

How does no visible plating seams and matte colouring look less advanced?

Yes Lorca was revealed to have been a Trump supporter all along, so was stabbed with a sword by Mirror Phillipa, who is a fascist dictator. In return for the yass-queen-slay act, Evil Phillipa was allowed to come back to the normal universe and was turned loose to wander the stars, slaughtering non-humans as she pleases.

Rate my Discovery Fan fiction Sup Forums:

"Gee, golly, gosh, gloriosky," thought Michael Burnham as she stepped on the bridge of the Discovery. "Here I am, the only human to graduate from the Vulcan Science Academy with record breaking scores" Captain Lorca came up to her.
"Oh, Specialist, I love you madly. Will you come to bed with me?"
"Captain! I am not that kind of girl!"
"You're right, and I respect you for it. Here, take over the ship for a minute while I go get some coffee for us."
Mr. Saru came onto the bridge. "What are you doing in the command seat, Specialist?"
"The Captain told me to."
"Flawlessly logical. I admire your mind and I wish I was you and have always been jealous of you for it"

Captain Lorca, Commander Saru, Dr. Culbert and Ash Tyler beamed down with Specialist Burnham to Rigel XXXVII. They were attacked by Klingons and thrown into prison. In a moment of weakness Specialist Burnham revealed to Saru that she was in fact the secret sister of Spock that nobody had ever heard of and the favourite child of Sarek who Sarek loves far more than Spock. Recovering quickly, she sprung the lock with her hairpin and they all got away back to the ship.

But back on board, Dr. Culbert and Specialist Burnham found out that the men who had beamed down were seriously stricken by the jumping cold robbies , Burnham less so. While the four officers languished in Sick Bay, Specialist Burnham ran the ship, and ran it so well she received the Nobel Peace Prize, the Vulcan Order of Gallantry and the Tralfamadorian Order of Good Guyhood, She also in this time ends the Klingon-Federation War.

Specialist Burnham back on Earth gives the best speech ever at Federation Headquarters and the entire Federation stands up and applauds her. Till this very day, Specialist Burnham's birthday is considered a national holiday of the Federation.

It looks like an undetailed plastic toy from the 1960's, because it is

wow the moon is close

It's different from the TOS Connie in looks which okay, whatever, but the TOS Connie has been established aesthetically in TOS, DS9 and ENT.

Not only that, Discovery ship sizes are roughly 3x the size of TOS ship sizes. The Enterprise in Discovery is far, FAR too large to be the TOS Connie.

Pic related is a canon scalling of what the Enterprise would actually look like in front of the Discovery.

Only because it's overlit. If you turn the lights down to standard STD space shot levels, it looks fine.

Perspective, motherfucker.

I just watched the Mudd time loop episode, that was really good.

Why do you fags hate this show?

I think you have talent. With bit of practise you could write STD type of show with ease.

8/10

TOS enterprise with self-illumination. It basically looks fine.

There is a reason that they completely changed how the design looked for the Constitution for the movies. The 60s models look ridiculous next to modern designs.

Even with perspective, the Enterprise is far too large in that shot, the Discovery is fucking massive, the saucer of the Discovery is larger than the entire Enterprise Nacelles and all.
Sorry fucked up, here is TOS Connie with self illumination.

Taking perspective into account, accurate sizing.

>being this buttblasted

The size differences are mostly superficial, and you don't have a good understanding of perspective

Maybe they just keep changing the sizes of the ships?

The NX-01 Enterprise is tiny compared to the TOS Defiant here: Why would the Enterprise be tiny compared to the Discovery when they were made around the same time?

Killing off Lorca bothered me, but then I brought back Yeoh so I was fine.

>confusing contempt with being bootybothered
top kek, as they say.

Biggest issue is the swept back nacelle struts.

While the models line up, the official ship sizes we have been given by CBS do not. Using official ship sizes by CBS and used for the new Eaglemoss models, pic related.

In fact even the Shenzhou dwarfs the Enterprise.

>Yeoh

Never understood why everyone is pulling her pisser around here. Her performance was very stilted and flat.

Official Shenzhou size as well.

Did they just make it a prequel solely so could do stupid fanservice shit like this?

More or less this was the season finale

Cause no one else in the cast could pull off a commanding role since Isaacs is off.

I couldn't give a fuck about the (((official))) size in some bullshit made up data for the press release.

>Saru doesn't even get promoted to captain and has to sheepishly drive to Vulcan to meet his new superior

>Why do you fags hate this show?
Michael Burnham

There is no fucking way that is the size of the ships

art from the Discovery Official Collector's Edition Guide

OMG CLINT HOWARD
OMG A TRILL
OMG THE ENTERPRISE
OMG 2 PENISES

It's literally a design from Star Trek Online for the updated light cruiser

>actually better than STD

This is a third timeline. One where Nero never offed the Kelvin. This should explain away the ships being bigger and having some of their designs seemingly off the Kelvin's

god I hate this nutrek

>le black strong womyn overcomes her anger
>le asian mommy is now evil
>le fat comic relief gets high
>le cuck arab sobs and sobs again
>all together defeat the klingon empire using a female klingon renegade
>le I am the new klingon female leader because we are honorable yet Im blackmailing you to submission with a threat of destroying our world
>le this is what federation is (currently in Paris, not San Francisco

Am I the only one here? Also

>Have we left the SOL system?
>(Uranus obviously in front of the ship)
>Yes, Captain.

This trek is so fucked up its the worst trek even worse than trek parodies. Only redeeming quality is the production design. Why is it made for brainlets now?

Starfleet is in San Fransisco, the Federation Capital however, is in Paris.

>The Federation President's office was located on Earth in the city of Paris, France. (Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country; DS9: "Homefront", "Paradise Lost")

can we finally decide on an accurate call sign for this spinoff?

Its not STD, its not DIS, its not DSC

I'd call it SOY.

Could T'pol still be alive to be Captain?

And why in the fuck would the religiously fanatical Klingon bird want to stop at fucking nuking Earth?

hang yourself polshitter

End game was Klingon unity, the war was just a means to and end. She was given another means.

>complaining about nutrek
>not knowing that the federation hq is in paris

the age of pike in the 2009 film just doesnt line up with what his age should be in 2258 in the original series canon.

pike was a hell of a lot younger. as evidenced in the episodes he was in even if the cage has dubious cannon.

And so they’re just going to relax given that they have a unified government now?

Not to mention Starfleet commuted regieme change and put ina dictator.

So the Enterprise is smaller, harder to hit, more agile and faster to accelerate, has better more compact tech and slips past stuff far easier than that bulky Discovery. Perfect. I guess their distress call was a prank they do to every passing ship to show off how awesome their Ship looks.

>no sex scene
>no quips
its not quite kino

Yeah, I really liked Pike and Greenwood in the Kelvin movies but he is too old at this point. There are a ton of actors who could play him as far as looks go, but Spock is the trickier one if he is on board.

I was tricked. was going to rate it 8/10 but then I stopped to think about the ep and my rating dropped to 6

What if.... this is what the Kelvin Timeline would look like if Nero didn't affect its continuity.

No Spock because rights issues.

I don't want to see a third spock
I don't want to see a third pike

i dont think this is correct as they used his name already and i think even a child onscreen representation of him

they're using the same license as the movies, so might as well get Greenwood and Quinto. Quinto has been doing nothing but watch his co-stars get roles in other films.

>"Gee, golly, gosh, gloriosky,"
sound more like something tea leaves would say.
>In a moment of weakness
you forgot to have everyone else have a bigger breakdown
>You're right, and I respect you for it.
and then they fuck. Its always just a move to butter people up. no real respect

david lynch must be rolling in his grave right now

I got it. STD universe is moving toward the viewer, so everything is blue-shifted. Mirror universe is moving from the viewer, so everything is red-shifted.

So it's finished now? I wanted to wait until it was all out and just watch this season as one long movie.

are you implying the kelvin timeline was different before nero changed it?

or is it a clever joke you're making.

desu the kelvin timeline has to have been different before nero, because pike was born at least 10 years earlier in the kelvin timeline.

don't think people copped this is an edit of the original mary sue text

Honestly it works fine if you don't binge watch it. It's still terrible.

The joke is this is almost word for word the original Mary Sue fanfiction

"Gee, golly, gosh, gloriosky," thought Mary Sue as she stepped on the bridge of the Enterprise. "Here I am, the youngest lieutenant in the fleet - only fifteen and a half years old." Captain Kirk came up to her.
"Oh, Lieutenant, I love you madly. Will you come to bed with me?"
"Captain! I am not that kind of girl!"
"You're right, and I respect you for it. Here, take over the ship for a minute while I go get some coffee for us."
Mr. Spock came onto the bridge. "What are you doing in the command seat, Lieutenant?"
"The Captain told me to."
"Flawlessly logical. I admire your mind."

Captain Kirk, Mr. Spock, Dr. McCoy and Mr. Scott beamed down with Lt. Mary Sue to Rigel XXXVII. They were attacked by green androids and thrown into prison. In a moment of weakness Lt. Mary Sue revealed to Mr. Spock that she too was half Vulcan. Recovering quickly, she sprung the lock with her hairpin and they all got away back to the ship.

But back on board, Dr. McCoy and Lt. Mary Sue found out that the men who had beamed down were seriously stricken by the jumping cold robbies , Mary Sue less so. While the four officers languished in Sick Bay, Lt. Mary Sue ran the ship, and ran it so well she received the Nobel Peace Prize, the Vulcan Order of Gallantry and the Tralfamadorian Order of Good Guyhood.

ripple effects through space-time can change events in the past, present and future.

Think about it. the blue Uniforms that the Kelvin crew have, they easily can transition to the new ones we see in Discovery.

Even if its not intended, I choose to think of STD as taking place in the JJTrek timeline, as the aesthetics and action themes don't seem as jarring. It's not as though there is anything in STD that particularly refutes that, is there?

fun fact: nero's appearance in the timeline also turned sulu gay

this is spot on