Hogwarts School of Wizardry

Let's be honest: would you, or anyone in their right mind, enroll their kid into Hogwarts?

yes so he can have a better life than mine

Is there a reason they wouldn't?

Do people even get a choice or do they just get assraped by letters until they attend?

They could just respond.

They do have a choice, Hermoine said that she needed her muggle parents consent before sending her to wizard academy.

"No!"

"No!"

"AHHHH"

>teachers and students carying assault wands 24/7
"No!"

Some get homeschooled

I'm gonna have to see their test scores and Dumbledore's tuition plan.

As long as it wasn't Hufflepuff since Rowling herself admitted it has a bunch of faggots in it.

thank god she doesn't do a lot of interviews, because everytime she does she says some really stupid shit or just outright panders to SJWs

Are you implying Hermione wasn't black the whole time? You racist!

She has a tendency to add shit years later and pretend like that was the case all along. The entire Pottermore site is a hive of cancer.

And now we got 4 more movies to go with Fantastic beasts and wizard Hitler.

Nobody in their right mind would want their kid to be part of one of the dullest franchises in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"DEH!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King

She never said she was black. She said she likes the idea of her being black and that it doesn't go against anything that's in the books.

>"DEH!"

>and that it doesn't go against anything that's in the books
Except Hermione being white

If it was sorcerer’s stone / chamber of secrets hogwartz sure. Too many nigs after that.

Do you think the students ever go insane and commit Avada Kedavra sprees?

Never said she was white, sweetie.

She did in the books but who cares. I wouldn't mind a thicc ebony Hermione. White girls fuck dogs.

Can't wait until they get an insurance adjuster in there to scope it out.
>I'm sorry the stairs MOVE? Like, constantly?
>You decided to keep a dangerous 3-headed dog in a place students can easily access?
>I'm sorry, did you say your punishment was to take these 11 year olds into the monster infested woods in the middle of the night to search for a unicorn murderer?
And that's just within the first book. The idea of putting hormonal teenagers in the same building and giving them access to powerful and dangerous magic has always been funny to me. After they learned the killing curse im surprised no one used it on a cheating boyfriend/girlfriend or something.

...

"BRAP"

Wasn’t hufflepuff the house where students would have group Masturbation sessions?

they get shown the curses after they've seen dementors up close, im pretty sure most students are quite afraid of azkeban after that.

Wait, what?
Please elaborate.

soy

much better school

>would you, or anyone in their right mind, enroll their kid into Hogwarts?
Why the fuck would I enroll my kid to a school with biased people?

Oh yeah, here it is

>wizards tend to be more conservative with such things
>now lets all gather round for daily group masturbation

what did she mean by this

She's a retarded hack.

...

imagine if it was for college years and imagine the rivalry between Durmstrang and Hogwartz doin Pantie raids of Wizarding School Location
Beauxbatons

>this is your brain on liberalism

british people

Hogwarts doesn't look that big from the outside. How do they house 28 classes of kids in that castle? Do they have magic pocket rooms?

I'm trying but all I get are anime or live-action versions in which everyone's Japanese.

I'm almost convinced she's autistic.

Sure would, take that Russian Twitter bots and White Male Oppressors!

>particularly Hufflepuff
>not Slytherin

i am twelve and what is this

JK is a brainless SJW hack, but that pic is an infamous shoop

One job, user.

What does the original tweet say?

Why was the recast Dumbledore such an unstable old bastard?

I'm calling bullshit

yeah its basically like gangstalking but with giant halfbreeds and magical letters with wings instead of schizophrenia

Hey Zach
Does 8/tv/ know you're back here spamming again?

>BASED BRAKEBILLS
that would have been the best school ever to attend.

Fuck no

a single post better than all the harry potter books combined. I wish there was a early 80's raunchy teen comedy about this.real revenge of the nerds/meatballs sort of shit.

So...this... is the power... of contrarianism...

Woah

Aren't these College Humor photoshops?

They are. Or a fake account by them or something.

>White girls fuck dogs
Is this another retarded nigger meme like "whites can't cook"?

If you use the word "contrarian," you're literally an idiot. It's an invented concept by idiots with reddit sensibilities who are too fragile to deal with criticism of mediocre media that has widespread appeal.
It's a troubling manifestation of millennials' mental weakness. Seriously, the only people who would even entertain any "argument" involving the concept of being "contrarian" are weak, lazy idiots who can't deal with criticism substantively.

If it bothers you that much that people criticize mediocre mass-marketed work designed to appeal to the lowest common denominator, like Star Wars, Breaking Bad, pop music, etc., you should find a safe bubble and stay there(Sup Forums). Or kill yourself.

White girls literally fuck dogs

I want my kids to have a real job one day. What profession Hogwarts even prepares you for, besides Ministry of Magic?

Numales hate LotR though. It's too white and problematic.

I don't understand why that would ever need to be said.