JOXER THE MIGHTY

JOXER THE MIGHTY

HE'S VERY TIDY

HE ROAMS THROUGH THE COUNTRYSIDE

HE NEVER NEEDS A PLACE TO HIDE

WITH GABBY AS HIS SIDEKICK,
FIGHTING WITH HER LITTLE STICK

I'm glad I watched Xena before I hit puberty.

WRITING WRONGS AND SINGING SONGS

BEING MIGHTY ALL DAY LONG

HE'S JOXER!
JOXER THE MIGHTY!!!!

the weak should fear the mighty

The years were surprisingly kind to Joxer the Mighty or at least, he changed very little

And died a hero after years of banging Xena's saucy doppleganger.

best girl

try again

for a long time I thought joxer was played was rob schnieder

ted raimi > clint howard

original Athena was hotter desu

many a load were shot to that one, I'll say!

...

she looks familiar...

I loved this show as a kid

Raimi always gives the people what they want

if thats a joke, its not funny

almost as funny as you thinking Athena 2.0 even lights a candle to Aphrodite

plebs all of you, best girl is clearly Callisto

Totally this.

nope

>she enters her tent after a long day of pillaging and slaughter
>"kneel slave, I've been holding this in for hours"
>she walks over to you as you fall to your knees, turns around, lifts up her leather skirt, spreads her ass cheeks and sits directly on your face
>your nose penetrates her asshole as she gets comfortable, then she releases a torrent of piss into your mouth
>"swallow you worthless pig" she says before sighing as she relieves herself on your face, her supple cheeks clenching your head
>after finishing, she lifts up, turns around and sits back down, this time planting her asshole directly over your open maw
>"I hope you're hungry worm, I've been saving up this meal for you all day" laughing, then grunting, her anus puckers and slowly spits turd after turd into your mouth
>gagging, you are forced to chew and swallow quickly to avoid being suffocated by her long, slimy logs
>she's finally done, "now lick me clean slave, inside and out"
>you quickly use your tongue to get every morsel, every stain until she's completely spotless
>she straightens her skirt, walks a few steps, turns and looks at you
>"you did better than last time, maybe I was right not to kill you along with your pathetic family. I wonder how long you'll last before dying like my last slaves... hmm, well it's FOOD for thought"
>she quietly laughs to herself, then moves to her bed for some much needed rest
>your belly full with her piss and shit, you silently watch her form as she drifts into unconsciousness, wondering what tomorrow will bring...

yes, but her belly button always freaked me out

...

I like how Sam Raimi is given credit when Rob Tapert created the show and character

Raimi was just a producer

This should have been a soft porn series

It was.

here's my favorite pic of those two

Its still Xena herself for me

...

Amen brother

that footgame

...

Velasca is best Amazon

>them tits
>them hips
Many calories were burned to Aphrodite.
Not even close.

Why was this show so good ?

...

The right amount of stupid cheesiness, seriousness, tits, and ass. What I still can't believe though is that Hercules was cancelled and didn't get a proper finale but got folded over into Xena.

>blatant pussy shlicking overtones the episode

>That episode when xena is stuck in a groundhog day time loop and just kills Joxer the moment he wakes her up

I keked.

Very underrated actress. Put aside her hotness, her facial expressions and emoting are top level.

...

blame Kevin Sorbo and his health problems

This universe was a perfect storm of so many fucking likable characters. No one was shit.

Strife/Deimos was a bit too annoying for my tastes, great actor though. Loved him in Cleopatra 2525, pic related

He's also in Ash vs Evil Dead as Baal

action/fighting that was both funny and badass, goofy humor mixed with great character development and memorable dramatic moments

There really isn't any other show I can think of that makes you laugh while also being very invested in what happens

I have some fond childhood memories watching Xena. Would I ruin those memories if I tried to re-watch them today?

Its so weird watching Ash vs Evil Dead and it gives me crazy nostalgia feels for this show. I really hope we get a season 4.

it depends on your current tolerance for camp, personally I didn't watch it until I was an adult and it's one of my favorite shows

Hercules did the same thing but that's kinda cheating.

...

Best kind of episodes desu family

that one episode where xena was trapped in a groundhog's day deja vu and she kills joxer and gabrielle's heart broken

She's as happy about that ridiculous amount of flipping as I am.

Liberal American woman were trying to ruin this show demanding the show be about their Lesbianism. I am glad Raimi never gave in since the thought of homosexuals makes him sick.

I feel that Xena was better when it came to the serious moments, the stakes seemed more real. Also I prefer the kung-fu fighting in Xena over the WWF pro-wrestling stuff in Hercules. Both shows are great though

I will say that the first half of Hercules season 6 is probably the most dramatic and arc-driven portion of either series, too bad the second half is shit

I really like that shot with the knife going in the door.

what about the episode where Xena is so pissed at Gabrielle that she drags her behind a horse and then tosses her off a cliff

Oh shit I just found out the dude suffered 4 strokes during the latest seasons

>season 6
meant to say season 5

this

The Dahak stuff in Hercules and Xena was probably the peak for both of the series

Based, the goofy episodes were great.

>that episode when it's a whodunit and it's actually Argo kicking the victim to death

...

Nani? Was it roids or just bad health? I keep seeing some movie on my cable guide with Sorbo and Susan Saranden but haven't watched it.

...

Aneurysm
Bad luck I guess

in his autobiography he talks about how bad he felt on set after the strokes, you can really see it in some episodes

>it's a warlord Xena flashback with BASED Karl Urban as Caesar
>it's a Xena is falling back into bad habits and getting close to becoming "evil" again

Hercules was just better for eye candy. With Xena, they got lazy about it, like they thought Xena and her prison wife were enough babeage and any more was just gravy, but Xena went around making man-faces all the time and the blonde had kind of a saggy face that hinted at what she'd look like as an old woman, and they rarely wore anything very sexy or acted seductive. With Hercules, they knew the main characters were men and they needed fresh sexy girls for every episode, and interacting with the two male constants, they always had some excuse to make eyes and twist for the camera.

Xena was fun in its own way, but I still remember Hercules as more worth watching.

>it's a xena upgrades her chakram episode

>it's a pure, innocent Gabrielle gets raped by a demon episode

>Lawless
>manface

You're a faggot

They're all going to be black and mexican in the reboot. Nevermind it's about Greek mythology.

S T I C C

>Callisto starts human
>dies and becomes a... zombie?
>then eats Ambrosia and becomes a goddess
>is sent to hell and becomes a demon
>soul is saved and becomes an Angel
>is then reincarnated as Xena's daughter
Is there any arc crazier than Callisto's?

I still can't decide if she is really super hot or just has a goofy face

Why not both? I felt the same for Ilithiya in Spartacus honestly until I saw that hot tub scene.

I didn't say he had a manface. She's a beautiful woman. She's very attractive giving relaxed interviews. However, in her ridiculously overacted Xena role, she usually displayed no feminine charm at all. She makes facial expressions like a man, and it's just off-putting.

Also: you get bored of seeing the same women over and over again.

>dies and becomes a... zombie?
she was given immortality by Hera in Hercules before she became a god

>I didn't say he had a manface.
She. Damn it. That was a typo, not a dig.

zero sex appeal as well since anything men like is anti-feminist

that's right, forgot about that. Some golden apple she made Hercules help her get

>mfw no HD versions

sshieeeet

...

The reboot was cancelled, praise Zeus. Feminist dykes BTFO

She literally did nothing wrong.

Fuck off faggot nobody likes you, society only makes consessions so you'll stop trying to diddle kids and stop trying to use women's bathrooms. They used to burn you along with the witches to save firewood.

"Raimi" is a brand name and people use it to describe the broadly similar family of shows and people associated with those shows that Raimi the man has been connected to over the years.

>they see your penis

...

>Season 2 episode 'The Price'
>Xena leads Athenians against a ghost horde as she slowly descends into the madness of winning the battle

Such a great episode.

>mfw

I just realized that's Kur, son of Mog. Does /trek/ know about this?

Bullshit! Pic related nigger.