Did it never cross Rowling's mind how overpowered Felix Felicis is or how unconvincing it is that a 16-year-old boy...

Did it never cross Rowling's mind how overpowered Felix Felicis is or how unconvincing it is that a 16-year-old boy would use it for anything but perverse activities?

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"No!"

Did it never cross Rowling's mind that not even Felix Felicis would save this film franchise from being one of the dullest franchises?

In the reboot will a black wizard dab?

waiting for a based No poster

deh

its extremely toxic and difficult to make

The perversion potential for Harry Potter magic is pretty amazing.
And then you got canon shit like Centaur rape and giantess fucking

it's hard as hell to make but the book never says there are any downsides to taking it tho. once you learn how to brew it youre set for life

fpbp

Pretty sure they didn't rape her.

im pretty sure if you take more than one every decade or so it would kill you

god damn it all the HPposting is making me want to watch these movies again

>Harry knows that every year he seems to go through some harrowing trial that puts his and his friends life in danger
>Gets the potion equivalent of an immunity bullshit star from Mario bros
>Decides to use it on a having a Ferris Bueller day off instead of using it to save yourself from whatever this years bullshit event is going to be

The books say repeated use leads to addiction and diminishing effects.

Did it never cross Rowling's mind how cruel it is to create such an interesting universe and stopping after only seven books? Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has extremely exciting and unique characteristics when set against the others. One of the many consistencies in the series is its excitement and creative use of special effects, which really helps bring the magic alive and the action ert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series wouldn’t be subjected to the bland directorial style he fell into afterwards with War of the Worlds, Minority Report, and Big Friendly Giant. The profitable cross-promotion for her books was really just an afterthought. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-Fast and the Furious series in its refusal of stupidity, inanity, and lack of logic. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though r-right
"Yes!"
The writing is imaginative and comes off of the page; the book is a masterpiece. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character “stretched his legs” rather than using the duller “went for a walk” expression.

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time I saw a child’s eyes come alive with wonder while reading the books. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so naturally attuned to the Jungian archetypes that govern human thought that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a review of Harry Potter by some guy on Sup Forums. He wrote something to the effect of, “Harry Potter is great.” And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read “Harry Potter” you are, in fact, trained to read Shakespeare.

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Hagrid's dad was literally a fucking BRAP poster from here that got sucked into the HP universe.

He used it to get information vital to winning the war. The books also has him save a bit and give it to all his friends before he leaves with Dumbledore so they survived their encounters with the death eaters breaking into the school.

>Takes 6 months to brew perfect batch
>Batch yields one flask
>Potion effects only last for a few hours
>Somehow set for life

Its not something you could put outright into a book for children, the implications are there
>Professor Umbridge was lying in a bed opposite them, gazing up at the ceiling .... Since she had returned to the castle she had not, as far as any of them knew, uttered a single word. Nobody really knew what was wrong with her, either. Her usually neat mousy hair was very untidy and there were still bits of twigs and leaves in it, but otherwise she seemed to be quite unscathed.

Also Dumbledore's brother illegal actions with a goat

I like it, a nice new ironic spin on an old meme. But Harry Potter is still one of the dullest franchises in the history of movie franchises, seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though r-right
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

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The only perverse activity on display here was Rowling quaffing a dose of Felis Dullicis and birthing the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though r-right
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

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Not based
based

>The books also has him save a bit and give it to all his friends before he leaves with Dumbledore so they survived their encounters with the death eaters breaking into the school
I know, and he saved more than a little bit he saved basically all of it and split it 4 ways between him and his crew. he just seemed much more retarded with it's use in the movie.

These along with the perfectly legal rape drug makes me think wizards are all perverted freaks

they probably just dragged her around a bunch or tossed her back and forth

did it ever occur to you that it's a book for 10 year old children

Slughorn managed to brew a small cauldron easily enough to fill many flasks in the two weeks between being recruited and the first week of term. One tiny sip makes everything go your way for hours.

I'm not saying you should live on the stuff, but having a small vial with you in case you need some luck goes a long way. Life-changing exam? One sip and you've aced it. Important job interview? One sip and you're hired. Trying to hook up with a girl? One sip and you say exactly what you need to say to impress her.

>perfectly legal rape drug

It still amazes me that the girls that were doing this got away with slaps on the wrist for what was essentially mind control. Apparently it's only illegal if you use the evil dark spell to control someone. Potions are A-OKAY.

Well to be fair only Girls were using the potions, the other way around is probably a one way ticket to Azkaban

Great intro lad

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I wonder though if luck absolutely means a guaranteed success in every endeavor. Meaning, maybe luck can't make everything constantly possible.

It's kinda fucked up that love potions are completely legal and even sold in joke shops when they're no different from rohypnol. Boys and girls alike could buy that stuff in Hogsmeade and slip it into someone's drink that evening and they would lust for you.

Based

holy fuck

Someone redpill me on Ginny, why did harry decide to tap that ho?

I thought that shit was almost impossible for anyone but a potions prodigy to brew correctly.
And really bad if you brewed it wrong

Because Ron cucked him out of Hermione so he fucked his little sister

This is the best one so far
Shit poster btfo

The honest and stupid answer is because she was exactly like Harry's mother. However badly written Ginny was ginger, feisty and gifted just like Lily was, and Harry married her to fill the motherless hole in his soul. At least that's Rowling's view

How exactly it makes you lucky is a bit of an open question, it clearly put ideas into Harry's head but I always wondered if it was like Death in the Final Destination movies and if you wanted to do something you weren't physically capable of doing, random phenomena like gusts of wind would turn the world into a rube goldberg machine that will make whatever you wanted happen by accident.

>thumbnail

Ya blew it.

He wanted to fuck Ron but couldn't so he went with the next best thing

Love potions, she just didn't fuck up like Romilda Vane by making it so powerful that people noticed the effects on Harry.

All we know about how luck works from taking the potion, is that whatever you set out to accomplish, you will accomplish. Your head tells you where to go and what to say and as long as you follow that instinct, however weird it seems, things will work out.

It basically alters the universe to play along with you. That's why Slughorn was stealing those ingredients and Harry knew where to go to catch him. If you take the potion before a job interview, something will have happened to the interviewer that would make him think you are the perfect candidate. If you drink it before chatting up a girl, the right words will magically come to you. During exams you vividly remember the exact moment in class you were told the answer to this question.

It's banned from exams and Quidditch so you can assume taking it before a match even alters the skills and state of mind of all the opposing players so they're shit and turns your own team into a hivemind of players who play in perfect unison.

it's a childrens book, read that shit again the plot holes are astonishing.

Also everyone at hogwarts marries the girl they first had sex with and never divorce.
For the savage shit you gotta go to the african and arab wizard schools

I can't be the only one wanting a gritty adult HP story focused on the darker sides of the magic introduced in the story. Aurors tracking down a serial killer who uses Polyjuice to kill people while looking like a loved one, underground dealers selling love potion laced with poison to teenagers, portrait artists trapping wizards alive in paintings

we are not all 16 years old, user

Underageb&

Rather have a new series of one book per international school just to enjoy JKR's laughable grasp of other cultures.

what the fuck was his problem

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best thing is theyd sell like hotcakes in the schools respective countries only for it to backfire because of her veiled racism

idk mang, seems like you are the only one

Must be good to not be Harry Potter who has to use it for plot purposes
>win the Felic Felicis in class
>drink it that evening in the common room and sneak into the girl's dorm
>stairs don't turn into a slide but into an escalator to take me up there
>girls all happened to have a naked pillow fight evening
>house elves happened to accidentally put aphrodisiacs in their drinking water earlier
>once I'm done I slip on my wand and accidentally cast a memory wiping spell on all of them

ABSOLUTELY

BASED

>Aurors tracking down a serial killer who uses Polyjuice to kill people while looking like a loved one
Wasnt there talk about a less child friendly spinoff about Aurors? Or was that a fan project?

What info did Harry even get out of Slughorn by drinking all of it that Dumbledore didn't already know?

Are you thinking about this? I always wondered if it was where the police chief posting came from ()

youtube.com/watch?v=2WhhS2maFEs

That Voldemort made 7 horcruxes rather than another magical number like 3 or 13

based

Not even the amount, only the fact that Slughorn explained horcruxes to Riddle, which Dumbledore already suspected but wanted proof of. It still didn't mean much as Slughorn didn't actually teach him how to make one, and Riddle only mentioned the number seven which doesn't prove that's the amount he was going to make. It was nothing concrete in the end but the plot decided this was enough for Dumbledore

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two fucking based bros showing up at once

Oh shit there it is, saw this years ago, guess it was a fan project. I doubt the police posting came from that though, that fan vid is 7 years old and the police meme is fairly recent.

I don't get it

What's the problem? Prefects can take points from students in their own house but not from other houses. Umbridge's special elite team can take points from anyone.

I've listened to a lot of people who I have a modicum of respect for talk about Harry Potter and how great it is, and what I've noticed is that they talk entirely about wordplay and themes. As far as how mechanically plausible the world is, I've never heard a good defense for it. Harry having the ability to win or lose an entire game on his own, regardless of whatever everyone else on the field is doing, doesn't make any sense as an actual sport - even a child can tell that - but people praise Harry chasing the golden snitch for thematic reasons. Or like why people don't just abracadabra everyone instead of wasting time with all of these other stupid spells, I don't remember that ever being rationalized by anyone, either in the movies or the fanbase.

Book 2 a prefect takes points from a student, book 5 we're told that can't happen. Similarly at one point Molly Weasley conjures sauce with her wand, and in a subsequent book we're told you can't create food with magic.

>Did it never cross Rowling's mind how overpowered Felix Felicis is or how unconvincing it is that a 16-year-old boy would use it for anything but perverse activities?
no

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The Seeker adds complexion (and fun) to the game. They don't JUST catch the Snitch, they have to time it right to give their team the victory, or stop their rival from catching it. It also gives more shit for the beaters and chasers to do, as they try to drop the seeker from their broom or protect their own. In the end, it makes sense they get so many because, otherwise no one would bother and just focus on the goals.

That said, Krum catching the little golden ball in the World Cup when his team was losing was retarded and proof that Joanne never actually thought about anything I just said.

>Or like why people don't just abracadabra everyone instead of wasting time with all of these other stupid spells, I don't remember that ever being rationalized by anyone, either in the movies or the fanbase.
The unforgivable spells are powered by an insane level of hatred. Like, so much that even seeing someone murder your only living relative isn't enough to make them do more than stumble. And you'll go to jail for life if you do it where demons will suck every happy thought out of you and you'll spend the rest of your 100+ year life reliving your worst memories.

I'm sure there's plenty of autistic fanfiction about that.

>HURR WHY ISNT EVERY MALE CHARACTER A DEPRAVED RETARD OBSESSED WITH HENTAI LIKE SCENARIOS LIKE ME

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People praise the wordplay in HP? I like the franchise but I wouldn't name that as one of its assets.

>Or like why people don't just abracadabra everyone instead of wasting time with all of these other stupid spells
There's plenty of explanations for that, whether you like them or not. For one, it's illegal to use the killing curse, and if you're apprehended you'll spend the rest of your life in Azkaban in eternal depression. The spell also only works if you really mean it, as in you have to want someone to die with all your heart and understand what that means for them and their loved ones, only then does it work, which is why only psychopaths can easily use it. Death Eaters use it every time, but even when Harry tried it on Sirius' killer he couldn't do it. It's extremely hard to do that with a conscience.
Snape was only able to kill Dumbledore with it because killing him was part of their plan, so he really wanted to kill him there and then.

Did Helena Bonham Carter have an intense hatred for Gary Oldman? She just seemed like a daft cunt to me. I also don't think people who are already on the run care about breaking the law.

eggcellent

Again, prefects can take points from misbehaving students from their own house, not from other houses. Malfoy can only do that because Umbridge gave him a new position above prefect with more perks.
And you can't create food out of nothing, but you can summon it or use magic to cook food and to combine ingredients. Molly conjured that sauce from ingredients she had right there in her kitchen, that's different from waving your wand and creating a feast out of nothing.

Yeah, Bellatrix is a Black (LeStrange by marriage) and saw him as besmirching their noble house by associating with mugglelovers against the Dark Lord.

Harry is a reflection of all the male readers who identified with him and liked him, a wussy Beta boy. Like most weak white men, he lusted after an Asian because he was getting no attention from his own race. Even worse, she was an OLDER asian woman, Who was already fucking a Hufflepuff on the side, becoming her emotional tampon after her chad died. While other master race wizards were getting Yule ball dates left right and center, Harry was being straight up ignored in spite of the fact that he was rich, the most famous wizard alive, and had just kicked ass in an insanely popular tournament. Even the ginger Weasley twins just gave some bitch a wink and she was ready to slob their knob. And despite some cute little French girl really liking him, sexy Fleur's younger sister, a girl whose family has a lineage of an angelic version of a succubus in their blood, Harry simps out because he doesn't have the balls
to ask her, so he takes a member of the ugliest race on the planet instead, the absolute dregs of Hogwarts the Pravati twins, whom nobody had asked, dancing with their hairy arms rubbing against him while Ginny was outside getting BLACKED in the back of a carriage and losing her virginity to one of the many, many multiracial boyfriends she would have.

Harry Potter is a carefully crafted
Self insert for the a-typical white bong boy, a self hating and unconfident retch who can't win at life even with every advantage handed to him, counting down the days until some prolapsed anus tiger mom gives up at 30 and marries him, passing the time playing video games and watching Marvel movies and masterbating to interracial cuck porn before trawling forums and image boards solely to call truth speakers shills and telling them to go back to their 'racist' boards.

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I don't know who's sorrier. Harry, or you for wasting your time writing all that.

The Snitch is explained in "Quidditch Through The Ages". It started out as an actual bird that was released and the player that caught it would be rewarded with 150 Galleons. After that, it was changed to 150 points for their team, and Seekers were added to be the only ones that could catch it. Then it was changed to a ball when the population of the bird was reported endangered.

I think in professional Quidditch games the teams would rack up a lot more points before the Snitch was caught than in school games, and in particular Harry was just supposed to be a really fucking good Seeker. So it's not as game breaking outside of the books.

>Harry was being straight up ignored in spite of the fact that he was rich, the most famous wizard alive, and had just kicked ass in an insanely popular tournament.
He's generally been despised more than admired for all that, at least with the younger crowd. And don't forget that, at the time, Rita Skeeter was smearing him.

What the fuck did you mean by this?

This, in professional Quidditch it really isn't all about the seeker, they're just there to end the game at the right moment while the rest score goals every 30 seconds. Catching the snitch is insanely difficult and regularly takes hours or even days in professional games. Harry just catches it real quick during school games because no one wants 50 pages of Quiddittch commentary, so the games tend to be short and easy for narrative purposes

I imagine the balls used in school vs. professional matches would be enchanted differently.

Yes, yes, well done Rowling, well done Rowling HOWEVER, some critics have claimed that Rowling's presentation of Quidditch reinforces gender inequality. For example, Heilman and Donaldson argue that the female players ultimately have little impact on the outcome of the game, and it has also been noted that the female players on the Gryffindor Quidditch team have very few lines.

The girls on the Gryffindor team were great, they didn't get many lines because they knew their place

hes half giant

That's a pretty silly criticism, the only other upper year girl that had any lines at all was Cho Chang when she dated Harry. Why would they?

I'd say this is accurate

Although I think part of it was to weasel his way into a permanent part of the Weasley family as well

Hes got no parents and his only remaining family he must go back to once a year are abusive
The characterization fits

Harry also holds fast to what he believes in and doesn't afraid of pain, dragons, giant spiders or dark lords
One time girls planned to sneak him a love potion
He almost cucked ron, but he'd never do that to a friend

Projecting your insecurities about sex on a childrens book doesn't make Harry a beta male.

Sex apparently doesnt exist in JKs world anyway, and harry for most of the series isn't beta, hes asexual

with their giant horse cocks maybe

Hes also regularly slandered in the media and branded an attention seeking nutcase for like 4-5 books

>Self insert for the a-typical white bong boy, a self hating and unconfident retch who can't win at life even with every advantage handed to him, counting down the days until some prolapsed anus tiger mom gives up at 30 and marries him, passing the time playing video games and watching Marvel movies and masterbating to interracial cuck porn before trawling forums and image boards solely to call truth speakers shills and telling them to go back to their 'racist' boards.
Jesus Christ user, I think projection took over from you there.

tv btfo

>deh!

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Why was the textbook recipe for making felix felicis wrong?

>projecting this hard