>tfw you will never be American countryfolk
serious, is there a better life than living like a hillbilly?
hunting, fishing, hiking, brewing, mudding, farming,.....
independence, beautiful nature, no PC, manliness, fun times,...
they are the antithesis of the liberal, weak, effeminate, multicultural america
remember, it were hillbilly patriots who defeated the redcoats.
how does Sup Forums feel about this?
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it's aiight, redneck chicks are fuckin' freaks too tho
I enjoy it tbqh
I, too, am waiting for the Overmountain Boys to return.
R.I.P. Popcorn Sutton.
Pretty good but the government is going to starve us out by shutting coal down. Song related.
I dunno, rural welsh is pretty dope too desu
>hillbilly patriots defeated the redcoats
>revolutionary war was started in the north
Also the south is loaded of niggers, too, In between and including New York and Tennessee is objectively the backbone of America
Hmmmm nothing like getting a handy from your sister who's been miking cows for years then playing a game of "stinky fingers" under the covers while mom's at Walmart
>tfw central IL
>tfw live off the land
>tfw have to have a full time job to afford to work and pay property tax
I just erected a windmill last month, and I'm a low electric user, so it works just fine for me.
I have well water, with hand pumps.
I have 2 oxen, 12 cows, 30 chickens, 3 horses, and 4 acres with a 1 acre garden.
Home was inherited. I have a wood stove for heat and I grow a pair in the summer.
If I need to bathe without electricity, I just heat up a copper sheet and dump it in the tub.
If it wasn't for property tax I'd live the dream.
There is no need for me to pay any taxes, as I receive no benefit from the township. If something catches flame the house will go in 3 minutes. The nearest fire department is 8 minutes away. I live in the center of a corn field. I only use public roads because I'm forced to work to pay taxes.
tl;dr
>Fuck taxes
yeeehaaaaawwww...motherfucker...Hazard Kentucky checkin in
hillbilly niggers aint really niggers ..just colored hillbillys
Fucking this.
I would love to live off the grid/homestead whatever, I could easily supply myself with whatever I need.... Except I am forced to be profitable (aka have a fucking job) to pay the government extortion fees.
It's fucking bullshit. I want no part of roads and services and bullshit, I only want to be left the fuck alone on my own goddamned land.
How to spot a fake Hillbilly:
Fake Hillbilly pretends to be a hillbilly, specifically so he can hate Jews and Black people.
A real Hillbilly doesn't give a ripe shit about Jews or Black folks...
If not for taxes I would be happy. Mostly because I wouldn't have to talk to a single person ever. I can listen to my records, make my own music, and work on my farm all day.
dew dew dew dew dew dew dew dew deeeewww
Pretty sweet life. Hard though. My body is wrecked because of it.
>It's a NEET thinks he can sustain himself because mommy and daddy have payed for everything all his life, but in reality he can't, and when mommy and daddy die he'll be left wagecucking until he dies, because he can't actually live off the land like he thinks he can episode
We have a word for people like you. They're called "bums".
it's an okay way of living
nothing to be romanticized, but it definitely beats being a city slicker
I'm a city spic but have a profound appreciation for country hillbilly lifestyle. Tacos, whiskey and hand rolled cigarettes everyday pls.
My property tax came today
mfw
>how does Sup Forums feel about this?
Stay out Eurotrash reeeee
I've always lived like this, born and raised in this house.
However, shows like Hey Arnold! made me envy city folk. If only for the amount of fun it looked like the kids had.
All I wanted to do was lead our sports team to victory, all I wanted to do was organize a bunch of kids in the town snowball wars. All I wanted to do was run a mock military.
Instead I was forced to stay at home because of a hard working father, and a mother who was addicted to pain killers and too hopped up to do anything.
Dad died, she overdosed, and now I'm going to get married and run a family the right way.
>wanting to be dumb poor uneducated american scum in some backwater shithole
Kys
>central IL
Which county?
McLean here, my grandpa's got 50 acres with a creek we hunt on and fish on. It's a pretty nice mix of country freedom and suburban convenience here.
No offense, but nothing us country folk hate more than a city boy who thinks he's country. Tacos, whiskey and cigarettes are not a country thing.
Moonshine, hard work, struggling financially but in the end always making ends meet, and lots of sex with crazy farmer's daughters is what country life is.
Then we have skinny never-worked-a-day-in-their-life faggots that listen to Keith Urban and drink Jim Beam thinking they're country. I guarantee all of those suburban fucks have never even driven a tractor their whole lives.
/k/
>beats being a city slicker
Not of you have a life and money
Macon County. Live by Boody.
3/4 of my neighbors are Amish. Welcome to trumps America you stupid fucking europoor.
>Life
By life i assume you mean fucking hpv ridden eurowhores that have already ran through the entire aleppo football club
>money
Falling this hard for what is essentially the adult version of carnival tickets.
What a good goy.
I was being facetious about tacos, whiskey and hand rolled cigarettes. I don't think I'm country just because I like to get shitfaced off of bourbon, I know I'm a concrete dweller through and through. Still, I got to grow up visiting relatives upstate who were actually country and thought it was a decent lifestyle. I may not know how to drive a tractor but I can operate a manual transmission and rebuild my own carburetor which a lot more than a lot of these Jiffy Lube patrons around here can say. Cheers m8.
This legit reads like the lyrics to a country song. You're the real deal jeb.
Just needed to vent. I traded my shitty mustang for a work truck, and the kid I traded to was the biggest wanna be red neck I'd ever seen.
Kid wore a cowboy hat, dipped skoal.(At least dip grizzly if you're going to be a dipping faggot. Red man is OK I guess) He smoked Red 100's, wore a john deere sleveless shirt and he was skinny as fuck. And tucked his designer jeans into his shiny cowboy boots.
What ever. He got the shit end of the stick on that deal.
And if I had fast internet I'd upload my country songs.
I can play guitar quite well, but my voice is atrocious.
It fucking blows, Northern Neck of VA here
No food here, within ten miles there's a Mcdonalds, a Hardees, a Subway, and a Food Lion
Internet speeds are butt regardless of how much you want to shell out
It's fun to shoot shit and fish and just sit around and drink whiskey with folks and all that but it's opressively restrictive, all of my friends are either scared to leave or have no social mobility to do so, everybody either works construction or fishes oysters and crabs, It has it's charms but if you went to grade school here you'd see just how depressing this place is, our high school baseball team won states, everybody had college options, one person went and everybody else couldn't due to grades and outside of school trouble, one died from a heroin overdose.
'MURICA
Heroin is really growing in rural areas, and it's sad.
Like, meth is one thing. That will always be around. But Heroin?
My bass player whom I'd known since high school. Amazing bass player, mind you - he died of a heroin overdose recently. In his mother's bathroom. It was really sad.
It's crazy how many high school kids are doing it these days.
Just where do you think some of our hillbillies came from originally?
Hillbillies are the last vestige of true WASP culture
The Northeast has been overrun by foreigners
It's swept under the rug a lot here, a pizza shop owner a county over got busted for pushing coke, it was all anyone talked about for a bit.
olice pull small sting operation in another county, end up with a shitload of heroin, was only in the papers when they posted the mugshots.
[KENTUCKYING INTENSIFIES]
Niggers can't be hillbillies. Nor can Jews, Buddhists, Sikhs, and Muslims.
Jesus Christ lol. Central IL is fucking fake redneck galore. My dad and granddad were both ag professors at ISU (where I now attend) and the number of wanna be rednecks on campus is outrageous. You ask where they come from and it's always some Chicago suburb.
>reds 100s
>sleeveless JD shirt
Kek. This reminds me of a larping relative I used to have. He also ruined a perfectly good 90s Toyota pickup to make it look off road capable. Dumbass ruined the axle the first time he took it out in the mud.
I love the southern outdoor hillbilly lifestyle, but I can't stand the fucking accent.
It's an affected fucking accent. They don't need to actually talk like that, and they do it on purpose and deepen it when they get into big hillbilly groups.
>LOOK HOW COUNTRY WE ARRRRRRRE
Holy shit it's annoying.
Why the fuck can't we bring back the transatlantic accent? That was the most beautiful spoken english in the world.
> t. Mr i have no fucking actual knowledge of hillbillies
did you know they had to load the trunk with concrete to prevent it from nosing over?
There's a burger king about 30 miles away from here, dudes were pushing all kinds of drugs in the meals. Then one day someone accidentally put it in a kid's meal. Fuckin' heroin in a box of what was supposed to be chicken tenders.
It depends on where you are. The universities are definitely full of them. Go outside of that to the small towns and those are full of real country folks.
Those 90's Toytas are fucking amazing. Just need a 1 inch body lift and some slightly bigger tires. How the fuck did he ruin the axle? The hell did he do?
I did. So many GLs lost during the Duke-pocalypse...
Based Popcorn.
Some people do fake the accent or make it over the top but i think thats rare. The transatlantic accent was like a taught accent people learned in fancy boarding schools. To my knowledge it wasnt something you were born with.
By the way, love thailand as well. Not the pattaya thailand but everyday rural thailand is top tier. Minus all the weird jokes about various poultry eating your severed penis if your wife catches you cheating.
Can we get a Redneck Drive film sometime?
Instead of a 73 malibu, The Driver drives a foxbody mustang
Exactly. And they last you a lifetime if you take care of them. Anyways, I wasn't there but I'm assuming he thought his aesthetic makeup was real and got carried away trying to show off in front of his cousins by making maneuvers and jumps the poor thing wasn't meant to handle.
Reminds me of someone I know getting their Suburban stuck. Dude had an 06, i think. Put a 6 inch lift on it, put 37 inch tires on it. Had a 454 in it.
The other guy with him was in an 06 Tundra TRD Off Road. All Stock.
Going down a dirt road while it was snowing outside pretty heavily. Tundra lost it's momentum and got stuck. Suburban got stock. Instead of rocking himself out he floored it and dug himself 3 feet in.
Took my biggest tractor to get him out of there. He busted his U Joint and fucked up his rims in the process. Surprised that's all that happened.
Fuck off.. We're full.. I run the local Farmers Cooperative. I can tell you, there is nothing worse than someone buying 80 acres, moving to the country, and thinking they are big time 'farmers'.. I had one in the spring who insisted that I source her some certified non-gmo day old chicks.
That's how you spot city.. They bury themselves every time.
>tfw you will never be American countryfolk
I don't know that feel.
The tundra driver is a local. He got out in about five minutes. Granted, his truck was lighter, but still the same shit would have happened if he floored it.
>I have a wood stove for heat and I grow a pair in the summer.
grow a pair of what?
Fuck I hate people like that. And those fuckers with all that city money buy the land at top dollar, and outbid everyone else that actually needs it.
That's how the land out here went from 6-7k a square acre to 15,000. Fuck you Howard Buffet.
Balls. Get used to the heat.
'Grow a pair': Slang for having testicular fortitude.
how to detect a fake hillbilly that detects fake hillbillies pretending to be real hillbillies?
"Sometimes them there ufo's will come around in the middle of the night, and then them ufo's will commence to begin a dumping them Sasquatches outta their saucer all over the ground way way up there on that mountain over yonder ... That mountain over yonder they calls it the "Blue Mountain" and they calls it that fer good reason ... because them there UFO's what bring them Sasquatches in to the mountain, them UFO's are all Blue ... like little blue lights just a flittin around that there mountain up there, sometimes they get so thick that the whole dadblamed mountain starts to look like it be a glowin ... blue .... "
Thats when them Sasquatches start eating people, right Old Timer? Yep, little Jimmie, that's when them Sasquatches start eatin people ...
Holy shit. You must live in black dirt country for land prices like that.
Live in a small city in nw florida but I'm only 20 min from dirt roads and endless country/forest. It's pretty great to get out there and enjoy the wild. Plus we have amazing fishing in our bays/gulf of mexico.
Very black dirt. Very fertile. We grow the nation's feed corn and anything with corn syrup in it comes from here. Dog food too. ADM used to be headquartered here. I think they moved to Chicago.
That's spot on my Belgian friend
You kys yuppie fuck
'86 Land Cruiser master race reporting in.
>struggling financially but in the end always making ends meet
What is Duck Dynasty?
Below Tennessee is just nigger land with some white in there for flavor.
I'm Jelly. Always wanted one.
For my mud toy I have a Ford Bronco. Only thing I don't like about it is the independent front axle. Might be doing something about that soon.
>Heroin is really growing in rural areas
And they STILL have impressively low crime rates
I wonder why? *cough* only whites *cough*
It's fucking great out here
>tennessee
>backbone of america
????¿?¿?¿????¿¿¿¿??
pls explain yourself, live in tn and am confused
Wheat and cattle country. Red dirt and the reddest state. I run close to a million bushel of wheat on a good year. Nothing compared to you guys up north and your corn though.
I would imagine that's what my relative would have done. He's the type of asshole who would floor it instead of reversing or putting some gravel behind the wheel. Dumb as rocks.
West IL reporting in; 5 acres of bullshit and 10 acres of overgrown forest.
Absolutely nothing to do out here, high speed internet is a block out of reception, and all my neighbors are on welfare.
St. Louis needs to be fire bombed, black people are a fucking meme.
God bless, Belgium
of course
why else would the jew feel the need to constantly belittle them
It's that corn and soy, mane. Shit is cash.
My cousin has ~1600 acres of corn/soy fields. I don't want to know how much he yields, but he just bought a brand new Ford Raptor upfront with cash, so it's certainly a lot.
Take that gun and shoot yourself maccuck
>You ask where they come from and it's always some Chicago suburb.
And?
Maybe they got sick of being called racist inbred rednecks by all the liberals and minority shit heads to the point they said you know what, fuck them, I'll be redneck. The backwoods were always better than this concrete jungle anyway.
Just a thought
tn here, plenty of spics and niggers, more and more juans coming in slowly and taking over our small towns
Good God, and I thought I had a country accent.
She's a qt too.
They think their trucks are so powerful and big they won't get stuck, and can just drive out of where ever their dumbasses got stuck.
Funny part is the guy blamed the tundra driver for the whole thing and tried to get him to buy him a whole new front axle.
>You stopped so I lost momentum and couldn't get out!
>I have experience from trail riding in the cliffs at Marseille(IL)! I never got stuck there
Because it's all fucking rock you dumbass.
The problem is more that people try to identify as something.
In truth the "Country" people are those that just live their lives in the most feasible way to do it in the middle of nowhere.
Suburban kids trying to be "Country" Try to cater to social norms created by modern country music in an attempt to be cool.
I was once called a wanna be redneck by some fuckass that hasn't paid a damn bill in his life.
They didn't leave suburbia because of being called a racist inbred redneck. They left suburbia to try to "Fit in" by being something they're not.
Small town Illinois is a fucking fever dream.
All I see on my drive to college is corn and soy and everybody has the same incesty forehead and gut. Coming from Texas, the state championing the burgerfat image, people wasn't nearly as rotund or pig ugly.
Must yield a lot per acre. I'm guessing it's all under pivot. How's the water table?
By the way, it's good to talk to people here from the deplorable flyover states, don't ya think?
I live in the thick of these backward savages and I'd fucking exterminate them all and replace them with literal Africans in an instant if I could.
I live in Arkansas with a population of roughly 15,000 people. It's really not that great, literally some of the poorest people. If making meth in a trailer is your idea of what Sup Forums should strive for than you a fuckin retard. Yeah the "muh freedums" are great and all... it is nice outdoors. hell... this would be a pol paridise, popolation is 96% white people. Its actually shocking to see someone with black skin.
the west generally has more "not fucking obese" people. its confusing seeing a fat person walking vegas in 115F weather. like, i know that person is gonna die
>aiight
fuck your nigger dialect. Learn English
Move to a poorer rural state. I pay 300 a year for property thats worth 100k. Chop firewood, sell food, make cheese (cant sell milk but cheese is legl if you age it), turn some home made dosh man. You still have to pay uncle same but around here 300 bucks is 6 truckloads of firewood.
Not under pivot at all. Don't need it.
Not sure much on the specifics of the water table, but we get a lot of rain, and the soil holds said water very well. Plus not far below the soil is a limestone aquifer which helps to keep shit wet, so I guess that'd be a somewhat accurate answer to your water table question.
I myself have a personal farm, never farmed through a coop but the rest of my family does.
Flowers seem to struggle without water, but the corn and soy here has only failed once - in the drought of 2012. That was an awful time here.
And yes it's very nice to talk to irrelevant, uneducated, stupid flyover state inbreds.
Scotland and Ireland.
Hm yea I get what your saying
I'd say what's especially bullshit is them coming up with some imaginary criteria that you need to fit into to be considered ''country''.
>I was once called a wanna be redneck by some fuckass that hasn't paid a damn bill in his life.
What an asshole
Do these dudes actually hunt, fish, live off the land or simply dress in camo and listen to Tim McGraw?