Jury Duty

I've been selected for jury duty the thursday before I start the last semester of my undergrad degree. I cannot do this right now, and if it was any other time I'd be fine giving some dumb nigger the chair or whatever. What's the best way to get out of this either until the end of may or a dismissal? Can I say I'm a student or can I go full red pill and tell the judge niggers are scum? I know you guys, and the infinite love kek brings, can get me out of this.

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You got a job at a small place? Tell the judge work is busy and you being away from work for the length of a trial would place undue hardship on your job.

I'll have a couple of on campus jobs. One is for being a note taker, maybe that's good enough because it's for a deaf guy?

Mention jury nullification.

Oh shit I forgot about that, that might do it. (((They))) won't add me to some list somewhere though I'm assuming?

The fact that you post here means you're already on the list.

What are they gonna do? DOUBLE gas you?

>before I start the last semester of my undergrad degree.
It's before your semester so what's the fucking problem?

If it interrupts school just tell your professors and get people to take notes for you.

Also you can just call the court and ask them to move it, if you have a legit reason... Although it seems like you don't.

Furthermore, what kind of fucking worthless piece of shit are you that you have to come to Sup Forums to get life advice on something as trivial as this.

/thread and fucking saged.

It will obviously go into the beginning you sperg. Unlike you, I'm in a degree where I can't just miss classes and labs. It's a tough last semester and I can't start off on the wrong foot. I came here because I knew I'd either get funny responses or actual stories about similar experiences, kinda like every thread ever made here. Kill yourself my man.

Say you have exams and a wedding to go to. If you are honest with the judge but also make it sound like you just have too much important stuff going on, they will pardon you.

>actually did jury duty

Are you fucking retarded? One of the first things they ask you when you show up is "do you feel you'll be able to be impartial" -- you say NO, you fucking dipshit.

>It will obviously go into the beginning you sperg.
Jury duty typically takes 3 days. If it's the week before, it's safe to assume it won't interfere.

Also like I said, all you need to do is stop being an ineffectualy dick-weed and just call them, and they will move it to later.

So how about you kys my man?

WHY ARE YOU SO TRIGGERED REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO FUCKING SHOW UP. YOU CAN LITERALLY JUST CALL THEM AND SAY 'I CAN'T'

If you have a decent reason they will send you another letter in the next quarter.

Or you could just not fucking go, and when/if they call you just say 'oh I never got the letter, must have been mixed up with junk mail and thrown away'.

This shit isn't rocket science.

I said it starts That Thursday, why can't you read you faggot. Of all of the bad threads occurring right now on Sup Forums, this is really not the one you should be directing your magnificent autistic powers towards m80. Why does it matter 2 u?

I love you guys, and I gladly fought along side you during the meme wars, but my god some of you are the most retarded human beings on the planet at times.

How is it retarded and not legitimate advice?
I've been called for jury duty 3 times.

Also don't fucking meme me and act like missing the first day of a semester is a huge deal.

Ahh I just went for the free coffee and food
I'm irish, if it's free, i'll take it

Oh yeah, and nice how Obama has turned coat for Trump.
But I had this picture from 2014.
Kek was speaking to me and I never listened.

If you don't show up you may find yourself in an even more uncomfortable situation.

youtube.com/watch?v=g8MTqoM59uY

>don't fucking meme me
I'll meme you all I want friendo. I just don't want to fail bros, and I don't need to worry about jury doody right now. I'm just gonna have fun with it if I can gather up the guts to wear my MAGA hat their and drop the word nigger. I guess some
Judges like students more than others, so being a student may be enough, who knows.

Uh, I'm not? I'm just bemused at your being that retarded.

tell them you have school. i got called in and told them that and they have fucked off ever since. don't even remember how many years it's been, probably 5?

I suppose it depends on where you live.
It happened to me this month. I got the letter and then promptly forgot about it.
Guy from the jury office called me the day after and I just told him I never got it, said he'd just put me in for next year.

can't sage your own thread, man

Tell him you know jury nullification so you arent eligible for jury duty.
youtube.com/watch?v=uqH_Y1TupoQ

Only faggot white boys get jury duty. Black men never have to worry about jury duty. Racist justice system won't allow it and they know I'd let the criminal walk especially if he killed a white guy. Hell I'd laugh about it. Fuckem....

You can't get jury duty if you're a felon.

Just say it would cause you undue hardship etc. etc. Otherwise show up. You'll probably be paid enough to buy a lunch just for showing up and if its anything like my experience there's a fair chance it won't go to trial. In the even it does go through, you could always say something along the lines of "of course he's guilty, the police arrested him".

>voted for the first time in a solidly red state just to show solidarity with MAGA
>a month later, summoned for jury duty

Nice digits, but you might be mentally handicapped.

fuggg

That video was pretty cute desu, I didn't need the slave lecture though.

I'm not a felon you faggot. Black men rarely if ever get jury duty because of the inherent mistrust of the law in general.

Fucking savage.

But at OP, just say Jury nullification after a quick Google search.

>Black men never have to worry about jury duty
You can't get jury duty if you're a felon.

You're a stupid faggot for thinking any politician gives a damn about you or your interests. Especially a rich one that's never been broke in his life.

You don't need to be registered to vote to get jury duty. I'm not registered to vote and I was summoned last week. I just started a new job and there's no chance I'm going to waste time on some niggers trial. I went online and postponed it, took maybe five minutes.

You'll keep getting summoned oh mayo eating honky until you do your civic duty and send some innocent minority for prison for life for a nickel bag of weed.

Same exact thing happened to me. All you do is call up the jury commissioner and show them proof you're a student. Then that's it. It's fucking easy.
But the thing is, sometimes the jury only meets once or no times the week you're summoned and it's pretty cool to decide someone's fate. So if you value fucking with niggers more than finals then do it.

I gladly will once I get settled into work. The website said they'll send me another summons in April. If they're non white, they're guilty. Don't care if I have to hang the jury.

Be a man and do your jury duty

You will learn more about law and life in court than you will at a week of school

You get fed and perhaps some compensation depends where and for how long

Don't be a faggot OP

youre literally repeating what my sister's 5th grade friends tell her

you dont think its suspicious that the entire establishment, left and right, tried to stop trump? he represents a legitimate threat to the status quo. isn't that why you hate him in the first place? quit being an idiot.

You don't even need to show up. Check the box that says student and tell them to fuck off, you idiot.

>florida law
>if you want a drivers license you will get signed up for jury duty.

Admitting a racial prejudice should get you off depending on what State.

t. Professional Jury Duty Dodger

Show up drunk.

I mean it, show up piss drunk and just let it all out user.

They're not going to put an alcoholic nazi aspie on panel

Answer their questions honestly and you're more than likely to get dismissed.

Even things like "I've never had a negative experience with the police" is going to raise a red flag in the defense attorney's mind.