How to Christian

>be me
>start reading Bible
>Genesis
>le talking snake and Ark that can hold a gorillian animals
How the fuck do you guys do it? Isn't your rationale insulted when you read this?

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=U-XqAHZiDRo
youtube.com/watch?v=5ZsZLDWWZMs
pastebin.com/xMQ9wAwW
creation.com/the-earths-magnetic-field-evidence-that-the-earth-is-young
youtube.com/watch?v=szBTl3S24MY&t=8255s
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

Yes. To any normal person. The bible has beautiful language but you would have to be a fool to take it as fact.

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I do enjoy reading the Psalms, and I read the Gospel of Matthew not too long ago as well. I can't bring myself to take this supposed "leap of faith". To me, it reeks of "I'm choosing to be an ignorant moron."

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youtube.com/watch?v=U-XqAHZiDRo - Hidden Treasures In The Bible
youtube.com/watch?v=5ZsZLDWWZMs - How We Got Our Bible - Very Important

Learn the Bible in 24 Hours: Chuck Missler
Has God Spoken: A.O. Schnabel
The Genesis Account: Jonathan D. Sarfati
The Genesis Flood 50th Anniversary Edition: by John C. Whitcomb (Author), Henry M. Morris (Author)
Genetic Entropy and the Mystery of the Genome: Dr. J. C. Sanford

creation.com search it for all your other questions

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>How the fuck do you guys do it?

it's written in code, it's basically a manual that tells you how to make drugs and fight wars

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>Thinks Hillary can win
>Thinks there will be a worker's revolution
>Thinks Sup Forums is conservative
>Thinks Sup Forums is Christian
Maybe you should stop making assumptions and try to understand the culture

pastebin.com/xMQ9wAwW

Here you go OP. Ask God to prove himself to you. He will if you really want it but put some effort into it.

>How the fuck do you guys do it?
Start with Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John

Gee, i wonder why jews eliminated that Yeshua guy and didn't become his followers.

A FUCKING LEAF

Reading Isaiah for the easy to spot Prophecies of Christ are good too. Isaiah 53.

you aren't supposed to read the Old Testament, stupid ass.

Then Romans.

>missing out on the prophecies and purpose of Christ
No thank you.

>The bible has beautiful language
אָמֵן

Why the fuck do you want to trick yourself into believing something that so clearly isn't true, OP?

JUST

creation.com/the-earths-magnetic-field-evidence-that-the-earth-is-young

Which version of the Bible are you reading? I prefer the ESV myself.

>>le talking snake

The Bible revealed in Revelations that Satan was the "original serpent" and Jesus called the Jews "Offspring of Vipers" and "You are from your father the devil." Snakes cannot talk, however, if some invisible being were to "puppet" a snake it would appear to talk. What you were reading was an advanced form of puppetry same as how we have cartoons and CGI people in Star Wars now talking where non-existent things interact with humans. It is also a possibility that the snake was not even a snake at all but an illusion created by Satan.
>and Ark that can hold a gorillian animals

The ark could only hold a few thousand animals. Genetics proves that certain species can branch off into different species WITHOUT becoming anything else. A pair of wolves could branch off into all wolves and dogs on earth. A pair of horses into all horses, zebras, donkeys, etc. A pair of penguins into all species of penguins on earth. You don't have to enter ALL animals on earth, only a base pair who will become the foundation of all species on earth.

>How the fuck do you guys do it? Isn't your rationale insulted when you read this?

No, you have to study the Bible with an open mind and think objectively on it. You can also use references that help you understand the Bible better.

>JW.ORG

This. You can't be considered highly literate in english without familiarity with the KJV.
some great literature in there:
"man is born to trouble, as the sparks fly upward"
"faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen"
"consider the lilies of the field"
We have the categories now of history, mythology, poetry. These weren't really defined in the Ancient era.
It is a cultural document, if you see the way jews read it, as opposed to christians, you get a different perspective.

I think OP baited Sup Forums and left.

I read with the KJV and use a concordance for the tricky verses. I like having middle english in my mind as all Gods Word.

It's allegorical.

Read The Case For Christ by Lee Strobel

see

... m8, you never go full retard.

KJV is Early Modern English, my dude. Middle English would be Chaucer, for example, and is much more difficult to read.

>Ark that can hold a gorillion animals
there's only like 100 classes of land animals. species and subspecies can be explained as the result of environmental adaptations after the fluvial period. so basically wrangling 100 pairs of animals in an enclosed space in the span of about 40 years is pretty realistic

The ark was actually the moon. It's a space ship that was built by our ancient ancestors. We came to Earth just in time after burning through all our resources. Our ancestors that survived the journey from the moon to the Earth faced harsh conditions. Slowly our advanced tools broke down and we lost the ability to repair them. Not sure what the rest of the book is about, but the moon is the ark.

I'm here faggot. I was making coffee.

I read the KJV (refer to my op pic).

What is the best argument for sola scriptura?

Why do other christians lump you in with the mormons instead of protestants?

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So this is Scientology?

>le talking snake
>"le"

and no one bats an eye

time to shut this board down

this

the translation explicitly uses thee, ye etc because it's more concise and rigid like actual Greek

not because that was actually how english was spoken at the time it was written

there wasn't "nothing" before God because God always is

God is uncaused because God sits at the head of the hierarchy of causation, which is much more reasonable to believe than infinite regression

2 Tim. 3:16a All scripture is given by inspiration of God

The Greek word translated as "inspiration" is θεοπνευστος, which means "God-breathed." Scripture is stated to be breathed out by God. It is ontologically divine. It is the only source of religious authority which can or does claim to be ontologically divine. Every other authority concedes itself to be ontologically human (even the Pope). The consequence of this should be obvious, namely that Scripture therefore has preeminence over every other source of religious authority.

Nah, this is mental illness mixed with an overload of YouTube alien videos. I love those YouTube alien videos. And the hollow earth ones, and the hollow moon ones, and the ones that say Nazis are in the center of the earth, or the center of the moon. Or the reptile ones, or the shapeshifters, or the piss drinkers. The flat earth ones are good too.

The conspiracy theory ones are getting a little boring to me but they're pretty good too.

When I start up my cult this type of information will be good to know.

prove it

literally the same argument can be used for the big bang. "The belief that there was nothing, which exploded, and made everything after that"

And god doesn't hate gays. He hates the sin, not the sinner.

Start with the NT

the hell are you making coffee this late for

>god hates muh sin

but he created it

What happened to the Christian General threads on Sup Forums? They were very informative.

Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should.

>prove it

Consider it a font of life lessons and stories with meaningful insights instead of a science book and you'll start to see the beauty of the Bible.
>Israel
Classic

Pretty interesting

Unreadable

>Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should.

so why did God create sin?

It's obviously just a work of fiction mixed with non-fiction. The realistic parts of Jesus's story are very likely based on multiple people, too. One of which was named Jesus. Happens constantly in old writings.

It's beautiful too. Stop thinking about the Word as a videogame.

He gives people a choice to do the right thing in life out of free will. You can't have right choices unless there are wrong ones.

he didn't create sin you dumbass

you mean why did God create free will?

>but he created it

Free will you mean? Yes, he did create it. Doesn't mean that he takes pleasure when you sin. If I have a son and he smokes, I hate that he smokes, but I ultimately cant stop him from doing so if that's what he chooses to do, and I don't hate him as an individual because he smokes.

>all these baseless claims

>obviously
Examples?

If life still seems rational to you, then you are not ready for Christianity.

God predestined humans to sin for the following reasons:

1. To demonstrate his mercy, love, and forgiveness in their salvation.

2. To demonstrate his justice and holiness in their eternal punishment.

All things that occur are predestined by the eternal will of God, for the end of demonstrating his own glory and majesty.

Because it's a cool sounding word and he needed to put a meaning behind it but all the meanings already had words so he had to invent a new concept for the word. Read a fucking book man it's not that hard.

Start with the New Testament first. The gospels are the best part.

If you try to start with Genesis, you're gonna have a bad time. The ancient Hebrew feels clunky as fuck compared to the stuff written in Greek & Latin.

itt: atheists who think evangelicals are the only real christians because an evangelical told them it was so

Work, son.

So you're saying god is like Hulk Hogan ripping his shirt off in the middle of the ring? Just showing off how badass he is?

I'm just saying very likely. Almost every other book like it at the time turned out to later actually be multiple people's stories told as one person's. Not gonna sit here and pretend the Bible isn't.

Talking animals and animals fitting on a boat, like in OP. That's fiction.

Jesus, (or the possible multiple people he's based on) had a good message, the rest is just fairy tale.

>chritianity kills rome meme

God did not create son. He created free will, and gave it to us. It was our choice to turn against him and abuse this privilege.

He does not send people to Hell, nor does he send people to Heaven. We choose our own afterlife. Hell, while we do not know exactly what it will be like, is described as a plane of existence that has a complete absence of God. And that's the punishment that shall last an eternity for the sinners and non-believers who refuse to repent. Being forsaken forever.

This. Evil and sin are necessary consequences of free will. Without that freedom, we would be slaves. What would be the point?

Would anyone read a book where nothing happened? Where everyone was good and happy and peaceful for ever and ever and ever? No. You wouldn't read such a book, and I argue that you (most people) wouldn't want to live such a life.

Read The Case for Christ by Lee Strobel

I could take a shit and it would sound better than what you just said.

The snake was satan in disguise. There weren't as many species in those days the ark only had to hold the base ancestor animals. Any other questions?

Romans 9:14-24

What shall we say then? Is there unrighteousness with God? God forbid. For he saith to Moses, I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion. So then it is not of him that willeth, nor of him that runneth, but of God that sheweth mercy. For the scripture saith unto Pharaoh, Even for this same purpose have I raised thee up, that I might shew my power in thee, and that my name might be declared throughout all the earth. Therefore hath he mercy on whom he will have mercy, and whom he will he hardeneth.

Thou wilt say then unto me, Why doth he yet find fault? For who hath resisted his will? Nay but, O man, who art thou that repliest against God? Shall the thing formed say to him that formed it, Why hast thou made me thus? Hath not the potter power over the clay, of the same lump to make one vessel unto honour, and another unto dishonour? What if God, willing to shew his wrath, and to make his power known, endured with much longsuffering the vessels of wrath fitted to destruction: and that he might make known the riches of his glory on the vessels of mercy, which he had afore prepared unto glory, even us, whom he hath called, not of the Jews only, but also of the Gentiles?

>God gave people a choice

God creates universe.
Universe is infinite.
People are literally plank length specs of nothing.

>God the creator cares if a subatomic particle steals kills, has anal gay sex, premarital sex, abortion etc...

admit it, the religious establishment was introduced as means of control of the masses.

which non-fiction books are you talking about exactly that mixes fiction with non-fiction

You're such an insecure atheist. It's a common tale. You have to bash Christians to make you feel justified in your choice. Just live with your choice, and let others live with theirs.

>people who have no grasp of scholarship reading ancient texts without commentary to give some explanation

This is why Evangelicals and anti-theists are largely embarrassing in religious discourse. Don't be part of them.

Evangelicals are the worst Christians. "hurr just believe in Jesus and you will be saved" except most of them are shitty people who act contrary to Jesus's path of self-sacrifice and think they're going to heaven just because they acknowledge a deity in their lives.

Catholicism is where it's at. Basically, if you act like a degenerate, you'll burn in hell. If you truly are sorrowful for bad life decisions, you have to confess your sins, serve a penance, and actively live a better life. Or you're fucked.

Mormons as well seem to be great people in general who live very non-degenerate lives. Don't know much about their church but they're doing something right compared to standard Evangelicals.

I couldn't do it. Christianity needs another reformation and a new morality based on honor, strength, etc. Just "accepting Christ" and "ask for forgiveness and you shall receive" is a dead end

>Talking animals
there's only 2 examples of animals talking in the bible. and maybe you should read the thread like in this post that answers that

>animals fitting on a boat
read

>How the fuck do you guys do it? Isn't your rationale insulted when you read this?
I have 2 degrees and working on a third in subatomic particle physics.
I'm also mormon.
Understand that back then people only had nature to compare things to and that their level of communicative skills are more limited than ours.
Don't take it at face value.
Read the story and gather wisdom from it that you can apply in your daily life.

If god is your dad he doesn't want you to rely on him. He wants you to make your own decisions and live your own life with the wisdom you gained.

>that has a complete absence of God
If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.
pslam 139:8

In Orthodoxy, hell is something like being unable to tolerate the presence of God for eternity

>universe is infinite
wrong

it is neither infinitely large nor do particles break down to infinitely small sizes

>the universe is really, really, really, really big
>therefore God doesn't exist
is really what your argument boils down to, which is a pretty pathetic argument

>not trying to constantly find an objective truth
>not reading things you're uncomfortable with or challenge your current belief structure
>"live and let live"
Reddit is a click away friend.

>not realizing there's a deeper meaning behind it all
>judge entire book with preconceived notions
>fail to realize that old testament and new testament are called that for reasons

Always funny when non-believers open the bible and try to disprove it with biased opinion
Maybe one day you actually remove your bias and read it with an open heard and open mind and actually try to find the meaning behind Jesus's parables, etc

Humans are not specks of nothing. They are eternal creatures, a composite of body and soul, created in the image of God for the purpose of glorying and enjoying God.

This is a false understanding of how one is saved that has become prevalent in some churches. Indeed a person is saved by faith, but this faith is demonstrated through its fruits, which are good works. A faith without works is dead. One must persevere in faith and good works throughout one's life in order to have assurance of their salvation. Those whom God has predestined to eternal life will persevere and bear evidence of their calling.

Good thing any simpleton can tell what's metaphorical and what's not.

Try the Quran. It is much more impressive.

Don't take it literally. The ark story is a cautionary tale about the kinds effects kinds of people have in the world. What happened right before it? Cain and Abel. God let's Kain live, people get a good look at what kind of people spring from bad fruit and how fucked up it can be, you don't see Noah protest the idea and seems to get the they need to get wiped the fuck out, people are considerably less fucked up to the end of time.

Who else /Lutheran/ here?

A new believer who reads the bible at first might think its all allegory.
However, as you read on and study the scripture you will find it takes ITSELF literally, and that creates a sense of dissonance for a believer who does not

youtube.com/watch?v=szBTl3S24MY&t=8255s

This guy's video series answered all of my questions. He uses a lot of logical thinking.

>dur no understanding of religious philosophy, symbology, history, or metaphysics

Fuck off cunt

there are atheists that believe in ghosts or aliens yet have trouble believing the supposed supernatural things written about in the bible. explain that dissonance

OP here lads.

I used to always go to Catholic church and went to Catholic school for 8 years. I don't believe in Papal Authority and I also believe the church is corrupt (pedophilia, etc.).

Since then I have been atheist for a good majority of my life but have now been going to a Presbyterian church. It's pretty good and I enjoy it and the community. But, in short, I have one question: what is the most uncucked Protestant denomination. I don't really have time to go to a new one every Sunday, etc.

Did I trigger you?

IT'S SYMBOLISM FOR A GREATER TRUTH.

THE ANCIENTS HIDE THEIR SECRETS IN STORIES AND SYMBOLS.

HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAVE TO BE SAID?