Well no because

well no because
*brings the mic closer*
every 10 years your cells in your body actually completely change.
i was reading this article about how DMT can actually advance this process into only taking 6 years because your pineal gland- jaimie could you get that article up? yeah but its because your pineal glands can actually make your cells rejuvenate faster ... here we go
*looks over at the screen*
look at that ...
yeah that chimp must be what? 400 pounds? jesus those things will tear you to shreds

pls pls stop posting this, I've seen it way too many times, fuck off back to pleddit you commie scum

this is my new favorite copy pasta

4 real
>here is your underlined post number

Sage and reported

i hear this perfectly in his voice every time

BUCKLE UP BITCHES SWING SOME KETTLEBELLS WHILE SMOKING WEED WHILE BEING HIGH ON DMT AND CBT OIL FUCK YEAH ONNIT BITCHES MOTHERFUCKING ALPHA BRAIN

Joe I know you're there. Pick up. Give me another chance. Let me on again. Let me on the show. What happened? We used... we used to talk. Just pick up. Think about the talks we used to have. Come on already. Have me on again.

WARM UP THE ISOLATION TA

THIS IS YOUR DAILY REMINDER

THIS IS YOUR DAILY REMINDER TO PLUG IN YOUR BLENDERS, HEAT UP YOUR FLOTATION TANKS TO SKIN TEMP (35.5*C)

THE WEED HAS BEEN LIT AND IT'S TIME TO SLAM YOUR KALE SHAKES, TAKE A TOKE & MARK OFF YOUR CHECKLIST

TO POP YOUR:

- ALPHA BRAIN
- SHROOMTECH
- KRILL & MCT OIL
- PRIMATE CARE PILLS

>YOUR FEAR FACTOR THEME SONG ALARM BLASTS THROUGH YOUR HOUSE
>YOU INSTINCTIVELY JUMP INTO YOUR HOMEMADE OCTAGON, FITTED WITH BATTLE-ROPES AND A "WRECKING BALL" STYLE CHIMP KETTLEBELL ACTION COURSE

>AFTER YOUR INTENSE WORKOUT YOU CALL OVER BRIAN REDBAN USING TING BEFORE GETTING INTO YOUR ISOLATION SENSORY DEPRIVATION FLOTATION TANK AND PACKING YOUR MOUTH TO THE BRIM WITH POT BROWNIES
FOLLOWED SHORTLY AFTERWARDS BY COCONUT WATER ENEMAS JUST AS THE DMT KICKS IN AS YOU LISTEN TO DUNCAN TRUSSEL AND GRAHAM HANCOCK HYPOTHESIZE THAT THE PYRAMIDS = ALIENS AND THE ARK OF THE COVENANT IS HIDDEN IN UGANDA

DUDE BOOOOM LMAO

DUDE KETTLEBELLS LITERALLY ENCRUSTED WITH WEED AND DUNKED IN MCT OIL AND THROWN OFF BUILDINGS FEAR FACTOR STYLE
>"BRENDAN SCHAUB JUST END IT ALL, I THINK YOU ARE A WORTHLESS FIGHTER AND I HATE YOU, BUT COME BACK ON THE PODCAST SO I CAN BLOW YOU THE FUCK OUT OF THE WATER AGAIN AND REDUCE YOU TO TEARS"
>"BRENDAN "FRASER" "FUCK MY SHIT UP" SCHAUB, JUST TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT. YOUR CAREER IS OVER. IT'S TIME FOR THE SMITH AND WESSON RETIREMENT PLAN"

- Joe Rogan, 2015

>YOU ARE NOW PICTURING JOE ROGAN NAKED IN A FLOTATION TANK WITH A MOUTH FULL OF POT BROWNIES TRIPPING

- Brought to you by SquareSpace©

cue the hempforce mustard

Enter the codename rogan and get 20% off your next fleshlight purchase.

Joe Rogan is fuckin badass'

eat shit faggots without alpha brain

sup Joe

perfect.

Can you imagine that? It's absolutely crazy.
It's actually unbelievable to think. Like really? Can you imagine that? It's absolutely crazy

This is actually a pretty perfect impersonation.

Why is Joe so obsessed with Chimpanzees?

"Rogan Mindset"

Joe Rogan is the "thinking" plebes man

Get him outta here

He's weird like that.

If you arent travelling into the heart of the Mojave to pick your wild ayahuasca then are you even really trying

wouldn't that be peyote? I heard ayahuasca comes from Brazil

everybody loves mindsets nowadays

fpbp