You wake up in a favela

>you wake up in a favela

What's your next move?

A bowel movement all over myself

Suicide by off duty cop

wonder that where all these big butted big boobed racemixed brazilian princesses are hiding

am i still a gringo or am i a favela monkey?

Light fires.

Work my way up to being one of the richest 1%

To see what organs i lost

what is life unironically like in a favela? can someone give me a wake-up to sleep average day in memearrows?

>work my way up
user by possessing what i assume is white skin you're already the richest in the favela.

snort coke
shoot cops
fuck bitches

>memearrows
YOU HAVE TO GO BACK
O
U

HAVE
A
V
E

TO
O

GO
O

BACK
A
C
K

Blend in

If it's anything like Modern Warfare 2, there are a bunch of hueyhueys constantly running around shooting everyone at all times.

>what is life unironically like in a favela?

snort coke
shoot cops
fuck bitches

Fuck wrong quote

Sudoku

Get chased then become the hulk

...

Your failing you Tropico 5 game bros. Build more houses and get your people to work.

this

Shit in the gutter, get stabbed and robbed while watching corpses float by in the trash filled river.

Another normal day in Niggerville.

...

that would actually be a really good movie, like they take this pathetic weak modern numale and drug him and then bring him to some third world shithole, leave him with no money or identification of any kind

If I woke up in a favela I'd do everything in my power to start a socialist movement where we became a self sustaining system that functioned illegally without the knowledge of the government and then leech as many resources as I could from the more developed portions of the country. Once we had enough people, supplies, weapons, and capital, we would then stage a civil uprising amongst the downtrodden, poor, and disgruntled in order to level out Brazil into a somewhat decent country for its citizens. Then as figurehead I'd try to nurture it towards a monarchy where I could become emperor. Then I would just do what Pedro did since he was on the right track.

None of this would probably work at all though, and desu I'd rather kill my self then even pretend to be a commie.

run

>build lots of commie blocks and even some nicer apartments
>people still choose to live in favelas in the middle of the forrest
>no longer feel bad demolishing them and being a dictator

youre acting like a gringo if you want out then you must think that your own people aren't good enough for you whitey. die with us or abandon your favela you can't help us you're acting too white

I can only go up from here.

>wake up
>put on shoes/kill the first person i see who has shoes
>start walking
>walk
>walk some more
>make it out of the favela
>walk
>keep walking
>walk some more
>through the city without stopping so I don't get killed by the police
>walk more
>keep going
>find the ocean or the jungle
>keep walking baby
>into the ocean or jungle
>die
sounds like a good day in the favela

>wake up at the sound of gunshots
>use your 2 years old toothbrush to brush teeth with brown water
>ingest fecal bacteria from water
>already high resistance to silly bacteria so no diarrhea to worry about
>look at your Lula poster and say your daily prayers to the communist godfather
>go outside
>step on a dirty water pond
>there's a huge human turd right next to it
>some random kid asks you for a penny and you tell him to fuck off
>he comes back with 10 friends and they start throwing things at you
>kick their asses
>they come back with their older brothers
>they kick your ass
>call the police
>they kick your ass while asking where are the drugs
>lose anal virginity to broomstick by interrogation
>walk down the favela to grab more water
>bucket doesn't have handles so you have to carry it on your head
>more shooting
>step on 3 different human feces on the way back
>watch the afternoon soap operas while counting all the 300 dilmas you got from leechbux
>kiss Great Leader Lula's poster
>scatter the cockroaches on your bed to make way for your smelly limbs
>put your flip flops away and scratch some of the dead skin on your feet
>"que orgulho de ser brasileiro :'^)"

Invent fire and become the local tribe's chieftain.

Fill bottles with water to sell them? I dunno

Try to survive while going to the airport to Europe.

>wake up sweating with the sun coming through the curtains hitting your face
>take a shit, throw the paper in the basket with shitted paper balls from days before
>take a quick bath in your electric shower praying you won't get electrified
>get down through narrow walks and stairs to the near bar owned by the local militia, buy some breakfast
>walk to the to the local lan-house, wave to the kids playing LoL with Ar-15 on their backs.
>get to your chair, google Sup Forums, starts posting huehueuhe

be killed by gang of miscreant children and eaten by wild dogs.
Dying happy because the kids got some playtime and the dogs full bellies for once.

this
topkek

Brutal.

enjoyed it, thanks

>Throw good clothes
>appear drunk
>throw one shoe and use just one
>get the fuck out while my cover is up

Leave. Go to the rainforest and purchase a jungle loli.

>not saying comedy chevrons

>have green eyes
>local tribes think you are a spirit/god
>use slavish obedience to become Kang
>Unify Favela
>black market weapons from Russia
>Throw coup and become first Kang of Brazil
>Declare Huempire of Brazil
>Use favela monkies in Paraguay and Argentina to throw coups
>unify three countires
>leave Uruguay alone, they're bros
>allow favela monkies to rape and pillage as much as they want
>southern cone of SA becomes war-torn chaos
>Increase takes to 90%
>give gibs to Uruguay
>they're bros
>more and more gibs to develop them
>Uruguay becomes Hyper-advanced superstate living in floating cities
>Uruguay takes pity on Favela mokies surrounding them and incinerates everything
>goes on to colonize the stars for eternity
>smile to myself as I forage for food in the ruins of Buenos Aires