"user... I know we've only been together a few months... but I have a surprise for you!"

>"user... I know we've only been together a few months... but I have a surprise for you!"
>"I'm pregnant! I'm very excited that I get to have your kid, you're the only person that I've had sex with in the last couple months"
>"user... what's wrong...?"
>"Why are you sweating profusely? Is there something wrong? You aren't thinking about abortion, right? You know since condoms were banned alongside contraception and I can't get an abortion because that was also banned, this baby is ours now."
>"If you don't want the kid, you're going to pay child support for it, and you won't have any custody then. You should have thought about this before you voted for Trump."
>"I'm gonna go fuck a couple niggers now and spend your child support money wildly. Be sure the payments are on time, or I will have you thrown in prison."

Well Sup Forums?

Other urls found in this thread:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coitus_interruptus
youtube.com/watch?v=7Wt--kZ8RcA
legalmatch.com/law-library/article/fathers-rights---effect-of-name-on-birth-certificate.html
twitter.com/AnonBabble

...

I'm sterile.

Literally. Like, I have medical documentation to prove it.

>being proud about being half a man

>implying anyone on Sup Forums has talked to a woman in the last year

Nothing's wrong babe, here, I made some Chamomile tea! Be sure to drink it all. ;)

Force her to get an abortion like I have every other woman that this has ever happened to.

>*NSA rubs their hands*

>Implying I wouldn't secretly test the kid after it was born to ensure u was the father
>Further implying that I wouldn't take care of my own kid
Get the fuck out of here nigger.

spotted the child-support-paying cuck

A paternity test and we'll see.

>ITT: lefties think of scenarios that'll never happen

>you're the only person that I've had sex with in the last couple months"
I think you have the wrong person, bye.

So far no americucks have stepped up to the plate, I'm impressed Taco poster.

seriously speaking that king of situations are hard to deal with.

guess the only true solution is to get better moral standarts for our citizen. let the chad screw themself by empregnating women and go get your qt white or asian female. no more than 2 or 3 parteners before depending on your age. but around 20 it should be good.

Think my bf is LARPing about being a woman.

;)

Why the fuck would condoms be banned? Either way, if they did I would only do oral stuff then.

#1 Buy a pregnancy tester and watch her piss on it to ensure she isn't lying
#2 Paternity test

Of course if you're married and planned to have a kid you can ignore #1.

>scenarios that happen on a regular basis never happen

Keep on thinking that cuckboi.

>having sex with a woman who is not your wife
absolutely degenerate

Condoms and Contraceptives aren't, and will never be banned you massive twat.

If your name is on the birth certificate, that literally does not matter. Additionally, if you let your girlfriend live with you or visit too frequently or do things like buy groceries and make dinner together, you are technically going to owe her alimony due to you two cohabiting for an extended period of time.

>hooking up with someone you don't plan to stay with
>not pulling out to prevent an unwanted pregnancy
>not putting it up for adoption
>fucking a coalburner
the mong deserves prison

I had mumps and measles something awful as a teenager. Zapped my balls.

It's a good thing I'm sterile then.

Sorry, that should read "A good thing I'm celibate then"

I would have no problem with this and wouldnt be sweating at all. in my view sex is marriage. if you have sex with someone I believe you are married to them in gods eyes. now if she went and fucked someone else that would certainly be grounds for a sinless divorce from her. but i certainly would be sweating profusely I would be more than happy with the news and wouldnt drive her out.. wtf is your problem?

Sorry to hear that my friend.

No you idiot. You being sterile literally doesn't matter unless you have the best lawyer on the book and you're willing and able to fight an extended court case not against your gf, but the state.

>She broke my heart
>So I broke her face

>Asking your fucking wife for a paternity test.
You know that trust is supposed to be a very important aspect of a marriage, right, you degenerate?

You do the gentlemanly thing and send a spit sample in behind her back.

>he thinks pulling out works
I take it you spend most of your time with 2d girls? Not surprised since all of your women want sand niggers anyways.

This is the only correct answer.

dude i know this idiot whos been fucking his girlfriend unprotected for five years with pulling out as his only solution


although tbqh, he could be infertile, he lives near a chemical plant

lol. no.

i want you to show me the statute anywhere in america that says the woman can just name anyone she wants as the father on the birth certificate and they are then legally the father and have no legal recourse.

You don't really understand the whole child support thing, do you?

i would rather give half my paycheck to my kid than go through life without reproducing. it's pretty much the point of our existence.
i thought you were just kidding, so now i feel bad. sorry about your testicles.

what part of his post had any pride in it???????????????????????

>"I'm gonna go fuck a couple niggers now and spend your child support money wildly. Be sure the payments are on time, or I will have you thrown in prison."
>implying there's niggers to fuck after trump is through with them

can you go to jail for not paying child support?

It actually has a surprisingly high effectiveness.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coitus_interruptus

Yes.
youtube.com/watch?v=7Wt--kZ8RcA

Hahaha, she has to agree. If you do one without her consent it will not be admitted in court. Welcome to the modern world cuck.

legalmatch.com/law-library/article/fathers-rights---effect-of-name-on-birth-certificate.html
And this is the least of your worries as a boyfriend is still entitled to paying alimony to his girlfriend if you are in cohabitation or a cohabitation like state in your relationship.

I would support any child that I actually was the biological father of.... if you wouldn't you are literally a nigger.

Now if she wanted a divorce anyway I would be against it and say as much at any hearing. I would be reasonable and respectful and make it known that i love my child and want only the best for it etc.

you people seem to think that courts are completley fucked or something. i know things generally dont go well for fathers but a lot of the time its due to them saying the wrong shit in the courtroom and making it seem like they want nothing to do with the child.

hell. if shes the one pushing for divorce and acting all crazy. and I am acting calm and rational i have no doubt i could get custody of the kids.

But it does........

The left tends to consider anything less than fully paid on demand taxpayer funded services (abortion, contraception, et al) to be a "ban".

>i thought you were just kidding, so now i feel bad. sorry about your testicles.
It's fine.

My genetics are horrible, anyways.

In all likelyhood, I'll just adopt.

>You know since condoms were banned alongside contraception
Retard

Why wouldn't I take responsibility?
Im not a nigger.

>god

Literally not an argument

>having sex outside of wedlock

Kick her in the stomach so hard that I'll get recruited for a German soccer team.

>You know since condoms were banned alongside contraception and I can't get an abortion because that was also banned, this baby is ours now."
All of these thing are legal though you fucking idiot.

Why would I ever be upset about increasing the white population?

...

>shooting blanks violating any virtus
Retard

There was an interesting case of an underage male who had been molested by an older woman a few years back. The woman gave birth to his child and he was ordered to pay child support and was threatened with jail time for not being able to pay (being a fucking kid and all).

I also remember reading of cases of NG soldiers who fell behind in child support during deployment (due to a decrease in pay) who received similar treatment.

You gotta sleep some time, sugar muffins

>4chans having sex
lol u 'aint from 'round here, are ya'?

I would love this scenario. No women I meet or hookup with ever want a family. If I found myself with a beautiful girl who I knocked up by me wanting to raise a family together I'd be ecstatic.

...

Is she white?

"If someone suspects that he is not the father of a child, the best way for him to avoid this is to refuse to put his name on the birth certificate, and to insist on a paternity test."

even in the article you are quoting it says it right there.

YOU have to put YOUR name on the birth certificate. she cant just arbitrarily add your name to it.

I mean if you have any doubt about the child's authenticity i would recommend this.

1. Order a home paternity test kit.
2. while the mother is away get some saliva from the child and from you as well and use the kit as directed.
3. mail it in and get the results.
4. if it comes back as not yours you say you want a legal paternity test to be done. DO NOT mention the fact that you did one yourself.
5. PROFIT.

you have a pretty long time to do this. even in that article it said you have a minumum of 2 years in most states. you could get that saliva test WAY before that. you could get it when the baby is one week old and drooling everywhere.

look im all for mens rights and shit but it just isnt that hard.

BUMP

Abortion is murder and genocide, only a cuck supports abortion. A proud Sup Forumstard will raise this nigger baby as his own

I can't wait to see this episode of divorce court.

>"user! No! That is illegal, that's it, I'm calling the police right now, you gonna spend a long time in prison for threatening an illegal abortion!"

People what's act like a baby tires down the man, like an anchor for the woman.
Frankly I want to get a girl pregnant. I see it as an anchor FOR ME. Then she has to talk to me. I'm so lonely.

Well, you cheating bitch, I had a vasectomy without your knowledge so you can fuck right off with that bullshit. Have fun begging for scraps and selling your used up pussy to feed your bastard child.

>tfw when a vet
>tfw just give her a mega dose of dexamethasone and prostaglandin

LOLing at your ignorance. Ive been through this shit, its a shit show, like literally there was no reason for me to even be there. They should have just sent me the decision in the mail, in fact I spent 2 years of constant court battles. And the only time the father ever got any real custody was when the mother was hardcore on drugs. Even then though, the mother would get more rights than the average father. Wrap it up user, you will never know a hell like the domestic court system.

Why haven't you impregnated a black woman, Sup Forums?

>assumes /pol can even get laid
>best larp today
>my sides

You will probably die lonely with this mindset.

>being proud about removing yourself from the gene pool

Fucking nu-males. It's better this way though.

Pretty sure a black woman wouldn't want me. Besides, I want a white woman.

I'm not mad that so many of you responded to this outrageously stupid thread, just disappointed. Remember, ironic shitposting is still shitposting.

She can still put your name as the father if you aren't present at the birth.
She can be quiet for two years.
She can sue for child support.
The state will back her because they would rather have you personally on the hook than have to distribute aid in the form of welfare and food stamps.
A paternity test will not save you if you've told her you're sterile and she knows how the law works. It would only save you if you did it immediately as soon as the child was born and forced your way into the doctors office to make sure she didn't wrote your name down as the father without you there.

If you find out your girlfriend is pregnant and leave immediately without following up at all and being present at the birth, and she has any knowledge of the law, you're in for a world of JUST, boyo.

>Ask for paternity test
>Ask for prenup

Are you guys literally virgins?

Trust is the single most important thing in a relationship, any woman (or man, I guess) would be super offended and angry if you said that, especially if they were innocent and loved you

>kissing your mom on the lips

>extramartial sex
Kill yourselves degenerates.

Getting the fuck over it would be the only option.

>having sex with / being with a woman that's anti-Trump or would ever consider fucking niggers
>implying we all have a problem with being a father

W E W
E
W

ayo hol up. waz you kangz?
brb spreading seed

Pull out? Fuck her in the arse? Always finish on her or in her mouth?

Whats wrong with you fucking tards?

"If you find out your girlfriend is pregnant and leave immediately without following up at all and being present at the birth"

what the fuck? why would I do that. lol. Am I a nigger?

you are trying to paint the most outrageous picture possible. Women are not evil vampires that want to destroy your life. I mean sure, some are, but if you are with one of them then that's your own damn fault. and still, you are describing like a one in a million nightmare scenario.

Also I suppose if you really did have some strange doubt you could do public record checks. I mean if you are listed as the father of a child im sure that goes into some sort of database you could check every so often to see if you have been listed as the father of some child.

>tfw liberals made it easier to kill a cheating white than to get a divorce

Absolutely this. They must never know.

Who the fuck are you and what are you doing in my house!?!?!

Kek Delivers.

She soon sleeps with the fishes. Satire, of course.

>"Why are you sweating profusely? Is there something wrong? You aren't thinking about abortion, right? You know since condoms were banned alongside contraception and I can't get an abortion because that was also banned, this baby is ours now."
Things that have never been even thought of except by delusional liberals.
While we're at it, she should reveal her feminine penis and explain that gender has nothing to do with pregnancy.

>You will probably die lonely with this mindset
I past the point of accepting this

Why even bother living?

>"user, stop playing games, it's time to grow up and get a job. Call of duty isn't going to pay this Child support"

You will be the first country nuked in the apocalypse to come.

Implying that in a world where the government has gone so far as to ban condoms, they would still leave women the sole gatekeepers of evidence in legal cases against them.
Or have legal rights in general.

Your delusions contradict even themselves.

How is this even allowed?

Is there anything in OP's premise that isn't fucking retarded?

I guess I just wouldn't put myself in that situation in the first place.

that's whats wrong with our society. people fucking, unprotected no less, when they barley even know or like each-other.

sex is meant for procreation at its foundation. so if you wouldn't be willing to have a child with this woman i have no idea why in the hell you are having sex with her in the first place.

also. why did you separate?

The assumption is that you would do that because you're sterile.
But if you do choose to continue to support your pregnant girlfriend who is not carrying your child through her pregnancy every step of the way and do things like visit, go to meetings/appointments together about the child, eat together and even still sleep together, guess what happens?

You get slapped with alimony for cohabitation and in some places they may even consider you to be the symbolic father for the child.

This is why you don't have sex with people you don't want a serious relationship with.

Only a weak man cannot deal with constant extreme sexual impulses. It makes you able to do incredible things.

Also genetic testing

That kid is probably 100 times better off with foster parents than with that mother.