This reminds me of that time my sister wanted to have practice sex to prepare for her date. She came home after school one day all flustered and said that her crush would only date her if they had sex after dinner. Mind you she was 16 and this dude was 19, while I myself was 11.
She told me to put on a suit, light up some candles on the dinner table and microwave a TV dinner. I didn't have a suit so I put on my dad's which was oversized, even if I was pretty big for my age and did as she asked. I love my sister so I didn't question much but when she wanted to practice kissing after eating I got a little nervous so I backed out a little. We ended up doing that thing the dogs did in Lady & the Tramp which made it a little less awkward
My sister had never had sex before, and obviously neither had I. She had no real formal sex education but had seen a porno flick after sneaking into the theater last year. I'm guessing that's where her knowledge came from because she had some pretty detailed requests, asking me to take off her bra and rub her breast, and in turn she would take off my pants and poke my weiner. We went to her bedroom and she gently tied me to the frame with her bra and took off her underwear. I didn't know what was going on and I didn't have any real sexual attraction to my sister but I got a slight chubby and she got on top of me and slid it in her vagina. She told me that she'd do all the work because I didn't know how and kinda started jumping up and down on my semi. This scared my penis a bit so it became flaccid and she was tired from all the movement so she kinda just laid on top of me with my penis in her for about thirty minutes before she told me to release. I thought she meant pee because I didn't know how to ejaculate yet so I peed inside her and then she cancelled her date because she thought sex was gross. The dude ended up having herpes so it was for the best. But in all seriousness, we can't let this guy get his hands on the nuclear codes.
>tfw you will get to see liberalism die forever
Feels good, guys.
This really made chemical compounds collide in my cranium
>he doesnt understand population density
I'm glad I read all of this.
This is all good until after a few more election cycles where the republicans lose the popular vote because of Cali/New York, then the electoral college becomes a permanent target of the media until they can find a way to get rid of it
OMG AMERICA IS SO RAYCISS
Are you arguing that the red areas in 2016 are significantly less dense now than what they were when they were blue in '96? Because unless that's what you're arguing you've basically completely missed the point the image is making
>he thinks 57 counties hold the entirety of the us population
I hope the left keeps doing insane shit so by 2020 the entire country will be red
The question is how do we shrink those blue areas even more?
Never though about it like this. Amazing.
Turn them into independent city-states and let them devour themselves.
Walls for everybody!
>I hope the left keeps doing insane shit
These people don't make compromises, they've already demonstrated that. The dem party will keep doing what they're doing, the dem voters will keep doing what they're doing and it will never stop until they grow too old to run around hitting good Samaritans with batons. This is what happens when you have a few minor victories and you assure yourself of total moral superiority and believe that whatever you say is absolute truth. They're not going to concede to us major modern issues like Islamic immigration because they believe with 100% certainty that they are in the right about it and they will not let it go. They have the same mentality towards ridiculously minor issues like trannies using women's restrooms
>never getting to have clumsy practice sex with your older sister
>why even live
You're digging your own grave.
Keep being reasonable and watch them self destruct, I guess
wew feeling hot and pissy
that really compelled me to contemplate
I am now a #cruzmissle
This shit is going to be so blue in 4 years, jesus christ
people are going to flood the polls like mad
Don't get cocky. In a few years it could start turning blue again. Especially if Trump does a bad job.
MFW Op is retarded and forgets that land =/= votes
reminds me of old Sup Forums
Urbanization and redistricting. How does it work?
>Dallas, Houston, San Diego, Cincinatti, Fairfax, Atlanta, Birmingham all went RED
It's cities vs everyone else now.
Really causes my neural cells to depolarize by opening gated channels in the membrane and passively diffusing potassium ions out of the cytoplasm down its concentration gradient leading to a sequence of action potentials to stimulate in accord with long term potentiation pathways developed through the release of serotonin at key moments of sensory input.
All that red. America's on its period.
neither party will ever jeopardize their electoral strongholds
you cant account for a straight popular vote in the current system
I enjoyed this
Libtards have a warped sense of reality what else is new. Popular vote is not electoral votes
The map posted makes the size of the state equivalent to the population, it's nothing about the electoral vote, it's about debunking the alt-chromosomes circle jerk that trump won by a landslide
Political polarisation between rural and urban concerns.
The Democrats have been going all-in on the urban and youth vote, while the Republicans went after the suburban and rural vote hard this cycle (and also in the last couple cycles, but Trump kicked it up a notch).
While the trend had been going on for a while, Clinton made it worse this time around by not even bothering to campaign in rural areas. Obama in 2008, meanwhile, made a point of going to lots of little towns in swing-states like Ohio, going to county fairs and shit and really trying to connect with the people (even if he didn't necessarily do a good job of that once in office).
That's when we take advantage of being eternally smug.
Consider your leet digits checked btw
My neurotransmitters were stimulated
it's not over till it's over
MFW you are retarded and nor realizing that the Electoral college skews in favor of land area.
>Cali 55 electoral votes
>Cali 25x pop of Idaho
>Cali 13.5x the electoral votes
Eat shit scrub learn how our government works, the larger the state population the more people there are per each electoral vote.
what goes on here in South Dakota
How do you redistrict Counties you fucking tard
Native American tribes. They vote overwhelmingly left.
>Native Americans voting overwhelming for a political party that supports larger government
w e w
Environmentalists are leftist, and Natives like not having their "sacred lands" disrupted, so they fall into a natural alliance. Big-government left administrations also have a way of getting in the way of private enterprise-based oil pipeline projects and the like which might spoil their land.
This is an quality post
We need a good nuking. That would permanently solve every problem.
what a meandering piece of shit story
thank you for writing the whole thing
Really gasts my flabber.
Keked hard and saved.
Was worth reading for the ending
Mitch Hedberg what are you doing
what about that bit in north dakota? is that just you leafs?
The north blue dot and south blue dot are highly Native American. The less-red section in the east of the state is Fargo, the capital of North Dakota, and its surroundings. Being more urbanised, it trends less conservative than demographically-similar less-urbanised regions.
I'm from north dakota originally, the south made sense, theres a res there. The bit in the very north though is what confuses me. It should be the county one more south if anything else was gonna flip blue.
According to this demographic info I'm looking at, the northernmost county, Rolette County, is 76% Native American. The weirdly-shaped dark-red one south/southwest of it, Pierce County, is 94% white, and the pale-red county next to that one which Trump only won by a hair, is 55.1% Native American.
And by the pale-red county, I mean Benson County.
audibly, but softly, keked
Yeah I was only up in rolette once to visit my grandma, makes sense, lots of natives up there. When they actually get houses and move off the res. The pale county I believe is a reservation, or maybe its directly next to one. I know the reservations in the more central part of the state tend to lean more conservative than most reservations though.
Also, I apologise - Fargo isn't your state capital, it's your largest city. Bismarck's your capital. My bad.
Yeah, minnewaukan, thats where the res is. Right on the edge of devils lake. I lived in Ramsey county for a few years. Fuck that shithole.
ah it doesn't matter. They all are tiny anyways. Even the "cities" aren't cities. Feels good
>tfw no sister to pee in
Ah. I've actually considered moving to the United States before, particularly to one of the flyover states, partly because they're so lightly populated (our home "city" is about one-fifth the size of Fargo, is hundreds of kilometres from any "real" urban centres, and our state is bigger than Alaska with the population of Louisiana). My fiancee particularly likes Wyoming partly because of its history on voter rights.
Got room for two libertarian-minded moderates with funny accents in those big ol' plains out there? If it helps, I like guns and recreationally shooting shit in a safe and lawful manner.
Wyoming has a surplus of room, dude. I think you'll be fine, people probably won't mind white Australians.
Good to know. Thanks.
Also, I meant "are you full" less in the literal sense and more in the "fuck off we're full" sense.
Commonwealth bros are best bros.
it feels nice to be back
Bismarck is the capital of North Dakota
t. North Dakotan
>we're a sovereign nation!
>pls let us vote
why the fuck can indians fucking vote
old school Sup Forums vibes from this post
Dole was one of the most boring and hopeless Repub candidates in recent history, going against incumbent Slick Willie.
Didn't even see it coming
The south voted blue because Clinton is a southerner like them.
The rural north voted Clinton because small businesses and white blue collar unionists still believed in Dems.
Dole took over much of the Great Plains being that he is from Kansas.
The west looks about the same in 20 years time.
Why is Hawaii always so blue
how could this have happened?
>current year -1
We're trying so hard to be California but senpai won't notice us
Please send help
Just wait till France's election it's gonna be even better.