If Trump is the best jobs president ever, then why can't I get a fucking job? I HAVE AN ENGINERS DEGREE FFS

If Trump is the best jobs president ever, then why can't I get a fucking job? I HAVE AN ENGINERS DEGREE FFS

Other urls found in this thread:

businessinsider.com/formatting-rules-to-get-your-resume-through-the-scanning-software-2013-2?IR=T
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

>2.5 GPA

Might be a problem with your resume m8

LOL!
Is this the document you send out to companies in hope of getting a job?

>putting 2.5 gpa on a fucking resume
You really should removeyourself from the genepool

Holy shit that's an awful resume. Is this a joke OP? Are you pulling a fast one on us?

>typos on resume
>hobbies: first one is gaming
>low GPa

>gpa is low but excellent communicator
So you can't follow instructions but a great bullshitter. I wonder where the problem could be

the issue is that you put "Pet Smart" when clearly the company's name is "Pet's Mart"

from the typos and weird capitalization it's obvious you're mildly retarded. why don't you put that on your resume for sympathy?

>I HAVE AN ENGINERS DEGREE FFS
no you don't
>saged

this thread again.
people still falling for the b8

>hobbies
Reading
>2.5 gpa
Kek this is great.

>job unrelated hobbies
> engineering degree, yet no proper layout (try using tex maybe)
>"GPa is low"
> Gaming as hobby
> Skills "Computer"
> exellent communicator - disproof: this CV

I don't know man, you tell me.

>2.5 in Civil
oh

>work life
I think you mean Work Lyfe

>learned to feed animals
You scooped food into a bowl?

I'm stopping here. This is the shittiest resume I've ever seen, and I worked for a recruiter for a year.

Learn how to make a resume you fucking idiot.

>excellent communicator

Indeed, you're communicating why people shouldn't hire you quite well!

Top tier b8

that resume is dogshit. it literally seems like you have a learning disability just by looking at it.

i mean you put work life? thats a terrible way to phrase it put like employment history or something (sound like an adult)

you call pets mart pet smart? like wtf you can't even name your employer properly? your stuff isnt a complete sentence it doesnt describe anything. i mean if this is not trolling like you genuinely are serious with this then kys because this resume is fucking garbage and makes you look liek a retard - not good considering you're applying to engineering jobs that hire basically on merit of intelligence.

That resume looks like I fucking took a shit on it and if you don't reply to this post your mother will die in her sleep tonight

you seem really autistic

>Hobbies: Gaming
End your own suffering. It's the humane thing to do.

>2.5 GPA
>GPa is low but excellent
>Anime debate club member
>Gaming

10/10 would hire into management

Lol. Not even updated and I'm sure I could work on mine.

Well I hope that's a bait resume. Don't put your gpa on your resume unless its very good, obviously.

You have autism

>Fired from PetSmart for relationships with customers

I'll bet this autistic motherfucker is from Oregon

Perfect! That's what I aim for! If the employer thinks I'm autistic I can get on board.

>Hobbies
>Family and friends

LAWDY LAWD I AM LUVVING THAT B8M8IR88/8NOH8

>falling for the job meme

What university, OP?

>no real extracurricular activities
>no projects
>no work in an engineering research lab or lab where civil is applicable at your university

>>adv

not politics related in any fucking way

Puting "le trumpf" into your thread text doesnt make it Sup Forums related fucktard

sage and report

That is legitimately one of the shittiest resumes I have ever seen, and I used to help my dad pick out who he interviewed.

>2.5 GPA
Why would you even include that? I don't include mine and I had a 3.93.

>GPa
No wonder you got a 2.5, you don't even know how to capitalize

>WORK LIFE
First, three of your headers are all caps, the others are better and "correct" The phrase "work life" itself should be changed to experience, this is your fucking instagram

>No goals section

>Punctuation is inconsistent

>Work experience includes no start/end dates and overly broad job duties

>Only two previous jobs
Volunteering with your city/state/local non-profit will help. Lots of non-profits need help for simple things and it would look good

>Gaming is included in your hobbies

And you fucking wonder why you don't have a job. Go whine on Tumblr, they're in your intelligence level.

unfounded claim. you have parkinson's

learn how to do Resumes you fag
pic related the perfect CV

>kappa eta kappa

>mfw when i was like it's not really Pets Mart, is it?
>mfw i looked it up. PetSmart (with those caps)
>mfw words on sign are always red:Pet blue:Smart
>mfw when it really is Pet Smart.

Your resume is dogshit.
Dont blame Trump lmao

This is a horrible resume. I would assume you're a nerd that spends too much time reading bullshit online.

Your resume is the problem.
This is how you must do a resume today

Your resume is absolute shit. My 10 year old son could write a better fucking resume than that.

>Hurr durr, why can't I find a job?

Your resume is shit. I hire people in your field and I'd throw your resume in the trash.

1) "GPa is low but excellent communicator"
WTF Is this? It's GPA, not GPa. Secondly, education goes at the bottom. Work experience goes at the top. Your GPA is low so just keep it off of your resume. If you get asked your GPA, just say it was a 3.0. I never check GPA's and I highly doubt any employer will.

2) "Work Life"
WTF IS THIS??? I'm starting to think you're just trolling us. It is "Work Experience", not work life lol. Your job descriptions are too vague. You should have at least 4-5 bullet points MINIMUM describing what you did at those jobs.

3) Skills is fine, although you should elaborate more on them. I see you're skilled in computers, but how so? I can type on a fucking keyboard and use a mouse and browse facebook, does that mean I'm skilled in computers too?

4) "Extracurriculurs"
Take that the fuck off of your resume. I don't want anyone that was in a fucking debate club working for me. I'm not employing you to debate, I'm employing you to make me money, bitch.

5) "Hobbies"
Take that off. You're legit describing yourself as a NEET and I think it's hilarious but take it off. Do you fuck your family and friends? WHY IS THAT A HOBBY? Take hobbies off of your shit.

bait

>I HAVE AN ENGINERS DEGREE FFS
What kind of engineer are you?

This might be the worst resume i've ever read.

I hate MLP motherfuckers but I'd actually interview him and grill the shit out of him. If he didn't crack in my interview, and if he didn't turn out to be an SJW. I'd hire the fuck out of him. That took fucking effort A++++

wew

Finally someone gets it.

Nice, that's what I want people to think.

I saw this exact same thread with the exact same 'resume' already last year.

Can autistic people realise they're autistic? This shit is too obvious.

GPA is more an indicator of autism than anything else.

what the actual fuck user.

If I were a hiring manager and came across this resume I would call you in for 4 interviews and not hire you.

My 7th grade education hillbilly father managed to shit out a better resume than this.

7/10 if bait

>ENGINERS

please tell me this resume is fake.

>hilariously bad resume
>1 post by this ID

I was thinking of taking my GPA off my resume as well. Probably good due to possible drops in gpa pretty soon...

Your resume sucks nigger balls.

Got me with the bait, now get out.

what is wrong with that resume? not enough retarded buzzwords?

>mexican intellectuals

>tfw my GPA is lower than OPs because my professors fucked me on my last year of uni

Goddamn kikes, I swear somehow they found out I was redpilled and started sabotaging me.

>goals section

into le trash it goes

i have two dads

Nice repost bro, someone posted this shit a month ago.
I gotta give you 8/10 bait just because so many people fell for it. Otherwise 7/10

If you're as smart as that fucker, resume doesn't matter. Vim is a questionable editor choice tho, Emacs is for the true elite.

fuck off, NEET

Need to work on that cv bro.
>too much spacing
>font too big
Your shit needs to go all on one page. Interviewers, recruiters, contractors, head hunters, etc, don't actually read the whole damn thing. Most of them use software to scan the hundreds of CVs they get and the CVs that best matches the search criteria break through.

businessinsider.com/formatting-rules-to-get-your-resume-through-the-scanning-software-2013-2?IR=T

Get cracking, faggot.

>putting this much time in responding to a bait thread

lurk more, newfag.

>2.5 gpa
>civil engineer
There's your problem Op
Am a 3.7 gpa electrical engineer and found a job easily, but I guess you have better communication skills
Also life isn't like high school debate team, your feelings will be hurt and useless shit won't be gratified. find a vacuum work towards it.

I read this as

>I'm a tech slave who is an egotistical meddler and expects a obscene salary

also

>includes fraternity

you might as well write "alcoholic" on your resume.

Piss poor resume for one thing
Another is you have never worked an actual computer engineering job not even an internship showing that you are even slightly competent.
Third is you picked a shit career and degree sure it's in demand but their is also a massive amount turn out of engineering grads and undergrads each year.
So yeah welcome to the real world faggot where job competition is a thing

Because you can't write a resume for shit. Hell you can barely write an image board post.

Because you are an idiot
That's a shit resume
And this is copy pasta

...

You end up making that project friendo? Would like to see

This resume looks like a middleschool student typed it.

Mush wagie, mush. My Hot Pockets, Mountain Dew, and high speed internet are not paying for themselves.

>people still falling for this b8

Behave user.

you faggot someone already posted the uncensored version of the resume, there's no point in posting it censored, Joseph Redmon is a FAG

>all these people taking this bait seriously

you seem butthurt

good b8 m8

7/10
If aiming for a middle to low tire programming job I would suggest picking up Python as well just as a small booster but you can get by on C and Java most of the time

whos that?

darude sandstorm

I could swear this exact thread and same resume were posted 2 months ago. haven't made any progress or is this some kind of ruse?

shut the fuck up

And here we have a drain on the economy called a nigger don't worry folks they will be a thing of the past soon

I am, but you have to be to put yourself in the mind of a manager. They're going to be hyper critical of every little thing that might be a red flag.

Sage for fucks sake I'm hardly on here and have seen this 10 times

>1 post by this ID

Bump.

Candace Cameron-Bure

(yes, she does porn)

>>.5 GPA
Don't blame successful people for your stupidity. Stupid enough to get loans to take classes that you apparently didn't give a shit about.

This is my first time on Sup Forums and I've seen this 200 times

I'm gay and have aids and have autism btw

how old are you

>Skills
>Excel, microsoft office

LEL

Get a job as a technician at an engineering firm and work your way up.