If trump is jobs president why cant i find a fucking job even with an engineering degree?

if trump is jobs president why cant i find a fucking job even with an engineering degree?

Is Trump supposed to help you find a job in New Zealand, or did you forget your proxy, shill?

You got too many chinks in your country dude.

Because you can't write a resume for shit.

well he certainly isnt helping me find a job by pulling out of tpp

Your resume looks like it was written by an autistic 10 yr old. But then again you have a civil engineering degree with a 2.5 gpa

Sup Forums we have spooks among us.

your resume gave me cancer

Are you a good communicator?

Call me optimistic, but I think
>thatsthejoke.jpg
Not his resume.

whats wrong with it?

yes

After seeing this retards CV it's no wonder a have always got called in for a interview after sending in my CV. I didn't realise how fucking retarded most people were when making their CV.

...I mean who the fuck puts their GPA, then points out its low. Who makes a CV that barren and sterile of personality. Who the fuck lists their hobbies with bullet points and puts "gaming", might as well put anime and shitposting on Sup Forums while you're at it.

The autism is real

Holy shit you weren't joking

TOPKEK the average drumpfkin. So that's where the unemployment rate is coming from, the luddites were wrong this whole time

TOP

KEK

What field are you employed in, newfriend?

Soon there will be plenty of available jobs for you in Silicon Vally

I have fuckin no skills and my resume is longer than that LOL

Why have you not learned to embellish, silly cyka

I'm assuming this is a troll thread, but damn that's a shit resume.
>easiest engr degree
>2.5 GPA
>actually listing that on your resume
>all that empty space
>horrid lack of content
>skills: computers
ayy lmao you will literally never get a professional job with that piece of toilet paper

im not a drumpfkin at all im saying he was supposed to be jobs president "theyll call me the jobs president" i think he said exactly that but still no jobs

When it collapses?

America first, kiwi fucker.

Your resume is garbage. I'd fire you from being a NEET if i could. Get out of my office

Your pasta has mold on it.

Let me guess, your a millennial! No trophies in real life.

How old are you? Your CV is literally empty-tier

You fucking CV is cancer

well what would you fucking suggest then?

Because you're from NZ, you dumb faggot.

That's a shitty CV mate

It's only 77 days in dumbfucks

>little job experience
>meme tier hobbies
>not referencing jobs/education in time
>low gpa
>skill section shows you really cant do shit beside using common softwares
Would throw in trash

This is the worst fucking CV I have ever read.

It must be bait and I have fallen for it.

Thats the joke stupid

It's hard to tell, your skills section could use some more words, it should definitely be longer than your hobbies section

get rid of this part, you have in skills that you are excellent communicator and it's bad to point out you have low GPa especially at the top of CV
>GPa is low but excellent communicator

for the skills part, just writing computers of too simplistic imho, I know CV should be bloated with bullshit but still.

you should also consider trainee programs, they are great I you can't find job due to no experience in you expertise

'skills:

computers'

FOR FUCK'S SAKE user

This thread is to detect all of the newfags, this shit is at least a few months old minimum.

Because there are not jobs for engineers in Hobbiton.

put dates on your tenure at each work place
put dates on your university career
put under education what your course comprised of
put under each job skills you learned (3-4 for each)
"excellent communicator" needs to be stated 1 time at most
Put in skills an example of when you worked in a team and what you did
'family and friends' is not a hobby

This is probably bait, but okay.

For starters, why would you write that your GPA was low? In what possible way could pointing that out benefit you?

Also, "computers" aren't a skill. Be specific. In addition, Microsoft Office should be capitalized.

You've written "excellent communicator" twice. Which is not something an excellenet communicator would do.

"Family and friends" is not a hobby.

Dates. Provide timeframes for all this shit.

>Not in the US
>No relevant job experience, also post job contact info, like address(get permission from old boss first so they know what is going on).
>Almost every skill listed is so common that almost every applicant has them, especially in Engineering.
>No useful extracurricular or hobby for jobs
>family and friends are not hobbies, makes you sound desperate
>Low GPA
>Also use a smaller font. It makes it look like you are intentionally fillaring

Here is a few pointers to start with.

am I supposed to lie and tell them my gpa is high?

idk how to be more specific about computers its not like im a fucking programmer or something im just good with computers

>saying something twice is not good communication
okay faggot

i always was told dont put references in your cv they wull ask for them and of course i am filling it by using a larger font what am I supposed to make it small and make it look fucking empty?

New Zealand loli

Rate me, m8s.

/thread

All up it's 6 years of experience btw. I blacked out the dates. 5 at maccas and 1 elsewhere.

Yep, it's bait.

i dont see how this is much better than mine like you say you have a wide range of computer experience and then just say excel and word

you worked at mcdonalds for 5 years and saved some lettuce wow good job

Is this b8?

In my CV I go into my experience with Photoshop and GML coding (note: I don't mention that it's fucking gamemaker, I call it the GML coding language). You're right though, it should also be in the resume.

That key strengths section is pretty garbage mate. Replace it with some project experience preferably your senior project

Don't write "excellent communicator" and then immediately disprove that statement with the rest of your CV

>listing hobbies on resume
>those skills
>no internships

Because we're putting America first kiwi
Also, employers can smell your autism.

>project experience preferably your senior project
What the fuck is a senior project?

>putting gaming on your resume

unless you were coaching a major esport team why the fuck would you put that there

Change "phone communication" skills to "communications skills".

>That shit GPA
>That shit job experience
>That shit skill set
>Putting hobbies on a resume
Start by fixing up your god awful resume

because its one of my hobbies? I didn't realize I have to coach the fucking yankees to love baseball

Nah the role description for the job I wrote that resume for was heavy on the "good phone communication skills" part. If I took it out there I'd have to put it back in somewhere else.

FAMILY AND FRIENDS

I hire ppl all the time for my department. That resume is just terrible. It would go into the trash along with 90% of the shit ones I come across. Seriously, if you want a job so badly, just try a little harder to make the first thing an employer sees somewhat captivating

>no large scale project done in your senior year to simulate what industry is like

Wtf did you even do at school?

Put down some class projects where you worked as a team. The projects need to be relatable to the job your applying for

Not that bad. I'd list the programs and software you have used.

I got another idea, write there that you are trans female that identifies as black lesbian, with affirmitive action ruining evrything for white males you should get job easily

>Who the fuck lists their hobbies with bullet points and puts "gaming", might as well put anime and shitposting on Sup Forums while you're at it.

thos

>Not putting hobbies on cv

Employers want people who wont fuck up the work dynamic so knowing what your hobbies are is a good way of knowing how you'll get on with our current employees. It's important.

>>no large scale project done in your senior year to simulate what industry is like
Do you guys actually do that in America?

Weird.

>Wtf did you even do at school?
Tried to get a good placement score to get me into Uni while working part time.

>Put down some class projects where you worked as a team
Literally none. Basically all the assessment is individual. Plus, High School is 5 years ago for me now. I don't think they care.

When I applied for Maccas I had a lot more about what I did at school but I've stripped it off to replace it with Uni and my other jobs and experience.

Yeah, my bad. Other user pointed it out. They only really care about Microsoft Office (it was in the role description like four times) but I did include more detail in my CV.

>mfw my resume literally just reads "FUCK YOU" in large letters.

This is one of the WORST resumes I have ever seen

>resume: +100pts
>using Word: -5 pts (use latex, or make it look at least nice).
>listing irrelevant hobbies: -30pts (3*10pts)
I don't care about your personal life, unless it means potential innovation (yes, I'll split the patent royalties with you, if you let my lawyers handle the application process - no, I won't take royalties out of your pension).

>listing irrelevant experience: -20pts (2*10pts)
I don't care about retail when I need CAD skills

>listing vague skill set: -10pts
Executives can porn, too.

>2.5 GPA
School is worthess. A low GPA is even worse - can you not into adult kindergarten?

If you have a low GPA, and are a whiteboi, I understand. Just have some examples ready.

We have thousands of applicants lined up, hundreds of contracts needing to be fulfilled in a timely manner, and I don't want to waste an hour talking to someone whose only skill set is playing WoW and shitposting.

if bait is bait bait then why can't i bait a bait bait bait even with bait mate

Go on this thing called Google and type I resume examples for whatever field you're in.

You're literally sitting in front of an omnipotent device and instead you just stuff your thumb up your ass and ask an Indochina Anime board

What the fuck are you doing nigger?

>they literally say list your hobbies/interest
>dont lie about your grades

This fucking thread again

I'm getting ready for work, the one thing you wished you were doing judging from this thread

Dude, resume are supposed to be enthousiastic and make the boss want to recruit you.

Your one-liners make it looks like a creepy speed-date.

>and I don't want to waste an hour talking to someone whose only skill set is playing WoW and shitposting.

yeah you are probably right, you have to look in a mirror twice a day and are already feed up with what you see

>all these newfags ITT who dont recognize the resume
lurk more redditards

Don't lie about your grades means give the GPA. It doesn't mean write "Bad GPA, but..."
Your GPA is bad without you pointing it out. Don't draw even more attention to that fact.

Protip: If your gpa is shit don't include it.

I recently got a job as a software engineer at a great company as a result of a polished resume/cover letter, and a good interview. They never asked for a gpa/transcript.

Damn straight.

I earn my time, and have every goddamn right to piss it away.

Delegation mufugga.

>2.5 GPA
>he expects to get a job with such a grade.

> 2.5 gpa
> literally cant go lower and graduate
> engineering, CIVIL engineering, the lowest level of stem
> barely better than a degree in 18th century franco-prussian pottery
> excellent communicator
> chatting up roasties in a dive outside canberra is not a skill one wants in an engineer.

go back to school, this time apply yourself like a white man, and get a degree thats worth a squirt of cold piss

this looks like those intentionally shitty resumes that people sent just so they can continue to stay home

gotta be a troll, but i'm still going to respond because someone out there might just really be sending out this CV.

>don't be apologetic for your grades. Certainly don't be apologetic by claiming you make up for it by distracting everybody in the office.
>be specific about your skills and how you have acquired and/or applied them
>unless you're doing something with it, it is not a hobby but a dull-minded timesink. In this example in particular:
>Gaming - are you competing, managing a team, community or competition?
>Politics - keep them to yourself, unless the job is related to your political views
>Family and Friends - unless you're running a social engineering experiment, or building a human centipede, those are not your hobby. In the other case, you don't want to mention this unless job is related.
>generally your hobbies, if you want to mention them, should be harmless and self-improving/highlighting your personal qualities. Learn music, have programming projects, recreate historic (mentioned in reading) buildings in toothpick scale models...

and if you havn't done shit in your life related to your studies, you'll probably want to get at least one (if renowned employer) internship under your belt. Don't be a miserable wretch there, either - your internship may turn into employment. It doesn't need to be your final job, but just like girls it's far easier to upgrade than start at the top.

Your resume looks like shit. I would recommend not being a retard when writing it out.

Your resume is better than mine

Is this a meme?

>apologizing for irrelevant GPA in college that nobody knows nor cares about
>doesn't go into detail for any skills
>lists gaming, family, friends, and politics as hobbies (utterly irrelevant to job skills)

You're a fucking moron, OP. Learn how to write a resume and then get back to us.

people still falls for this shit

No it's not you numbnuts. Employers don't give a shit about your hobbies, unless they will actually impact productivity positively. And even then, you shouldn't call them hobbies, you should count them as 'skills', and translate them into manager-speak.

his cv IS better than yours.

from it i know that he is
> reliable
mcdonalds is a shitshow, if he can/will hang on for 5 grueling years there, i can treat him little better than a slave and he will thank me for it

> actually DID shit other than burger flippin
saving lettuce aint much, but its SOMETHING, was trusted enough by his McManager to train the other peons to flip burgers and listen for the fryer beeping
> actually dealt with the gutter level slime that goes to mcdonalds on the regular, without shooting any of them, or himself
i stop in there once or twice a month to satisfy my cravings for fries, and invariably something retard is going on.
example: fat sheboon in worn out pyjama pants, a stained (jizz?) tube top and shower shoes screaming about "how i finna feed muh babbies if you aint take deez foo stampz !!!"

or alternately:
irate pavement ape demanding free shit cuz " you aint make muh shit what i want nigga!!!" even though i heard this coon order and he said nothing about his disdain for lettuce and onions...

every fucking time.
in every fucking mcdonalds, anywhere in the us.

5 years in mcdonalds is an acheivement.
8/10, would hire.

no way thats a real resume

its a terrible shitposting joke
besides, OP would be able to get a job in the U.S. if he wasn't an illegal who overstayed his H1B visa

Fuck off spamming your roleplay thread in every other thread. Goddamn.

>>>/reddit/

God fucking damn, look at these fucking newfags falling for this pasta thread bait thread

>Skills: COMPOOTERS

Serious question, whats wrong with kiwis? Ive not seen a single kiwi on Sup Forums that isnt either gay or retarded. Whats up with that?

You could've as well thrown it in the garbage bin, this is too minimalistic and doesn't tell shit about you.

What's this guy's endgame?
>2.5 GPA

Also, posting this garbage everyday. I miss the old christcuck posts. Low energy garbage.

Come here :^)