Wake Up

>Wake Up
>You are in Hernán Cortez ship about to reach the Mexican coast

What do?

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probably kill myself because I can't speak spanish

Turn back

lube up my dick in preparation for the violent rapings of natives to make future mexicans

Give everyone the spooks because I'm fucking brown
Probably get chained

/thread

They made a terrible mistake letting me on board.

Go on a raping spree.

Create a successful colony.

no you don't
Isabel la Católica fue la primera persona que se preocupó por los derechos de los indios: determinó que seguirían siendo los propietarios de las tierras que les pertenecían con anterioridad a la llegada de los españoles y, en el año 1500, dictó un decreto que prohibió la esclavitud. Nace así un nuevo derecho que, en palabras del autor, «reconoce que las libertades de los hombres y de los pueblos son algo inherente a ellos mismos, y que por tanto, les pertenecen por encima de las consideraciones de cualquier príncipe o Papa». Aquellas normas supusieron el punto de partida de la Leyes de Indias.

Fire grapeshot to slow the fleets down, chain shot to rip the masts apart and then fire mortars and cannon barrage.

Simple enough, why?

Say hi to my ancestor that served on his crew.

also just 7 years before Cortez
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laws_of_Burgos

>He thinks people gave a fuck about laws in the colonies

HAHAHAHAHA!

Ask for directions to México-Tenochtitlan.

Bueno, los espuñetas se limpiaron las manos. Por eso ahora todos ellos son desempleados lel

jizz in my pants

Genocide the natives.

Put on my rape shoes

enslave indians was illegal that's why we and the Portugueses put there a gorillion niggas to work as slaves

Convince the captain to sail to the south and invade Las Malvinas instead.

sabotage everything and sacrifice my life to ensure the fleet never makes it so that spics may never exist

>what do

research ballistics and place two-handed swordsmen ahead of my conquistadors

>What do?

Land and build a wall.

Conquer

Aim the canons at the other ships and blow them out of the water
Then turn them on myself

Prepare to rape my friend

Remove Spaniards 49 years early

>tfw Iberics blackened the Americas

Uh...does anyone speak English?

Not that much in Mexico, but just look at Cuba, La Española or Colombia

>draws steam engine
>dies from disease 1 week later

politely ask for a ride south since I got on the wrong ship

probably get executed as a french/english spy because yo speako little spanisho

Rape native boys

It's nice to see the mother country and her bastard child talking

underrated

Hernán Cortés probably spoke English and French since he was from an old money family

Of course the person who would lead a major expedition to a new continent would be able to speak french/english

>16th century myspace angle

My ancestor

This

Hernán Cortés de Monroy y Pizarro Altamirano, Marquis of the Valley of Oaxaca

Hernán Cortés de Monroy y Pizarro Altamirano, Marquis of the Valley of Oaxaca

Hernán Cortés de Monroy y Pizarro Altamirano, Marquis of the Valley of Oaxaca

Hernán Cortés de Monroy y Pizarro Altamirano, Marquis of the Valley of Oaxaca

Hernán Cortés de Monroy y Pizarro Altamirano, Marquis of the Valley of Oaxaca

>uuhhh, mi espanol no good, habla Inglés? Anyone?

I prepare to save their souls while I exchange their gold for little mirrors.

Catch a disease and die before making it to shore.

Sit back and watch history as it happens. It would make a hell of a story.

Hello Iberian tribe bruder gross Madrid when?

Maybe from the comfiness of a cloaked UFO. But no fucking way would i want to be a part of La Noche Triste or the week of sleepless fighting retreat afterwards. The expedition lasted more than two years and consisted of 100+ intense melee battles and most of the original crew was killed. the survivors who made it to the end got fucked out of booty by the officers. No thanks.

Strap on GoPro for POV pillaging

Shave, also stop using faceapp to cover up your likely horrible skin.
Just wash yourself. Go ask /fit/

colonise

Prepare the rape the local qts

Seriously tho anybody interested in this should read The True History of the Conquest of New Spain by Bernal Díaz del Castillo.

He was there and wrote about the whole thing later in life. It's seriously one of the best stories of soldiering ever written and insanely interesting.

Don Quixote is #1 book in world too

Broofs

>Wake Up
>What do?
say morning prayer of course, you infidel

...

no is not
1.-The Bible
2.-Quotes from Chairman Mao
3.-The Koran
4.-Poems by President Mao
5.-Don Quijote of La Mancha

B-but cubans are white, there is a balsero here that keeps calling me a piece of shit mestizo and says that cuba is white.

Friendly reminder that murica is Mexican clay faggot.

Don quixiote is number 1 actual book.

Come ashore
Hire natives
Align them on your side
Use hired natives to negotiate with local tribes
Kill as many tribes and locals as you can.
Aztec empire welcomes you.
You kill them.
You kill anyone opposes you.
Burn all the Codexes you can find.
Build churches over amazing architecture.
Traitors to their people continue to sell them out.
Blame gringos for all your cultural problems.

Cough on a blanket accidentally before presenting it as a gift to the locals.

>actual book
is number 1 novel

>2.-Quotes from Chairman Mao
That's because every one of the 1.5 billion chinks have to read that nonsense tio.

I traced my family 17 generations back to Juan López de Jimena, who fought in Tenochtitlán with Cortez. feelsgood.

my number one priority would be to learn Spanish

with french you would be ok too, also latin

Turn 360 degrees and go back to sleep

Bad choice. You could still get a lot of rape in just by nodding and doing what everyone else is doing.

Why would there be raping, spaniards have time equivelant ferraris.

> having that much daddy issues

Rejoice in the fact that I'm taking part in one of the greatest clashes of civilization ever, as well as one of the greatest adventures of all time. If only mexibro, I'd be the first founding father of you mestizos

Maybe native women were whires bowing to superior conquerors, ea malinche.

Shit on some blankets.

>implying there wasn't already
They had been at sea for months, of fucking course there was shit and whatnot on the blankets.

Should all Latin America unite with Spain, I think yes.

>implying we want those liberal faggots from madrid
Fuck that shit mang, we have plenty of shit to deal with here and we're full as fuck too.

call dibs on the americas

Kek

>They had been at sea for months, of fucking course there was shit and whatnot on the blankets.
Is that some Mexican maritime tradition or something?

THIS
and the niggers were already bought as slaves from other niggers

Not really but those voyages were pretty fucking long.

It must have been one of, if not THE most epic things ever done.

Just imagine beeing a poor peasant boy from Castille and having to witness the great city of Tenochtitlan full of gold, jewels, and strange people.

All the colors, all the new forms of the buildings, the clothing of the people.

Jus to destroy it all a couple of weeks after in brutal battle.

si si

Probably kill'em all because no one speaks Russian!

Time for some mutiny

Die because theyre ridden with diseases i haven't been exposed to

kill a bunch of savages and create the mexican race by fucking their women

>t. Eternal Anglo

oil my dick

1. Stay with the ships until Cortes and his posse have left.
2. Grab a ship, some crew and supplies and head south to present day Argentina, Buenos Aires.
3. Set up myself as a dictator.
4. Begin weapons development & military armament industry in preparation of future Spanish/Portuguese invasion.
5. Mass army of locals to conquer all of South America.
6. Profit.

I got half way through this post before I realized he wasn't just giving all of Isabel's names.

i was obsessed with this shit as a kid. it would've been the greatest thrill to sack the aztec empire. imagine slaughtering their proudest and most skilled warriors, the loot, the rape, the absolute destruction wrought on that proud city!

i'd have given anything to be there.

Poor Bernal was a little jealous that Cortes not only got to fuck all the prime native qts (Malinche, Isabel, etc), but also hoarded all the glory when the got back to Spain.

Seriously though, his book was super interesting. His writing really conveyed what it was like to be in a totally alien world, which is really hard to imagine these days.

Buy bitcoin.

Puke, I always get sea-sick.

Rule the waves.

Probably just chill and try not to say anything so they don't realize I don't belong there

d