The world has ended. You flee to the woods. what do you do now?

The world has ended. You flee to the woods. what do you do now?

drink my own piss

wait I didnt even buy my starting equipment

Go make myself a fish finger sandwich and eat it.

>build shelter
>gather supply's
>begin development

check reddit for dank memes then shitpost on Sup Forums

acquire delicious free range chicken tendies

Mate with animals

Is Mac Demarco really mainsteam now?

I attacking the user below me with my crossbow.

Let's knucle fight, you fucking amerifat. It would be the chance to lose couple pounds

yes

I roll my own dice and I hit you in the lungs. I not cheating don't worry

You're probably a sack of rolls you wop piece of shit.

Go hunting for fresh water with my doggo

Secure a perimeter, build traps, build an up-tree bed, go to sleep

Pick all the fucking psychedelic mushrooms I want.

Pelt them at cops.

jerk it

W-where can I learn to innawoods?

Dig trench
live like ant

furiously

get a big ass bag of rusty bolts

This is the correct answer.

Shit in the rivers

flee the woods

Jerk off with sharpie in pooper once moment of clarity assess situation and make further plans as situation dictates

wait till dark, go to bass pro shop, gets guns n shit, live there for a while, idk after that

...

Try to find pussy

I do *autistic screeching*

lol

Rape.

I think the obvious answer here is break out the mobile and check if Sup Forums is still online.

watch anime and then

I WUZ A KANG

Raid abandoned houses for makeup and razors and set a woman trap

Start the biggest marijuana growing operation in the history of the world

Count the leaves

Pop my tent, eat some sustenance, listen for news on the radio while I get ready to hunt small game. I'd probably start by surveying the area while I collected dry wood to keep at my camp. I'd collect brush to lay over my tent so it's not visible at a distance.

You need shelter, water, food. In that order. That's your first concern. Make a place to stay warm and dry. A place you can rest comfortably so you can be ready for the next day. You need a reliable source of clean water - preferably from a moving source like a stream, creek, or river. You need something you can boil water in, too. You can filter water through sand, rocks, and moss. And food is going to start bothering you very quickly. Most of us don't know what it's like to go 2 days without food. It's fucking terrible.

Food is going to be unreliable at best. Right off the bat you're probably going to be shooting at small game like squirrels, crows, and if you're lucky, a rabbit or grouse.

If you manage to kill something, you better know how to clean it and cook it. Skinning isn't as easy as you might think. If you foul the meat while gutting it, you better hope you can find something else to kill before you starve. If you puncture the intestines, just toss that shit out.

You're going to get eaten alive by mosquitos. Your'e going to be achy, dazed, and unhappy as fuck. You should probably be scared shitless too. It's going to be an awful life for a long, long time.

When you have time, chop down trees of similar thickness. Start cutting grooves into them and start making a lincoln log house. It'll take weeks to finish, but you should work your way up to permanent housing slowly. Man, there's so much shit to think about... sorry I love to speculate on this stuff.

Gayyyyyyyyyyyy

:( damn dude, that took at least 4 minutes to type.

guess who's gonna die in 5 minutes after a distaster... Yup, britbong, that'd be you.

continue...

he's right, retard.

Okay, my next thought would be scavenging anything that might be useful. If you're really strong, you may have packed up to 60-80lbs to lug into the woods with you. That's a shit ton of weight, but not enough stuff to keep you sustained permanently.

I'd be scavenging for containers to hold water in. I'd want to get any tools I can find. Or anything that could be used as a tool. A hatchet seems like a great idea until you've cut through 3 1ft logs. Then you realize you really needed a saw... stuff like that.

I'd also be really, really concerned about security. 3 guns is great for survival, but you only brought, at most, 400 rounds of ammunition. You don't want to expend 25% of that trying to escape other men who want you dead. So you're going to want to keep your fires limited to when you absolutely need them. Dogs could find you easily, so hope nobody REALLY wants you dead. Find a spot far away from trails, in a well-wooded area, perhaps tucked in between two large features - they'll serve well as a wind-block too, for those cold nights.

>Most of us don't know what it's like to go 2 days without food. It's fucking terrible.
I did almost a week, on water alone.
Up to 3-4days I functioned sort of ok, the following days were quite a challenge.
Not even innawoods, it was exam period and I was flat broke and too busy to bother.
After this period I first drank a multivitamin juice and ended up pooping all of it in matter of minutes.
Took about 2days to settle digestion.
Passed 2 major exams tho, I'm EE now and packed.

So basically if you don't get food by day 2 you done goofd.


I'd go for:
>look for natural shelter, no time to build any shit
>look for stream, maybe take a bit of time to get nearer to the source
>try to get some fish

Eat sum bugs yo

>not becoming a woman trap

Dig a hole, reinforce with wood, make it comfy. Install a lid, cover it. Settle in, pray to Taara & the earth spirits for good luck. Wait until the commies arrive and give em hell, follow my grandpa like he did after Tannenberg.
We /metsavennad/ now

what the fuck
jejeejejej

this is why I am going to be bugging in
I'd rather stay in the attic and eat the possums and rats that get in there and drink rain water

>Build *pic related*
>Find qt.3 gf
>Have 10+ kids
>Retire
It isn't that hard guys!

Forget toothbrush, no dentists left,die.

If life had literally devolved into some shitstorm like The Road, literally what would be the point of struggling for survival? I'd eat a bullet without hesitation once it was clear that civilization would never be restored in my lifetime.

>new zealand
>not building a hobbit warren

>leave stupid woods
>why did I go there?
>go back to the city
>violate the NAP
>become king or die trying
>found country

top kek
NAP falls over when the shit hits the fan

yes the takedown rifle how i wished i had one/could get one

dude dont go deep in to the woods, find quit village towns and take control over it, no sleeping in the woods you larpers

set up my solo camping shit

pull out a folding stool and my fishing rod

become lake hermit

Fuck squirrels
Someone has to repopulate the planet

Keep going my dude my cock is diamonds rn

Probably die from radiation sickness.

...

Wtf

i might consider attempting to escape to ireland, because it has a much smaller population density. I live in central london at the moment so "fleeing to the woods" is an entire adventure in and of itself

Catch a bird and cum on it before letting it fly away.

Take out my dad's gun and blow my fucking head off, no use in continuing if civilization is gone

I'd move out to the countryside where my family lives. There are guns and tons of wildlife to hunt and fish. There's also a vegetable garden out back that has some potatoes, cucumbers and herbs growing in it. I'd be alright

sounds comfy
why aren't you there now?

Hory shit

Is that Bagel Soo?

ficki ficki

Hey that's a pretty good ID

>fleeing to the woods
What a dumb idea. There's enough resources in small towns and villages to last you months, they're easier to defend, sturdy well made shelters already exist, small populations are easier to manage and unite. Go into the woods and you're probably gonna eat a fucking mushroom or berry that kills you

I don't get it whats the deal with this post

Top quality ID

Put most of my stats in Charisma and be the jew if the wasteland

Break into places and steal shit. Take some weapon if you get caught but hiding your identity won't be necessary because the place has gone to shit so probably no police enforcement

Shieeeeet

this guy is running the thread for a while
>tfw never have a boss id

pic related will be you

your skin is black isnt it?

Sheeeeeeit

This is the most solid plan in this thread.

I mean you're right, but my plan to stay in my roof and eat vermin
thats pretty solid too

SHIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET

Good point, you have the second most solid plan, you must cum on the vermin first though.

I dunno sounds kind of degenerate but I'm not entirely sure. I think further discussion is needed.

what if I use someone elses cum?
I don't produce it you see

This would be acceptable, you must begin harvesting it in jars before the Happening.

Post tits

anygood narratives about a vague post apocalypse like The Road?

Aren't Shelias supposed to be stacked?

ロンドン
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ド
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facebookfileneame.jpg

Try reading a Venezuelan newspaper. They are collapsing so you can experience what it is like IRL.

The mass graves come next down there.

I'm really fat, my boobs are dwarfed by my flab

p-pls no bully

Fuck did I miss tits? Goddammit.
Any chance you could make a thread on /soc/ or Sup Forums?

they arent good tits

What kind of world ending?

Nuclear fallout, zombie apocalipse or the simpler collapse of the society?