Zimbabwe Pastor Eaten by Crocodiles After Trying to "Walk on Water"

telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/05/15/pastor-killed-crocodiles-trying-walk-water-like-jesus/

You can't make this shit up.

>A pastor who tried replicating the Biblical story of Jesus Christ walking on water has been eaten by crocodiles.

>The pastor, identified as Jonathan Mthethwa, of the Saint of the Last Days Church, tried the demonstration at a river known as Crocodile River.

>Mthethwa, from a local church in White River Mpumalanga died Saturday morning trying to demonstrate the biblical miracle to his congregants.

According to The Herald Zimbabwe, he drowned into the Crocodile River and was seen by his church members getting eaten by 3 crocodiles.

>Deacon Nkosi, a member of the church, told the newspaper, “The pastor taught us about faith on Sunday last week.

Why do liberals still pretend these drooling 60-point IQ niggers are our equals? How much more obvious does it have to get before people see reality?

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youtube.com/watch?v=93aPfV8I2PA
youtube.com/watch?v=9IwJDqgUgNs
youtube.com/watch?v=A11XKY5pFR0
youtube.com/watch?v=jlGuVcbexBw
twitter.com/AnonBabble

Clearly this is the white man's fault and they should be kicked out again

Maybe he just slipped.

>Mthethwa
>Mpumalanga
>Nkosi
How the fuck are you supposed to pronounce this shit? You can't just have loads of consonants like that.

The Falklands are English.

Those crocodiles broke international racism laws.

LET'S RIOT AND BREAK THINGS

Yes they are.
Please let's be friends and send more Welsh immigrants to Patagonia we need to replenish them. Too many Bolivian illegals these days.

they are BRITISH.
They belong to the British Crown, the Kingdom, no just to England.
scots,welsh and irish can populate them freely.

>scots,welsh and irish
Also English possessions.

Jesus loves you.

He probably didn't know nile crocodiles could live outside of the nile river.

...

Pastor experienced the power of god's creations, eaten by real Goliath.

I love African pentacostals.
>youtube.com/watch?v=93aPfV8I2PA

you are a Kingdom.
a Kingdom has provinces that are PART of it. England is now an autonomous entity with patches of land.


it's like england being the red dinasour, ,both parts of ireland the triceratops and sabertooth tiger, scotland is the gorilla.
all together make the megazord

>all together make the megazord
Are you the whitest man in Argentina?

...

>Saint of the Last Days Church
Aka Mormon.
Galatians 1:8 ►
But though we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed.

Moar. I can barely believe this.

>youtube.com/watch?v=9IwJDqgUgNs

...

youtube.com/watch?v=A11XKY5pFR0

fucking black people. I want to feel pity for them but it'd hard. Don't worry I'm not a "civic nationalist" at this point in my life I wish all black people (and some other groups as well) would just ease to exist

you made me remember my childhood trauma of not being able to buy the lightspeed rescue megazord toy, which was also a transformer, combined together(not like the plastic-block megazords)

P.R. went to shit at mystic force/SPD trough

>youtube.com/watch?v=jlGuVcbexBw
the israelites are now making videos of violent anime with a related bible verse

ZIMBABWE!!!

Are you saying white people don't get eaten by crocodiles? What about that little white kid who got eaten by an alligator in disneyland?

The first thing I ever bought with my own money that I earned from doing chores was a $16 Voltron toy where you actually disassemble it in to the individual fighters.

How long I would lie in bed imagining when I would finally earn $16 and have that thing in my hands.

I miss the times of toys.
videogaming is shit now. arcades are great, ps2/GBA was cool.
but now people just game to compete, not to chill.

>little kid
Exactly my point.
Subsaharan Africans have the IQ of white children.

I'm glad I wasn't born later than I was. I'm total shit at vidya, but multiplayer gaems were getting big when I was in school, and it was a serious source of social bonding once I figured out to get everybody whipped up in the fun of it like a sports game instead of who wins.

Our memories drown on the black tar of regret

>the skin tone isn't even the same

fucking christ

TBQH grass eating was an ancient monastic practice in Egypt