Brit/pol/ - Russell Howard Doesn't Want You To Vote For UKIP edition

Are you going to let him tell you what to do?

>Latest shock poll shows conservative losses
thetimes.co.uk/article/latest-general-election-poll-predicts-conservatives-will-lose-seats-02zfwl8lc

>Corbyn follows up car crash with a disaster on mumsnet livechat
telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/05/30/huge-disappointment-mumsnet-users-vent-fury-jeremy-corbyn-leaving/

>Corbyn suffers childcare car crash interview at hands of Women's Hour
bbc.co.uk/news/election-2017-40090520

>Lastest Owen Jones and Peter Hitchens
theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/may/30/theresa-may-bores-britain-election-labour-hustings
hitchensblog.mailonsunday.co.uk/2017/05/happy-oak-apple-day.html

>Zoo worker killed by tiger
bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cambridgeshire-40089174

>Sturgeon calls for IndyRef2 at the end of Brexit process in Manifesto
bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-scotland-politics-40086276

>Labour plans will see your council tax triple at least
express.co.uk/news/politics/810616/general-election-2017-jeremy-corbyn-council-tax-bills-homeowner-john-mcdonnellVote

Other urls found in this thread:

archive.is/ohssa
theguardian.com/politics/2017/may/31/jeremy-corbyn-urges-theresa-may-debate-with-him-in-public
archive.is/XJkXv
youtube.com/watch?v=nl330yhfndk
youtube.com/watch?v=3fbUqcc2bGs
youtube.com/watch?v=ud8QLDzjBds
hooktube.com/watch?v=nl330yhfndk
hooktube.com/watch?v=3fbUqcc2bGs
hooktube.com/watch?v=ud8QLDzjBds
independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/labour-leads-conservatives-latest-poll-25-34-younger-voters-jeremy-corbyn-theresa-may-a7764581.html
archive.is/AVgvS
twitter.com/britainelects/status/869873153635487744
twitter.com/jeremycorbyn/status/869866720042909700
independent.co.uk/news/business/news/pound-sterling-fall-dollar-euro-poll-tories-hung-parliament-theresa-may-labour-a7764366.html
archive.is/nu9au
theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/may/01/boyfriend-wonderful-loving-has-tiny-penis-penetrative-sex
archive.is/MPKvu
archive.4plebs.org/pol/search/text/archive/country/no/page/1/
twitter.com/PA/status/869873652711477248
pastebin.com/WJhNa2DR
youtu.be/NtJAGYTUXVE
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

remember to archive sources with a reputation for crap journalism and clickbait. Thank you.
archive.is/ohssa

im voting labour

>im
Checks out

God I hate that man's face.

HARD to argue with these

CUTE

bot pls

My dad voted labour, my grandad voted labour, my grandfather voted labour.

So why shouldn't I vote labour?

Are you a bot?

Same. Fuck raising taxes and making public services worse.

Of course you are.
If you can manage to find your polling station first.

>So, true story right, I swear to you that this actually happened
>I was talking to my mate Dave the other day, right and he said he was going to vote for UKIP
>I was like "Dave, mate. Don't vote for UKIP. They're a bunch of racists"
>and then he said "I see now Russell, I regret my choice to vote for UKIP"
>Brilliant, innit?

t. Russell Howard

why is may such a pussy
theguardian.com/politics/2017/may/31/jeremy-corbyn-urges-theresa-may-debate-with-him-in-public

why won't she debate corbyn?

she's scurred

Please remember to archive sources with a reputation for shilling and clickbait. Thank you. archive.is/XJkXv

...

More of a monarchist but I've become an accelerationist just to get this shit over with. The longer we wait the worse things get. I don't know the solution or how we make it happen but I sure as fuck know what we're doing now is only making things worse.

This dystopian shit hole can't keep going much longer.

She debates WITH him every PMQ.
American cuck.

>yougov predicts hung parliament
So it's a tory majority of 90 then

>Gender pay cap

What is this shit?

This is an election not a soap opera.
If you cared about debates between the two you would have watched the PMQ's.

Scotland, YES!

...

Look at what you heartless bastards are doing to these poor disabled people. LOOK.

youtube.com/watch?v=nl330yhfndk

youtube.com/watch?v=3fbUqcc2bGs

youtube.com/watch?v=ud8QLDzjBds

>unarchived The Guardian video
Use hooktube to prevent views

hooktube.com/watch?v=nl330yhfndk
hooktube.com/watch?v=3fbUqcc2bGs
hooktube.com/watch?v=ud8QLDzjBds

What was Nige doing in Westminster?

So what is everyone's thoughts on this new yougov poll?

why do young people hate the conservatives.

you're all young, why aren't you voting labour?

independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/labour-leads-conservatives-latest-poll-25-34-younger-voters-jeremy-corbyn-theresa-may-a7764581.html

>Gender Pay Gap

Archived that shit so they don't profit:

archive.is/AVgvS

listen to some fella on LBC talk about how labour are the right people to vote for because they've costed their manifesto within the same breath he says that costing a manifesto before brexit is a foolish idea ayy

As relevant as someone from an Asylum telling you that they're a God.

kek

The state of the British media is fucking disgraceful. The one thing that was actually a good idea in Labour's manifesto was the Land Value Tax. Council Tax is an atrociously shitty way of funding local government. Economists - mainly on the liberal side (what people would call right wing, why I don't know) - have advocated that LVT is a far more suitable tax system.

If this had been proposed by the Conservatives - and it's shocking that it was Labour and not they that did this - it would be celebrated to the high heavens. As such, it's just attacked pointlessly because muh mummy May.

you ned to provide us with a list of "acceptable" and "unacceptable" news sources.....

>worse than a farm animal
>his free flat is on the first floor

>@britainelects 2m ago

>Westminster voting intention:
>CON: 48% (+1)
>LAB: 33% (-)
>LDEM: 7% (-)
>UKIP: 4% (-1)
>GRN: 2% (-1)

twitter.com/britainelects/status/869873153635487744

>Russell Howard's Good News
>Cut to Howard's gurning, ADD head as he starts to talk
>"But not everyone's happy with the way the country's going"
>Cut to clip of man outside polling station: "I voted for XYZ because he is the only one advocating tighter immigration controls"
>Cut back to studio, close-up of Howard's face, mouth open in a wide smirk. He is shocked. There is a deathly silence in the studio.
>"Let's just hear that again"
>Clip plays again. "immigration controls"
>Howard smirks and bellows "it's alright mate, don't believe everything you read in.."
>audience members lean forward in their seats
>"...the DAILY EXPRESS!?"
>Audience erupts into uproarious laughter. One man laughs so hard he rolls forward and wallops his head against the seat in front of him.
>IMMIGRANTS ARE NOT GONNA EAT YOUR SWANS AND STEAL YOUR DAUGHTER, MATE
>Several audience members spontaneously combust
>"SERIOUSLY MATE? IMMIGRATION CONTROLS!"
>The studio's foundations shake with the sheer volume of laughter. Five hearts give out under the strain.
>"ME NAN WAS AN IMMIGRANT, YOU WANNA THROW HER OUT TOO? YOU HAVEN'T TASTED HER LEMON MERINGUE MATE"
>A crack of lightning splits the studio in twain as Russell Howard ascends a stair made of clouds to return to his home in the heavens

Date is wrong before you sperg out

I don't need to provide you with anything

>health minister
>fat cunt

Every time

>In 1987 the returning officer told Lord Buckethead to remove his helmet/mask because they weren't allowed. He said he couldn't because it was his head.

Apparently it's the same bloke this time around. Love it.

>tfw money is an issue until it's not.

did she draw this herself?
or the only thing this is missing is her in her bed dreaming this was the truth.
this ladies makeup eekkkk

Utter bollocks. Even labour sources expect to be losing seats not gaining.

>15 points

COVFEFE MAH NIGGAS

>Second Referendum not in SNP manifesto

What did the Scots mean by this?

How low can UKIP go?

Why is mummy too scared to debate?

twitter.com/jeremycorbyn/status/869866720042909700

holy shit. the markets are predicting a hung-parliment.

im investing in BTC now

independent.co.uk/news/business/news/pound-sterling-fall-dollar-euro-poll-tories-hung-parliament-theresa-may-labour-a7764366.html

I wish it was legal to euthanise people over a certain weight. Just look at her house, she doesn't deserve taxpayers money, Jesus, kill her.

Please use archive.is on blogs renowned for trash journalism and clickbait.

archive.is/nu9au

thank you for the Karen, sister

Typical labour voter

I bet this is what we'll see on the 8th, it'll end up being a triple figure majority.

>free NHS car parking
wtf im voting labour now

>halt new grammars
Indefensible
>muh gender pay gap
Disgusting
>200k new homes pa
Not going to happen, and in terms of space we can't afford to do it

And it goes without saying that their means of funding all this is pure fantasy

Please stop with this attempt to make us rally around the "Conservative" Party, who are probably the main enemy of traditionalist right wing politics in the UK

daily reminder that if you have a small penis your wife will leave you theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/may/01/boyfriend-wonderful-loving-has-tiny-penis-penetrative-sex

remember to archive blogs renowned for crap journalism and clickbait.

archive.is/MPKvu

Nothing is stopping him from still going along to these debates. His followers should be telling him to go to the one tonight and clean up with his amazing debate skills.

Scottish Westminster voting intention:
SNP: 43%
CON: 25%
LAB: 25%
LDEM: 5%
(via @IpsosMORI / 22 - 27 May)

God bless him.

>22 kids and young teens die
>only party that wants to bring back internment camps and deport people is ukip and they will never get into power
fuck it
i'm voting labour
lets give the people what they want, i'm taking the black pill lads

but which news sources are "acceptable" by your standards.

give me the blacklist

INB4 he gets BTFO by the SNP and the Greens and loses votes.

>Fucking hell, equivalence to a kid in the playground who thinks money grows on trees.

archive.4plebs.org/pol/search/text/archive/country/no/page/1/

The fucking state of this bot.

Mongs panicking over a yougov poll. Meanwhile panelbase has tories 15% ahead

As I say that...

>@PA 5m ago
>#Breaking Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn set to announce he will take part in tonight's live TV general election debate, according to sources
twitter.com/PA/status/869873652711477248

...

>it really is about time politicians start living in the real world

His comedy is
>This person disagrees with me and is a poor representation of the argument he wishes to produce
>Everybody laugh at this person

And this is why he has a shit TV show in which he compiles people with similar infantile minds and manages to squeeze in enough of them to make the TV ratings passable. If he was actually a good comedian he'd be selling out arenas and regularly touring.

When did our comedians become so shit?

Where did she get her makeup done? A pantomime?

>labour
>t. Pakis

We can go lower.

*Theresa May's entrance music plays half-way through*

Looks like the Coliseum announcer in Gladiator

>German Chancellor Angela Merkel says "we will negotiate Brexit in the spirit of Britain remaining a partner"

Flaccid Brexit coming up.

>This person disagrees with me and is a poor representation of the argument he wishes to produce

...but that's literally Sup Forums mate

>Russell Howard

Glad this cockeyed faggot's shit got cancelled over here. He was about as funny as chili induced diarrhea.

pastebin.com/WJhNa2DR

Neil talking about zionists on DP

wew

What is it with Labour supporters?

...

It's a carefully curated list managed by shilling and clickbait experts and it's all happening at my subjective discretion. If you're on it, tough shit. I'm the SPLC of clickbait.

Homer Simpson shotgun

>200k homes a year

This one is my favourite because I work in construction and know first hand you'll be lucky to find 200k gangs of brick layers in the UK. 50k homes a year will be a push.

the media is really pushing corbyn

not a bot. its a real person hired to shill on britpol.

its his parents i feel sorry for

>voting for a party because muh parents and their parents did the same thing.

Maybe you should think for yourself for once, and then vote, come on your a big boy now, start making your own decisions.

>What is it with Labour supporters?
Islam

>Zionist shill

ZIONIST SHILLS

Can you elaborate in what way the average Conservative young voter is any different? Have you talked to any of them recently? They're the sort of people who think about based black Conservative men, honestly think that supporting gay marriage makes you pro-family, and generally hold the exact same views as a young Labour voter. The only difference is that young Labour voters suck a little harder on Muslim cock than young Tories, whilenyoung Tories are more enthusiastic in giving a handjob to Jewish financiers than young Labour. Both are traitorous cunts.

Pic related, it's Conservative members in Glasgow. Totally different, right?

One commie block complex can have 200 bachelor sized apartments in it. You know, homes.
Space isn't a limiting factor, money is. Places people want to live cost a lot of money, because if they live away from work they have to travel.

Neil cracking down on anti-semitism

>hired

>ZIONIST SHILL

>labour 25%

Fucking hell we'll never get shot of the snp

youtu.be/NtJAGYTUXVE