Hello sir, we'll be your pilots today

>hello sir, we'll be your pilots today

wat do

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youtube.com/watch?v=GJ0i5Ede8V4
youtu.be/MKanHBY7eA4?t=107
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>wat do
die in a fire of twisted metal

not with teeth like that you aren't

>wat do
Thank God that it's mostly automated

>female autopilots
I exit the premises.

Jump off the plane and warn everyone before it launches.

holy shit where s the parachutes

Hope the ground personal can understand pidgin

no am wey autopilot no am wey landing

Ok thanks for the thread this gonna be the final post ok good thread gnight guys thanks for participating this is the final post however so dont post after this ok thanks guy appreciate it a lot your a good lot you know alright bye bye dont post after this comment thanks.

Make sure they know there's a really lit KFC at the destination airport.

Hop in my seat and worry in the slightest. Woman are perfectly capable at being pilots as it's not a physically demanding job and the safety systems on modern airliners are amazing.

Now, if I was a civilian in a warzone being evacuated on foot by these bitches...fuck that, I'll take my chances alone

>plane flies itself
You could have a literal monkey in the cockpit.

VIDEO RELATED
I
D
E
O

youtube.com/watch?v=GJ0i5Ede8V4
youtube.com/watch?v=GJ0i5Ede8V4
youtube.com/watch?v=GJ0i5Ede8V4

Wetin ground crew controla gon do wetin sky fly-fly machine smash into trade tall-bildin

Immideatly leave the plane

Crash the plane with no survivors.

>You could have a literal monkey in the cockpit.

Actually pay attention to the flight attendant when they do the emergency procedures that day instead of playing on my tablet.

9/11 dis bitch into The Statue of Liberty

cool cool.
can I come in your cockpit?
lets get to making brown babies, ladies.

Worry about Chinese first
youtu.be/MKanHBY7eA4?t=107

Are the flight stewards every where else gay

So, how many relatives are in prison?

Jokes on them, this will be a short flight because they dont retract the landing gear after takeoff

Are you drunk?

It's fine, even a monkey could fly and land planes at airports with ILS Level 3 these days given there are no technical faults.

>Allah akbar
>I am commandeering this plane
> I am going to crash this plane with no survivors
>End credits roll

Tell them to quit taking selfies in the cockpit and get back to their real jobs.

with no survivors

Hello cuties :3

... Crashing this plane

Kek

And coincidentally I developed a fear of flying today of all days.

Turn 360° and walk right out the cockpit.

>women driving
dangerous

>nigger women driving a plane
m*rica fuck yeah!

Lets see how many newfags will bite the bait

Shake it
Shake shake it
Shake it like a Polaroid picture heeya

it's 540º you fucking retards, go back to primary school, imbeciles...

*720 Spainiard

I want to sit in the Cuck-Pit.

>all these non airline pilots talking about how easy it is to fly jets

*180+360x

CONDUCTOR WE HAVE A PROBLEM

>papers please

Member the Bains Conspiracy?

WE WUZ AIRPLANE PILOTS N SHIEEET

"Yo, peepz. We'z gown fla dis' plane right here. I gotz herez because i iz a diversty hire. You feelin' me?.

...it's ok, I'll walk

HELU, SER, WE BE YA PELOTS N SHEEIT.

Wonder if I've gone back in time to when kids were allowed to go to the cockpit and look in awe of all the buttons and everything.

Y-YOU'RE
NANI??????
BRACKU PIRUTO????????
Prease tell me you're just keeping their seats warm

allahu akbar because apparently i've stormed a barricaded door, and stolen the passwords from flight attendents and a dead air marshall, to get to the cockpit.

yah, 99% of the flying is autopilot now. The pilots are at this point really just emergency crew. Theres a reason you hear about every plane crash, but less than 0.01% of car crashes. Because planes almost never crash.

>being this dumb
THATS FUCKING CIRCLE YOU NIGGER; YOUR STILL GOING SAME DIRECTION

>why have you let me in the cockpit?

>wat do
Emergency exit, assuming you're still on the ground

BONGO14 we is 12000, heading 380, request approach vectors for KFC, BONGO14...

Turn into an orb and teleport away.

Bullshit. Affirmative action is fatal.

Take my seat and start looking out the window until after takeoff.

There was a third plane.
There will be a third plane.

ive had plenty of black pilots. flying a plane is just a fairly complex mechanical act, blacks can do those fine; look at the army.

>ive had plenty of black pilots
In your ass, I assume.

>grab my phone
>add the $1-mil dollar crash insurance policy to my ticket
>say goodbye to my family, but die calmly knowing they'll be better off

no, they were flying planes in which i was a passenger. why does your mind immediately go to gay sex?

Second.

>gives announcements to passengers in pidgin

do a 360 and walk away

Your not fooling us, faggot.

Turn 360 degrees and walk away

If this is an African airline, I'd be more worried about the shoddy state of the airplanes. Maintenance is notoriously bad in 3rd world countries.

rest assured because they look like ugly nerds so they probably know how to pilot the plane

But how will you tell if it's a newfag or an oldfag making a joke?

Stop it guyse pls.

time to switch airlines

Nigga stole my airplane

>dis be yu capetdan speakn *smacks lips*

Oh i'm sorry, i forgot i have a bomb on me.

> Next time on Soul Plane

>Oh, ummm... I seem to have forgotten some luggage, be right back
>*sprinting to parking lot noises*

>bait
wat bait? we don't use the metric system in America, retard.

>Hello good sir, I will be your surgeon for today

how do you respond?

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
OK! :-D
Thanks for doing the duty of a doctor, nigger.

...

motherfucker

Light up tha blunts bitchezzzzz.
LET'S GET HIGH!!!
>J/K. EXIT PLANE IMMEDIATELY.

Hey!!! That's my plane!
Kek

>That'll be $39.99. Plus tip. :)
wat do?

Flight student here and I believe you, user.