User kun!!!! Watashi ga ninshin shita nda!!!!

>user kun!!!! Watashi ga ninshin shita nda!!!!

How do you respond?

If you're gonna live in my basement, you're gonna have to learn to speak american.

I've never understood what that pink thing is supposed to be.

speak english you crazy jap, and quit waving that piss stick around

It's a tongue depressor.

With a coat hanger.

gomenesai

Welcome back from your trip to Mexico.

>Eh? Nandatte?

Dodge:successful

u wöt

YAA~ GOMEN GOMEN

Pregnancy test

so how do these even work?

Wow what's even the point
Pregnant women are obviously pregnant

Omedetou. Chichioya no shoutai ga wakaru?

I guess you just have to shake it and it'll tell you if you are pregnant or not.

You shoot your load on the stick and then stick them in the designated slot. After a while you pull it back out and if it's got a plus sign on it, boom you got a girl pregnant. That's how you make babies.

you pee in it and it detects hgh a component your body makes when pregnant

I'd question how I could've cheated on my waifu with this girl, and commit harakiri.

How is this a real thing?

So, only she can choose to have an abortion or not? How does that work?

Yeah right.

ZEN ZEN WAKARANAI

...

Dodge while simultaneously imlying slut-status

sasuga

Well you see the child is 100 percent hers until it becomes time to pay for it in which case she shares.

If you're a woman you get to do whatever the fuck you want with it.

If you're a guy you get to pay alimony.

Thats pretty fucking sugoi.

Im gonna go commit sudoku.

So you know you are pregnant before it's obvious. How fast díd you think it takes for it to be noticeable?

Dostedt

Slap her until she speaks English.

Instantly. She'll have "that glow".

ああ、そうかそうか
死ね

These guys can't be serious.
Didn't you take sex ed?

>tfw no gf like Asuna to play games with

>mfw

>shita nda
Better get back to studying.

Do you expect people on Sup Forums to know how the female anatomy works?

OMEDETOU!! OMAE DARE DA!?

Talk to her using Polish tongue twisters until either she starts speaking English or her brain melts.

I'm expecting fellow adults to not be retarded yes
Why do I keep doing this?

Get out.

Congratulations. Who's the father?

(You)

How? I'm a cuck so I only let other men cum inside her.

I'd get a parent DNA test done to prove it's mine before I take responsibility. I hope she doesn't get pissy about that.

Eeeeeeeeeeeeh!? Ore!? Ore kono ko shiranai yo!

...

Otou-san wa dare da?

Wa-i, Yatta! Yatta!

>He doesn't know what that pink thing is so he must be a retard
Yeah, no

ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER.

DO YOU SPEAK IT?

Basically this. The moment a woman talks about trouble with her contraceptives, she's gonna baby. You can usually call it within a week of conception.

The point is so they can prepare for it and possibly do something about it.

I don't speak chink

In a non SAO world she is top tier waifu material.

First thing I'd do is have to try and learn Japanese quickly or hope that as a player of online games she knows English.

だれだ？

okay lad

>このスレ

virtualworld.jpeg

KUYASHII

This means I made Kirito a Hahnrei, which is a reward in itself.
I'll take responsibility.

Virtual sex causes virtual babies?

SA
SU
GA

SE
NP
AI

日本語ができません

Fuck nigga, get that gay as shit out of my face. Fucking speak English you fucking gook. Fake ass bitch be trapin. I ain't paying no god damn child support for your sorry ass.

So white it hurts

Yeah, yes.

But then again, retards on /a is nothing new.

Could you repeat that in english?

>How do you respond?
Probably by first correcting her terrible Japanese.

Sacrifice to Aiwass.

Like murder the child?

I'm glad someone posted this.

The correct answer.

to be exact it's hcg that is detected, which stands for something something gonadotropin which a woman's body starts secreting after her egg's been fertilized

hgh stands for human growth hormone (if i recall correctly) and basically regulates your growth, so like your bones, muscles, skin and all that shit

そっか。

>you fuck someone in VR
>they're pregnant in real life
Absolutely horrifying

Get him to the hospital

fck off, leave!!!!

wakarimasen lol

This thing is useless user

My waifu is gonna carve the baby out of your stomach. Sorry asuna.

Edgy schooldays waifu son?

...

Just the standard yandere response i suppose.

Hai, Kazuma desu

>user kun!!!! Watashi ga ninshin shita nda!!!!
This is not something anyone would ever say. They would say "Akachan dekichatta" or "Akachan ga dekita" or "Watashi ninshin shiteru"

"Shitanda" kinda implies that they were pregnant but they aren't any more.