Cakes

Why are we apparently supposed to laugh at their misfortune / desperation?

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Because of the idea that their misfortune was a result of them rejecting the advances of many potential suitors in the past back when they were younger, more attractive, and thought too highly of themselves. Something like that presumably.

Or it's just shadenfraude

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>Because of the idea that their misfortune was a result of them rejecting the advances of many potential suitors in the past back when they were younger, more attractive, and thought too highly of themselves. Something like that presumably.

Not Always. Let's not forget Densei of the 100 failed visits.

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Can males be cakes or are they named something else?

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Why are they always drunk?
Why are they always alone?

Does Japan like seeing them suffer that much.

>Can males be cakes
Well, looking at the entirety of Sup Forums, yes, it is possible

A man being single in his 20's is nothing special

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the ratio is about 107 boys to 100 girls

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>male
>cake

Those are called (You).

Because humans laugh and ridicule anyone failing at our literal only purpose in life, to breed and produce healthy offspring.
There is nothing more pathetic than a single woman past her fertile age.

Every Christmas Cake has at least one personality flaw that prevents her from landing a man.
Remember what Chris Rock said: "Behind every beautiful woman is a man sick of her shit."

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Tell me more about these "cakes" you speak of.

We mean cute cakes, user. And I'm sure there's a few in the animeshpere.

Wouldn't that just be wizards, then?

I thought the age limit for guys was the same age for wizardry ascension.

NOOOOOOOOOOOO

Is there a single sadder cake than her?

Wizardry and Cakes are not the same thing because men and women are different and have different goals in life.

Men can have perfectly fine children well into their old age so there's no rush for them to get married and settle down, instead they should focus on fucking as many women as possible while you're young and virile, so being a virgin who turns 30 represents a fundamental failure as a male.

Meanwhile women have a strict time limit on their reproductive capabilities and attractiveness. There goal in life is to find a man to take care of them and to pump out babies. This is most effective when the girl is young, still attractive and her eggs haven't deteriorated. So a female being unmarried and single at 25 means she has failed at finding a man while in her prime.

Of course the term "Christmas Cake" is pretty outdated, even in Japan and the age of average marriage has risen worldwide so I'd say that 30 is the modern day cutoff for women being "failures." Also note that Wizardry focuses on sex while Cakes focus on marriage. A man could be married and successful while 30 and still be a wizard if the marriage was sexless. While being a cake has nothing to do with being a virgin and is all about her getting that ring on her finger.

kek

>you will never cure a woman's sexual frustration

>create a girl this cute
>try to make me believe she isn't married at 27
Nice try, Japan

>Sucks at sex
>Vice grips men so hard they cum instantly
>It's the guy's fault because men are selfish

Is it just that no one ever told her that's not how you do it or what?

Vaginismus isn't voluntary, user.

So what would be the dude equivalent, then? We already know we can get some delicious Ojisans out of old age like we can with cakes, but how can we combine this with marriage?

They get drunk because they are alone, and they are alone because they get drunk.

is ojisan really the right word for that?

Then you find the ones with flaws you like
Are you a masochist? go for the Tsundere
You have an odepius complex? Yandere Onee-san for you
and etc

>but how can we combine this with marriage?
We don't because men and women are different. There's a reason why women grow up wanting to be brides and mothers while guys generally don't have those as immediate goals, they're more like things that happen at some point.

>literal only purpose in life
It's overpraised purpouse anyway. Right now humanity as a species can benefit more from people not focusing on reproduction.

>Series about a young guy relieving older women's sexual frustrations.
This is good shit despite the "complete virgin dude becomes a sex god after having sex once" cliche.

I want to spend a pleasant evening cuddling up with Yomiko while we read and drink tea together

best cake coming through

>Not satisfied unless he's an alpha delinquent.
Yeah she fits the mold here .

Will Chisato be the first cake to win in a good while?

That Not-Evagelion made by Bones, the Cake wins and the movie version has a sex scene

Didn't the cake win in Garo?

Rah Xephon is old as fuck dude.

>Because humans laugh and ridicule anyone failing at our literal only purpose in life

do you know where you are, friend?

I-I'm sorry, what's this from? I haven't watched an animated hentai for like a year because they're mostly shit, so I'm out of the loop.

Like a cake.

Where is that from?
I would marry her.

>I would marry her.
wouldn't that just end up like that movie final destination, where going against fate just leads to the universe turning against you to correct this?

Good taste Sup Forumsnon, but that's MY cake!

Unless my fate was to go against the fate. Or at least try.

She popped the MC's cherry after his gf died. I don't know if they got together in the movie or not though. Seems like a good chance since he has to pass on his genes and has no one else.

good taste user

is RahXephon any good besides the cake winning?

Is ReLIFE cake anime?

That's some fine taste yourself but we're going to have to settle this one way or another. Now that I think about it R.O.D had a bunch of Cakes if I recall, Yomika, Nenene, Maggie, Nancy, Wendy, Michelle, etc.

Holy shit i want to pump so much baby batter into these cakes.

>Is ReLIFE cake anime?
nope

it's vanilla shit with a fun premise that exceeds expectations momentarily.

MOMENTARILY.

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But best girls are cakes.

Joshikousei no koshitsuki?

Because a NEET can always get a job and improve their fortunes. A cake is a loser bitch that exists to get consistently fucked over by guys because she never learns from her errors in judgment.

It's an Eva clone down to its absolute core. If you liked Eva, then probably.

Question: if a girls has been married before but got dumped because she's barren, can she still be considered a cake?

Returned Cake

Old and used

Would you eat a cake if you knew someone stuck their dick in it?

depends,was her packaging opened or not?
not that I care either way

implying these implications

Divorcée

This Christmas Cake is close.

Worked on a kitchen once, you wouldn't believe the shit people do the food of certain types of clients.

>Oh 8man, I'm so clueless!
>I'd love to get married but I just don't know how to do it
>If only there was a handsome young man who would accept me and know how I feel about things
>You know, we've been talking a lot lately. It's almost like we're getting to know eachother as more than teacher and student
>Did I mention I'm single and desperate?

She's not sad, she's many steps into her keikaku. A decade from now she'll be close to 40 and have a hot piece of younger armcandy. Thirty years after that and her middle aged husband will be able to take care of her during retirement.

I'd be okay with it, sensei best girl

I really hope Yahari ends in the househusband route 8man dreams of.

What do you think being Sensei's cute, younger househusband would be like?

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read the VN

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Who is this? She seems to appear in many cake threads

> She's not sad, she's many steps into her keikaku.
> mfw even if i knew about i would still follow her keikaku
Sensei best girl

youtube.com/watch?v=cZIi5YZJqQI
Poor sensei

Why is the love between a younger, asocial man and a hard working older woman so perfect and pure?

Guys don't have that much of a biological clock though.

>Why is the love between a younger, asocial man and a hard working older woman so perfect and pure?
swarthmore.edu/SocSci/bdorsey1/41docs/51-fra.html

>Christmas cake actually won

And she got the best boy for her.

>8thly and Lastly They are so grateful!!
how could one man be so based?

Have you ever tried to woo a Cake in real life, if so how did it go?

>3DPD
>ever

He never said 3dpd

I live in burgerland, cute cakes don't exist here.

Phantom quest corps

I'd like to know as well. Especially with those fucking laser eyes.

Is that a cake thing?

Not following this. What's the details?

>Men can have perfectly fine children well into their old age
Does not follow logically into
>they should focus on fucking as many women as possible while you're young and virile

Cake principal got with another side character of similar age.

Based af

Holy shit. Fuck yes Ben.

What are times when a Cake has won, or at least gotten a good end?

So many of them go stale.

Is a cake a cake if she has been bitten into many times but still has leftovers?