ITT: We write hyperbolic greentext stories depicting life in Ancapistan
I'll start
>gets hit by a truck on the McRoad company's private access highway >Fuck all those tolls do I have a quarter? >Feeling lightheaded, trying to concentrate >Insert 2 quarters into my phone >H-hello Burger King Hospital? I need help I just go hit by a-- You must deposit another 50 cents to continue your conversation >fucking rate hikes >insert the quarters >H-hello I .. I.... >Blood streaming from my head, losing consciousness >I... >dies
At least I'm not a bootlicker
Michael Wood
>spend over 1 billion dollars developing a medicine >rival company rips me off and copies it for free >complain that this is a violation of my private property >ancapistanians tell me that I do not have the right to own that product I created >ask them why they have the right to own private property and homes and everything else >autistically screech >I wake up from the nightmare and assure myself I would never move to an ancap outpost anyway because I'm not a faggot >make myself a sandwich and go on Sup Forums >yell at the ancaps >go back to bed
Thomas Martin
>ancapistanians tell me that I do not have the right to own that product I created >invoke the non-aggression principle >squeeze your earlobe 3 times >your swarm of nano-drones flies out from your back pocket and shoots a deadly neurotoxin into their brains >missile silos open at your property and proceed to target the rival company >I mean they violated the NAP >radiation flies into the yard of the McDonalds naval shipyard a few miles away >sirens blaring >McDestroyers decimate your property >yfw
David Jenkins
Bumping with OC from my meme page
Kayden Gonzalez
...
Dominic Robinson
Implying right wing libertarianism isn't the most important redpill and that this isn't a shill thread
Brayden Watson
>everything I don't like is a shill thread
Bentley Scott
You shills always try to use that nonargument
Josiah Perry
McMercenaries?
Jeremiah Butler
have a meme
Asher Martin
>When the local water baron's aquifer runs dry, 100 years ahead of projections, and your child blood desalinization patent is finally worth an entire Bitcoin, which you invest into further R and D, and now you're economically competitive with every water Barron in the country, but you're running out of children so you buy out every condom factory in the region and innovate holes into the condoms, violating the nap, but you put fluoride in the child blood water, making the populace compliant, so no one cares.
Owen Nelson
...
Brandon Martinez
I find the pajeetpooaway™ toilets by Indian Plumbing Inc. unsatisfactory, I prefer shartinmart™ waste removal and dining system developed by Nordic Americans Ltd. as a better alternative.
Jose Foster
relevant OC
Joshua Torres
Do I have to live there or can I just go on the weekends for shits and keks?
Angel Rivera
i offer orbital rides in my space zeppelin, equipped with high power scopes and mics you watch the chaos unfold completely safe from mcnukes
Cameron Kelly
What happens when I leave a 1 star review?
Ryder Fisher
the answer to the mcnuke question
Isaiah Mitchell
>try to start ancap paradise >can't get anything done due to no infrastructure and no cooperation >starve to death with over 9000 bitcoins in the cloud
Tyler Gomez
>be liberal snowflake who wanders into ancap society >walk into local home depot >aisle 2 near the wood and human organs is slave aisle >slave aisle organizes slaves by color, the white ones being in the very back >snowflake gets triggered home depot doesn't put black slaves in back of store to force you down the aisle. Even ancaps have white privilege >But putting blacks in the back of slave aisle would trigger blacks because they can't be put in the back of anything >incoming autistic screeching >home depot employee approaches snowflake hello sir can I help you? "did you just assume my gender??" "did you just commit a..." >microagression >home depot employee violated nap >autistic screeching intensifies >home depot employee blows himself up with his self defense C4 vest to escape the autism
Matthew Nelson
>when your whole philosophy is bullshit because corporations are a form of government and capitalism requires corporate cooperation
Isaiah Watson
>Googlosoft Corp. has been data harvesting every bit of information of every person with the new "retro flip phone" they shove down every ones throats because they bought and murdered there competitors so now they can just release shit tech with just enough sophistication to track you. >so now they collect all the data on you and they brainwash you and black mail you into submission to continue buying their shitty products so they can eat baby foreskins from a shaved cats belly without anyone bothering oh wait
