Umineko

EXTREME CLUEDO THREAD
So who did it? Do witches exist? IS Erika best girl? And what's Bernkastel's bust size?

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Magic exists

Only in your mind. Not in reality.
Also, what's Bern's cup size?

I want to deito Lucifer.

Posting best Seacat.

Lucifer is a stake, not a girl. You can't date a stake, user. Best you could do is put it up your arse.

Delusions to delusions, user.

>incompetent
>inferiority complex
I want to bully Lucifer

Ok man, have fun shoving a stake up your arse as you scream Lucifer's name. If anyone found you they'd thought you died during a satanic ritual

that's the dream

The things I'd do to her with duct tape

Currently rereading while recording and uploading it for an online acquaintance with analysis. Shit is more heartbreaking the second time around. Getting to talk Seacats whenever I want is a bonus.

If magic isn't real, explain this.

Erika is literally the worst, lambda and bern ftw

Patriarchy did the Rokkenjima massacre

>Getting to talk Seacats whenever I want is a bonus.
It was suffering being halfway through, having no one personal to discuss it with while also having to avoid the threads on Sup Forums because of spoilers.

Every thread until we reach the Golden Land.

I will always maintain it was Gohda. Not even that theory you posted, but it was definitely Gohda.
What people don't realise is that every single murder in Umineko happened in the kitchen. And Gohda can't lose in the kitchen. He then moved the bodies.
Easy. No magic. No witches. Just Gohda. In the kitchen.

I'd love to see Erika animated

I'd love to see Erika riding my duck. We can't always have what we want.

Hello, my name is Ronoue Genji copypasta where?

Today i will remind them.

Nice edit

I'm going to make Sayo my bride!

Yasu has no dick
ha ha

What if Battler had a vago?

>Shannon
>breasts

That's not Sayo.

I want to fuck Lambdadelta!

she would be severely disappointed since

Honestly if you make her have the exact same personality and lines of dialogue she would be best girl
Also whoever drew that pic really managed to capture his smug personality

I'd fuck that.

Oh man, about a month or so ago Ryu-chan tweeted something about a second Umineko artbook and shitloads of people interpreted it as a confirmation of a Chiru anime. For like a full two hours I was hyped as fuck. Even if it was DEEN, just to see Erika animated. And Dlanor. And all those fight scenes.
I really wish they made another season, even if it's DEEN, I don't care.

beato?

>who did it?
The bomb
>Do witches exist?
Yes, but they trascend our world. Look at Bern and Lambda. It's also unclear how much can they affect our world directly.
>IS Erika best girl?
Yes
>what's Bernkastel's bust size?
C or D in the original vn
>Gohda can't lose in the kitchen
Game master tip confirms it

>Gohda can't lose in the kitchen
>Game master tip confirms it
Therefore Gohda is the killer. Unreliable narrator for the entire series of novels. Gohda killed everyone in the kitchen, since he can't lose there. He then moved them to all the places where the bodies were eventually discovered.

Got any Blue Truths to counter this? Didn't think so. But I'd like to see you anons try.

Why would someone that strong need to kill anyone?
Did you forget to factor in THE HEART user?

Since you didn't use Blue, I won't use Red.
However. The heart is present. Gohda loved Natushi. This is evident from Ryukishi's drafts. Gohda needed to elope with Natsuhi. Killing everyone would leave them the inheritance so they could elope.

Also, it's easy for Gohda to get people into the kitchen. He can call them there for help (servants) or to have them taste a nice delicacy (Ushiromiya family). Once they're in the kitchen, he can't lose.

Damn it
Is there anything that could counter this?

No. It is the absolute truth. It surpasses the Red truth and even the Gold truth. It is the GREEN TRUTH. The undeniable complete truth that can not be broken!

>GOHDA TOSHIRO IS THE CULPRIT. HE LURED EVERYONE INTO THE KITCHEN WHERE HE CAN'T LOSE AND KILLED THEM, THEN MOVED THE CORPSES

I don't even want Shannon, I just want to cuck George.

Yasu. Male or female?

Female. Lion was male, and therefore wasn't launched off a cliff in a single miraculous kakera.

How come Eva moves from the worst to kind of cool to the best Umineko girl over the span of all eight episodes? What was going through r07's mind, that madman.

>Eva
>Not Natushi or Kyrie
Get a load of this goat

>Kyrie
Literally the biggest bitch and probably mentally ill, same as her sister.

Kyrie was a psychotic bitch who used her womb to ensnare her lover. She doesn't give a shit about her children at all. She's a fucking maniac and I fucking love it. Over-the-top crazy villains are the best in my opinion.

No love.

Indeed, Eva finally ridding the Earth of the scum that was Kyrie is another reason why she's a solid contender for the top, I agree.

HOW CAN OTHER SEACATS EVEN COMPETE?

This perspective is fucked up. Beelzebub's shoulder is behind Satan's, but Satan's butt is in front of Beelzebub's.

By not being generic stereotypes.

Being in these threads when the games were still coming out was the best

Maybe this will suffice

youtube.com/watch?v=jfNaaqm8xPU

GATARUDO

CAANERIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

It's Kyrie we're talking about. It's entirely possible it was a mind game to get Eva to miss.

I'm aware, but like I said, I love psychotic maniac villains so in my head-canon Kyrie is a ruthless bitch and that's why I love her

Looking at Dlanor makes me want to commit a crime.

Can you imagine the beauty of it?

George spends years courting Sayo. Then Battler comes back and within minutes she's back to craving his dick, no longer needing to settle for a fat Nice Guy.

Severe lack of Umineko ntr cousins.

Rosatrice > ShKanon but only because the notion of Battler x Rosa is pretty hot and weirdly believable

There's no evidence that Battler *didn't* push Rosa up against the mansion wall, give her the best orgasm of her life, and fill her Christmas Cake womb with his seed.

Such is the magic of the catbox~

REVIVING THIS THREAD

THROUGH MAGIC

You're a big witch

For you

After finishing this I conclude magic does yet doesn't exists.

I hate Erika but I would ravage her tiny body.

...

Just finished this and WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?

>WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED?
Fucking nothing, technically.

Never forget when a true witch appeared