How often do you just sit and think? What has been consuming your thought lately?

How often do you just sit and think? What has been consuming your thought lately?

>What has been consuming your thought lately?
cock,mostly.

Why?

I'm sick and tired of women and want to try something new.

Something in me is awake. I don't know what it is, but in want to connect to it, and understand it.

How do you mean "awake"?

>How often do you just sit and think?

Very often.

>What has been consuming your thought lately?

I am a 29-year-old man and my only goals in life are to become the world's first real superhero and then to achieve moksha. I do NOT want to reincarnate after this incarnation of mine. My superhero name will be 'Dragon Man' (because I'm a Dragon, according to the Chinese zodiac). I know it will be a hard and thankless life, but I am ready for it. I am training hard right now to awaken my siddhis.

I'm quite obsessed over getting good and self control, there is a goal and i've been falling short of it a little as of late, thanks for your time CIA.

Well at least we wont have to worry about you for a while.

I bought a massive Christmas Ham and usually I throw the fat away when I cut it off to get to the meat.
This year I started frying it into crackle and now I'm addicted to oven fried ham fat.
Sometimes when I'm making fucc or my boss is talking I don't even care cos I'm thinking about this.

Yeah sounds delicious. I dont eat meat anymore but I bought a 10 pound bag of russets and have been frying my own potato wedges in the skillet; highly recommend.

I grew up in a religious family, and went along with everything because it was all I knew and was normal to me
but a couple years back I realized that I didn't actually believe, I just was indoctrinated and held no personal conviction. I was never baptized because I never actually reached that level of emotional commitment
I still go to church every week with my family and am part of the church community that I grew up in

In the last year I've been questioning sexuality a lot. I've never used porn to masturbate because of some kind of subconscious guilt. When I was 12 I looked up pictures of genitals on wikipedia to see what they were meant to look like, and dad got mad at me because he thought I was using porn. I told him the truth but he thought I was lying, and I didn't know at the time what he thought I was doing so that whole situation was really uncomfortable and stuck with me
Growing up when I fapped I almost exclusively thought of my school friends fapping, rather than fantasizing about any sexual situations involving other people. I didn't think it was gay because I was just thinking of the act of masturbating, which was something I was familiar with myself and not a sexual fantasy involving two guys
In this last year I've realized that I might actually not be attracted to girls at all. I had crushes on a couple of girls in high school, but I never thought of them sexually. It was just "get married and live together" type shit I thought about. I can't think of a time when a girl has ever given me an erection.

1/2

2/2

On the other hand I can definitely recall plenty of times I've gotten erections from guys, and thinking about doing sexual shit with guys gets me hard. Looking back I can see all of the shit I used to do/think about (eg always being more interested in the penis diagrams than the vagina in sex ed) and it feels like everything points to me being gay all along, and just being too dense to realize and/or being in denial due to being religious. I'm clinging onto the hope that I'm just bi, but it feels like vain denial since I don't get turned on by visualizing sexual situations with girls the way I do with guys

There is just one girl my age at church (everyone else is 5 years older and married with babies or 12 years old or younger), and we get along well. Just this week she came up to me after church to talk about the new star wars movie and we talked for a solid half hour about it. We've grown up around each other but never gotten particularly close, we don't really talk about deeply personal shit. I feel some kind of obligation like we're meant to get together, but I never think of her sexually and if I am actually gay then it doesn't help anyone to try a relationship where there's no sexual interest

Just this week someone asked me at church "user when are you going to get a girlfriend" and I just gave a dismissive "I don't know" because there's nothing else I can reveal
I want a boyfriend but I'm painfully aware that I can't ever come out without completely fucking up the relationship dynamic with about 80% of the people in my life, because they would never accept it. But even if I stay single or manage to hide any gay relationship, by the time I hit 30 or even late 20s and am still seemingly single all of those questions are going to get raised anyway.

I feel like my life is an impending iceberg collision and I don't know what to do. I can't pretend to be someone I'm not and I can't hide who I am forever either

WHAT
DOTH
LIFE

that I am the prophet Jeremiah and people STILL don't listen
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Are you a nutjob? Is there any proof for any of that? You literally watch too much anime and you use spiritual stuff as an excuse to wanting to be a "hero". It doesn't justify and you'll get no where. Literal fucking scum, go outside.

Also pic related (it's you)

I do it a lot, but I end up falling asleep a lot

Then people wonder why I sleep so much, and saying: "it's because I was thinking" sounds stupid, so I just say that I was tired. But now people think something's wrong with me because I'm "tired" so often

I just got done eating some honey glazed ham too, along with some fat. mmmmmmm

God is real! Love shall be yours..

Why not talk to star wars girl and ask her out to lunch. See how that dynamic is.

does the thought of fucking or being fucked by guys turn you on? if the answer to said questions are yes, you are gay.

Do you think this might be a phase of some sort and you might magically turn straight one day? If no, save up money tell your friends and family you are gay, if they don't accept you, move to a big city and start life over.

I fapped to the imagination of my friends fapping in middle school. I was bisexual back then but I'm mostly straight now. I think it's a psychological problem user. You might want to talk to a therapist about what you're experiencing.

>go outside.

No. I will do what I want when I want. Fuck off, you abo faggot.