Choose your church

Choose your church.

Note that the Church of Eris is the correct one.

ERIS PADS HER BREASTS

>church

Fuck off Aqua

>choose your church
blind sheep, one day you see the the infinite void that lies beyond death as your only fate

Wolbach's wolbachias

Eris, I don't care if they are not real

>Axis cult
Small, less widespread, not liked by non-believers. Shit Goddess.
Extremely happy, has QT 3.14 waifus and everyone is beautiful

>Eris Cult
Large, widespread and generally liked or tolerated by everyone except Axis cultists. Goddess isn't shit.
The most devout attendees don't really have any strong feelings about Eris.

It's a tough call

Flat chested goddesses > moderate/large breasted dumbass goddess

Daily reminder that sexy brown elf is in Axistown and she hates cult of Eris people.

Eris of course. I don't want an INT penalization.

Why is Axis town full of brown people?

Why does the Cult of Aqua attract people with darker skin?

Aqua specifically says that Axis never discriminates.
When they catch Megumin and Darkness in a bondage session with icecubes, Aqua tells them that if they want to, Axis marries same sex, and her and Kazuma will go to the tavern while they finish up.
Axis is a religion of peace.

Aside from them being crazy and intensely passionate, that's kind of cool. How could the Axis members not connect that Aqua is the same goddess they worship?

Below average intelligence

Probably the same reason you wouldn't believe a long haired guy in sandals on the street said he was Jesus.
But the leader of Axis does realize she's the real deal though, but him and Kazuma agrees to keep it secret.

Axis is fun and good times
Eris is pads and lies

>tfw you will never join the church of Axis and partake in the holy crusade to flood clean the world of heretics and apostates

And then you'll realize that a sheep aware of its position didn't actually make any difference, and his awareness didn't matter in the slightest. As it was a blind sheep walking towards the void feeling some sort of happiness from understanding his demise even if he didn't understand his happiness because it was ultimately based on nothing.

this Also, note that Aqua is the only one in Australia with blue hair and that blue relic she's wearing. Axis believe she's close to a saint due to her dedication and power, but never believe her to be Aqua herself.

...

Why does not one think Chris is Eris?

Your goddess

>wolbachia
THE DINÉ

Why would they? Very few people know Chris even exists, and besides Eris represents piety and fortune.

I want to cuddle with Eris

Isn't Chris nearly found out by two kids at one point?
Besides, it's hilarious how Aqua hides in plain sight:
>Gets jealous of Eris festival
>Throws a festival for herself
>Has Kazuma do the diplomatic work
>Makes Eris work in her stalls
>Paints lizards like dragonsn and scam children out of their allowance.
>Invites half of Axis
>Loudly proclaims she is indeed Aqua, Goddess of water and Axis
>Nobody bats an eye
Aqua is the true master of stealth.

Are there only two churches in the world

True, plus I don't think people would connect that your genki, tomboy, short-haired, flat, thief friend is the holy, great, long-haired, busty Eris.

That we know of, at least. And only one real church out of those two.

Why do people make a big deal of flat breasts? Flat girls grow their breasts after pregnancy.

How does darkness reconcile that she is with the goddess Aqua and she believes in Eris? Does she even know Aqua is a goddess or does she just treat it as stupid banter between Aqua and Kazuma?

Why did the Axis cult papers have the Eris symbol on it?

Probably disavowing Eris

Literally nobody believes Aqua, except Kazuma, since he knows for a fact.
It's commented on a few times, especially by Megumin, when Aqua rants about her divinity
>Oh, you are still clinging to that? Okay.

Oh and the highpowered demons and undeads, like Wiz and Vanir, ofcourse. But even when Wiz calls her Aqua-dono and is close to final death in her presence, they still don't believe her.
In fact, Aqua performs numerous incredible feats that no one human could do, and everyone (including herself) just ignores it.
Kazuma writes it off as everyone being too used to strange things.

Amen

Now that I think about it, being Aqua is suffering.

None of your friends (aside from Kazuma) believes you are a goddess, none of your worshippers (in your crazy religion) believe you are a goddess, and every time you say you are, people just roll your eyes and ignore you Asa crazy person.

I wonder if Eris would have that problem if she went down, not as Chris, but as Eris.

Fucking Zell
>Infused by a literal God
>Infused by a demon king general
>Infused by an arch duke of hell
How long untill the Dragonlord burns Australia to the ground and nests in it's ashes?

Aqua becoming a mom is the best development that she could have gotten without ruining her.

Are Megumin and Darkness not the least bit curious about the origins of Aqua and Kazuma?
Don't they wonder why those two are together to begin with? I doubt they think they're siblings or anything like that

I actually think Eris would be genuinely hurt if treated the same way. Aqua is genuinely depressed and downbeaten when they leave Waterland because her beloved children didn't believe her. The last parts of LN5 are the only times I recall where Aqua is 100% guards down and retard free, and just heartbroken.
I imagine Eris, who's more in touch with actual emotions would take it even worse. For example, she's way more zealous about killing undeads than Aqua ever was.

When they travel to Chuuniland, Megumin and Kazuma are on nightwatch duty, and she actually asks him about his past
>Kazuma, what did you do in the nation you come from, before you got here?
>Well... I stayed up night after night, protecting my comrades and staying vigilant. They called me "the one that doesn't sleep"
>Wow, Kazuma, you were actually something special!
>Aqua from the back: "Hey Kazuma... Can I ask you something about online gaming?"
>"Please don't Aqua-sama"
>"Okay. Goodnight, Kazuma"
>"... Goodnight Aqua"
But he has mulled over several times what to actually tell them about himself and Aqua, and has decided to deal with it when they finally insist. They are however not really interested in general

Agreed. Aqua needed a little development, and becoming a mom was both hilarious and fitting.

That's still better than telling yourself there's a giant old man in the sky.

But in volume 8 she actually descended as Eris and without saying anything everyone believed she was the real deal, wanted to get her blessing and turned the city she appeared in into a place of pilgrimage

Aqua BTFO

Either Zell or Komekko are going to become the new demon lord after Kazuma defeats/befriends the current one. I'd bet 50,000 eris on it.

Prove it.

Why are there so many fucking heathens here?

Oh shit, you're right. My bad.

Because Atheists actually accept the fact that there's no giant old man in the sky. I don't even have a problem with religious people. Just don't force your stupid bullshit on everyone else.

When was this first posted?

My bet is on Komekko. Dust will ride Zell and Komekko has always been an evil fucking catbiter

>Zell reaches the point where he becomes capable of speech
>His first words in front of Aqua are "papa Vanir"

The hype only lasted for a few days.

She also kill stole from Kazuma a demon general kill when he desperately needs exp AND did it during his dramatic monologue which I'm pretty sure is punishable by death/banishment among the crimson demon clan.

>actual religious discussion on a comedy anime thread
Go back to /R/eeeeedit underage fucks.

Don't

>999

I wonder who could be behind this post...

It cannot be stopped, Vanir is just waiting for the day when he can unleash an unspeakably bullying on the useless goddess by using her own child against her.

He is devious enough to pull that off. But if he does, he won't make it back to hell for a third respawn. Aqua is literally the only being he is actually afraid of. And Eris is even more zealous than Aqua, so if she finds out, Australia faces a crusade.

I want to put my dick between Lalatina's tits and Aqua's butt.

I wouldn't actually be suprised if interrupting someones chuuni speech was considered a serious crime in their village.

Is there even any position that lets you do that ? putting your dick between tits and butt

Komekko's great.

Aqua is just fucking best bro. She could have cockblocked beyond saving, but she let's him have his pedoNEET fun.

What if goddesses Aqua really exist?

>when no one has chosen the Church of Madoka

Komekko is evil. Not cute chuuni pretentious like Megumin, or likeable devil like Vanir, but a genuine fucking psycopath.

Madoka is Jesus.

Well said.

Lol it doesn't really matter at all good and bad doesn't mean anything.
Remember what I said about how the blind sheep thinks its knowledge provides some good, which allows it to trot forward making it just as much a blind sheep as anyone else.

Just to keep track, how many people actually know Aqua is the real deal?

>Kazuma
>Mitsurugi
>Probably all the japanese guys from Belzerg since they were living together with her during the fortress siege
>Wiz
>Vanir
>The leaders of the Axis cult
>Wolbach? I'm not quite sure

Also whats up with the old man in the sky deal when The Bible makes it clear God isn't a man and The Bible makes it clear Heaven is in a completely different realm?
That whole statement I see so often is literally made up of multiple layers of strawmen.

>brainwashing lolis
CRUSADE NOW

>Axis cult is so poor their own goddess has to take bread from the Eris cult's charity bread so they can give it to the poor themselves.

Dumb girls like Aqua are really endearing to me so I'd enjoy serving her.

Eris is beautiful but she seems capable of being on her own. Not to say that I'm a reliable person or anything, but I'd much more enjoy giving it my all to the 'bes goddos'.

It's more that that's how it's often interpreted. The christian/catholic god looking like an old man and heaven being above earth(I.E. the clouds)

It'll be Iris. Her POV's just scream budding yandere.

She'll get cockblocked from her destiny as Kazuma's bride by the other girls after he kills the devil king, and become the new one in order to rescue her onii-chan from those sluts.

Seems about right. Not sure about Wolbach either.
Also, I've always found it funny how Eris knows who Aqua is, but Aqua is absolutely clueless towards Eris' avatar.

>Her POV's just scream budding yandere.

I think you're exaggerating, I've never gotten the impression of her being obssessive or even possessive of Kazutrash. At most she periodically wants to meet him against the wish of his guards but that's really it.

>She colludes with Eris, who's been plotting revenge against Aqua for some affront made to her several thousand years ago

This would make me happy. I want to see Mary Sue get eaten by Emperor Zell.

Would Kazuma joining the Eris cult buff his already retarded LCK stat? And make Aqua cry?

That doesn't make sense considering that when people were surveyed only children and atheists actually described God as a man in the sky.
The paintings are just artistic representations because The Bible says to adorn your place of worship weather it's a tent in the desert of a castle on the mountains. I don't really see how an artist could draw a being they believe to be impossible to comprehend.

They do when she appears as herself and not Chris during the beauty contest.

>And make Aqua cry?
I can't imagine she'd take it very well

Most people don't care enough about the christian/catholic version of god to bother learning. The religion is thankfully probably dying.

I think everyone who knows anything about archpriests in the Axis cult knows Aqua is the real deal due to her ridiculous feats in Alcanretia.

>What are brithrates and the spread of christianity around the world.
Pro tip: neets, faggots, and feminists who never marry aren't good at keeping up their population.
The christian church's numbers have fluctuated much greater than it has now all throughout history. This is barely a hiccup.

Just because It's fluctuated larger before doesn't mean it's more now. I mean honestly, you seem to love the idea of an entire of people worshiping what's basically an over glorified imaginary friend. Why is that?

Vanir is just as evil but he's not murderous like Komekko.

KEKOLD GODDESS

>Just because It's fluctuated larger before doesn't mean it's more now.
What

>basically an over glorified imaginary friend.
To an atheist who admittedly hasn't even bothered to learn about the church and still forms strong opinions on it I'm sure that's what you'd think.

Vanir isn't a psycopath, he actually cares for Wiz, despite his male tsundere.

Axis Cult also seems to guarantee a higher chance of survival, since the members are stronger and crazier. Plus Aqua actively protects and blesses her followers, while Eris kind of just does nothing. Certainly doesn't make them luckier considering how they're all living in Fantasy Australia.

t.devil

Eris does plenty of stuff, not least of which is being a divine magic source for priests.

Eris cult. Axis cult members are twats (just like the object of their worship).

>To an atheist who admittedly hasn't even bothered to learn about the church and still forms strong opinions on it I'm sure that's what you'd think.
In my defense, I went to church up until I was either 11 or 10. Maybe 12. Am almost 22 now.