Sir, have you been drinking tonight?

>Sir, have you been drinking tonight?

You've had one bottle of beer. How do you respond?

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yes, what are you goin' to do about it faggot.

I'd tell him the truth. I'm a white guy who acts with tact and respect. Every time I've dealt with cops its been no problemo, paco.

lol why is it so bright tonight my dude yeah

I had one beer, officer

Yessir, had one with dinner about 45min ago. Planning on continuing when i get home safely.

Back off, cracka! I dun nuttin!

>reaches for drivers license
>get shot

"No sir, here let me show you"
*pulls out gun and shoots cop*

Get a warrant you fat fuck

AM I BEING DETAINED?!?!

No.

The best thing you can do with police is give them as short of answers as possible and keep the length of interaction as brief as possible to avoid getting dragged from your car and shot in handcuffs.

Wanna race, bitch?

i shoot myself, thereby forcing the cop to shoot himself as well

>Am i being detained?

THIS CAR IS A RECOGNIZED ADMIRALTY COURT OF THE HIGH SEAS

Be honest and cooperative.
If you've only had one beer, you have nothing to worry about.

DO YOU HAVE A WARRANT TO SEARCH MY VEHICLE?!?!

RIP IN PEACE 360 WALK AWAY

>you have nothing to worry about.
God I wish I was white.

Uh, respectfully sir, it's the middle of the day. Are you feeling okay?

How do you avoid getting shot in that situation?

SHIIIIIEEEEET Y'ALL MUFAKAS JUST PULL ME OVER CUZ I'M A NIGGA AIN'T DAT DA TROOF MAN IS A WONDER I DON'T CAP YO ASS RITE NAO

I don't
I just floor it
spin 360 degree
and drive away

>1 beer
"yeah i had a beer when the ball dropped. i've had no other alcohol though"

then go from there. you can't get a dui if you've had one beer, unless you're a skinny manlet or a woman.

breh

>t. Retard

Has nothing to do with being white. Hes just never been in the situation before and hes an idiot.

I swear to drunk I am not God

why would you want to avoid getting shot?

Prepare for...
>SIMON SAYS LICENSE AND REGISTRATION
>SIMON SAYS STEP OUT OF THE CAR
>GET ON THE GROUND
>I DIDN'T SAY SIMON SAYS
BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG

are you insane, am i being detained, shooting me i ask you to refrain, shirts dirty i need some gain.

My dad is your boss.

>How do you avoid getting shot in that situation?

You crawl towards him.

If you had one beer you don't have to worry. Unless you have it in your lap while he's standing there

fuck off cunt or ill shove that baton where the sun don't shine

>"No offi-"
>"SIMON DIDN'T SAY ANSWER THE QUESTION. YOUR WORDS ARE A THREAT TO MY SAFETY"
>get shot

While holding a bottle of Scotch.....not a drop officer.
Not a drop.

Never admit to drinking. Never answer any questions. You will only hurt yourself.

A police Sargent I fish with told me to absolutely deny any alcohol intake if asked “nope, not a drop”.

Admitting to any alcohol consumption gives them probable cause to search further like a breathalyzer, etc.

YOURE FUCKED HANDS ON YOUR HEAD NOW HAND ME YOUR WALLET AND RECITE THE ENTIRE BILL OF RIGHTS YOU TOOK YOUR HANDS OFF YOUR HEAD *BANG BANG BANG*

This exact scenario happened to me. Was honest, told him I had one beer. Had me get out and do a field sobriety test and blow breathalizer. I cooperated and passed the tests. I was sent on my way.

>refuse road side test
>get carted to station
>blood alcohol levels drop during time
>must perform test at station
>its law
>pass because i bought enough time
Only one beer?

always lie 100%

Get shot and die.

God bless america.

fpbp

>not having the bill of rights memorized
You should be shot

just waiting for a mate

>last night
>dd for friends as I'm not a drinker
>drop friends off 45 mins away from house at 2am, drive home
>police checkpoint
>concealed carrier so I place both hands on wheel
>he comes up to window and asks me to step out of car
>tell him I'm a concealed yadda yadda
>asks me to put the gun in the glove box
>comply
>get out, he asks me some questions and sees I'm clearly not drunk
>sends me on my way
>there's 4 people sitting on the side of the road with their cars
execute degenerate pieces of shit

>I keep my hands on the steering wheel and turn my music down.
>Roll down the window all the way.
>Smile and say "Hello officer" when he walks up.
>Immediately he relaxes.
>"Uh yes, hello. How are you?"
>"Just fine officer, how was your holiday?"
>"Uh good, yes. Anyway have you been drinking tonight?"
>"Well I did have a beer but that was 4 hours ago. I'll take a breathalyzer if you want. Sorry for the trouble sir."
>"Well, I think you're ok. Just drive safe and maybe don't drink before you drive anymore."
>"Yes sir, I won't. Thank you sir."
>He walks away.
>I turn my music back on.
>I drive away to my house with my wife.
>We chat and talk about my day
Man it's nice being white and not insane.

enjoy your dui

>"Only one beer, officer. May I remove my driver's license from the glove compartment for you to inspect?"
>Slowly open glove compartment
>Remove grenade pin and hold the grenade in my hand.
>"You shoot me, we're both history. Now let's take it nice and easy, officer. I wouldn't reach for the gun if I were you. I'm going to drive off now."
>Start driving
>Throw grenade at cop
>Speed away
>Explosion
>Tune to Vladivostok FM
>"Grupa Krovi" starts playing
>Cousin calls and asks me to go bowling with him

DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE

youtu.be/bqd8bKzaPHs

BANG BANG BANG

So many emotional retards ITT.

It's like Sup Forums has been infested by niggers.

I had one beer during dinner sir

>*steps out of car*
>"Sir, remain in your vee-HICK-le"
>*Scratches head*
>*Gets shot*

HANDS ON YOUR HEAD
TURN 360 DEGREES AWAY FROM ME AND CRAWL ON YOUR KNEES
SOLVE THE RIEMANN HYPOTHESIS
TOO SLOW *BANG BANG BANG*

I had one bottle of beer

kek

it used to be against the law to eat meat on Fridays, 150 years ago. imagine how dumb you will sound to your grandkids in 50 years

'I've had one bottle of beer officer, have a nice evening'

>having to take a breathalizer test if I'm unlucky, but I am allowed to drink a bit and have nothing to be afraid of
>not getting shot today

God I love living in the first world

>Sir we're going to shoot you
>Get shot
>National Anthem start
>Bald eagle fly in formation under f18
>Acrobatic handicap scooter team start doing wheelies around my dead body while I bleed sirop
>A bunch of black women claps with tears in their eyes as if Michelle Obama himself told them they were strong and beautiful
>Alex Jones use the opportunity to plug his vitamins
>Bunch of Apache are tactically dropping hamburger now as Nicki Minaj is being parachuted with red, white and blue flares sticking up her ass

>One bottle of beer is enough to give you DUI
Wut? A normal adult male needs like 2-3 in short order to get to .08 here in PA. You don’t get a DUI if you’re under that, just a finder wag and a stern lecture.

You could potentially get ticketed for reckless driving since you're under the influence of *some* alcohol.

A. FUCKING. LEAF.

Lol, what's up Bill. Like my new ride? Yeah, I'm off today. Don't kill too many "African """""Americans""""" while I'm away.

i never drink only one bottle of beer.
One bottle of vodka would be more realistic.

We're glad you're not.

As much as this was meant to offend us burgers, I found it hilarious.

Top Kek, Maplenigger

Good day officer.

No officer.
*Hands Insurance, Registration, and ID*

Wow that was hard.

>hurr durr white priviledge
Just don't act like a nigger and you'll be fine, it's retard pakis over here that say this shit to me, I wondered what they meant.

Then they told me they were getting in the officers face and pulling our phones.
Just fucking treat them with some respect to stroke their ego and comply you subhuman

>How do you respond?
>You've had one bottle of beer.

LOL

it was meant to be funny you buttblasted amerimutt

by not living in muttmerica

if you are recklessly driving but still under the legal limit then you'd just get ticketed or warned for reckless driving and no mention of alcohol would be needed

"YALL DAMN WHITEY BEEN OPRASSING ME"
*i reach for my packet to take out the phone to record the evil whitey"

yes i have
been pulled over some weeks ago and drank like 2 vodka redpull and some hard liquor
He asked me if i drank, i said yeah
He did an alcohol test with that handheld device, i passed and drove home

Dont you guys have some sort of tolerance, we can drink till 0,5 promille without anything habbening

A very unexpected plot twist and a nice finishing touch.

Where I am we don't have those sobriety checkpoints so the only reason why a cop would pull you over is if you were driving funny.

t o p k e k

You guys drink more over there so of course

AM I BEING DETAINED?

>”HE’S REACHING FOR A WEAPON”
BANG BANG BANG

HEY HOL UP
SO YOU BE SAYIN IM PULLED OVER
HALL NO PIG
THE FUCK YOU BE THINKIN

>sir please calm down

FUCK YOU PIG, HOL UP FO A SEC
STFU BITCH
*smack woman next to me*

>sir step out of the car

FUCK THIS RAYCIS SHIT
ILL BEAT YO ASS PIG

*police officer calls for backup and gets a tactical position

HEYO, IM COMIN OUT OF THE CAR OFFUCER
HOL UP

*bitch starts yelling dont do it babe
*3 more officers roll up

HOL UP SO U BE SAYIN

*get shot 5 times and be declared civil rights hero

Police here will fuck you in the ass if they think you've had any amount of alcohol.

chimpout like a nigger and reach for his gun

>living in a city where driving is a requirement

Autocucks WILL defend this!

>Just fucking treat them with some respect to stroke their ego and comply you subhuman
Imagine being this much of a bootlicker
Do also invite the cop over to fuck your wife?

>Pls don't shoot me....

I GOT PTSD!!

You should have your ID, Insurance, and Registration out in your hand with both hands touching/gripping the wheel you fucking faggot.

It's not hard.

Try to grab his gun because I'm a good boy on my way to church and I din do nuthin

fucking doubt

I will be in about 15 mins. Just getting home from work. I'm sure you know that feel officer.

What are you on about?

>good evening officer
>just the 1 beer sir
>here is my license
>of course i will take a breathalyzer test
>pass
>thanks for your time officer, good evening!

Versus a nigger:

>AYOOO DIS FUGGIN RASSIST MUFUCKA!!
>reaches in pockets

>say yes
>refuse to take breathalyzer
>get arrested
>hyperventilate in the cop car as to lower my BAC artificially but lessening the amount of booze in my breath
>take official breathalyzer at the station
>pass because I wasted time and also hyperventilated
I legit got out of a DUI by doing this a few years ago

...

>muh bootlicker
These people have the power to put you in a prison cell and interrogate you for 12 hours without charge, and in america to shoot you 5 times in the head with zero repercussions.

Have some fucking common sense and pick your battles nigger